【挑战0706G版主义务修改铺】内有大量斑竹修改过的文章，大家可以参考。

yogurt4UID: 198389

原帖由 ostrich1986 于 2006-12-20 08:00 发表
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... &extra=page%3D1

能不能帮我也改一下呢?不胜感激 谢谢谢谢~~~~~~~~~水平不高 辛苦各位了~

地址有问题.再给一次.

ostrich1986UID: 2238177

https://bbs.gter.net/thread-581922-1-1.html
这篇没人改呢?斑竹大人给看看吧 谢谢~~~~~~~~~~~

[ 本帖最后由 ostrich1986 于 2006-12-22 14:01 编辑 ]

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ntmlgszUID: 2235666

原帖由 作文版全体版主 于 2006-12-20 20:36 发表
12月20日 ntmlgsz http://bbs.gter.ce.cn/bbs/viewth ... e%3D1#pid1769442414

我没有报上来，是谁主动改的我的啊？？~非常感谢的说~ 4酸奶吗？

ntmlgszUID: 2235666

原帖由 ostrich1986 于 2006-12-21 08:49 发表
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-581922-1-1.html
这篇没人改呢?斑竹大人给看看吧 谢谢~~~~~~~~~~~

~~我空闲时帮忙改了~~能力有限~~改的不好的地方请见谅
不知道这里不是斑竹的能不能参与改改~~~不能的话可以删偶的帖子都可以
PS：已经PM你了


[ 本帖最后由 ntmlgsz 于 2006-12-23 17:22 编辑 ]

yogurt4UID: 198389

原帖由 ntmlgsz 于 2006-12-23 17:21 发表



~~我空闲时帮忙改了~~能力有限~~改的不好的地方请见谅
不知道这里不是斑竹的能不能参与改改~~~不能的话可以删偶的帖子都可以
PS：已经PM你了

可以的可以的，欢迎编外版主帮忙^^

norman518UID: 188582

各位版主：
    感谢你们上次的义务改作文（1206）。
    这2周没有看Imong的系列主题，而是认真写了几篇ETS的文章，希望你们侃侃！

Issue185：  https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... e%3D1#pid1769459185

一次只能修改一篇吗？那希望那位版主再有闲情的、不影响休息的情况想帮忙侃侃A（一个月每写，感觉手好生疏）

Argument051：   https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... e%3D1#pid1769459189

谢谢你们的热心！
                              sincerely
                                   Norman

yogurt4UID: 198389

我说一下ls的，你不要在意。
我搜索了一下你的帖子，给别人看过作文，不过实在是不多哈。
此外，在别人的帖子里留下自己习作链接之前，先帮别人看作文才比较自然吧。

afgxUID: 2185359

爬起来，牙也没刷，刚要贴，才发现今天是周日……
Anyway, 祝各位斑竹以及寄托战友圣诞快乐~~~大家今天好好Happy!

ntmlgszUID: 2235666

原帖由 norman518 于 2006-12-24 04:51 发表
各位版主：
    感谢你们上次的义务改作文（1206）。
    这2周没有看Imong的系列主题，而是认真写了几篇ETS的文章，希望你们侃侃！

Issue185：  https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=583665& ...

以后把链接留在这里就可以了，不要专门PM偶，你的ARGUMENT已经改了，ISSUE没时间看--你们组会有人看的

原帖由 yogurt4 于 2006-12-24 05:08 发表
我说一下ls的，你不要在意。
我搜索了一下你的帖子，给别人看过作文，不过实在是不多哈。
此外，在别人的帖子里留下自己习作链接之前，先帮别人看作文才比较自然吧。

酸奶大MM说的有道理~~要向酸奶同志学习

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nostrumUID: 2124189

我们都要铭记酸奶老大的教导才是

66666UID: 2281804

:handshake :handshake TOPIC: ISSUE221 - "The chief benefit of the study of history is to break down the illusion that people in one period of time are significantly different from people who lived at any other time in history."
WORDS: 531          TIME: 0:45:00          DATE: 2006-12-24

Is the principal value of studying history is in recognizing that people in one period of time  dramatically  differ from people in another time of history, as the speaker contends? While the statement holds its value, we must recognize that in some cases people in diverse periods share the same basic value and human nature. In my observation, I agree with the speaker that in some aspects people in one period are quite dissimilar with those in another period. On such balance, we could probably value  the true sense of human history.

