六月IELTS 七分保底小组 (A类)灵雨离子第二次作业(完成2/5)

灵雨离子UID: 2332383

图17　#12

图16 (185 words)

The line chart indicates the monthly profits of three Australian companies, Acme Sports Cars, Branson Motors and Curtis Car Mart, in the car retail industry for the 1994 financial year.

The solid graph illustrates the profits of Branson Motors. July to December in 1994 saw a slightly increase in the number of profits from 20,000$ to 60,000$. Although there were fluctuations in the number of profits between the end of 2nd quarter and the end of financial year, the trend was fixed around 60,000$.

Compared with Branson Motors’, the numbers of Curtis Car Mart’s profits described as dotted graph relate a difficult climb from 40,000$ to 80,000$ in Financial Year 1994. There was a bottom in October.

The point graph shows the profits of Acme Sports Cars. There was a sharply decrease from 80,000$ to 10,000$ in the 2nd quarter. Then the figures soared markedly which reached at 40,000$ in the end of the financial year.

It is clear that Branson Motors and Curtis Car Mart have a creasing profits and Acme Sports Cars has a decreasing profits in the financial year 1994.


未完

[ 本帖最后由 灵雨离子 于 2007-5-11 17:32 编辑 ]

wushashaUID: 2289713

这次作业，我们两个相互修改……:handshake

wushashaUID: 2289713

我初步看了一下你的第一篇，听说Task1要用过去时态，请你注意一下！等你全写完了，我一起给你改吧……

[ 本帖最后由 wushasha 于 2007-5-5 09:54 编辑 ]

H-KevinUID: 2182070

LS的兄弟,其实还是建议一篇一篇的改,要不一次看5篇都要累死了

原帖由 wushasha 于 2007-5-5 09:51 发表
我初步看了一下你的第一篇，听说Task1要用过去时态，请你注意一下！等你全写完了，我一起给你改吧……

灵雨离子UID: 2332383

原帖由 wushasha 于 2007-5-5 09:51 发表
我初步看了一下你的第一篇，听说Task1要用过去时态，请你注意一下！等你全写完了，我一起给你改吧……

我不同意，新东方老师说，对到整个表来说时，就是graph做主语时用一般现在时，对于其中的细节，如ＸＸ年－ＸＸ年，用过去时

wushashaUID: 2289713

ok，我一篇一篇改……

computervisionUID: 2331955

原帖由 灵雨离子 于 2007-5-5 17:21 发表


我不同意，新东方老师说，对到整个表来说时，就是graph做主语时用一般现在时，对于其中的细节，如ＸＸ年－ＸＸ年，用过去时

这个观点是正确的，用graph时用现在时，
当用年代，公司啊，利润啊用过去时

wushashaUID: 2289713

[quote]原帖由 灵雨离子 于 2007-5-4 13:49 发表
图16 (185 words)

The line chart indicates the monthly profits of three Australian companies, Acme Sports Cars, Branson Motors and Curtis Car Mart, in the car retail industry for the 1994 financial year. （这段话最好重新总结一下，如果直接照抄原文的话，可能不利于提高成绩，当然，如果时间不充足的话，可以这么。现在是练习，还是尽量锻炼一下吧！）

The solid graph illustrates the profits of Branson Motors. July to December in 1994 saw a slightly increase in the number(这里需要用复数还是单数，请你注意！)  of profits from 20,000$ （A$,下同） to 60,000$. Although there were fluctuations in the number of profits between the end of 2nd quarter and the end of financial year（这里的the end of 2nd / 3th Quarter, 是指那个点，你想表达的意思，是整个3thQuarter吧？）, the trend was fixed around 60,000$ （A$）.

Compared with Branson Motors’, the numbers(这里需要用复数还是单数，请你注意！) of Curtis Car Mart’s profits described as dotted graph relate a difficult climb from 40,000$（A$） to 80,000(A)$ in Financial Year 1994. There was a bottom in October.(题目要求是比较Acme Sports Cars 和 Branson Motors，因此这段可以省略……)

The point graph shows the profits of Acme Sports Cars. There was a sharply decrease from 80,000$（A$） to 10,000$（A$） in the 2nd quarter. Then the figures soared markedly which reached at 40,000$（A$） in the end of the financial year.

It is clear that Branson Motors and Curtis Car Mart have a creasing profits and Acme Sports Cars has a decreasing profits in the financial year 1994.
总评：1。比较简练、几乎没有错误单词，但是$和A$请区分清楚
         2。有点跑题，题目要求只要比较两个公司即可，因此第三段可以省略
         3。再加点下降和上升的原因（图中有解释）会更好
         4。第一段最好不要照抄原文，尽量自己再总结……
              有不同意见，再探讨！谢谢^^^

[ 本帖最后由 wushasha 于 2007-5-5 21:02 编辑 ]

灵雨离子UID: 2332383

原帖由 wushasha 于 2007-5-5 20:59 发表
原帖由 灵雨离子 于 2007-5-4 13:49 发表
图16 (185 words)

The line chart indicates the monthly profits of three Australian companies, Acme Sports Cars, Branson Motors and Curtis Car Mart, in th ...

我发现我没有好好的看清题目噢～:loveliness:　嘻嘻

ShanghaiWuhanUID: 2335887

继续努力……

wushashaUID: 2289713

呵呵，第三次的作业已经出来了，抓紧啊……我这周末就要考试了，估计也写不了几篇了……你继续努力啊！！！

灵雨离子UID: 2332383

图17 (202 words)
The line graph illustrates the acid level (measured by PH) in mouth after we have eaten the fruit sugar, cone sugar or honey. The low pH values could make our tooth decay.

Without sweet foods, our mouth’ PH number is 7. Then in the first 5 minutes, the acid levels of the three sorts of sweet foods are all dropped markedly from 7PH (fruit sugar’s is to over 4, cone sugar’s is to 3.5PH and honey’s is to below5PH). After that, the figure of Cone sugar has a fluctuation in 5 minutes, and it is going up to 7PH in 15 minutes. Fruit sugar marking the acid level increase to 7PH uses 30 minutes. Compared with fruit sugar, the time which saw the figure regaining 7PH used 35 minutes.

As we know, the save side of acid level for our tooth avoiding decay is 5.5PH. The number of the honey reached 5.5PH (on the 10 minutes), after 5 minutes, fruit sugar arrived (on the below 20 minutes), and the last one is the honey’s (on the over 30 minutes).

According to the line graph, we can see that cone sugar is the most decay tooth in the three kind of sweet foods.