求批issue20 多谢

jjx111222UID: 2674499

20) Some people believe that college students should consider only their own talents and interests when choosing a field of study. Others believe that college students should base their choice of a field of study on the availability of jobs in that field.
Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own position and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should address both of the views presented.


How to choose a field of study is a problem that all the students have to encounter when they come to college. Some people claim that they should take their interests into account so they can enjoy themselves and it is more possible to make achievement. However, other people assert that if the field have little available, they would not choose it even they have talent in it.  I opine that both sides have a point and we should consider different solutions when we meet different conditions.

On the one hand, we can hardly do a solely thing well if we are not fond of it, only when we feel it interesting and would like to resolve it we can totally enjoy it. The best teacher is interested. Inventor Edison must love the invention first before think up electronic bulb. Only the enthusiasm of the career lead him to work thousands times to obtain the results. Let's think about Picasso, the famous painter, if his parents force him to study since him a child, we may loss a talent artist, which may be a miserable for all of mankind.

On the other hand, interest cannot give us broad and milk, we have to create wealth from our hands. From the perspective of reality, we have to feed ourselves first, nowadays we are responsible for not only just ourselves, but we also have to take care of our parents and children, and make them live happiness. All of these require us to have an available job, on this point, students choose a field of study that can give them splendid future is reasonable. Since students are not fully form their own view of the world when they come to college, and many of them cannot make sound judgement that which field is most suitable for them, sometimes they imagination they are fond of some field, but in fact they are not good at it, which may cause them make fault choose. So for insurance propose, many students choose a field which prospect widely to attain profits.

In sum, both two sides have their opinions, and we cannot distinguish the rights and wrong of this case. For myself, I opine that there are many fields in the world, we can choice one which is appropriate for us, and we can feed ourselves from the field, so we can achieve a balance between our material life and spiritual life.  

tbic2012UID: 3413195

How to choose a field of study is a problem that all the students have to encounter when they come to college. Some people claim that they should take their interests into account so they can enjoy themselves and it is more possible to make achievement. However, other people assert that if the field have little available, they would not choose it even they have talent in it.  I opine that both sides have a point and we should consider different solutions when we meet different conditions.

make achievement...?see WordReference

and is it wrong to say you made an achievement

On the one hand, we can hardly do a solely thing well if we are not fond of it, only when we feel it interesting and would like to resolve it we can totally enjoy it. The best teacher is interested. Inventor Edison must love the invention first before think up electronic bulb. Only the enthusiasm of the career lead him to work thousands times to obtain the results. Let's think about Picasso, the famous painter, if his parents force him to study since him a child, we may loss a talent artist, which may be a miserable for all of mankind.

solely is an adverb
'feel it interesting' sounds like chinglish
Edison again~
lead should be led
before thinking up (think up electronic bulb?? I guess it maybe "thinking up tungsten filament as the choice for his bulb")
enthusiasm for?
since him a child...

On the other hand, interest cannot give us broad and milk, we have to create wealth from our hands. From the perspective of reality, we have to feed ourselves first, nowadays we are responsible for not only just ourselves, but we also have to take care of our parents and children, and make them live happiness. All of these require us to have an available job, on this point, students choose a field of study that can give them splendid future is reasonable. Since students are not fully form their own view of the world when they come to college, and many of them cannot make sound judgement that which field is most suitable for them, sometimes they imagination they are fond of some field, but in fact they are not good at it, which may cause them make fault choose. So for insurance propose, many students choose a field which prospect widely to attain profits.

bread and milk
create wealth from our hands sounds like chinglish...
pay attention to comma, do not use it between sentences~
they imagination->they imagune

In sum, both two sides have their opinions, and we cannot distinguish the rights and wrong of this case. For myself, I opine that there are many fields in the world, we can choice one which is appropriate for us, and we can feed ourselves from the field, so we can achieve a balance between our material life and spiritual life.  

the structure is good though not complex
maybe it will be better to describe the examples you mentioned like how Picasso found out his own interest

If you disagree with me, please let me know~
Best wishes.

jjx111222UID: 2674499

tbic2012 发表于 2014-2-16 11:28
make achievement...?see WordReference

and is it wrong to say you made an achievement

太感谢了！没想到对我的作文作出这么细致的评论，回去一定好好修改一下