issue 1 (prepare for 207--13)

LSDUID: 157855

1、"We can usually learn much more from people whose views we share than from people whose views contradict our own; disagreement can cause stress and inhibit learning."

When referring to opposite ideas to our own, many people agree that they are hampers for the both sides learning, I conceded if the two sides' opinions are based on different background knowledge the debate between them maybe a waste of time while for other conditions, disagreement plays an important part in people's learning and progress.

Contrary opinions, in facts can help people take a serious consideration of his/her views and make better ones finally. For example, a local government discusses about whether they should permit an investor's recommendation to build a new factory in the city. Some officials agree the recommendation since they think the new factory will boost the economic development of the city and release the pressure of unemployment. To the contrary, others disagree with the plan in that they consider that although there maybe some benefits, the new factory will undoubtedly bring contamination. After several days discussion the government decide that they will agree the recommendation if the investor can make a clear plan for the solution of pollution, which is the best way to the problem. Hence, we can see that opponents’ ideas are important for ones grow and progress. If there is no disagreements, in the foregoing case, people who welcome the recommendation will not recognize the significance of environmental protection, and damage the city's benefits, similarly, for the other side also will not learn the necessary of industry evolution.

Moreover, people who hold the opposite opinions must the one who has thought over our own opinions and we therefore can learn much more from them than from people who share the same view with us. Best example is that in the realm of business, the most loyalty and enthusiastic staff is the one who is not cater the leader's opinion and gutty enough to bring forward his/her own assertion. As to the executives, opinions from these staffs are more advanced and helpful than those who just listen to their order or have the same ideas, since they can see their flaws and deficiencies clearly through the eyes of ordinary staffs and avoid making mistakes. More important, they can learn how to be an efficient leader and make as much profits as they can.

Admittedly, the opposite opinions which from people who share no common background with us are of no conspicuous significance. A student whose major is western medicine may not be able to get useful information from student who learns Chinese traditional medicine. The former is based his/her medical knowledge on anatomy and pathology while the latter's system of medicine is build up on the theory such as Wuxing and Yinyang so it is impossible for one to understood the treatment of the other and it is obviously that they also cannot learn from each other.

In sum, except the situation that we cannot learn from people who don't agree with us have no common knowledge or value system, we can find our own disadvantages and make progress with the help of people who has different ideas and suggestions.

欢迎拍砖与讨论！:p

bcomerUID: 182621

Admittedly, the opposite opinions which（are made） from people who share no common background with us are of no conspicuous significance. A student whose major is western medicine may not be able to get useful information from student who learns Chinese traditional medicine. The former is based his/her medical knowledge on anatomy and pathology while the latter's system of medicine is build up on the theory such as Wuxing and Yinyang so it is impossible for one to understood the treatment of the other and it is obviously that they also cannot learn from each other.


学习中……

全文流畅，似乎也只有一处不影响阅读的语法错误。

学习ing:)

LSDUID: 157855

谢谢！

fengboallanUID: 157405

文章写得真得不错，说实话，我要是ETS阅卷人就一定给你满分。唯一一点我个人人为你的例证for example那快的论证，我觉得用一些确凿的人或者事来说明或者更有说服力。或者，明确地事例。你的例证让人感觉是自己虚构出的场景，虚构出的现实。然后来证明自己的论点。可能说服力会差一些。说得不一定对，敬请原谅

LSDUID: 157855

楼上的过奖了
关于自己编的例子我觉得还是可以用的，因为每个人的知识有限，不可能对各个领域的真是存在都了如指掌阿，尤其是那些复杂的人名，地名。所以我想自己编还是一个好方法。
可参考一下老外280，那里面很多情况都是作者自己按照题目设想的。

haiyaUID: 187989

"We can usually learn much more from people whose views we share than from people whose views contradict our own; disagreement can cause stress and inhibit learning."

