issue47（那来就写，限时）

雪夭UID: 142334

47 Society does not place enough emphasis on the intellect—that is, on reasoning and other cognitive skills."

真的限时，那来题目就写，是机警中的，放上来前只改了错字，效果不好啊，这样限时才看的出来有多烂。ps：没上课被老师点名了，系里的笑面虎，我死定了~~~~~~~

I fundamentally agree with the assertion that community should pay attention to the intellect, because it is an effective way of analyzing issues and help to achieve success. A the same time, however, education should realize the importance of emotion, such as creation, passion, desire and so forth, and coordinate the two parts, or the society would trap in a rigid net.

Granted, by learning reasoning and cognitive skills, students observe and analyze things with objective eyes which help them to make in-depth research and contribution to various field. At the scientific level, any researcher must be a person who masters special knowledge well and can point theories or experiment with substantial evidence. Take electric bulb as an example, in the process of experience, Edison tried his best to put his knowledge into practice and denied thousand of filaments according to various consequences; as a result, eventually he found out real material by accumulating information and reasoning. In the business level, to be an successful businessman, the one should learn to analyze market an point our reasonable plan to satisfy the demand of society, or the company might gain a few customers, not to mention profits. Therefore, without using intelligence and rational thoughts, in most cases, people might feel confusion about problems and fail to make any improvement.

Nevertheless, human beings are social animal so that they have to spend time with others and sometime they have own inclinations, ideas and dreams so that to better lead people into community, society should emphasize the significant of emotion. On the one hand, every person has family, friend and social life, if the one fail to express his or her emotion, it might be hard to keep the friendship and the relationship of parents; after all, a rigid person know little about love and the one also gain little concern. On the other hand, in most fields, emotion would be an effective means to purchase success. When it come to the invention, a scientist who desire to success mush have enough passion to motivate the energy, and of course he or she should feel interest in the work, or the failure would stop the research for disappointment and tired heart. Accordingly, emotion is an motivation to touch with the society and achieve success, otherwise, the community would only be an rigid net.

Obviously, intellect and emotion both pay essential role in human life so that the society must make a balance between them rather than overemphasize on either of them. If a person only live depending on ration and objective, he or she would feel dull and tired to continue work and life; if a person is full of dream and airy ideas, the one might frustrate in such a pragmatic society. On the contrary, by learning such two skills, human life would be easier and full of color. Apparently, ration and emotion create a brilliant community and facilitate social life.

Understandably, the society has responsibility to emphasize the importance of intellect for its realism; however, it is impossible to neglect the function of emotion. To better improve the society and individuals, education and community should make balance of them and develop the two parts as skill of survival.

雪夭UID: 142334

顶一下先，冒着被骂的风险写文章，那砖头慰劳一下啊

coolwitsUID: 149150

47 Society does not place enough emphasis on the intellect—that is, on reasoning and other cognitive skills."


I fundamentally agree with the assertion that community should pay attention to the intellect, because it is an effective way of analyzing issues and help[ing] to achieve success. At the same time, however, education should realize the importance of emotion, such as creation, passion, desire and so forth, and coordinate the two parts, or the society would trap in a rigid net.

Granted, by learning reasoning and cognitive skills, students observe and analyze things with objective eyes which [can] help them to make in-depth research and contribution to various field. At the scientific level, any researcher must be a person who masters special knowledge well and can point[point? support会不会好点] theories or experiment with substantial evidence. Take[taking] electric bulb as an example, in the process of experience[in the experiment], Edison tried his best to put his knowledge into practice and denied thousand of filaments according to various consequences; as a result, eventually he found out real material by accumulating information and reasoning.[爱迪生没什么reasoning巴?他是实干家，一种一种去试，朋友的胡子都被殃及，sigh] In the business level, to be an successful businessman, the one should learn to analyze market an point our reasonable plan to satisfy the demand of society, or the company might gain [a 删掉] few customers, not to mention profits. Therefore, without using intelligence and rational thoughts, in most cases, people might feel confusion about problems and fail to make any improvement.

