issue35 37分钟就写完了~自己都汗~

so猫UID: 148633

issue35
"No matter what the siruation, it is more harmful to compromise one's beliefs than to adhere to them."

When facing with the serious situation that oppose to his belief, one has to make a choice between compromising with others and adhering to it. The speaker claimed that compromising would bring more harm rather than the action of adhering does. As far as I am concerned, the choice has to be under serious consideration before it is made according to the different situations.

Under some circumstances, adherence to his own belief is the best way to guide an individual out of troubles and chaos. Take myself as an instance. In the process of my preparation for GRE examination, the high standards for AW and the difficulty in memorizing huge vocabulary made me depressed. Moreover, one of my friends quitted the test at the last moment in last October. The only thing that inspired me to carry on and stimulated me to study harder is my belief that I can succeed in this test so as to continue my further study. It may seem a bit unbelievable that confidence in oneself-only a psychological factor is among the reason to carry on an "mission impossible". Yet for me, without the courage and stimulation from my belief I am not sure whether I can sit here to complete my AW test. From this point of view, the adherence to belief supplies with courage and bravery to people in despair while the compromise leads loss and giving up.

On the other hand, it is wise to choose compromise rather than arbitrary adherence when all things illustrated that his/her belief is no longer proper or correct. Belief, which has been long existed in many minds of people, to certain extent may contain something banal or overdue. As the society develops at such a rapid speed, the conflict between the newly-born perspectives and the old belief is occurring in any place, at any time. At this moment, the choice of compromise sounds reasonable and preferable. Back to decades of years ago, it was believed that women who intent to work outside were regarded as evil; however, with the process of Industrial Revolution, increasing population of women chose to go outside at the same time society had to compromise to accept this newly customs and changed the social belief. In conclusion, compromise to the change or even opposition implies no shame but the wisdom and the endurance of an individual and of a society.

What should a person do-someone may ask, if he faces with contrast between firm belief or rapid shift? Unfortunately, no one knows. Although after the analysis in the earlier two paragraphs, it may remind people that the arbitrary and firm determination is unwise, we still have no idea how to make a "wisest" choice between them to reduce the "harm" to the greatest extent. It is impossible for anyone to make a choice for others, or to be made a choice by others. The best way solving this problem is based on one's own experience, logical analysis and feelings. Diversity of people may draw a different conclusion after analysis and make distinguished choices of the same thing.

Admittedly, going to extreme seems easier and more direct; while making choice is always confusing and difficult for people, since nobody could predict whether the choice is right or wrong until the result comes out. Yet it is more sophisticated for people to alter the different process due to the complicated conditions even if the results of these two may be the same.  

各位 留下建议希望也给评个分吧 不管是3分还是几分 说说看吧 偶快要考了~~
谢谢各位的说~~~

DriverEntryUID: 143979

总的来说不错。不过妇女工作这一段和全文不是很协调。前面是你自己（也就是个人）在坚持信仰，后面的妥协是谁和谁妥协呢？新青年向老的信仰妥协？但是你给的例子好象是社会在向新的习惯妥协。感觉和前面联系不是很紧密。

BTW：你最近看了不少文章啊，辛苦了。先祝考试成功！

imongUID: 140258

这篇文章没能写到5分，很可惜

用词上我不想多说。两个in the process完全是废词（当然，不构成绝对负面影响），两个TS里面的his/her我一直在纳闷为什么不用one's，made me depressed直接写depressed me. 等等

论点的话，基本上不知道第三body在说什么，第二body的后面犯了一个比较严重的错误：看看你的例子里面到底谁在compromise，individual还是society？第一段的话着重说了under certain circumstance adherence to one's belief 如何如何，但是我认为更加有必要强调it is more harmful to compromise，尤其考虑到你正在分circumstance说。

看看4分的判据

4        A 4 paper presents a competent analysis of the issue and demonstrates adequate control of the elements of writing.

