issue147 【076G－背水一战小组】jw84第三次作业

jw84UID: 2283839

issue147
"Tradition and modernization are incompatible. One must choose between them."

还是觉得很乱，没有写作文的感觉了

提纲：
1.反对作者意见，传统与现代有排斥 也有相容
2.排斥;有的传统观念被推翻
3.现代引发的问题需要传统解决
4.传统与现代可以相互融合。
5.结尾
  
  The speaker asserts that one must choose between tradition and modernization for a simple reason that they are stark oppositions. I concede that in some areas, tradition and modernization seem to be exclusive. However, in other areas, those two can be coexist and even sometimes promote mutually.
  
  Admittedly, part of traditional ideas should be challenged and even overthrowed by modern ones. With the development of society, some traditional ideas gradually became inadaptable to social order of the time so that they destined to be on the verge of extinction. This is especially true in women's right. Throughout much of the history of Western  civilization, deep-seated cultural beliefs allowed women only limited roles of childbearing and homewmaking in society.  Women were deprived of property, education, and legal status. Whereas, Due a great part to the development of modern ideas behind feminism, the women's social position today are totally changed. Feminism has succeeded in challenging perception of womens's skills, with the result that some women are entering nontraditional areas of female employment. The impact of feminist thought exerts a profound influence on our life and our society becomes more colourful because of participation of female.
  
  Whereas, in some cases, tradition can keep the development of science and technology from aberration.The advent of new medical and reproductive technologies in recent years has complicated how ethical decision are made in medical research and practice.There are the most prominent issues in medical ethics:assisted reproductive technologies, human fetal tissue transplantation, cloning, and abortion. How to make such an complicated and important choice? The traditional ethic can help. The Hippocratic Oath, which have been taken for 2000 years by physicians entering the practice of medicine, will enlighten us to resolve complex ethical problems. In this sense, progress of science should be restricted by the traditional ethic.
  
  Moreover, tradition should be combined with modernization. In the architecture realm, old buildings and modern architectures can usually be seen harmonious in many cities, such as London and Paris. In the field of music, the modern pop music including R&B music, Hip-pop Rock-and-Roll and so forth seems to be incompatible with the classic music. Nonetheless, through carefully listening, it is more likely to find that many of modern music is synthesized by the elements of tradition-the rhythm, the twelve scale, the melody and tone. Considering scientific research, combination of traditional and modern methods plays an important role. The modern methods are to use computers to simulate the process of traditional experiments. In order to obtain more accurate and convincing data, it is necessary to validate the date both by computer and experiment. In a word, combination of them are beneficial.
  
  In sum, although modernization may harshly impact or supersede tradition in some cases, they are not incompatible at all. In fact, modernization usually embraces elements of tradition and be its useful supplement. Further, their combination would even bring benefit for us.

duduhahaUID: 2273118

The speaker asserts that one must choose between tradition and modernization for a simple reason that they are stark oppositions. I concede that in some areas, tradition and modernization seem to be exclusive. However, in other areas, those two can be coexist and even sometimes promote mutually.
  
  Admittedly, part of traditional ideas should be challenged and even overthrowed by modern ones. With the development of society, some traditional ideas gradually became inadaptable to social order of the time so that they destined to be on the verge of extinction. This is especially true in women's right. Throughout much of the history of Western  civilization, deep-seated cultural beliefs allowed women only limited roles of childbearing and homewmaking in society（这里读起来似乎不太通顺）.  Women were deprived of property, education, and legal status. Whereas, Due a great part to the development of modern ideas behind feminism, the women's social position today are totally changed. Feminism has succeeded in challenging perception of womens's skills, with the result that some women are entering nontraditional areas of female employment. The impact of feminist thought exerts a profound influence on our life and our society becomes more colourful because of participation of female.（这句话似乎感觉不好）
结尾再加句总结吧。
  
  Whereas, in some cases, tradition can keep the development of science and technology from aberration.The advent of new medical and reproductive technologies in recent years has complicated how ethical decision are made in medical research and practice.（能不能试着换一种方式表达这个意思？）There are the most prominent issues in medical ethics:assisted reproductive technologies, human fetal tissue transplantation, cloning, and abortion. How to make such an complicated and important choice? The traditional ethic can help. The Hippocratic Oath, which have been taken for 2000 years by physicians entering the practice of medicine, will enlighten us to resolve complex ethical problems. In this sense, progress of science should be restricted by the traditional ethic. （我觉得你这句不能和这段开头较好地呼应）
  