Nevertheless, human beings are social animal so that they have to spend time with others and sometime they have own inclinations, ideas and dreams so that to better lead people into community, society should emphasize the significant of emotion.[超机长句阿，组织得不好，不妨拆开] On the one hand, every person has family, friend and social life, if the one fail to express his or her emotion, it might be hard to keep the friendship and the relationship of parents; after all, a rigid person know little about love and the one also gain little concern. On the other hand, in most fields, emotion would be an effective means to purchase[pursue] success. When it come to the invention, a scientist who desire to success mush have enough passion to motivate the energy, and of course he or she should feel interest in the work, or the failure would stop the research for disappointment and tired heart. Accordingly, emotion is an motivation to touch with the society and achieve success, otherwise, the community would only be an rigid net.
[ts和你后半个分论点不符合]

Obviously, intellect and emotion both play essential role in human life so that the society must make a balance between them rather than overemphasize [on删掉] either of them. If a person only live depending on ration and objective, he or she would feel dull and tired to continue work and life; if a person is full of dream and airy ideas[这里要把话说完，没有。。。], the one might frustrate in such a pragmatic society. On the contrary, by learning such two skills, human life would be easier and full of color. Apparently, ration and emotion create a brilliant community and facilitate social life.

Understandably, the society has responsibility to emphasize the importance of intellect for its realism; however, it is impossible to neglect the function of emotion. To better improve the society and individuals, education and community should make balance of them and develop the two parts as skill of survival.
[论证不深入，例子马虎
限时的通病， 和我一样啊， sigh
我觉得我们要好好总节一下，不要只顾埋头乱写]

绞尽脑汁UID: 143951

最初由 雪夭 发布
[B]顶一下先，冒着被骂的风险写文章，那砖头慰劳一下啊 [/B]

I fundamentally agree with the assertion that community should pay attention to the intellect, because it is an effective way of analyzing(to analyze) issues and help to achieve success. A the same time, however, education should realize the importance of emotion, such as creation, passion, desire and so forth, and coordinate the two parts, or the society would trap(应该用被动吧） in a rigid net.

Granted, by learning reasoning and cognitive skills, students observe and analyze things with objective eyes which help them to make in-depth research and contribution to various field. At the scientific level, any researcher must be a person who masters special knowledge well and can point(out?)theories or experiment with substantial evidence. Take electric bulb as an example, in the process of experience, Edison tried his best to put his knowledge into practice and denied(abandon) thousand(s) of filaments according to various consequences; as a result, eventually he found out (the)real material by accumulating information and reasoning. In the business level, to be an successful businessman, the(去掉the) one should learn to analyze market an(a) point our reasonable plan to satisfy the demand of society, or the company might gain a few customers, not to mention profits. Therefore, without using intelligence and rational thoughts, in most cases, people might feel(be?) confusion(confused) about problems and fail to make any improvement.

Nevertheless, human beings are social animal(s) so that they have to spend time with others and sometime they have own inclinations, ideas and dreams so that(能换一种表达吗) to better lead people into community,(句号）society should emphasize the significant of emotion. On the one hand, every person has family, friend and social life(最好用people，后面跟复数), if the(去掉the) one fail(s) to express his or her emotion(可以用feeling吗), it might be hard to keep the friendship and the relationship of(with) parents; after all, a rigid person know(s) little about love and the one also gain little concern(and后的句子没看懂，有歧义). On the other hand, in most fields, emotion would be an effective means to(of) purchase(?) success. When it come to the invention, a scientist who desire(s) to success(succeed) mush have enough passion to motivate the energy, and of course he or she should feel interest in the work, or the failure would stop the research for disappointment and tired heart. Accordingly, emotion is an(a) motivation to (keep in)touch with the society and (to)achieve success, otherwise, the community would only be an(a) rigid net.

Obviously, intellect and emotion both pay(play?) essential role in human life so that the society must make a balance between them rather than overemphasize on either of them. If a person only live depending on ration and objective, he or she would feel dull and tired to continue work and life; if a person is full of dream and airy ideas, the one might frustrate(sth frustrates someone) in such a pragmatic society. On the contrary, by learning such two skills, human life would be easier and full of color. Apparently, ration and emotion create a brilliant community and facilitate social life.