A typical paper in this category

--develops a position on the issue with relevant reasons and/or examples
--is adequately organized
--expresses ideas clearly
--demonstrates adequate control of language but may lack sentence variety
--demonstrates control of the conventions of standard written English but may have some flaws

其实如果想写好一点拿到5分并不困难：首先你的论点和整体组织要想好，然后就是段内的例子。第二body的错误一定要改过来，第一第二body的重点要调整，第三body如果没什么话可说就删掉好了。我当时考试时候也是剩了8分钟的，不要放掉来之不易的时间，好好检查仔细了。

这篇文章可不是你原来的水平吧？好好反思一下。

so猫UID: 148633

努力努力努力啊~~~~~

poohUID: 146994

so猫：
我觉得你body1,2 写得不错，虽然body1的个人例子似乎占的篇幅过多了，body3让人confused, 结尾也有些vague， 我想是你的立场不好写，因为为什么人们有的时候妥协有的时候不妥协呢？你又引出另一个问题。

整体不错的，很规范，而且还写得这么快，又时间可以好好补充一下啊，加油阿mm,你应该得5分以上的

so猫UID: 148633

恩 明白了 惨了 连最不该犯的逻辑错误都犯了~~~
伤心伤心~~~~~~~
努力研究一下 反省一下~~~~~~~
谢谢楼上的所有人~~~~

ValentinerUID: 121676

原文
Issue35
"No matter what the siruation, it is more harmful to compromise one's beliefs than to adhere to them."

When facing with the serious situation that oppose to his belief, one has to make a choice between compromising with others and adhering to it. The speaker claimed that compromising would bring more harm rather than（这里用rather than好像有点不妥,在我印像中rather than 表示”不是……而是……“的意思，那你岂不是说不是坚持而是妥协带来更多害处？好像不通吧。） the action of adhering does. As far as I am concerned, the choice has to be under serious consideration before it is made according to the different situations.

Under some circumstances, adherence to his own belief is the best way to guide an individual out of troubles and chaos. Take myself as an instance. In the process of my preparation for GRE examinationGRE中的E就是examination的缩写，这里就不用examination了吧, the high standards for AW and the difficulty in memorizing huge amount of vocabulary made me depressed. Moreover, one of my friends quitted the test at the last moment in last October. The only thing that inspired me to carry on and stimulated me to study harder is my belief that I can succeed in this test so as to continue my further study. It may seem a bit unbelievable that confidence in oneself-only a psychological factor is among the reason to carry on an a "mission impossible". Yet for me, without the courage and stimulation from my belief I am not sure whether I can sit here to complete my AW test. From this point of view, the adherence to belief supplies with courage and bravery to people in despair while the compromise leads loss and giving up.最后一句很经典的说！

On the other hand, it is wise to choose compromise rather than arbitrary adherence when all things illustrated that his/her belief is no longer proper or correct. Belief, which has been long existed in many minds of people, to certain extent may contain something banal or overdue. As the society develops at such a rapid speed, the conflict between the newly-born perspectives and the old belief is occurring in any place, at any time. At this moment, the choice of compromise sounds reasonable and preferable. Back to decades of years ago, it was believed that women who intent to work outside were regarded as evil; however, with the process of Industrial Revolution, increasing population of women chose to go outside at the same time society had to compromise to accept this newly customs and changed the social belief. In conclusion, compromise to the change or even opposition implies no shame but the wisdom and the endurance of an individual and of a society.
怎么说呢，觉得这一段的例子有点跑，妇女出外工作，这个好像不能说是社会对其的一种妥协吧。这似乎就默认了整个社会是在歧视女性，而我记得在东方上课的时候，戈戈说ETS是对女权主义情有独钟的，万一它们看到你这个例子后，觉得不爽，那就有点不太妙了。

What should a person do-someone may ask, if he faces with contrast between firm belief or rapid shift? Unfortunately, no one knows. Although after the analysis in the earlier two paragraphs, it may remind people that the arbitrary and firm determination is unwise, we still have no idea how to make a "wisest" choice between them to reduce the "harm" to the greatest extent. It is impossible for anyone to make a choice for others, or to be made a choice by others 这个地方好像就不通，建议把made换成given好些. The best way solving this problem is based on one's own experience, logical analysis and feelings. Diversity of people may draw a different conclusion after analysis and make distinguished choices of the same thing.

