issue136 机经高频，大家指点一下吧

ouenoUID: 194212

------题目------
The absence of choice is a circumstance that is very, very rare.
------正文------
Is choice a rare circumstance? According to the speaker, the absence of choice is a rare circumstance.  However, as far as I am concerned, the statement oversimplifies the issue of choice.

On one hand, in the economy realm, the development of technology provides us more choices for consumption. This change can be seen in most fields in social life. In education world, digital techniques make it possible to study on Internet and television, which is more economic and efficient than traditional study at schools and allows people to enjoy more freedom. In arts   world, painting is no longer the patent of the talented. With painting tools in modern computer, everyone can create good works of his own.  In business world, new technology brings about new methods of making deals, for example, by e-business, which enable individuals to make deal with people in every parts of the world by Internet. In fact, new technology affects almost every parts of our life and renders regular things extraordinary for people due to various means.

On the other hand, when it comes to culture, the globalization does decrease the diversity of culture in the world. The increasing communication in economy between nations also results in the crash of different cultures and the appearance of new culture which assimilates the features of  the origin one. This kind of crash is especially typical in United States: many immigrates from other countries also bring their cultures and value systems to the country, which is changing the way of thinking and value of native Americans.  For example, most native Americans are Christian and are strongly against abortion, however, in recent years hospitals in American claimed to have done more operations on abortion than any time in history. And with more foreign scientists working in America, the stubborn thought that cloning of Human being should be severely banned because embryo is also a life may appear to be ridiculous someday. The compromise and comfort in culture are not good for the self development of human beings since we are threatened with the loss of traditional culture, which is an invaluable legacy of our ancestors. Loss of traditional cultures probably means the oblivion of history and retreat in humanities, as a result, evil, crime, intrigue, even wars may flood the world and trust, cooperation, help may wholly disappear, with human ending up in mental poverty.

Finally, the people in developed country are usually provided more choices in most fields, politics, religion, science, arts etc. than people in developing country. As Adam Smith has pointed out in ‘the wealth of the country’, the accumulation of fortune appeals sharp-sighted traders, elites to gather and form a competitive market, which maximum the wealth of the country.  For instance, European have more abundant supply of necessities than Asian though they have less resources ; British hold more diversified religious belief than Chinese in spite of its smaller population; Frances own more art schools than Japan despite its shorter history. As these facts show: the wealthier the country, the more advanced and diversified the country.

In sum, there are also many other facts about the complexity of choice. However, unfortunately, I have no time to analyze them. But the above reasons are sufficient to show the truth of choice: modern people are faced with more choices in substances while less in cultures which may lead to rich in materials and poor in mental.

ouenoUID: 194212

自顶！

louchen1984UID: 172975

Is choice [absence of choice?]a rare circumstance?[和后面重复了] According to the speaker, the absence of choice is a rare circumstance. However, as far as I am concerned, the statement oversimplifies the issue of choice.

On one hand, in the economy[economic] realm, the development of technology [还是说free market贴切]provides us [with]more choices for consumption. This change can be seen in most fields in social life. [这句话没什么用，最好能具体说说]In education world, digital techniques make it possible to study on Internet and television, which is more economic and efficient than traditional study at schools and allows people to enjoy more freedom. In arts world, painting is no longer the patent of the talented. With painting tools in modern computer, everyone can create good works of his own. In business world, new technology brings about new methods of making deals, for example, by e-business, which enable individuals to make deal with people in every parts of the world by Internet. In fact, new technology affects almost every parts of our life and renders regular things extraordinary [??反了吧？]for people due to various means.

On the other hand, when it comes to culture, the globalization does decrease[weaken] the diversity of culture in the world. The increasing communication in economy between nations also results in the crash of different cultures and the appearance of new culture which assimilates the features of the origin one. This kind of crash is especially typical in United States: many immigrates from other countries also bring their cultures and value systems to the country, which is changing the way of thinking and value of native Americans. For example, most native Americans are Christian and are strongly against abortion, however, in recent years hospitals in American claimed to have done more operations on abortion than any time in history. And with more foreign scientists working in America, the stubborn thought that cloning of Human being should be severely banned because embryo is also a life may appear to be ridiculous someday. The compromise and comfort in culture are not good for the self development of human beings since we are threatened with the loss of traditional culture, which is an invaluable legacy of our ancestors. Loss of traditional cultures probably means the oblivion of history and retreat in humanities, as a result, evil, crime, intrigue, even wars may flood the world and trust, cooperation, help may wholly disappear, with human ending up in mental poverty.【这段明显跑题了，文化的同化以及它的好处和坏处与人们做出choice有什么关系？】

