Issue177 【CSMY作文互改小组】第五次作业 有拍必回

lonixUID: 2202232

Issue177
"The study of an academic discipline alters the way we perceive the world. After studying the discipline, we see the same world as before, but with different eyes." 【翻译】对于一门学科的研究会改变我们对世界的看法。在学习这门学科之后，我们看到的世界一如既往，但是我们本身的角度和眼光已然不同。知识对于人类的影响
提纲：赞同
1．  学习一门学科，能获得对一个方面更加深刻的认识
2．  学习一门学科，也可以开拓视野，让人们能看到表面以下的内在
3．  学习一门科学，能让人们突破自我感官上的局限，洞悉自然的真理

Words: 622(modified)       TIME: 00:45:00               date: 2007-1-18
I strongly agree with the speaker that by studying certain academic discipline we alter our way of perceiving the world. Studying as one type of education provides us with deep insights and abundant information about the outside world, and even the inner essence hidden under the superficial appearance.

To begin with, through education we can sharpen our insights and enhance our knowledge to a further level that we can better understand and unearth the inner nature of things which were once being thought simple. The existing academic knowledge about the unknown world summarized and accumulated by our laborious ancestors or predecessors with their intelligence and hardworking must be fulfilled with profound experience and wit that would be necessary and even helpful for our knowledge learning and skill requiring. From the experience passed down by ancestors and knowledge imparted by educators, we reform our view of the around world and look the world in a new way. For example, when I was very little, I was always worrying about the day the earth turned over and we fell into sky. Until I learnt Newton’s laws and knew there is a universal gravitation that binds us and the earth together, the fear in my heart was cleared. Without knowledge about Newton's theories, I must have been still in the confusion and worried about the falling. Fortunately, this day never comes and at the same time I have leant more knowledge about the evolutionary process and the essence of the nature itself.

Moreover, education can broaden our horizon about the objects we are interested in. The imparted knowledge can arouse our curiosity about the inner truth which we once saw superficially. The decision we make to inquire the roots of questions is expressed so strongly that we always attempt to find a way to solve the problems invoked in modern society. The problems are so complex that we have to associate different knowledge and others’ intelligence to understand it. Take photoelectric conversion for an example, before I devote a whole semester into the studying of quantum physics, we knew little about the relationship between electricity and light, and the conversion between. I have once taken it for granted that light and electricity must be the same just because they travel at the same speed from physics textbook. Further education about the principles about the two leads me to make clear the inner mechanics about atomic transition and how this can be created. Therefore, further education can help us see through the appearance of the matter and investigate its essence.

Finally, education can make people pierce through the self-perception confinement and investigate the truth. Before we were educated, we always thought things in a superficial way and didn't how to unearth the truth below. For example, for a long time in human history, through observation many people felt that the sun is rotating around the earth. But the navigation around the earth by Magellan persuades us that the earth is round and the observation through Galileo self-made microscope tells us that the earth is not the center of universe. In philosophy, we also experience the same problem that on the road to seek the truth we are always break our sensor’s limitation.
Knowledge accumulation over recent decades makes it come true that some controversial problems that have once confused and agitated people have been perfectly solved. In front of truth, we need sufficient knowledge to fulfill us that we can understand and find the truth that seems beyond our imagination.

In conclusion, through education we broaden our knowledge scale, sharpen our view of the world, break through the confinement of our perception, and actually know the inner truth of matter, things and even human beings themselves.   

