issue9 原稿+重写稿+海量修改稿

fishergirlUID??152325

我一时也想不到什么很好的表达，但是自己又总觉得交叉学科是个很好的论点，不想舍弃。

唉，再想想看啦……

dezhiUID??156141

举手：
我没有说交叉学科这个论点不好呀，呵呵

fishergirlUID??152325

我明白你的意思，只是还没有想出来如何把话说的更加清楚，更加圆满。

fishergirlUID??152325

比如，通过学科交叉，单个学科，单种思想的影响完成了由点到面的辐射？

dallowayUID??156640

It is obvious that academic disciplines have become highly specialized in recent years, which seems to mean （seem，mean有些重复）that scholars will pay more and more attention to their own field and lose many audience than before, and in consequence, their ideas will be less useful than expected. But in fact, specialization is not equal to isolation, it will not diminish the influence of scholars’ ideas and （their） research achievements, moreover, it can bring（改为infuse之类的词是否能形象些？） new vigor to the whole science circles.

First of all, there is no need for the public to understand the abstruse academic knowledge just for taking advantage of the academic outcomes. Take penicillin, one kind of most popular antibiotics, as an example,（把举例和具体描述拆成两句话吧。） it has saved millions of people’s life since（it was） found by Sir Alexander Fleming, notwithstanding its function mechanism and productive procedure is unfamiliar to the public. And also, we can enjoy TV programs without knowing how the little box is made up, chat with friends through internet disregarding why the information can be transmitted so quickly, drive cars wherever we want to go if only we know where the accelerator and brake lies. Accordingly, as an ordinary people, it is enough for him to know that there are many modern science and technology outcomes and then use them conveniently.
题目说得是scholar，第一段怎么变成很多ordinary people的举例了？不妨就照一个青霉素的点展开写写。
In addition, each specialized subject can amplify its influence to the whole academic circles and people’s lives through the interaction and communication with others. No idea can advance singly, hence many branches of learning interact with each other more and more thoroughly, which impels the development of many different realms of science and technology, and also the emerging of many new interdisciplinary subjects such as Bioinformatics, Biochemistry, Biophysics and so on.（前面加上，以生物学为例） These novelties bring new vim to the whole academic circles and lead to even more up-to-date ideas, and then push the development of both the whole science and technology and each single branch unceasingly. From this point, a single idea may reach only a narrow audience, but when it meets with other ideas and is integrated with others, its audience becomes wider and wider. （我想说：通过学科之间的交叉，单个学科，单个思想的影响被放大了。）

However, it is really need（词性） for some scholars to convey their ideas to the public in some certain fields. Take medical science as an example, if people have some simple knowledge of it, they may avoid many dispensable diseases, such as infection caused by bad health habits, myopia owing to excessively usage of eyes without proper rest, some pulmonary diseases as a result of smoking, and so on. Thus, in such fields, it is required for scholars to propagate their ideas to the public, by means of simplifying and universalizing their theories to the standard that can be accepted by ordinary people. Admittedly, the more abstruse the idea is, the narrower the audience it can reach, so the scholars have no choice but to simplify again and again.

All in a word, specialization is the （a或者one of） definite tendency of modern academic research, and the interaction of each branch of science and technology is surely another liability, thus every valuable idea can certainly be developed both in depth and width and accepted by more and more audience. It is unnecessary to worry about whether ideas can reach enough audience or not, not to mention their contribution to the society.

改过之后好多了。嗯，感觉你的定冠词用法有些问题，不过我也一样。
大致改了一下，语言很顺畅，观点很明确。继续加油！

dallowayUID??156640

最初由 genie05 发布
[B]复习考试，注意休息调整。心态最重要。 ;) [/B]

谢谢genie的关心，上周的事情真是冲击波一波又一波的，郁闷坏了，这周好多了。 :p

fishergirlUID??152325

谢谢dalloway，你的建议都很中肯，尤其是我在定冠词的使用上的确有些混乱。以前看英语的时候没有注意这些，所以现在自己写起来全凭感觉。

另外，我的提纲：

Body1：对于普通人，没有必要了解太过细致的专业知识也同样可以享受科技成果带来的便利。
Body2：学科的细化导致很多新的分支产生，同时也促进了分支间的交叉，这样尽管单一学科的领域表面看缩小了，但其对于整个学术界的影响却不会减小，甚至更大了。
Body3：作出一点让步，一些特定领域的知识还是有必要让人们了解。

不知道这样是不是不太严谨？

jermyUID??155463

帮忙看看我的好吗？

fishergirlUID??152325

好啊，互通有无嘛，你能把链接发给我吗？

feier521UID??109747

fishergirl 也很火嘛？
:)

fishergirlUID??152325

最初由 feier521 发布
[B]fishergirl 也很火嘛？
:) [/B]

最近写作文停滞不前，很上火啊 :D

feier521UID??109747

嗯，什么时候也帮你消消火？
:)

fishergirlUID??152325

呵呵，谢谢！

自己先消消火，然后重新来过。

现在每次拿到一个题目都只能写出一个开头，接下来就觉得脑子里很混乱……写了提纲也没用，总是写着写着就觉得思路不对，想推倒重来。所以这几天写了N个开头，却没有一篇完整的文章出来：（

唉，都怪自己以前积累太少了！

dallowayUID??156640

一样的。
我的目标就是4.5。郁闷也得写，要不怎么办呢？
作文这个东西不是很好提高的，想想中文不也一样？现在只是把思路整理一下，发现并力图避免以前的错误。
＋U！

fishergirlUID??152325

谢谢鼓励，一起加油：）