N001_第十次作业

gnuliutingtingUID: 2123029

13号 wallace作业

Delta小作文
The lecture mainly discussed visual-spatial intelligence in the game of chess. And he says some features of the excellent players appearing in the game support the ideas in the reading passage.

A good player of chess has the ability to predict his opponent next move and the consequence of the move. And in blindfold chess, player could not see the board while he plays ten games with different people at the same time. Consequently, he should have strong visual-spatial memory to remember the position of each piece. These support visual-spatial intelligence involves the ability to create mental imagery and to transform that imagery. In addition, they call upon visual-spatial ability in the recognition of objects.

Furthermore, the strong visual-spatial memory is not just to recall something but reason and plan something. The master of chess could reconstruct board of chess which express a meaningful strategy support individuals with visual-spatial intelligence are skilled at taking things apart and putting them back together again.

不怎么会写小作文，貌似主要写了听力的内容，学习中~

woodmanUID: 161906

谢谢建议，事实上80题那篇只有2个分论点（为什么建议老外adopt）：一个是有趣（第3段），一个是可以学习中国文化（第4段）。第二段其实是一个describe吧，因为题目要求describe，所以在第二段我写了节日的传统以及食物，呵呵，诚如你所说的，月饼写多了，刚好背了一些材料，当时写的时候不留神就多了，汗，呵呵。
快考试了，还是挺担心的

[ 本帖最后由 woodman 于 2007-5-27 21:41 编辑 ]

woodmanUID: 161906

小作文就比较吐血了，来不及记下那么多笔记，只好有一部分自己自由发挥了，汗，我不喜欢delta的小作文，怎一个乱字了得，sigh

gnuliutingtingUID: 2123029

原帖由 woodman 于 2007-5-27 21:42 发表
小作文就比较吐血了，来不及记下那么多笔记，只好有一部分自己自由发挥了，汗，我不喜欢delta的小作文，怎一个乱字了得，sigh

我也不怎么会写，时间不多了，谢谢你对小组工作的认真负责，不然我早就掉队了，
衷心祝愿你考试拿高分，给我们提供宝贵的一手材料:handshake 。

woodmanUID: 161906

3号改17号
    All human beings live in the same Earth Village. People fromdifferent countries now gradually share lots of customs now. For example,Valentine's Day and Christmas are treated as important as traditional Chinesefestivals in China, and more and more Western people enjoy the delicious chinese(大写) food. However, weare still growing up in a culture which is significantly different with that ofwestern countries. Drinking tea is my favorite and I would like introduce topeople from western countries, who are used to(used to表过去常常，但老外现在也常喝咖啡呀) drink coffee. 开头有点冗长了，however后面的可以压缩一下。
    Drinking tea brings good to people's health, especially greentea. Drinking tea will fresh(refresh) your mindin some degree, just like coffee does, but its effect is so strong as thelatter. I had the experience myself, I've drunk 3 cups of coffee one day, andtill one o'clock the next day early morning, I didn't feel like to sleep. Onthe contrary, tea doesn't have the powerful, lasting effect. What's more, teaitself contains lots of natural components which can strengthen your immunesystem, some of them even can help you fight with cancer. (加个连词吧，however之类)Caffeine in coffee not only makes people heady but also makes peopleaddicted. In the long run, drinking tea is really a good habit.

    What's more, besides all the other benefits that tea brings toyou, even watching the process of making a cup of tea is appreciated. The tiny,delicate green leaf rolling(rolles) gently inthe boiling water, then sink(sinks) down to thebottom of the cup, and the tea water turns into the color of new green,gradually more yellow. (And)The fresh scent slowlydisperses into the air. Then you may take sips of the tea, some little bitterfollowed by slight sweet. What a wonderful enjoyment! People should try this bythemselves, and they will love drinking tea. 描写得细致入微，看得都快流口水了，赞一下，呵呵

