{0706G-Aspire互改小组No.2成员adam]第二次作业，请大家指教

adamli629UID: 2230674

Argument 2
The following appeared in a letter sent by a committee of homeowners from the Deerhaven Acres to all homeowners in Deerhaven Acres.

“Seven years ago, homeowners in nearby Brookville community adopted a set of restrictions on how the community’s yards should be landscaped and what colors the exteriors of homes should be painted. Since then, average property values have tripled in Brookvile. In order to rise property values in Deerhaven Acres, we should adopt our own set of restrictions on landscaping and house painting.

In this argument, the arguer recommends that Deerhaven Acres should adopt their own set of restrictions on landscaping and house painting like Brookville did. To justify this claim, the arguer provides the evidence that after the restrictions on how the community’s yards should be landscaped and what colors the exteriors of homes should be painted, the average property values in Brookville have tripled. This argument rests on a series of unsubstantiated assumptions, and is therefore unpersuasive as it stands.
The major problem with this argument is that there has little relationship between the restrictions and the average property values in Brookville. If these restrictions didn’t set up, the average property values in Brookville cannot be attribute to them. But we can use another methods to make the average property values in Brookville tripled without set restrictions on how the community’s yards should be landscaped and what colors the exteriors of homes should be painted. For example, more and more people live in the Brookville, and many people want to buy a new house. That will raise the property values in Brookville.
Even assuming that Brookville’s people implemented these restrictions, but it was a long time from now. People could hardly accept these restrictions now. And we can’t do the same things now and in the future.
Before I come to conclusion, it is necessary to point out another flaw in the argument that even though the restrictions had successful in Brookville, the arguer still can’t conclude that the restrictions will success in Deerhaven Acres. Because the arguer didn’t tell us while the difference between Brookville and Deerhaver Acres in traffic, the people who live in these two areas’ characters and so on,
In conclusion, the arguer fails to establish a causal relationship between Brookville and Deerhaven Acres on the restrictions. To strengthen the argument, the arguer would have to provide evidence that the difference restrictions make the average property values tripled in Brookville. To better evaluate the argument, we would need more information about the difference about Brookville and Deerhaven Acres.

襄王有梦UID: 2297975

Argument 2
The following appeared in a letter sent by a committee of homeowners from the Deerhaven Acres to all homeowners in Deerhaven Acres.

“Seven years ago, homeowners in nearby Brookville community adopted a set of restrictions on how the community’s yards should be landscaped and what colors the exteriors of homes should be painted. Since then, average property values have tripled in Brookvile. In order to rise property values in Deerhaven Acres, we should adopt our own set of restrictions on landscaping and house painting.

        In this argument, the arguer recommends that Deerhaven Acres should adopt their own set of restrictions on landscaping and house painting like记得该是as,like不能引出句子 Brookville did. To justifyjustify证明是正当的，换成uphold是不是更好一点  this claim, the arguer provides the evidence that after the restrictions on how the community’s yards should be landscaped and what colors the exteriors of homes should be painted, the average property values in Brookville have tripled. This argument rests on a series of unsubstantiated assumptions, and is therefore unpersuasive as it stands.后面没有提到assumption，所以该改一下说法
        The major problem withof this argument is that there has应该是is little relationship between the restrictions and the average property values in Brookville. If these restrictions didn’tweren’t 被建 set up, the average property values in Brookville cannot be attributeattributed to them. But we can use anotherother methods to make the average property values in Brookville tripled without setsetting restrictions on how the community’s yards should be landscaped and what colors the exteriors of homes should be painted. For example, more and more people live in the Brookville, and many people want to buy a new house. That will raise the property values in Brookville. 这段应多列举他因攻击文章，而不是讨论采用何种办法能提高property values
        Even assuming that Brookville’s people implemented these restrictions这句是想说即使规章确实取得某种成功吧，感觉表达上有问题, but it was a long time from nowsince then. People could hardly accept these restrictions now. And we can’t do the same things now and in the future.
        Before I come to conclusion, it is necessary to point out another flaw in the argument that even though the restrictions had successful该是has been successful in Brookville, the arguer still can’t conclude that the restrictions will success动词是succeed in Deerhaven Acres. Because the arguer didn’t tell us while这儿的while用法有问题，去掉 the difference between Brookville and Deerhaver Acres in traffic, the people who live in these two areas’ characters and so on,differences of traffic, individuals’ characters between Brookville and Deerhaver Acres,应该展开说
         In conclusion, the arguer fails to establish a causal relationship between Brookville and Deerhaven Acres on the restrictions.错误的因果关系应该是规则的采用导致地产价格上涨 To strengthen the argument, the arguer wouldshould have to provide evidence that the difference restrictions make the average property values tripled in Brookville. To better evaluate the argument, we would不用would虚拟 need more information about the difference about Brookville and Deerhaven Acres.
       感觉还能更展开一点说，多注意一下小错误和逻辑关系
我水平有限，改错了别笑我呵呵，再讨论啊