  Moreover, tradition should be combined with modernization(这么说似乎单调了些）. In the architecture realm, old buildings and modern architectures can usually be seen harmonious in many cities, such as London and Paris. In the field of music, the modern pop music including R&B music, Hip-pop Rock-and-Roll and so forth seems to be incompatible with the classic music. Nonetheless, through carefully(careful) listening, it is more likely to find that many of modern music is synthesized by the elements of tradition-the rhythm, the twelve scale, the melody and tone. Considering scientific research, combination of traditional and modern methods plays an important role. The modern methods are to use computers to simulate the process of traditional experiments. In order to obtain more accurate and convincing data, it is necessary to validate the date（？） both by computer and experiment. In a word, combination of them are beneficial.(其实你如果能把这段的开头和结尾都能丰富一下，让它们较好地呼应，效果会比较好，你这段例子选得挺不错的。）
  
  In sum, although modernization may harshly impact or supersede tradition in some cases, they are not incompatible at all. In fact, modernization usually embraces elements of tradition and be(as?) its useful supplement. Further, their combination would even bring benefit for us.

从你的提纲上看其实你的论证过程是不错的，从句式上看我觉得你的有些句子最好换一个说法可能效果会好些，另外注意下首尾呼应。

SkysijieUID: 2233317

The speaker asserts that one must choose（be chosen??） between tradition and modernization for a simple reason that they are stark oppositions. I concede that in some areas, tradition and modernization seem to be exclusive. However, in other areas, those two can be coexist and even sometimes promote mutually.
  
  Admittedly, part of traditional ideas should be challenged and even overthrowed by modern ones. （这点我没有想到，学习！！）With the development of society, some traditional ideas gradually became inadaptable to social order of the time so that they destined to be on the verge of extinction. This is especially true in women's right. Throughout much of the history of Western civilization, deep-seated cultural beliefs allowed women only limited roles of childbearing and homewmaking （homeworking）in society.  Women were deprived of property, education, and legal status. Whereas, Due a great part to the development of modern ideas behind feminism, the(应该去掉吧) women's social position today are totally changed. Feminism has succeeded in challenging perception of womens's（women’s） skills, with the result that some women are entering nontraditional areas of female employment. The impact of feminist thought exerts a profound influence on our life and our society becomes more colourful(colorful) because of participation of female.
  
  Whereas, in some cases, tradition can keep the development of science and technology from aberration. The advent of new medical and reproductive technologies in recent years has complicated how ethical decision are(is) made in medical research and practice. There are the most prominent issues in medical ethics: assisted reproductive technologies, human fetal tissue transplantation, cloning, and abortion. How to make such an complicated and important choice? The traditional ethic can help. The Hippocratic Oath, which havehas?? been taken for 2000 years by physicians entering the practice of medicine, will enlighten us to resolve complex ethical problems. In this sense, progress of science should be restricted by the traditional ethic. 这段的例子不错
  
  Moreover, tradition should be combined with modernization. In the architecture realm, old buildings and modern architectures can usually be seen harmonious in many cities, such as London and Paris. In the field of music, the modern pop music including R&B music, Hip-pop Rock-and-Roll and so forth seems to be incompatible with the classic music. Nonetheless, through carefully listening, it is more likely to find that many of modern music is synthesized by the elements of tradition-the rhythm, the twelve scale, the melody and tone. Considering scientific research, combination of traditional and modern methods plays an important role. The modern methods are to use computers to simulate the process of traditional experiments. In order to obtain more accurate and convincing data, it is necessary to validate the date both by computer and experiment. In a word, combination of them are（is） beneficial.这段有点堆砌例子的感觉，例子不少，但却没有论证到位。。
  
  In sum, although modernization may harshly impact or supersede tradition in some cases, they are not incompatible at all. In fact, modernization usually embraces elements of tradition and be its useful supplement. Further, their combination would even bring benefit for us.
（例子我会学习的，哈哈，挺好的。。）