文章字数可能不够，开头再简洁一点，没有结尾哦。虽然字数很少，但是可以看出mm的写作功底非常的强啦，我是描写不出那么有趣的泡茶场面啦，呵呵，学习ing

woodmanUID: 161906

为大家服务是我这个助手的职责，平时对大家有点苛刻啦，呵呵。等我考完回来告诉你们详细事项吧，呵呵。感觉听力还是没有复习好，做delta的有些综合口语，不知所云，尤其是前天做了immunization那道，好多单词不知道，恨死自己了，呵呵。

wgaggassi34UID: 2279352

改3号

In China, there are many interesting customs that attract many foreigners. One of these customs is the celebration of the Moon’s Day. It is August 15th on the China’s moon’scalendar. And it can be traced back as far as the ancient Xia and Shang Dynasties in China.
      In the past, the moon’s day was celebrated as a harvest festival. And people invoked the coming year’s good crop duringthe ceremony. However, nowadays this custom has changed into a family time. The main meaning of the Moon’s day is the family reunion. It is cherished by people because on that day every family member, some of whom are busy in work and lack time to communicate with family, get together to share the festival. During the festival, we eat moon cake, which is a special food on that day. The round mooncakes, measuring about three inches in diameter and one and a half inches inthickness, have a similar taste of Western fruitcakes. These cakes are madewith almonds, minced meats, bean paste, orange peels and sometimes a goldenyolk from a salted duck egg. Traditionally, dual moon cakes are packaged beautifully and sent to relatives as gifts in expression of their best wishes.
      Given the chance of coming to China,foreigners should not miss the moon’s day because it is very interesting. On that day, when the full moon rises, families get together in their beautiful courtyard to watch the full moon, eat moon cakes, and sing moon poems. And older family members tell children the legendary stories about moon. With thefull moon, the family, the poems and the legend, you can't help thinking thatthis is really a perfect world. Even for a couple who can't be together, theycan still enjoy the night by watching the moon at the same time. This seemsthat they are together at that hour.
      Moreover, despite many interesting activities on the Moon’s day, it is also a good opportunity to get familiar with Chinese culture which is deeply imbedded in traditional festivals. Just like Christmas and Thanksgiving in the West, the Moon Festival is one of themost important traditional events for the Chinese. The celebration reflects that ancient Chinese worshiped the moon. They regarded the moon as a beautiful andtender Goddess who would always bring them health, power and hope. Also, thefamily reunion is the soul in Chinese culture. Chinese people cherish the lovebetween family members very much. The elder takes care of the next generation, and aid children financially when children prepare for wedding or buy a house. And children support parents when parents are getting old and can’t earn money and attendthemselves.
      So, just come to China,and I promise you will have a good time on the Moon’s Day, and learn more from China’sculture.

我没写这篇文章,感觉很难写,写成这样了,也没什么意见好提的.

[ 本帖最后由 wgaggassi34 于 2007-5-27 22:41 编辑 ]

