再接再励发一篇，求评分+建议

IELTSwinnerUID: 3312344

昨天看到版主的建议，回去又思考了一番，今天再发一篇文章求评分和建议

题目：These days people pay more attention to artists and give less importance to science and technology. Do you agree or disagree？

The boom of the art has reached such proportion that people feel the access to the up-date advance of technology has been obscured. It is ambivalent to claim whether it is detrimental to the society since art and technology both benefit people to some extent. Personally, I disagree with such assertion that people pay more attention to art than to the science.

Adherents of the dominant role of art in people’s daily life hold that art works seem more humanized and more easily to be understood compared with cold-blooded machines yielded by the high-technology. The popularity of some famous artists indicates that people's aesthetic incentive constitutes a part of the nature of human beings and should not be stripped off from people’s life.

However, the importance of art emphasized by the society does not lead to the recession of technology necessarily. Opponents argue that the development of the science, nevertheless quiet and speedy which is often beyond the senses of individuals, never become less indispensable in the society. For example, the emergence of the new version of Ipod, together with the latest Justin Bieber’s single, has already been necessities of the young generation. Moreover, the prevalence of some new products spawned by the technology, such as Ebay, exemplify that the trend is not restricted to junior citizens who stand at the edge of new technology but is also evident among the senior citizens who are traditionally believed to be blunt to the change of technology.

To conclude, I reckon that although people may easily focus on the improvement of the art, technology never walks away from people’s daily life. Hence it is specious to assert that the importance of the technology has been overlooked.

bqianaUID: 193168

4.5-5

rokinhrcUID: 3273530

2# bqiana 为什么呢？总觉得不止这么点分的这个楼主

IELTSwinnerUID: 3312344

模板已经深深地扎在脑子里了……换个方式也还是不自觉地用模板

bqianaUID: 193168

that is true