Finally, the people in developed country are usually provided more choices in most fields, politics, religion, science, arts etc. than people in developing country. As Adam Smith has pointed out in ‘the wealth of the country’, the accumulation of fortune appeals sharp-sighted traders, elites to gather and form a competitive market, which maximum the wealth of the country. For instance, European have more abundant supply of necessities than Asian though they have less resources ; British hold more diversified religious belief than Chinese in spite of its smaller population; Frances own more art schools than Japan despite its shorter history. As these facts show: the wealthier the country, the more advanced and diversified the country.【这样的比较有意义吗？】

In sum, there are also many other facts about the complexity of choice. However, unfortunately, I have no time to analyze them.【呵呵】 But the above reasons are sufficient to show the truth of choice: modern people are faced with more choices in substances while less in cultures which may lead to rich in materials and poor in mental.【我觉得choice更多的是指心理活动作出的或者是主观意识做出的有条件的有范围的选择，而不是单指文化，消费方面的多样性和可选择性，我不知道你这样写可不可以，个人以为有些离题了, btw】

加油！还有四天了

haiyaUID: 187989

------题目------
The absence of choice is a circumstance that is very, very rare.
------正文------
Is choice a rare circumstance? According to the speaker, the absence of choice is a rare circumstance. However, as far as I am concerned, the statement oversimplifies the issue of choice.

On one hand, in the economy realm, the development of technology provides us more choices for consumption. This change can be seen in most fields in social life. In education world, digital techniques make it possible to study on Internet and television, which is more economic and efficient than traditional study at schools and allows people to enjoy more freedom. In arts world, painting is no longer the patent of the talented. With painting tools in modern computer, everyone can create good works of his own. In business world, new technology brings about new methods of making deals, for example, by e-business, which enable individuals to make deal with people in every parts of the world by Internet. In fact, new technology affects almost every parts of our life and renders regular things extraordinary for people due to various means.主题句最好放在开头，你是想说各个领域的发展是选择越来越多，是这样的吗？那么这个句子还表达得太晦涩了。

On the other hand, when it comes to culture,culture和上面说的诸多领域没有表现出事物的两面性。用the other hand不合适the globalization does decrease the diversity of culture in the world. The increasing communication in economy between nations also results in the crash of different cultures and the appearance of new culture which assimilates the features of the origin one. This kind of crash is especially typical in United States: many immigrates from other countries also bring their cultures and value systems to the country, which is changing the way of thinking and value of native Americans. For example, most native Americans are Christian and are strongly against abortion, however, in recent years hospitals in American claimed to have done more operations on abortion than any time in history. And with more foreign scientists working in America, the stubborn thought that cloning of Human being should be severely banned because embryo is also a life may appear to be ridiculous someday. The compromise and comfort in culture are not good for the self development of human beings since we are threatened with the loss of traditional culture, which is an invaluable legacy of our ancestors. Loss of traditional cultures probably means the oblivion of history and retreat in humanities, as a result, evil, crime, intrigue, even wars may flood the world and trust, cooperation, help may wholly disappear, with human ending up in mental poverty.

Finally, the people in developed 为什么单独拿这个领域，与前面看不出是并列关系country are usually provided more choices in most fields, politics, religion, science, arts etc. than people in developing country. As Adam Smith has pointed out in ‘the wealth of the country’, the accumulation of fortune appeals sharp-sighted traders, elites to gather and form a competitive market, which maximum the wealth of the country. For instance, European have more abundant supply of necessities than Asian though they have less resources ; British hold more diversified religious belief than Chinese in spite of its smaller population; Frances own more art schools than Japan despite its shorter history. As these facts show: the wealthier the country, the more advanced and diversified the country.