wgaggassi34UID: 2279352

Nowadays, people focus a lot on hunting for a good job and earning money. When it comes to whether it is more important to work at a job they enjoy or to earn a lot of money(是不是有点问题?我也想过这个句子,感觉不对劲~), people have different opinions. Some think that meaning of a job surpass the money, others, on the contrary, maintain that money is more important for life. As far as I am concerned, I side with that we should take a job we enjoy.(非常漂亮的开头~)
      It is true that money is indispensable to maintain basic living, such as eating, dressing and housing. Moreover, we might need money to pay college tuitions, medicine expense, insurances, andtransportation fees. Also, if we have enough money, we can travel to thebeautiful seashore of the Aegean Sea for a rest, or afford a favorite car that we might have been dreaming of for a long time. However, if we value a job only by money, we might lose the job we really interested in, or even go to the extreme of earning money by any kind of means.
      Generally, when we take a job we enjoy,we can get some enjoyment, which money can not be comparable with. Just like what Gorky once said, “When work is a pleasure, life is a joy! When work is duty, life is slavery.” (赞!)We cherish the success in our job, for example, a big deal with an important client, a significant breakthrough in scientific research, and a large improvement in technical skill, and we gain much satisfaction from it. However, if we work at a job that we do not like, despite of the high pay, we might be more likely to feel tired, even lose the happiness of life. What's more, sometimes money can be a miserable thing. For these who obtain money from stealing, robbing or evading tax, money leads them a fearful and fatal life.
      Moreover, some jobs have special meaning,though we earn little money or even no money from them. For example, aprofessor in a university sometimes cannot make more money than a skilled worker in a factory, but he enjoys teaching. In his heart, a bunch of promising students and successful achievement in research are the priceless treasure.What's more, there are a lot of people take jobs as volunteers or social workers without pay because they find that these jobs can show them meaning of life, that is, love and devotion.
      In addition, an enjoying job does notalways mean a low-salary job. In fact, there are many jobs which are bothinteresting and high-paid, for example, for those who are interested in option and future trade, a job as broker also has attracting pay, or those who enjoyoperating their own business can also earn a lot of money.  
      In sum, earning money should never be the most important thing in a job. We cherish the job we enjoy, for it offers us enjoyment and satisfaction, shows us the meaning of life, and sometimes it can bring us a high salary.

向你多多学习.开头很好,后面的几点理由值得商榷,但是你仍然阐述的很到位,厉害.

[ 本帖最后由 wgaggassi34 于 2007-5-27 23:05 编辑 ]

woodmanUID: 161906

3号改13号
Delta小作文
The lecture mainly discussed visual-spatial intelligence in the game of chess.And he says some features of the excellent players appearing in the gamesupport the ideas in the reading passage.

A good player of chess has the ability to predict his opponent next move andthe consequence of the move. And in blindfold chess, player could not see theboard while he plays ten games with different people at the same time.Consequently, he should have strong visual-spatial memory to remember the positionof each piece. These support (the idea of )visual-spatialintelligence involves the ability to create mental imagery and to transformthat imagery (in the reading). In addition, theycall upon visual-spatial ability in the recognition of objects(这一句没有关联上阅读的内容，显得突然了点).

Furthermore, the strong visual-spatial memory is not just to recall somethingbut reason and plan something. The master of chess could reconstruct board ofchess which express a meaningful strategy support individuals with visual-spatialintelligence are skilled at taking things apart and putting them back togetheragain.
呵呵，没有太多可说的，因为delta的小作文太bt了，根本不能练出真实水平。听力很强呀，看你的大部分都是听力内容，考试的时候继续保持，再对应一下阅读。
Delta 大作文
Most of people dream of getting a job that they enjoy or earn a lot of money. （when itcomes to whether interest is more important than money when valuing a job）However （转得太急了）different people holddifferent intentions due to individual value while(when)they are hunting (for a)job in market.From a personally perspective, I would incline to choose enjoyable job ratherthan a job that could earn much money.

To begin with, personally, having a wonderful life is the foremost thing to me.So the job that I prefer is the one bring(brings)me a lot of fun. In that way, I am able to contribute my passion and sweat(有点中文式英文的感觉) to the job and workeffectively to meet the demand of my boss. In addition, people who usuallyspend over eight hours at their place of employment deserveto enjoy(这个没看懂什么意思) their work environment and(but)if they always keep an unpleasant feelings along with working，(this你前面是条件从句，所以这里不能用定从，否则很乱呀) which might deterioratetheir health, （去逗号）physically and mentally, or evenworse this negative effect could spread among their partner then influencewhole company.

