argument147 【0710G 五一互助小组】第1次作业

gluttonUID: 2330210

147The following appeared in an editorial in a business magazine.

"Although the sales of Whirlwind video games have declined over the past two years, a recent survey of video-game players suggests that this sales trend is about to be reversed. The survey asked video-game players what features they thought were most important in a video game. According to the survey, players prefer games that provide lifelike graphics, which require the most up-to-date computers. Whirlwind has just introduced several such games with an extensive advertising campaign directed at people 10 to 25 years old, the age-group most likely to play video games. It follows, then, that the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to increase dramatically in the next few months."

正文：
  提纲：
    1 there may be other reasons that cause Whirlwind to lose is profit.
    2 the advertising campaign may not turn out be  successful
    3 the product's price may be to high for customers to afford  

  The editorial claims that the sales trend of Whirlwind video games is about to increase dramatically in the next few months. Although the evidences the author given seems logical at first sight, the argument suffers several promblems which render it unconvincing.
  
  First of all, the arguer fails to analyses the reasons why the sales of Whirlwind video games have declined over the past two years. It is possible that the decline is due to  factors such as distribution strategies and inefficient management. Although the company introduces the games that cater to the video-game players, it can hardly increase its profits without solving these problems. For maybe in the past Whirwind also supply such games that player preferred, but it is the distribution department of Whirlwind failing to satisfy clients or there are often some quality problems of the goods that makes people do not want to buy the products from Whirlwind.

  Secondly, even if such problems of Whirwind like distribution strategies and uneffecient management do not exist, the advertising campaign directed at certain people may not turn to be successful. The advertising on TV or on the Internet pages may contain some material related to violence, which may not to player's taste. Or the time that the advertising appears on TV is not well chosen because it possible that the people interest in the video-game happens to be not in front of the TV. So the unsuccessful advertising campaign can not efficiently propaganda the products among players, then Whirlwind can not reverse the decline.

  Thirdly, although the players may be anticipating to playing the games that Whirlwind recently introduced. It may turn out that because of the high cost to manufacture each product, the price of this product is too high for the players to afford. The company may lose profit because all the products can not sell to players.

  In sum, the conclusion relies on certain doubtful assumptions that rend it unconvincing as it stands. To bolster the conclusion the arguer must provide clear evidence that there are no other factors such as the distribution stategies and inefficient management that cause the decline of the sales, and the advertising campaign will successfully attract the players. To better assess the conclusion, I also need to know that the price of the product is not too high for the consumers to afford to buy.

ruczephyrUID: 2181202

The editorial claims that the sales trend of Whirlwind video games is about to increase dramatically in the next few months. Although the evidenceswhat evidence? the author given seems logical at first sight, the argument suffers several promblems which render it unconvincing.
  
  First of all, the arguer fails to analyses the reasons why the sales of Whirlwind video games have declined over the past two years. It is possible that the decline is due to  factors such as distribution strategies and inefficient management. Although the company introduces the games that cater to the video-game players, it can hardly increase its profits without solving these problems. 题目只是在说提高销售量，而并没有说会提高profit这是有很大区别的For maybe in the past Whirwind also supply such games that player preferred, but it is the distribution department of Whirlwind failing to satisfy clients or there are often some quality problems of the goods that makes people do not want to buy the products from Whirlwind. 感觉有点偏离作者的意思了

  Secondly, even if such problems of Whirwind like distribution strategies and uneffecient management do not exist, the advertising campaign directed at certain people may not turn to be successful. The advertising on TV or on the Internet pages may contain some material related to violence, which may not to player's taste. Or the time that the advertising appears on TV is not well chosen because it possible that the people interest in the video-game happens to be not in front of the TV. So the unsuccessful advertising campaign can not efficiently propaganda the products among players, then Whirlwind can not reverse the decline.错误的位置找的还比较准确，不过错误真正的地方确有些偏差了，你这里说的这两个理由虽然也能说的过去，但是不是最主要的问题，而且人家也并没有说一定会在TV上播。

  Thirdly, although the players may be anticipating to playing the games that Whirlwind recently introduced. It may turn out that because of the high cost to manufacture each product, the price of this product is too high for the players to afford. The company may lose profit because all the products can not sell to players.还是销售量和profit的关系，而且伤其10纸不如断其一指，与其找很多错误不如把比较明显的错误论证深刻清楚了。

  In sum, the conclusion relies on certain doubtful assumptions that rend it unconvincing as it stands. To bolster the conclusion the arguer must provide clear evidence that there are no other factors such as the distribution stategies and inefficient management that cause the decline of the sales, and the advertising campaign will successfully attract the players. To better assess the conclusion, I also need to know that the price of the product is not too high for the consumers to afford to buy.