1月7日，1T作文第七期同主题写作

逆风飞羊UID: 182440

前两个正文段落太简单了，应该把重要精力放在这两段，第三个略说就可以了。你正好相反。
总的来说还是不错的，时间也达到要求了 检查的事情因人而异吧，不过要把全文读一遍，时间不允许的话也不必强求。认真地看，看一句是一句，能找出一个错误也比草草地胡乱看一遍要强。

逆风飞羊UID: 182440

字数少了一点 不过现在当务之急是时间。在规定时间里写好一篇完整的作文，也是值得鼓励的呀。
多加一点例子会使你的作文更充实。但是你在B2里举的例子让人不太明白你的用意。想说自己呢还是说你的合作伙伴呢？说自己的话你在这里又想说明什么问题呢？没有体现清楚。

WeOnUID: 2110447

原帖由 逆风飞羊 于 2006-1-10 15:54 发表
前两个正文段落太简单了，应该把重要精力放在这两段，第三个略说就可以了。你正好相反。
总的来说还是不错的，时间也达到要求了 检查的事情因人而异吧，不过要把全文读一遍，时间不允许的话也不必强求。认真地看 ...

因为看写过有关a sense of humor的文章，所以，这个写起来比较顺手就写的多了些。我会多注意一些论据的充实的，多看些范文

AdiUID: 2114222

In our jobs, we will work with many different kinds of people: someone is intelligent, someone is honest and someone may make us feel awful. As far as I am concerned, I would like to work with a person who is intelligent, reliable and has a sense of humor.

An intelligent co-worker will make the difficulty easily solved. In our work, we will face a variety of difficulties that are hard to be solved. We will need an intelligent worker who always can(是can always吧?) light up out minds and make a sound decision. And this will save much time and money, which can make our group always on the top.

Also, a co-worker who is reliable is what we need. As we know, we are a group and we need to cooperate with each other to achieve a goal. When faced(facing) with problems, we will rely on each other. Hence, a co-worker who is reliable is just the one worth depending on and believing in.

Last but not least, the important characteristic of a co-worker is a sense of humor, which can be a pacifier and stimulus in our jobs. Sometimes we will have different ideas about the same problem. And neither of us will back off. At the edge of quarrelling or even fighting, a sense of humor of him can pacify this tense atmosphere and make us calm down to think of the problem carefully. Sometimes when we face a very big problem that is too hard to settle, his/her sense of humor can give us new energy and stimulate us to overcome it.
I
In a word, in our jobs, we will face with various difficulties and work with many different kinds of people. To solve these difficulties and always make our team on the top, a co-worker who is intelligent, reliable and has a sense of humor is just the one I would like to work with.

比我写的好的多,我都没资格改你的.
象斑竹说的那样, 你最好把写的好的一段放到主体的第一段哈
词汇用的很好,但可以在多用点句型,到装啊,强调啊

逆风飞羊UID: 182440

B1前半段说的不错 可是后面Moreover的内容~~个人认为立意有点不高啊~~~不过内容方面的事情倒是在其次，只要说的有道理就行 只是个人感觉。

另外可能你在写的时候没有仔细想题目。题目问的是你喜欢什么样的同事。可是你在B1中说老板喜欢什么样的人，B2中又说我们应该做什么样的人，这样并不符合题目的要求。
其实你写的并不像你自己所说的那么糟糕啦，和其他人一样，注意加入例子，多看看范文和其他好句子来提高现场写作时的文字水平。
现在对你来说最重要的是时间。写不完，再好的文字也是白搭。只要在规定时间里写完了，结果不会太差。我的一个学弟考的10T，考试时是他的作文处子秀，英语水平也不高，稀里糊涂写完了，居然得了4分。呵呵

tianxin_txUID: 2148617

首先声明我也是个新手，所以有什么不当之出还请指正。
Faced the mess caused by a new worker without experience , a good co-worker would be patient to explain to him how to avoid the same problem next time and comfort him to release him form the disappointment rather than get angry and blame him .
faced是不是应该改为facing,因为从句的主语跟主句的主语是主动关系嘛，还有这句话的主句中好多him哦,总的来说让人读起来有点晕