Issue41 全文【0706G－Chasing For "6" Score作文互改小组】-请拍

rixiaohanUID: 2291600

Issue 41
"Such non-mainstream areas of inquiry as astrology, fortune-telling, and psychic and paranormal pursuits play a vital role in society by satisfying human needs that are not addressed by mainstream science."

I agree with the speaker's broad assertion that some non-mainstream areas of inquiry have a certain effect on our society; however, the speaker unnecessarily extends this broad assertion to embrace these areas whose effects are "vital" while ignoring its positive just find expression in minority of people which could not called “vital” and also ignoring its negative aspects.

I concede that the speaker is correct on the side of this issue that non-mainstream areas of inquiry can satisfy human needs that are not addressed by mainstream science, which can be proved in some common phenomenon that happen in our surrounding.

People used to refer themselves to astrology for getting some affirmative information to enhance their confidence on a mission which with some difficulties. Besides, when a person meets a crossing in life and he/she need to choose one of them to keep on going, while each has its strong and week points which lead this person to confusion than he/she inclines to depend on a unattached power – astrology or fortune-telling, to seek answer for avoiding repentant in the future.

Because some people pursuit eternal life which is impossible in this real world, so study on paranormal phenomenon such as “afterlife”, ”existing of atman” and so forth is another form of imperishable life. There are many people prefer to believe an eternal life not for themselves but for other people with who they have a close relationship—chummy or family members. Such believe reduce their sadness when they are separated from their loved ones by death.

But the positive aspects of these non-mainstream areas not reach the weights of “vital” to society, actually, what should be mentioned are the passive aspects, which will be demonstrated below.

In the first place, the non-mainstream principles are so perfect pretext for those people who used the non-rooted things to cheat people who are gullible and credulous. If a credulous person was told to have an unavoidable adversity, than he/she may be terrified and absentminded all day which are badly influence the following work and life and are possible hurt him/her family.
In the second place, such indemonstrable inquiry may raise scare for some abnormal behaviors, by those who believe the inauspicious predict deeply, such as spreading abroad rumors to public or demonstrating in a place with dense population. The scare may result to an unsteady society
In sum, I admit that the non-mainstream is good for people to some sense when it works as consolation or prompting. However, when such pursuits was over depended and extreme，it will bring negative affect to our society such as worries come from family and even the society’s scare

stonesundlutUID: 2235257

I agree with the speaker's broad assertion that some non-mainstream areas of inquiry have a certain effect on our society; however, the speaker unnecessarily extends this broad assertion to embrace these areas whose effects are "vital" while ignoring its positive just find expression in minority of people which could not called “vital” and also ignoring its negative aspects. wow 好复杂的句子，不过结构我没看懂

I concede that the speaker is correct on the side of this issue that non-mainstream areas of inquiry can satisfy human needs that are not addressed by mainstream science, which can be proved in some common phenomenon that happen in our surrounding.

People used to refer themselves to astrology for getting some affirmative information to enhance their confidence on a mission which with some difficulties. Besides, when a person meets a crossing in life and he/she need needs to choose one of them to keep on going, while each has its strong and week points which lead this person to confusion thanthan有什么用？ he/she inclines to depend on a unattached power – astrology or fortune-telling, to seek answer for avoiding repentant in the future.

Because some people pursuit eternal life which is impossible in this real world, so study on paranormal phenomenon such as “afterlife”, ”existing of atman” and so forth is another form of imperishable life. There are many people prefer to believe an eternal life not for themselves but for other people with who they have a close relationship—chummy or family members. Such believe believes reduce their sadness when they are separated from their loved ones by death.

But the positive aspects of these non-mainstream areas not reach the weights of “vital” to society, actually, what should be mentioned are the passive aspects, which will be demonstrated below.

In the first place, the non-mainstream principles are so perfect pretext for those people who used the non-rooted things to cheat people who are gullible and credulous 词汇不错呀. If a credulous person was told to have an unavoidable adversity, than 又是than？ he/she may be terrified and absentminded all day which are badly influence the following work and life and are possible hurt him/her family.
In the second place, such indemonstrable inquiry may raise scare for some abnormal behaviors, by those who believe the inauspicious predict deeply, such as spreading abroad rumors to public or demonstrating in a place with dense population. The scare may result to an unsteady society
In sum, I admit that the non-mainstream is good for people to some sense when it works as consolation or prompting. However, when such pursuits was over depended and extreme，it will bring negative affect to our society such as worries come from family and even the society’s scare

论证的很清晰，复合句和词汇都不错，厉害，进步很大呀！羡慕！但是有几个复合句我没看懂  给我讲讲啊！