issue26 [Synergy小组]ostrich第13次作业

ostrich1986UID: 2238177

26 "Most people would agree that buildings represent a valuable record of any society's past, but controversy arises when old buildings stand on ground that modern planners feel could be better used for modern purposes. In such situations, modern development should be given precedence over the preservation of historic buildings so that contemporary needs can be served."
很多人认为建筑代表了一个社会过去的历史价值，但是当现代城市的规划者想要利用老建筑占用的地盘做新的规划时，就会引起很多争辩。在这样的情况下，现代的发展应该优先被考虑，以使当代的需要得到满足。

提纲：
1 支持 随着城市的不断发展我们有必要拆除那些价值不大的老建筑 为新的发展提供空间 例 北京
2 反对 老建筑承载了历史与艺术 例子：巴黎由于保存了世界上最古老的文化，成了作家和艺术家向往的艺术之都。
3 反对 保护老建筑不仅是对文化保留做了贡献 同时也是对城市有好处的-----文化旅游带来巨大收益 例 伦敦


Should we give priority to modern development, not to the preservation of historic buildings, when old buildings stand on ground which modern planners feel could be better used of modern purposes, as the speaker claims? I fundamentally agree with the speaker on certain cases such as the old buildings-without much value in history-stand on the ground which is needed for the modern development. Yet, strictly followed, the conservation of artistic and historic buildings is not only a protection of the record of past art and history, but also a considerable part of income for the city.

Admittedly, it is true that modern development should be given precedence over the preservation of old buildings under certain circumstances. To meet the requirement of the period and society, the evolution and excess, from ancient to modern, should be planned and progressed. Take Beijing, host-city for 2008 Olympic, as an example. There are many bungalows in the city which are only the remains of the past with little historic value. Their existent has negative and disadvantaged influences on many aspects, such as traffic, city visage, circumstance, etc. The government is in process of dismantling them and building new roads and infrastructure constructions in order to ameliorate the currently condition. After dismantling these bungalows, the city will get enough space to rebuild the roads and infrastructure constructions, in which way Beijing will be an eligible host-city and hold Olympic successfully. In short, the age and society request old buildings to be substituted by the modern construction.  

However, it is because of the recording of history and art that we must protect the artistic and historic buildings. Paris is a convincing instance at point. What is considerably valuable is that many areas-many old buildings locate in-are preserved entirely so that Paris is one the oldest cultural capitals. This kind of successful protection is proved that it has more effect and it is approbated by nearly most of countries in Europe in order to protect more old buildings. There is no doubt that the buildings with high artistic and historic value play important roles in the realm of art and history. They provide abundant information and resources to artists and historians. Meanwhile they are the same as the history witness the past age and should be cherished. In one word, as the record of the past, we must protect those valuable old buildings.

Besides, protecting old buildings can bring the city an extra traveling income. The manifestation is that the government of London invests thousands million pounds into the preservation of the old buildings in which way enable the cultural travel of London to abstract millions of travelers and bring vast incomes to the city. Then this money will be used into the protection of old buildings in order to preserve the old buildings well and effectively. As an indispensable part of travel, old buildings could provide the city enormous benefits.

To sum up, for the development of the city, we should dismantle the old buildings which are little worth; for the record of art and history, we should protect the old buildings which are much value in art and history. These old buildings-preserved in good condition-will bring a travel income to the city.

                                                                                                                     

最後の使徒UID: 2257608

提供点业界的观点哈
对于北京的旧城改造和四合院的破坏在业界评价普遍是负面的，说那些古民居没有价值实在很牵强，而且北京现在的城市发展以及规划也不是很合理，主要问题出在狂建道路鼓励私家车破坏尺度感上，忽略了公共交通以以及卫星城的建设，最近的两轴两带多中心规划似乎要修正这个问题还获了什么国家奖但我们学校规划院那些老师普遍不愤老吴的方案。
古代建筑的价值往往是很难衡量也很难预测的，而且时间越长可能的价值越高，因此如何判定古建有没有价值是个很麻烦的事情，通行的国际标准包括：1，真实性；2，历史性；3，纪念意义；4，美学价值。一般要拆迁的建筑需要经过严格的论证（中国的做法在国际上看来是破坏性的），所以我觉得即使让步有些历史建筑需要拆除也需要很严密的分析，比如可能的代价和可能的利益，进行权衡以后再做出决定。
我考试的时候就抽到的这道题，当时是用主张靠建筑师和社会来调和现代发展与旧建筑保护，找到好的方法和平衡点，这个是时下比较流行的大众观点。

