Issue15 :谁能给我改作文? 欢迎砖头

gre_awUID: 194715

------题目------
15．The stability of a society depends on how it responds to the extremes of human behavior.

In the process of the formation of a society, extremes of human behavior exist everywhere. As the title states, the stability of a society often depends on its response to these behaviors. At the same time human behaviors can reflect the environment of the society in a facet.

We can learn it from the history of the societies all around the world. I will take Tang Dynasty in China for example. The society in that dynasty is one of the most stable society in China's history. People could be free to trade and chat around their habitats, they were working hard to grow crops, do some handcrafts and they never committed crimes or made the society in a mess. When it came to the end of the period, the society could hardly control the situation of strikes and crimes and it became unstable. In the end, the whole dynasty was replaced by the Song Dynasty.

We can analyze the extremes of human behavior in many ways. First, the direct cause of the extremes of human behavior is that they lead a miserable life, they can hardly tolerate with this kind of life and finally radical activities take place under the direction of these people in the lower class. Second, the indirect cause of the extreme behaviors can be summed up to the disorder of the internal dynasty. They autocrat of the country may impose heavy taxes on its citizens or get rid of people's fortune to maintain their extravagant life. Discontent of the citizens adds up to the development of the armed forces in the dark, the forces can threaten the existence of the emperor of the dynasty.

How to cope with the extreme behavior is a difficult question to the rulers. The actions can affect their dominance in the country. One way to cope with these social crisis is suppressing, this is effective in the short run but they will bring the negative effect in the long run. They may use their special tools such as army forces and prisons to suppress the activities, as a result, people may give up their extreme behaviors temporarily, but this kind of behavior can be stored among the people. Once they are activated, the forces may be stronger enough to overturn the present society.

Another way of responding to such problems is to hold the constructive communication with the opponents. This means that the ruler should be broad-minded and they may lose some interest in order to keep the society in a stable status and maintain their rules over the country. Under specific circumstance, they need to compromise with the other side. However, this may be a effective way for them to win the trust and the candid of their citizens.

In conclusion, the stability depends on the response of the ruler and government. Much can be done to continue their rules over the country such as holding friendly talks, compromising to the counters and so on. To get the support of the people and the internal groups, all that are of great help can be utilized to turn over the situation.

圣光UID: 193720

15．The stability of a society depends on how it responds to the extremes of human behavior.

In the process of the formation of a society, extremes of human behavior exist everywhere. As the title states, the stability of a society often depends on its response to these behaviors. [At the same time human behaviors can reflect the environment of the society in a facet.][这个观点下文有支撑点么？]

We can learn it[是什么？] from the history of the societies all around the world. I will take Tang Dynasty in China for example. The society in that dynasty is one of the most stable society in China's history. People could be free to trade and chat around their habitats, they were working hard to grow crops, do some handcrafts and they never committed crimes or made the society in a mess. When it came to the end of the period, the society could hardly control the situation of strikes and crimes and it became unstable. In the end, the whole dynasty was replaced by the Song Dynasty.

We can analyze the extremes of human behavior in many ways. First, the direct cause of the extremes of human behavior is that they lead a miserable life, they can hardly tolerate [with][好象tolerate是及物动词吧？] this kind of life and finally radical activities take place under the direction of these people in the lower class. Second, the indirect cause of the extreme behaviors can be summed up to the disorder of the internal dynasty. [They] autocrat of the country may impose heavy taxes on its citizens or get rid of people's fortune to maintain their extravagant life. Discontent of the citizens adds up to the development of the armed forces in the dark, the forces can threaten the existence of the emperor of the dynasty.

How to cope with the extreme behavior is a difficult question to the rulers. The actions can affect their dominance in the country. One way to cope with these social crisis is suppressing, [this][which] is effective in the short run but [they][去掉] will bring the negative effect in the long run. They may use their special tools such as army forces and prisons to suppress the activities, as a result, people may give up their extreme behaviors temporarily, but this kind of behavior can be stored among the people. Once they are activated, the forces may be stronger enough to overturn the present society.

Another way of responding to such problems is to hold the constructive communication with the opponents. This means that the ruler should be broad-minded and they may lose some interest in order to keep the society in a stable status and maintain their rules over the country. Under specific circumstance, they need to compromise with the other side. However, this may be a effective way for them to win the trust and the candid of their citizens.

In conclusion, the stability depends on the response of the ruler and government. Much can be done to continue their rules over the country such as holding friendly talks, compromising to the counters and so on. To get the support of the people and the internal groups, all that are of great help can be utilized to turn over the situation.
[这篇文章好象很难写的，我现在还是没有什么思路。不过觉得楼主的结构有点问题吧。
楼主第一段是写赞成题目观点
B1写的是唐朝的例子来支撑。
B2是分析激进行为的形成原因
B3，4是写社会对于激进行为的两种反应方式：一种是镇压，一种是纳谏和疏导。
觉得楼主的论证层次感不是很强，逻辑性也有欠缺。

以上纯属个人观点，欢迎讨论，欢迎回拍。]

binburuUID: 193418

我认为第一段在全文的结构中应起到总述的作用，但此文没有。而且有点思维混乱。

gre_awUID: 194715

感谢圣光和binburu的建议, 我会针对来修改的.
但只有10余天就考了,还没底.