History tell us time and time again that certain aspects of human nature cannot
change easily throughout the human history, such as wars, violence and poverty, for the reason that they stem from some aspects  of human nature---for instance, greedy and aggression. Take example of the occupy of territory: the violent occupying territory of Roman Empire, fuels the attempted occupy of whole Europe by Hitler, the attempted occupy of Russia by Napoleon, and the attempted occupy of Afghanistan by other countries. These examples illustrate that history is full of cases that all human being sharing the same human characters. Modern people need not go very far to see the compelling fact that the violent territory occupy is nothing new.

Nevertheless, history also inform us that even in the same period of time in history, one culture in a place is quite different from another one in another place.  A simple example aptly illustrate the point of view is that one feel discomfort involving the traffic  arrangement in London where it is absolutely  different from that in the USA. In London one drives in the left of the road while in the right of the road. When one get off the bus, his or her habit is to look right, but now he or she may feel annoyed, even dangerous!! For the matter,
we must realize  that the definite differences in various aspects of culture indeed exist although we all the time share some similar nature and principle
values.

In addition, the principle value of the study of history is to help us understand and appreciate the mores, values and lessons from our ancestors. By understanding the evolution of money and banking system we can review the  complex process of  human progress in terms of trade and exchange, a visit to a grocery store to appreciate the homage of the inventors, engineers and scientists. By studying the whole life of some famous people students can prepare themselves for certain excellent values such as persistence and enduring and also recognize how to allote the time and energy in terms of  academic study.

In the final analysis, history renders human being numerous mores, values and lessons, which is conductive in the development of  human endeavor.
However, on one hand we should make clear that certain aspects of history evolution remain same throughout human history. On the other hand human kind are making progresses with each passing day, which imply that we can do  what our ancestors can not do before, therefore, we are quite different for the matter. Only realize all matter can we conceive a thorough view of human evolution.


TOPIC: ARGUMENT232 - The following appeared in a memo from the sales manager of Eco-Power, a company that manufactures tools and home appliances.

"Many popular radio and television commercials use memorable tunes and song lyrics to call attention to the products being advertised. Indeed, a recent study of high school students showed that 85 percent could easily recognize the tunes used to advertise leading soft drinks and fast-food restaurants. Despite our company's extensive advertising in magazines during the past year, sales of our home appliances declined. Therefore, to boost company profits, we should now switch to advertisements featuring a distinctive song."
WORDS: 385          TIME: 0:30:00          DATE: 2006-12-24

In this argument, the sales manager recommends that the company should emphasis on advertisement which features a distinctive song. To justify the claim, the sales manager quotes a variety of facts concerning how crucial the function  of advertisement in the promoting of tools and home appliances. Close scrutiny of each of these facts, however, reveals that none of these facts render the recommendation plausible.

The threshold problem with the argument involves the fact that the speaker does not provide substantial evidence that the decline of home appliances is indeed due to the lack of advertisement. Unfortunately, we could not find any evidence concerning the cause of decline in this argument. Without such plausible evidences, it is entirely possible that the local residents cannot afford the tools and home appliances because of the high prices. Or it is also possible that the customer does not satisfy with the after-sales services of the company. Without ruling out these or other possibilities, the speaker can not convince me that by advertisement they can increase the sales.

Another problem of the argument is the fact that the sample people--- the high school students does not the major group that  would purchase the kind of tools and home appliances in the future. The speaker has never indicated that the study in one particular area of particular people could stand for the whole population at
all. In this case, the recommendation based on an unwarranted assumption is fundamentally flaw in this aspect. Without providing substantial evidence the recommendation cannot be plausible.

The final problem in the argument is that the speaker make a false analogy between the sales of soft drinks and fast  -food and home appliances. The two
different product should be analyzed based on different standards. The argument unwarrantedly contrast them by the same standards, which apparently render the recommendation is implausible.

In sum, the recommendation based on unwarranted assumptions which render it unconvincing. To bolster the recommendation, the speaker should provide information concerning the fact that the advertisement play a crucial role in the promoting of the sales of home appliances, information that the sample can indeed stand fot the whole population especially for the major group who will purchase the home appliances. And useful would be more information concerning the sales strategies  and markenting of the company.

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yaoyingUID: 2249342

在这里祝各位版主圣诞快乐！

呵呵，版主们辛苦啦！