DIDOROSEUID: 2183292

汗老是粘上来就乱了

我在附件再加一个~~~

I strongly agree with the speaker that by studying certain academic discipline we alter our way of perceiving the world. Studying as one type of education provides us with deep insights and abundant information about the outside world, even the inner essence(感觉ESSENCE就是INNER的，有点语意重复) hidden under the superficial appearance.To begin with, through education we can sharpen our insights and enhance our knowledge to a further level（这两个词搭配感觉不对，一个是加强一个是提升，可以把ENHANCE换成advance） that we can better understand and unearth the inner nature of things which wereonce being thought simple（once seemed mysterious）. The existing academic knowledge about the unknown world summarized and accumulated by our laborious ancestors or predecessors with their intelligence and hardworking（觉得和LABORIOUS 重复） must be fulfilled with profound experience（觉得经验用多形容就可以了） and wit that would be necessary and even helpful for our knowledge learning and skill requiring. （好长的句子，分2句出来比较好，看晕了）From the experience passed down by ancestors and knowledge imparted by educators, we reform our view of the around world and look the world in a new way.（感觉又重复了） For example, when I was very little, I was always worrying about the day the earth turned over and we fell into sky. Until I learnt Newton’s laws and knew there is a universal gravitation that binds us and the earth together, the fear in my heart was cleared. （怎么说呢。这个例子`~~你可以直接说在牛顿定理出来前的一些迷信思想是怎么的，而他的理论出来后可以说改变了人们的观念，导致工业革命的到来）Without knowledge about Newton's theories, I must have been still in the confusion and worried about the falling. Fortunately, this day never comes and at the same time I have leant more knowledge about the evolutionary process and the essence of the nature itself.对世界的了解会加深Moreover, education can broaden our horizon about the objects we are interested in. The imparted knowledge can arouse our curiosity about the inner truth which we once saw superficially. The decision we make to inquire the roots of questions is expressed so strongly that we always attempt to find a way to solve the problems invoked in modern society. The problems are so complex that we have to associate different knowledge and others’ intelligence to understand it. （我看得一头污水）Take photoelectric conversion for an example, before I devote a whole semester into the studying of quantum physics, we knew little about the relationship between electricity and light, and the conversion between. I have once taken it for granted that light and electricity must be the same just because they travel at the same speed from physics textbook. Further education about the principles about the two leads me to make clear the inner mechanics about atomic transition and how this can be created. Therefore, further education can help us see through the appearance of the matter and investigate its essence.扩展视野，但是我看到你写的限于对学科认识的升华，但是看世界的眼光怎么变的呢？你看世界不会也老想着光电子吧哈哈

可以改成比如在思维上怎么改变你的，思维方式变了，看世界的眼光也就变了

你这么写感觉在写怎么促进你学习一门科学了Finally, education can make people pierce through the self-perception confinement and investigate the truth. Before we were educated, we always thought things in a superficial way and didn't how to unearth the truth below. For example, for a long time in human history, through observation many people felt that the sun is rotating around the earth. But the navigation around the earth by Magellan persuades us that the earth is round and the observation through Galileo self-made microscope tells us that the earth is not the center of universe. In philosophy, we also experience the same problem that on the road to seek the truth we are always break our sensor’s limitation. Knowledge accumulation over recent decades makes it come true that some controversial problems that have once confused and agitated people have been perfectly solved. In front of truth, we need sufficient knowledge to fulfill us that we can understand and find the truth that seems beyond our imagination.我们看到了本质，但是你写的是别人带给我们的本质

这和第一段我们加深了对外界的认识有什么区别呢

环球航行说服了我们地球是圆的————XXX通过学习知识觉得地球是圆的然后就去航行结果地球的确是圆的，我们终于发现了本质

2种说法想表达的意思是不一样的In conclusion, through education we broaden our knowledge scale, sharpen our view of the world, break through the confinement of our perception, and actually know the inner truth of matter, things and even human beings themselves.   

限时写的，仰望
词汇很不错了
句子太长我有些地方看半天才懂
提纲上再加强点就是了：）

[ 本帖最后由 DIDOROSE 于 2007-1-19 19:25 编辑 ]

lonixUID: 2202232

Words: 622(modified)       TIME: 00:45:00               date: 2007-1-18
I strongly agree with the speaker that by studying certain academic discipline we alter our way of perceiving the world. Studying as one type of education provides us with deep insights and abundant information about the outside world, even the inner essence(感觉ESSENCE就是INNER的，有点语意重复)[ 没有语义重复 e.g. When our outer expression is aligned with our inner essence, we are in union with self, others and the universe] hidden under the superficial appearance.