nostrumUID: 2124189

Should we give priority to modern development, not to the preservation of historic buildings, 这个句子太长了，这部分的插入语可以删掉，重复性的内容when old buildings stand on ground which modern planners feel could be better used of modern purposes, as the speaker claims后面这半句也完全没必要? I fundamentally agree with the speaker on certain cases such as the old buildings-without much value in history-stand on the ground which is needed for the modern development. Yet, strictly followed, the conservation of artistic and historic buildings is not only a protection of the record of past art and history, but also a considerable part of income for the city.这个主题句写得不错，有具体的观点

Admittedly, it is true that modern development should be given precedence over the preservation of old buildings under certain circumstances. To meet the requirement of the period and society, the evolution and excess, from ancient to modern, 前面这个铺垫，好长should be planned and progressed. Take Beijing, host-city for 2008 Olympic, as an example. There are many bungalows in the city which are only the remains of the past with little historic value. Their existent has negative and disadvantaged这两个形容词完全是重复 influences on many aspects, such as traffic, city visage, circumstance, etc. The government is in process of dismantling them and building new roads and infrastructure constructions in order to ameliorate the currently condition. After dismantling these bungalows, the city will get enough space to rebuild the roads and infrastructure constructions, in which way Beijing will be an eligible host-city and hold Olympic successfully. 推断太草率，城市建设哪能是一个问题就能搞定的，AW里面绝对化的观点尽量避免，体现思维深度的考试呢In short, the age and society request old buildings to be substituted by the modern construction.  草率，不是所有古建筑都该是这样的结果


However, it is because of the recording of history and art that we must protect the artistic and historic buildings. Paris is a convincing instance at the point. What is considerably valuable is that many areas-many old buildings locate in-are preserved entirely so that Paris is one of the oldest cultural capitals. This kind of successful protection is proved that it has more effect and it is approbated by nearly most of countries in Europe in order to protect more old buildings. There is no doubt that the buildings with high artistic and historic value play important roles in the realm of art and history. They provide abundant information and resources to artists and historians. 具体一点，什么information and resouces?来个例子Meanwhile they are the same as the history witness the past age and should be cherished. In one word, as the record of the past, we must protect those valuable old buildings.

Besides, protecting old buildings can bring the city an extra traveling income. The manifestation is that the government of London invests thousands million pounds into the preservation of the old buildings in which way enable the cultural travel of London to abstract millions of travelers and bring vast incomes to the city. 这里教个无赖技巧，作者可以编一个大体差不多的数字，这样说服力一下就上去了Then this money will be used into the protection of old buildings in order to preserve the old buildings well and effectively. As an indispensable part of travel, old buildings could provide the city enormous benefits.

To sum up, for the development of the city, we should dismantle the old buildings which are little worth; for the record of art and history, we should protect the old buildings which are much value in art and history. These old buildings-preserved in good condition-will bring a travel income to the city.

总体评价：良好
看得出来，作者的语言基本功是不错的，但是有一点我不赞成，作者特别喜欢使用插入语，这样很多句子都零零散散
尤其不赞成使用插入语跟非限制定语从句的是主题句跟总结性的句子，这类句子要得是精炼，连贯，很多的插入成分让人读起来磕磕绊绊

从文章来看，作者对范文作了一定的研究，文章的套路很正确，全文主题句写得不错，让人清楚地看到态度观点，不足的地方在于，例子跟论点的结合不够紧密，对例子分析不够到位

写文章的时候，论点不要铺得太大，可以选择使徒所说的几个标准来论述，求深不求泛。如果铺得太大，我们非母语的水平在45min内不好把握，每方面都只提到，但是都只是点到一点，这样得不到高分的，ETS在issue的要求里就体现了这样一个思路：不展开的内容，文章里一定不要体现，出现的内容无比展开有说服力的论述

写得不错，再接再厉

ostrich1986UID: 2238177

万分感谢 不是十分

nostrumUID: 2124189

给你这个链接学习一下

因为问题比较笼统，不知道从哪说起

http://bbs.gter.ce.cn/bbs/thread-523562-1-1.html