Secondly, considering hunt a job that could earn much money is not a(an) easy task for everyone if he has not griped(中文思维哦，does nothave)some special characteristics. But(这句话已经与全面那句话不是同一个观点了what’s more) finding a enjoyablejob didn't necessarily mean people only get low salary, it also guaranteedpeople earn enough money to buy house and other commodities they want whilethey performance excellent at their positions. After all, it is unfair to aperson who paid his at least a third of his adult life at work which is tediouseven if it is well paid. Unfortunately, it also causes many negative influenceson family. I have heard a pile of tragedy stories（去掉） that parents who totally engagedin their career could not spare much time in family then their children becameaddict or criminal.这一段没什么说服力，而且很乱，开头说找高薪工作不容易，后来又说有趣的工作也可能高薪，然后又说高薪占用很多时间。建议选一点展开就行了，比如你可以说感兴趣的工作可能是高薪的，比如什么什么工作（举例，很多啦，高科技，做生意等等）。
Currently, it is still discussing issue in society. As what I have stated, it'smore precious to own enjoyable job which allow people share much time withtheir family and enjoy life rather than own a busy jobthat demand（occupys） you too much time toenjoy life even it give you big fortune.

改得比较多，不要因此受打击哦，因为我自己也在不断修改自己的文章，昨天拿一篇文章给同学改，整个改得面目全非，全是红色修改批注，呵呵。建议如下：在论证没有充分展开的情况下，两个分论点略显单薄了点。还有就是中文式英文的味道有点浓，呵呵，如果你没有把握表达清楚你想表达的意思，选择简单但是明了的句子可能更好。缺少例子，哪怕找不到例子，说一下自己的例子也行（可参考本次作业17号的第二段，好好学习一下）。结尾不够精炼，没有提炼文章的中心意思。不知道你什么时候改，建议你好好写一篇，然后认真去修改，自己改，让别人改，反复思考别人提出的问题，这样会对你很有帮助的。

185_80
  In my country Chinaas a rising powerful force in this world (去掉)Spring Festival that(去掉) is the most important festivalin one year is the custom. I would like （to）strongly recommend （it to my foreignfriends）.Spring Festival so far has long history in China, in centuries it appeared asa ceremony rather a chance for reunion. If it isadopted by Western countries, it could help them acquaint with China.(很突然，不如去掉)

Currently, Spring Festival in Chinais mostly accepted by public as a big chance for reunion. However（内容上没有转折吧）, people still keepsome traditional conventions like what（which）was passed down fromancestor. It consists of seven days during festival which involves familyreunion, calling on relatives and friends, and going on street to celebrate.And the happiest thing for children is play fireworks, wear new cloth andreceive "Yashuiqian" from elders. Inaddition, considering in Western countries many people lack basic knowledge ofChina if Spring Festival is adopted by Western countries it provide opportunityfor them to be familiar with Chinese cultures.（并入下一段）
Family plays a commanding role in Confusion（不知道你想说什么） that serve asprevalent ideology（这个词很大，不常用哦） in Chinesetraditional culture. Nevertheless, in modern life, people spend not so muchtime as several centuries ago, so do the Western people who put individual asfirst place in their ideology. The traditionalvalues gradually fade out as time flies. It is unwise to abandon traditionalcustoms and cultures since they are foundations for any countries. Thus if welet Western countries adopt Spring Festival, it would also encourage us keepour traditional customs.

Generally, the main idea of disseminating Chinese traditional custom-SpringFestival from Chinato Western countries is great way to tell outer world about us. While we have absorbed many excellent customs from Western,so Western people absorb some essential and treasure customs from Chinais wise choice.（有点牵强）
还是老问题，有时候直接从中文生硬的翻译，所以感觉非常不地道。但总的来说，这一篇比上面那篇大作文有进步，至少观点要明确和清晰多了。继续加油哦！尝试每一段都有一个核心的思想，不要把几个观点揉到一段里边。句式也有待变换。加油！找一篇范文，胡敏或者450篇，仔细研读，看看别人怎么写的，怎么表达的，然后再自己修改，这样会使你有很大提高的。