因为我才开始准备issue，所以很难从文章的逻辑上给你把握，我只是在语法和句式上帮你做了些修改。
多注意单复数，有些词组和单词可以换着用，句子的结构多斟酌。
也许是刚开始限时写吧，不过也不错了。我现在还处在一写一下午的阶段，郁闷~
Good Luck !

绞尽脑汁UID: 143951

coolwits水都从鼻子里冒出来了，呵呵~

雪夭UID: 142334

Edison其实我只是想说明他的认知能力，没想到把哪个也写上去了
purchase[pursue]是可以的，范文中也看见过啊
谢谢，限时就是这样不好，一上来看见就写，想到什么没时间揣摩，我觉得很难短期有什么进展啊

雪夭UID: 142334

On the other hand, in most fields, emotion would be an effective means to(of) purchase(?) success. When it come to the invention, a scientist who desire(s) to success(succeed) 前面和最后应该是没错的。
touch with the society and (to)achieve success to应该可以省略

限时我就没蛰了，速度一提、就顾不上语法

绞尽脑汁UID: 143951

Accordingly, emotion is an(a) motivation to (keep in)touch with the society and (to)achieve success, otherwise, the community would only be an(a) rigid net.
如果我没弄错的话可以把你的前半句这么理解：emotion is a motivation to keep in touch with the society and IS A MOTIVATION TO achieve success... 可见在这个并列结构中，to不能省略。

猫咪meUID: 155478

I fundamentally agree with the assertion that community should pay attention to the intellect, because it is an effective way of analyzing issues and help to achieve success. A(at) the same time, however, education should realize the importance of emotion, such as creation, passion, desire and so forth, and coordinate the two parts, or the society would trap in a rigid net.

Granted, by learning reasoning and cognitive skills, students observe and analyze things with objective eyes which help them to make in-depth research and contribution to various field(fields). At the scientific level, any researcher must be a person who masters special knowledge well and can point theories or experiment with substantial evidence. Take electric bulb as an example, in the process of experience, Edison tried his best to put his knowledge into practice and denied thousand of filaments according to various consequences; as a result, eventually he found out real material by accumulating information and reasoning. In the business level, to be an successful businessman, the(去掉) one should learn to analyze market an（and） point our reasonable plan to satisfy the demand of society, or the company might gain a few customers, not to mention profits. Therefore, without using intelligence and rational thoughts, in most cases, people might feel confusion about problems and fail to make any improvement.(爱迪生的例子不能有力地说明，或者你的表述不够到位)

Nevertheless, human beings are social animal so that they have to spend time with others and sometime they have own inclinations, ideas and dreams so that to better lead people into community, society should emphasize the significant of emotion. On the one hand, every person has family, friend and social life, if the one fail to express his or her emotion, it might be hard to keep the friendship and the relationship of parents; after all, a rigid person know little about love and the one also gain little concern. On the other hand, in most fields, emotion would be an effective means to purchase success. When it come to the invention, a scientist who desire to success mush have enough passion to motivate the energy, and of course he or she should feel interest（interested） in the work, or the failure would stop the research for disappointment and tired heart. Accordingly, emotion is an motivation to touch with the society and achieve success, otherwise, the community would only be an rigid net.

Obviously, intellect and emotion both pay essential role in human life so that the society must make a balance between them rather than overemphasize on either of them. If a person only live depending on ration and objective(adj. ?), he or she would feel dull and tired to continue work and life; if a person is full of dream and airy ideas, the one might frustrate in such a pragmatic society. On the contrary, by learning such two skills, human life would be easier and full of color(colorful). Apparently, ration and emotion create a brilliant community and facilitate social life.

Understandably, the society has responsibility to emphasize the importance of intellect for its realism; however, it is impossible to neglect the function of emotion. To better improve the society and individuals, education and community should make balance of them and develop the two parts as skill of survival.

观点倒是清楚，就是没有有力的例子来充实文章。可能在现实条件下，语言的琉璃也不如上篇。我更烂。嘻嘻。

雪夭UID: 142334

谢谢猫猫，我们都是奔3。8的人了
加u~~~~~~~~`