To begin with, through education we can sharpen our insights and enhance our knowledge to a further level（这两个词搭配感觉不对，一个是加强一个是提升，可以把ENHANCE换成advance, 认同，不过我想改成widen/broaden） that we can better understand and unearth the inner nature of things which were once being thought simple（once seemed mysterious你的修改比较好）. The existing academic knowledge about the unknown world summarized and accumulated by our laborious ancestors or predecessors with their intelligence and hardworking（觉得和LABORIOUS 重复, 是语义重复了，但是我觉得这样表示也可吧） must be fulfilled with profound experience（觉得经验用多形容就可以了,对，我该ample） and wit that would be necessary and even helpful for our knowledge learning and skill requiring. （好长的句子，分2句出来比较好，看晕了 赞同，以后不会写了）From the experience passed down by ancestors and knowledge imparted by educators, we reform our view of the around world and look the world in a new way.（感觉又重复了 对，这句确实不该重复） For example, when I was very little[young], I was always worrying about the day the earth turned over and we fell into sky. Until I learnt Newton’s laws and knew there is a universal gravitation that binds us and the earth together, the fear in my heart was cleared. （怎么说呢。这个例子`~~你可以直接说在牛顿定理出来前的一些迷信思想是怎么的，而他的理论出来后可以说改变了人们的观念，导致工业革命的到来,谢谢指导，从举例可以看到我思想是多么的贫乏）Without knowledge about Newton's theories, I must have been still in the confusion and worried about the falling. Fortunately, this day never comes and at the same time I have leant more knowledge about the evolutionary process and the essence of the nature itself.
对世界的了解会加深
Moreover, education can broaden our horizon about the objects we are interested in. The imparted knowledge can arouse our curiosity about the inner truth which we once saw superficially. The decision we make to inquire the roots of questions is expressed so strongly that we always attempt to find a way to solve the problems invoked in modern society. The problems are so complex that we have to associate different knowledge and others’ intelligence to understand it. （我看得一头污水，就是现实问题如此复杂，我们在解决问题的过程中需要引入别人的知识和指挥）Take photoelectric conversion for an example, before I devote a whole semester into the studying of quantum physics, we knew little about the relationship between electricity and light, and the conversion between. I have once taken it for granted that light and electricity must be the same just because they travel at the same speed from physics textbook. Further education about the principles about the two leads me to make clear the inner mechanics about atomic transition and how this can be created. Therefore, further education can help us see through the appearance of the matter and investigate its essence.
扩展视野，但是我看到你写的限于对学科认识的升华，但是看世界的眼光怎么变的呢？你看世界不会也老想着光电子吧哈哈 [可能是提纲写到了点，我的主题句就是教育能够拓宽我们的视野和改变我们对周围事物的看法， 感觉例子还是举得不成功]
可以改成比如在思维上怎么改变你的，思维方式变了，看世界的眼光也就变了
你这么写感觉在写怎么促进你学习一门科学了 [其实我是想以弄明白一个事情而使得我们对其有更加深如的认识，而这种认识本身就是一种对世界看法的改变，但是没有表达出来，失败]

Finally, education can make people pierce through the self-perception confinement and investigate the truth. Before we were educated, we always thought things in a superficial way and didn't how to unearth the truth below. For example, for a long time in human history, through observation many people felt that the sun is rotating around the earth. But the navigation around the earth by Magellan persuades us that the earth is round and the observation through Galileo self-made microscope tells us that the earth is not the center of universe. In philosophy, we also experience the same problem that on the road to seek the truth we are always break our sensor’s limitation. Knowledge accumulation over recent decades makes it come true that some controversial problems that have once confused and agitated people have been perfectly solved. In front of truth, we need sufficient knowledge to fulfill us that we can understand and find the truth that seems beyond our imagination.
[这段的意思是学习突破了我们感官的局限，使我们认识了表象下的本质，但是主要是体现突破感官的局限]
我们看到了本质，但是你写的是别人带给我们的本质
这和第一段我们加深了对外界的认识有什么区别呢
环球航行说服了我们地球是圆的————XXX通过学习知识觉得地球是圆的然后就去航行结果地球的确是圆的，我们终于发现了本质
2种说法想表达的意思是不一样的
[恩，确实是这样的]
In conclusion, through education we broaden our knowledge scale, sharpen our view of the world, break through the confinement of our perception, and actually know the inner truth of matter, things and even human beings themselves.   


限时写的，仰望
词汇很不错了
句子太长我有些地方看半天才懂
提纲上再加强点就是了：）