Issue48 [SWEETBOX小组]第6次作业

jiangyue011UID: 2340595

OPIC: ISSUE48 - "The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."

正文:
History, broadly defined as the study of past, conceals a wide range of extensions and connotations. Concerning which part of history should be study first, famous individuals or the average people, I would rather contend that history study should primarily study the famous, while the voices and behaviors of the average people in the group could be an auxiliary. To better illustrate it let me explore it in detail.

When we look back on our proud history at any given time, we may dig out several core individuals, with their gift, ardor and wisdom, play a dominant role in the historical trend. Accordingly, to better understand the particular history at that period or the historical advancement as a whole, studying such famous few has paramount significance from several aspects listed blow.  

First, since history is directly related to such brilliant individuals, there is no escaping the fact that their contributions, as well as their way of life, are prerequisites to get access to the past.  If one is interested in human rights of minorities and slavery, it is better to study famous individuals Abram Lincoln, who leads the civil war and finally abolishes the slavery, or Martin Luther King, who fights against the racial segregation with courage and persistence and finally lets the white and the black could sit in the same table with brotherhood. History study, if rejects to excellence and brilliance pertain to both the famous few and their contributions, however, would resorts to mediocrity. This phenomenon would not bring about many benefits to the advancement of the society and offspring might have little inspiration from such history.

Moreover, on the individual level, the study of the famous few benefits every individual of the society psychologically. The contributions of the famous few and their charming characters, attract people who live after them to strive to unravel the mystery necessities of such epic achievements and stimulate them to seek, to find, and to exert so as to gain similar accomplishments.  Also, historical elites have set examples to the society concerning a myriad of virtues, which is an indispensable or even the most efficient way to educate the next generations with moralities. For example, learning Washington's story of chopping cherry trees, children begin to know what honesty is, learning Columbus's pioneer voyage that leads the discovery of America, children know the true meaning of courage.

Another reason for the significances of the study of the famous few is that the record of the past better preserved is generally concerned with such brilliant individuals. While a large amount of news and information would be brought about around every corner presently, the well preserved records of the past, concretely referred to paper record, sites and relics, are usually interested in the famous because many of such records are so precious that only the most important incidents and the most important people could be adopted.

Nevertheless, to maintain the integrity and roundly reveal the truth of the history, the significance of the average people of the groups should not be overshadowed. History is created both by the brilliant minds and every hand of the average people. Thus, a comprehensive study of the history necessitates a lot of resources related to the average people in many groups. For example, to study the history of the development of classic mechanics, we should not only pay attention to Isaac Newton or his great works epitomized in the ‘Mathematical Principles of Natural Philosophy’, we should at least study many other less renown scientists by the fact that even brilliant and great individuals as Newton confesses that the secrets of his success is because he was standing on the shoulders of other giants. Further, to get a comprehensive understanding of the culture, customs, ethnic, way of life of a certain period, merely studying the clothes, speeches, behaviors of the famous few is not enough: we should at the same time take into account the common people because such issues are embodied by the average people as a whole.

To sum up, history study should first emphasis the significance of the famous few because of their conspicuous achievements, models to transmit virtues ceaselessly and the records of the history, the groups should also not be omitted due to their part of contribution to the explanation of the past. While the brilliant individual people, as well as the common place ones, comprise an integral society, a joint study of the two categories comprise a successful study of the elapsed time.

限时严重失败,一周没写了,都找不到感觉了.:mad

[ 本帖最后由 jiangyue011 于 2007-6-30 17:01 编辑 ]

小破孩UID: 2125288

History, broadly defined as the study of past, conceals a wide range of extensions and connotations. Concerning which part of history should be study first, famous individuals or the average people, I would rather contend that history study should primarily study the famous, while the voices and behaviors of the average people in the group could be an auxiliary. To better illustrate it let me explore it in detail.