如果你相信我所说的，请尝试将你的领悟运用到第11次作业，那么我会继续修改你的作业。这样我能发现你的进步，也可以进一步提出一些不足之处。


[ 本帖最后由 woodman 于 2007-5-28 00:00 编辑 ]

woodmanUID: 161906

When it comes to whether it is more important to work at a job they enjoy or to earn a lot of money 确实有问题！
应该改为:When it comes to whether it is more important to work at a job they enjoy than to earn a lot of money
太粗心了，没发现，汗。
谢谢指正啊，真没注意，呵呵

woodmanUID: 161906

说明一下：由于5号和11号没交作业，所以我改为修改了13号和17号。

zyechozyUID: 2253463

直接贴上来格式很诡异，传附件……

[ 本帖最后由 zyechozy 于 2007-5-28 19:55 编辑 ]

zyechozyUID: 2253463

抱歉那么晚才修改，而且口语还没听完……

加油！！

gnuliutingtingUID: 2123029

你对我建议来的太是时候了，收益匪浅。加油！

gnuliutingtingUID: 2123029

2号改4号
80
In china, it is quite common that a family have two or more generations living together（in） harmony. It is a traditional custom. Since the elder and the young living together bring numerous advantages, I strongly want people from other countries to adopt it.

On one hand, if two of even more generations living together under the same roof(赞一次~), the elder would help the young in many different ways. Just as we usually consider elder people wise, full of wisdom, they can give us a lot of reliable suggestions covered with study, work, making friends or even marriage and children cultivation. In addition, nowadays, many professional ladies may trouble （be troubled） by a problem that they should pursue their careers or look after their babies. Many of them are willing to quit their jobs and sacrifice their careers to breed their offspring. While, at the same time, they worry about how they can keep up with their work after several years’ absence. Here is a solution to this situation—grandparents are pleased to raise their grandchildren and ensure the love, care, health and education of them. Furthermore, living with the elders sometimes can restrain some bad habits. For example, considering senior people living in the room, you cannot hit the bar(泡吧一词很好，但是是否过于口语话？) till late night, or you’ll disturb other people when you arrive home.

On the other hand, the senior gain benefit with young people. First of all, the young are always full of vigor, they can move heavy boxes, wash a week’s clothes at a time, spend hours to prepare a delicious meal and so on. Therefore, this brings great convenience to the seniors.  Also, a recent study points out that the more elders communicate with young people, the less the feel(ing) （of）loneliness and unhappy(unhappiness). Needless to say, living with the young can narrow the generation gap efficiently.

From what I discussed above, I strongly recommend people from other countries to adopt this custom because, in addition to (not only) it make(s) different generations feel closer, but the young and the old(前面都是 the elder) benefit from it.

总体来说不错，语言流畅，行云流水般，望继续保持~


小作文
The lecture provides further information concerning the visual-spatial intelligence as described in the reading passage by giving an example the game of chess.

On the basis of the reading passage, we are told that visual-spatial intelligence involves ability to perceive patterns, to create mental imagery, to transform that imagery, and the ability to draw a picture or map of spatial information. The first special gift that individual with visual-spatial intelligence possess is taking things apart and putting them back together again. The second gift is that they can mentally rotate complex forms and can draw whatever object they see, usually after seeing the object for only a short time. The reading passage points out those gifts can be seen in the athlete’s quick react in sports like hockey or basketball. The professor supports the two specialties by claiming a chess player is often capable of predicting moves in advance, which means he has an outstanding visual sense, or visual imagination. And then, he extends his belief by narrating an extreme example: blindfolded chess game, a tamer（？这个没听到）, slower and less intensive sport.

According to the speaker, the blindfolded player has to remember the positions of the chess pieces. He cannot see the move of his reasoning and each of his a specific move. Interestingly, chess masters have an outstanding ability to reconstruct a chessboard they’ve seen for just a few seconds.（后面一段不太完整，我也不知道怎么改，努力学习中~）

吐血……