When referring to opposite ideas to our own, many people agree that they are hampers hamper for the both sides learning, I conceded if the two sides' opinions are based on different background knowledge the debate between them maybe a waste of time while for other conditions, disagreement plays an important part in people's learning and progress.开头把前提说清楚了，不错，要学习一下：）

Contrary opinions, in factsin fact, can help people take a serious consideration of his/her views and make better ones make ones betterfinally. For example, a local government discusses about whether they should permit an investor's recommendation to build a new factory in the city. Some officials agree the recommendation since they think the new factory will boost the economic development of the city and release the pressure of unemployment. To the contrary, others disagree with the plan in that they consider that although there maybe some benefits, the new factory will undoubtedly bring contamination. After several days‘s discussion the government decides that they will agree the recommendation if the investor can make a clear plan for the solution of pollution, which is the best way to the problem. Hence, we can see that opponents’ ideas are important for ones grow and progress. If there is no disagreements, in the foregoing case, people who welcome the recommendation will not recognize the significance of environmental protection, and damage the city's benefits, similarly, for the other side also will not learn the necessary of industry evolution. 这个例子，我觉得把government的角色拿掉会比较好，但说对于对立面的好处，感觉government在这里是个neutral的角色，并没有对本方有益

Moreover, people who hold the opposite opinions must the one who has thought over our own opinions and we therefore can learn much more from them than from people who share the same view with us. The是固定句式吗？不是的话最高级前要定冠一下哦Best example is that in the realm of business, the most loyalty and enthusiastic staffemployer, staff是集合名词 is the one who is not cater for/tothe leader's opinion and gutty enough to bring forward his/her own assertion. As to the executives, opinions from these staffs employers are more advanced and helpful than比较级主体不一致 those who just listen to their order or have the same ideas,逗号去掉 since they can see their flaws and deficiencies clearly through the eyes of ordinary common, ordinary好象更强调没有特殊才能的平凡 staffs employers and avoid making mistakes. More importantly, they can learn how to be an efficient leader and make as much profits as they can. 我觉得这个例子挺好的

Admittedly, the opposite opinions which comesfrom people who share no common background with us are of no conspicuous significance. A student whose major is western medicine may not be able to get useful information from student who learns Chinese traditional medicine. The former is based his/her medical knowledge on anatomy and pathology while the latter's system of medicine is build up on the theory such as Wuxing and Yinyang so it is impossible for one to understood the treatment of the other and it is obviously that they also cannot learn from each other.这个例子不好，现在很多都是中西药结合，有句广告是什么“中西药结合疗效好！”

In sum, except the situation that we cannot learn from people who don't agree with us have no common knowledge or value system, we can find our own disadvantages and make progress with the help of people who has different ideas and suggestions.结尾和开头差不多，最好改改，不要简单重复开头

LSDUID: 157855

谢谢haiya意见正在认真思考！

LSDUID: 157855

谢谢haiya的认真评改:p

[这个例子，我觉得把government的角色拿掉会比较好，但说对于对立面的好处，感觉government在这里是个neutral的角色，并没有对本方有益]
haiya的建议非常好，就政府工作人员本身来说的确不应该是想法这么简单的，肯定已经考虑到了建工厂的利和弊。我想，这个讨论如果发生在investor 和 environmentalist之间会更有说服力 。


[The是固定句式吗？不是的话最高级前要定冠一下哦Best example]
这个是我用错了，要加上定冠词。


[staff是集合名词]
这个改成employee


[cater for/to]
cater to 表示迎合某人，这个用法应该没错的。


[ordinary好象更强调没有特殊才能的平凡]
nod应该换成common


[这个例子不好，现在很多都是中西药结合，有句广告是什么“中西药结合疗效好！”]
呵呵，这个米国人可能不晓得di.

imongUID: 140258

稍微提醒一下 标题的"issue"和题号中间不要空格

^^

LSDUID: 157855

呵呵，对不住阿，发了这么多竟然犯这种错误！
下次一定改正！

LSDUID: 157855

大家砸阿！
欢迎讨论:p

dezhiUID: 156141

1、"We can usually learn much more from people whose views we share than from people whose views contradict our own; disagreement can cause stress and inhibit learning."