In sum, there are also many other facts about the complexity of choice. However, unfortunately, I have no time to analyze them. But the above reasons are sufficient to show the truth of choice: modern people are faced with more choices in substances while less in cultures which may lead to rich in materials and poor in mental.
感觉这篇文章跟题目的关系不大，只是在结尾时我才看明白原来你想说选择多多。但是选择很多并不能证明没有选择的情况少。三个段落的关系用的词汇也不好，而且选的论证点也不合适。感觉三段前面两个虽然ts把他们分开了，但内容上却不是泾渭分明。而第三段又突然冒出来，显得突兀。
例子倒是很多的，呵呵。 你在看看别人的文章。多挖掘一下题目的意思。

ouenoUID: 194212

to louchen谢谢你的建议,
我先说一下我的思路吧:
1技术发展提供给人更多的选择机会
2文化冲击使人们在精神世界的选择机会减少
3同时发达国家的人比发展中国家的人有更多选择机会

这个提纲是参考了孙远的, louchen认为完全跑题了吗 :(
我看过从心理角度写的范文, 但那涉及哲学领域, 我觉得那个角度我可能不行
我自己感觉大概第一第二段还好,第三段有点突兀, 想个好点的方法衔接一下你看会怎样?
我改好再帖吧


把握最后的4天,希望能创造奇迹! 一起加油

ouenoUID: 194212

to haiya :
谢谢你的意见
大家都认为跑题了呀

我的提纲在上一帖

coherence是要好好改一下, 主题句大概是因为我表述不清, 所以你才会到断末才看懂的, 用词得改改了

看了你的issue觉得差距很大呀 :(

ouenoUID: 194212

I agree with the statement that the absence of choice is a rare circumstance in modern society because with the development of economy, people have more access to make choices. Besides, in culture field, although people are not left with absolutely no choice, they are faced with less choices due globalization.

On one hand, economy and technology progress has greatly contributed to people’s freedom of choice in terms of consumption. For example, in education world, digital techniques make it possible to study on Internet and television, which is more economic and efficient than traditional study at schools and allows people to enjoy more freedom. In arts realm, painting is no longer the patent of the talented. With painting tools in modern computer, everyone can create good works of his own.  In business world, new technology brings about new methods of making deals, for example, by e-business, which enable individuals to make deal with people in every parts of the world by Internet. In fact, new technology affects almost every parts of our life and renders regular things extraordinary for people due to various means.

On the other hand, culturally speaking, diversity is disappearing due to the trend of globalization. The increasing connection in economy between nations also results in the crash of different cultures and the appearance of global culture, a culture diminished of culturally differences and owning only common value systems. This culture is especially typical in United States: many immigrates from other countries bring their traditional cultures and value systems to the culture of the country, which is changing the way of thinking and value of native Americans. For example, most native Americans are Christian and are strongly against abortion, however, in recent years hospitals in American claimed to have done more operations on abortion than any time in history. And with more foreign scientists working in America, the stubborn thought that the application of stem cell in disease treatment should be severely banned because embryo is also a life may appear to be ridiculous someday. The compromise and conform in culture are not good for the self development of human beings since we are threatened with the loss of traditional culture, which is an invaluable legacy of our ancestors. Loss of traditional cultures probably means the oblivion of history and retreat in humanities, as a result, evil, crime, intrigue, even wars may flood the world and trust, cooperation, help may wholly disappear, with human ending up in mental poverty.

Another phenomenon worth pointing out is that people in developed countries enjoy more freedom of choice- politically, materially or spiritually- than people in developing country. As Adam Smith has pointed out in ‘the wealth of the country’, the accumulation of fortune appeals sharp-sighted traders, elites to gather and form a competitive market, which maximum the wealth of the country.  For instance, European have more abundant supply of necessities than Asian though they have less resources ; British hold more diversified religious belief than Chinese in spite of its smaller population; Frances own more art schools than Japan despite its shorter history. As these facts show: the wealthier the country, the more advanced and diversified the country.

In sum, despite the fact that we have less choices in some fields in our life because of advancement, the circumstance that we absolutely have no choices is very rare, and we should also recognize that development provides us more choices in other fields at the same time.


haiya: 我把1,2段的ts改了一下,表述得好象清楚一些, 那样的话可以说是有两面性了吗?
on one hand , on the other hand 是否可以用了?