Admittedly, going to extreme seems easier and more direct; while making choice is always confusing and difficult for people, since nobody could predict whether the choice is right or wrong until the result comes out. Yet it is more sophisticated for people to alter the different process due to the complicated conditions even if the results of these two may be the same.

我们这么熟了，就不跟你客气了。优点我就不说了，虽然还是很多呐：）我就说说我觉得不足的吧。正文部分第一段的个人例子不错，没什么好说的。第二段的例子就觉得有点跑，意见上面也有。看了imong的帖子之后，赞同他的观点。建议你要么改一下TS，要么把例子的针对性改一下，说清楚到底是谁在compromise.
第三段好像就是在各打15大板，到底要是要坚持还是妥协呢，你没有说。这样就让人觉得你的文章的立场不鲜明。其实我也明白你想表达的意思，如果换了我，我也会这么去思维。但写起来，总还是应该有个偏重点，不然就容易写成骑墙，模糊了你的观点。可以这么说，坚持自己信仰是成功所必备的，但在某种情况下却不得不做出一些小小的妥协。
除了上面这些，我就没什么意见了。羡慕你的vocabulary和sentence variety啊~~~~~

ValentinerUID: 121676

BTW，还想问一句，你写的时候是怎么分配时间的啊？我昨晚，确切的说，是今天凌晨，又一次限时失败了：（

dawnspeakerUID: 152586

能在37分钟内写完已经是一个很大的进步了，要知道最后一段时间的最大的任务就是压缩写作时间。
但是猫猫的速度加快（快猫加鞭）是在模板化的结果，而猫儿的模板的确有一些蓝妞说的缺点：过于“稳重”

这样有两个好处——使文章容易写，速度也加快了好多，因为辩证法适用于任何事情，什么issue都不需要特别的思考。另外一个好处是是文章四平八稳，没有什么vulnerable的地方。

但是，正如楼上几位已经拍过的一样，这种写法是有不少缺点的。我认为最大的缺点就是这样的话文章难以论及这个issue的关键，也难以表达出鲜明的信息——整个文章的“含金量”降低了。尤其是这种“分情况来说”的结构。
当然，对于newnew，这种写法还是入门的捷径，但是对于猫猫这种niuniu来说，应该表现出更高的水平才对。

so猫UID: 148633

恩 明白了 呵呵 昨天晚上睡太晚 早上的概统就又没上
body2 的例子我想了一下 改成了Christian的belief in God与科技发展对于上帝和天堂的证实达成妥协 是不是好一点点啦~~~
至于骑墙 哈 看太多范文了 反倒没学会走到开始狂跑 我还真没有想到这层问题~~

至于时间 这次快主要是快在前面的部分 开头和第一段加起来差不多10分钟的样子(我其实不是事先写出所有TS的 我一般打腹稿然后就直接写 因为自己总觉得这样文章会感觉比较顺)~~
一般情况下45分钟 我的能力是差不多开头5分钟 中间三段35分钟 结尾5分钟 现在还在想从哪里弄出5分钟检查错误~~

雪夭UID: 142334

猫猫你和我一样
真不知道哪里再搞个5分钟啊
这个还好，argument就更没什么五分钟了

dawnspeakerUID: 152586

大家不用太着急，我问过几个10g的朋友，他们都是说平常没有什么感觉的，考试的时候文思泉涌啊，大家都被逼的很快快的。
像偶这个样子是平常写懒懒散散没有时间检查的，考试的时候就有大量肾上腺激素，速度上去了，自然就有时间检查了。

不知道是不是有代表性。

apolloxpUID: 156355

楼上太夸张了吧，呵呵
腺激素能让你加快速度，不一定能提高质量