When referring to opposite ideas to our own, many people agree that they are hampers for the both sides learning[->both sides of learning，不过这里你想说什么呢？], I conceded if the two sides' opinions are based on different background knowledge the debate between them maybe[->may be] a waste of time while for other conditions, disagreement plays an important part in people's learning and progress.[ 首段有点罗嗦，句子太长，而且有问题：两套句子成份；我觉得把观点明确的摆出来就好]

Contrary opinions, in facts[->in fact放前面吧] can help people take a serious consideration of his/her views [take…into consideration OR in consideration of] and make better ones finally. For example, a local government discusses about whether they should permit an investor's recommendation to build a new factory in the city. Some officials agree [少介词] the recommendation since they think the new factory will boost the economic development of the city and release the pressure of unemployment. To the contrary, others disagree with the plan in that they consider that[这三个词可省] although there maybe[->may be] some benefits, the new factory will undoubtedly[工厂并未说明是什么工厂，这里就用这个词是不是太绝对了？] bring contamination. After several days [of] discussion the government decide that they will agree [decide to accept如何？简单一点更好] the recommendation if the investor can make a clear plan for the solution of pollution, which is the best way to the problem. Hence, we can see that opponents’ ideas are important for ones grow[->one’s growth] and progress. If there is no disagreements, in the foregoing case, people who welcome the recommendation will not recognize the significance of environmental protection, and damage the city's benefits, similarly, for the other side also will not learn the necessary[这是形容词啊] of industry evolution. [此段表达的观点很好，只是表达上有些罗嗦，而且有一些不该出现的错误]

Moreover, people who hold the opposite opinions must [be] the one who has thought over our own opinions and we therefore can learn much more from them than from people who share the same view with us. [The] Best example is that in the realm of business, the most loyalty[这里为啥用名词？] and enthusiastic staff is the one who is not cater [cater是动词，前面为什么用is?而且表示“迎合”，应该使用搭配“cater to”] the leader's opinion and gutty enough to bring forward his/her own assertion.[前面这个句子问题多多啊] As to the executives, opinions from these staffs are more advanced and helpful than those who just listen to their order or have the same ideas, since they can see their flaws and deficiencies clearly through the eyes of ordinary[这里为何说普通？能发表自己意见的人一定普通吗？说相同意见的就不普通？] staffs and avoid making mistakes. More important, they can learn how to be an efficient leader and make as much profits as they can. [此段观点也不错，只是分析不够，举例又表面化了]

Admittedly, the opposite opinions which[去掉] from people who share no common background with us are of no conspicuous significance. A student whose major is western medicine may not be able to get useful information from [a] student who learns Chinese traditional medicine. The former is based [->bases] his/her medical knowledge on anatomy and pathology while the latter's system of medicine is build[->built] up on the theory such as Wuxing and Yinyang so it is impossible for one to understood the treatment of the other and it is obviously[->obvious] that they also cannot learn from each other.

In sum, except the situation that we cannot learn from people who don't agree with us have no common knowledge or value system[这句还是有问题], we can find our own disadvantages and make progress with the help of people who has different ideas and suggestions.

LSDUID: 157855

谢谢dezhi斑竹，意见正在认真考虑:p

LSDUID: 157855

再次感谢斑竹认真仔细的修改！
词语运用下次一定注意！

dezhiUID: 156141

1、你对文章的把握很好，文章的整体结构也不错
2、开头段要把自己的观点明确的表达出来，你整个一大段只用了一句话，逻辑结构又不清晰，自然无法达到要求
Body1举例可以更具体一些，比如说自己家乡的政府如何如何，也可以增加可信度；注意举例时，即使是编的也要自圆其说才行。
Body2段末如果有时间总结一下就更好了。
Body3只是摆出了你的观点，然后举一个例子了事，我认为分析的还不透彻。
末尾段总结全文，还可以。
3、这篇文章语法方面的问题比较严重，不少句式错误、搭配用错、词性用错之处，我认为已经影响到了表达。注意，拿不准的词汇和搭配不要轻易使用。虽然打击了你一下，不过只要多加努力，肯定会提高很快的：）

楼主改了很多作文，相信你在改作文中也得到不少启发吧
继续努力：）