argument11(prepare for 207-3)

LSDUID: 157855

11．The following appeared in a memo from the mayor of the town of West Egg.

'Two years ago, our consultants predicted that West Egg's landfill, which is used for garbage disposal, would be completely filled within five years. During the past two years, however, town residents have been recycling twice as much aluminum and paper as they did in previous years. Next month the amount of material recycled should further increase, since charges for garbage pickup will double. Furthermore, over ninety percent of the respondents to a recent survey said that they would do more recycling in the future. Because of our residents' strong commitment to recycling, the available space in our landfill should last for considerably longer than predicted.'

20:27
Merely based on unfounded assumption and dubious evidence, the arguer predicts that the available space in West Egg should last for considerably longer than predicted. If we scrutinize prediction of the arguer, we will find that the arguer ignores certain important concerns which must be addressed to prove.

To begin with the arguer failed to indicate that the phenomenon of the recycling of these two years will last in the future, since the arguer has no strong evidence to support his assertion. It is entirely possible that next year the amount of paper and aluminum which can be recycled will not as large as this year, hence we should also pay attention to the capacity of the landfill. Moreover, the arguer only informs us the condition of paper and aluminum, and it is known to all that they can only stands for small parts of garbage and the arguer doesn't consider other wastes such as plastic, cloth, wood and so forth meanwhile the arguer doesn't tell us whether these garbage can or cannot be recycled, if not, we can see the weakness of the speaker's prediction.

Furthermore, the arguer failed to build up a causal relationship between the rise of garbage charge and the amount of material recycled. It is likely that people in the town have already recycled all what they can, so there will not be more material recycled even if the charge of garbage pickup will double. Hence, the arguer cannot base his/her prediction on the charge increasing. He/she should make a clear estimation about the amount of material which can also be recycled, without which we can hardly say there will be significant ascend of the amount of recycled material.

Last bit not least, the arguer rely his/her assertion on the survey, which in reality has two problems. First, we are not informed whether the respondents' opinion of the survey can represent all people's thoughts in West Egg. IF it is only a small sample, the conclusion derived from the survey may be scant. Secondly, we should doubt whether the survey obey the principle of random sampling, if not, the result of the survey is also unwarranted. Perhaps people who are willing to recycling also show great enthusiasm on the survey and response to it. Lacking the foregoing information of the survey, we can hardly believe it result and meanwhile the arguer's prediction is just like an air castle.

In sum, although the argument seems acceptable, in fact, it is neither pervasive nor persuasive. To strengthen the argument, the arguer must provide more evidence to indicate that there are still potential of recycling in West Egg, meanwhile adding more information to boost the credibility of the survey.

LSDUID: 157855

ding
:p

冥界星灿UID: 184746

快占座啊！给我抢到了，哈哈

冥界星灿UID: 184746

11．The following appeared in a memo from the mayor of the town of West Egg.

'Two years ago, our consultants predicted that West Egg's landfill, which is used for garbage disposal, would be completely filled within five years. During the past two years, however, town residents have been recycling twice as much aluminum and paper as they did in previous years. Next month the amount of material recycled should further increase, since charges for garbage pickup will double. Furthermore, over ninety percent of the respondents to a recent survey said that they would do more recycling in the future. Because of our residents' strong commitment to recycling, the available space in our landfill should last for considerably longer than predicted.'

20:27
Merely based on unfounded assumption and dubious evidence, the arguer predicts that the available space in West Egg should last for considerably longer than predicted. If we scrutinize prediction of the arguer, we will find that the arguer ignores certain important concerns which must be addressed to prove.真的觉得你的开头模板做的非常漂亮

To begin with the arguer failed to indicate that the phenomenon of the recycling of these two years will last in the future, since the arguer has no strong evidence to support his assertion这里的his assertion好像有点指带不明？是不是想打this assertion?. It is entirely possible that next year the amount of paper and aluminum which can be recycled will not as large as this year, hence we should also pay attention to the capacity of the landfill. Moreover, the arguer only informs us the condition of paper and aluminum, and it is known to all that they can only stands for small parts of garbage and the arguer doesn't consider other wastes such as plastic, cloth, wood and so forth meanwhile the arguer doesn't tell us whether these garbage can or cannot be recycled, if not, we can see the weakness of the speaker's prediction.这句话好长，我看不懂了

Furthermore, the arguer failed to build up a causal relationship between the rise of garbage charge and the amount of material recycled. It is likely that people in the town have already recycled all what they can, so there will not be more material recycled even if the charge of garbage pickup will double. Hence, the arguer cannot base his/her prediction on the charge increasing. He/she should make a clear estimation about the amount of material which can also be recycled, without which we can hardly say there will be significant ascend of the amount of recycled material.

Last bitbut not least, the arguer rely his/her assertion on the survey, which in reality has two problems. First, we are not informed whether the respondents' opinion of the survey can represent all people's thoughts in West Egg. IFIf it is only a small sample, the conclusion derived from the survey may be scant. Secondly, we should doubt whether the survey obey the principle of random sampling, if not, the result of the survey is also unwarranted. Perhaps people who are willing to recycling also这个also好像有点怪 show great enthusiasm on the survey and response to it.这个perhaps引起的内容与second分论点不搭调，就算是随机取样也会有respond 的问题，应该单列为third.楼主认为？ Lacking the foregoing information of the survey, we can hardly believe itits? result and meanwhile the arguer's prediction is just like an air castle.

In sum, although the argument seems acceptable, in fact, it is neither pervasive nor persuasive^_^. To strengthen the argument, the arguer must provide more evidence to indicate that there are still potential of recycling in West Egg, meanwhile adding more information to boost the credibility of the survey.

20min,pfpf!

给你改好像总和没改一样，改不出来什么。很难改，只好不断鸡蛋里挑骨头，也不知说对了多少。

考试时打字要小心，回头检查一下，反正你速度快。开头结尾段首最好不要错，扎眼

好像你很爱用meanwhile?一路看了好多

是不是BODY1、2互换一下位置？先说survey不一定成立，再说即使现在成立，未来也不一定成立是不是好一点？不过这是小问题，有点挑刺了，不一定有必要

不错了，楼主好好调整吧

LSDUID: 157855

谢谢楼上，这篇写了35分钟
意见正在认真思考：）

teachercaomingUID: 152124

补充一下，
To begin with the arguer failed to indicate that the phenomenon of the recycling of these two years will last in the future, since the arguer has no strong evidence to support his assertion，
to begin with 要用逗号
In sum， 这个表达法有问题，我的英语老师觉得是不对的，in summary

LSDUID: 157855

谢谢楼上：）
看到老外280里面很多都是这么用的，所以就没有考究它的正确性了