When we look back on our proud history at any given time, we may dig out several core individuals, with their gift, ardor and wisdom, play a dominant role in the historical trend. Accordingly, to better understand the particular history at that period or the historical advancement as a whole, studying such famous few has paramount significance from several aspects listed blow. 有个问题，感觉这两段都可以当成introduction，而且似乎这段并没有真正的论点，呵呵，如果是这样为啥还要写两段啊，望指教

First, since history is directly related to such brilliant individuals, there is no escaping the fact that their contributions, as well as their way of life, are prerequisites to get access to the past.  If one is interested in human rights of minorities and slavery, it is better to study famous individuals Abram Lincoln, who leads the civil war and finally abolishes the slavery, or Martin Luther King, who fights against the racial segregation with courage and persistence and finally lets the white and the black could sit could可以去掉吧 in the same table with brotherhood. History study, if rejects to excellence and brilliance pertain to both the famous few and their contributions两个逗号之间的语法没看懂~~~汗一个, however,前面是if假设为啥直接就来了个however? would resorts to mediocrity. This phenomenon would not bring about many benefits to the advancement of the society and offspring might have little inspiration from such history.

Moreover, on the individual level, the study of the famous few benefits every individual of the society psychologically(个人感觉这个词用得有点画蛇添足？）. The contributions of the famous few and their charming characters, attract people who live after them to strive to unravel the mystery necessities of such epic achievements and stimulate them to seek, to find, and to exert so as to gain similar accomplishments.  Also, historical elites have set examples to the society concerning a myriad of virtues, which is an indispensable or even the most efficient way to educate the next generations with moralities. For example, learning Washington's story of chopping cherry trees, children begin to know what honesty is, learning Columbus's pioneer voyage that leads the discovery of America, children know the true meaning of courage.

Another reason for the significances of the study of the famous few is that the record of the past better preserved is generally concerned with such brilliant individuals. 又回头看了一下你各段的ts，感觉是1。先说历史和名人联系紧密所以要研究个人2。研究个人有利于现在个人的品格建立3。历史上名人的资料比较详细。似乎1和3不是很搭配哦，如果说历史和名人关系紧密那当然历史资料都是和名人有关的啦，这不是一回事吗？或者两点挨着说？还是我又逻辑混乱拉？望指教While a large amount of news and information would be brought about around every corner presently, the well preserved records of the past, concretely referred to paper record, sites and relics, are usually interested in the famous because many of such records are so precious that only the most important incidents and the most important people could be adopted.

Nevertheless, to maintain the integrity and roundly reveal the truth of the history, the significance of the average people of the groups should not be overshadowed. History is created both by the brilliant minds and every hand of the average people. Thus, a comprehensive study of the history necessitates a lot of resources related to the average people in many groups. For example, to study the history of the development of classic mechanics, we should not only pay attention to Isaac Newton or his great works epitomized in the ‘Mathematical Principles of Natural Philosophy’, we should at least study many other less renown scientists by the fact that even brilliant and great individuals as Newton confesses that the secrets of his success is because he was standing on the shoulders of other giants.感觉这个例子说得有点罗索，而且句子有点长了。你这一句话可是三行半哦。还有个问题。你学习其他人的著作不还是个人吗，好像集体的意味不是很强。 Further, to get a comprehensive understanding of the culture, customs, ethnic, way of life of a certain period, merely studying the clothes, speeches, behaviors of the famous few is not enough: we should at the same time take into account the common people because such issues are embodied by the average people as a whole.这个似乎是再说表面和本质的问题和个人和大众关系不大吧？

To sum up, history study should first emphasis the significance of the famous few because of their conspicuous achievements, models to transmit virtues ceaselessly and the records of the history, the groups should also not be omitted due to their part of contribution to the explanation of the past. While the brilliant individual people, as well as the common place ones, comprise an integral society, a joint study of the two categories comprise a successful study of the elapsed time.我最不会写结尾了，学习之

我来学习来了，嗬嗬，lz写得好多哦，我issue还写不来这么多字
提了点意见，嗬嗬，欢迎批评指正，哈哈
也来拍拍我的:handshake

sara0522UID: 2336981

History, broadly defined as the study of past, conceals a wide range of extensions and connotations.(有点抽象噢) Concerning which part of history should be study first, famous individuals or the average people, I would rather contend that history study should primarily study the famous, while the voices and behaviors of the average people in the group could be an auxiliary.(这个是adj) To better illustrate it let me explore it in detail.

When we look back on our proud history at any given time, we may dig out several core individuals, with their gift, ardor and wisdom, play a dominant role in the historical trend. Accordingly, to better understand the particular history at that period or the historical advancement as a whole, studying such famous few has paramount significance from several aspects listed blow.  (我觉得这段有点像重复第一段)

First, since history is directly related to such brilliant individuals, there is no escaping the fact that their contributions, as well as their way of life, are prerequisites to get access to the past.  If one is interested in human rights of minorities and slavery, it is better to study famous individuals Abram Lincoln, who leads the civil war and finally abolishes the slavery, or Martin Luther King, who fights against the racial segregation with courage and persistence and finally lets(let) the white and the black could sit in the same table with brotherhood. History study, if rejects to excellence and brilliance pertain to both the famous few and their contributions, however, would resorts to mediocrity. This phenomenon would not bring about many benefits to the advancement of the society and offspring might have little inspiration from such history.

Moreover, on the individual level, the study of the famous few benefits every individual of the society psychologically. The contributions of the famous few and their charming characters, attract people who live after them to strive to unravel the mystery necessities of such epic achievements and stimulate them to seek, to find, and to exert so as to gain similar accomplishments.  Also, historical elites have set examples to the society concerning a myriad of virtues, which is an indispensable or even the most efficient way to educate the next generations with moralities. For example, learning Washington's story of chopping cherry trees, children begin to know what honesty is, learning Columbus's pioneer voyage that leads the discovery of America, children know the true meaning of courage.觉得这段论证的力度有点不够,你是想强调一个是有利于了解历史,一个是有利于学习品质吗?觉得你的TS两个维度表现的不太明显)

Another reason for the significances of the study of the famous few is that the record of the past better preserved is generally concerned with such brilliant individuals. While a large amount of news and information would be brought about around every corner presently, the well preserved records of the past, concretely referred to paper record, sites and relics, are usually interested in the famous because many of such records are so precious that only the most important incidents and the most important people could be adopted.

Nevertheless, to maintain the integrity and roundly reveal the truth of the history, the significance of the average people of the groups should not be overshadowed. History is created both by the brilliant minds and every hand of the average people. Thus, a comprehensive study of the history necessitates a lot of resources related to the average people in many groups. For example, to study the history of the development of classic mechanics, we should not only pay attention to Isaac Newton or his great works epitomized in the ‘Mathematical Principles of Natural Philosophy’, we should at least study many other less renown scientists by the fact that even brilliant and great individuals as Newton confesses that the secrets of his success is because he was standing on the shoulders of other giants.(有点问题啊,如果其他人不如他,我们为什么还要去了解呢?就好比我们吃一种药,这种药是副作用最小的,虽然这种药是其他药改良而来的,我们也未必要去试吃其他的药啊) Further, to get a comprehensive understanding of the culture, customs, ethnic, way of life of a certain period, merely studying the clothes, speeches, behaviors of the famous few is not enough: we should at the same time take into account the common people because such issues are embodied by the average people as a whole.(个人觉得你这段写的比前面好,所以让我回过头看你开头的时候发现你有点前后不一噢)

To sum up, history study should first emphasis the significance of the famous few because of their conspicuous achievements, models to transmit virtues ceaselessly and the records of the history, the groups should also not be omitted due to their part of contribution to the explanation of the past. While the brilliant individual people, as well as the common place ones, comprise an integral society, a joint study of the two categories comprise a successful study of the elapsed time.