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clearsky_lunaUID: 2121487

7.15 第二次练习

Task 2

In recent ten years, there has been a popular debate about whether animals experimentation ought to be abandoned orthe experimentation is essential for scientific development. I will attempt to present both side of this argument in order to establish my position on this issue of animals’ right to life and the necessity of animals experimentation.

People who are against the use of animals forexperimentation purposes consider animals have the equal rights to survive ashuman being. They emphasize that animals do have feeling of fears, pains, and emotions. As far as they are concerned, it is cruel to inject bacteria into a rabbit’s wound for observation on infection.

Though the trend of abolishment to animals experimentation has become more accepted by ordinary people, there are still several people insist that some certain research and development of science cannot be run without the sacrifice of animals’ lives. It is their belief that human’s lives are much more precious than animals’ and to benefit human being it is not immoral or wicked at all to take any measures.

Both of the two points above are reasonable, and, have not taken all things into consideration. No matter what position one stands,it is hardly for him or her to deny that every single animal, either for experimental use or for food use, even vermin, has the equal rights to life in the natural environment. If so, a question may arise: Isn’t killing cattle toeat or killing  locust as cruel as to experiment on frogs?

My answer to this question is: “Whether it is cruel ornot, it depends on the condition.” Mice in field and mice in laboratory have totally opposite function to human. From my view, to experimentation on animals is necessary. Scientific development not only benefit on human, but also on animals. What we shall do is to avoid and forbid abusing or mistreating animals.


Task 1

The two graphs illustrate the issue of men and women’swork time and their preference on full-time and part-time job.

As can be seen from the pie chart, men show a strongpenchant for full-time job. Only one twelfth of men would choose part-time job.Female, however, selects in a more average way. The proportion of women whochoose full-time job is only 4% more than the ones who prefer part-time job.

Because of the genders’ different inclinations ofpart-time and full-time job, the total weekly work time of men and women’s varydiversely. The line chart is based on a survey among 147 men and 147 women.There are more women than men in the groups of “under 5 hours”, “5 to 15 hours”and “15 to 25 hours”. Respectively, 7, 31 and 37 women select these threegroups, comparing with men’s number: 5, 27 and 32. 45 men work 25 to 35 hoursper week while there are 41 women in this group. 31 women work 35 to 45 hoursweekly, 5 persons less than men do.

=================华丽的分割线=================================

Task 2:
Earlier technological development brought to morebenefits and changed thelife of ordinary people than the recent technologicaldevelopment ever will. Towhat extent, do you Agree or Disagree?
(06.7.29考试题目)

Some people believe that the changes of our life contributed by earliertechnology are forceful more than the recent technology does. However, I thinkthat it is very hard to measure to what extent the earlier technology hasinfluenced on our life and does modern technology really brings less profit.

Though many modern technological developments are mainly based on earliertechnology, we could not simply say that earlier technology plays a moreimportant role in changing people’s life. To prove this thought clearly,examples go as below.

The invention of the electric light was a milestone inthe history of man,indicating that man had a farewell to the endless darkness.Yet, it was themodern technology, which made the cost of electric powergeneration anddistribution, also the spending on the light bulbs producing, decreased to areasonable level. As a result, electric light became popular in most familiesand the whole world entered a new era of electric.

Similarly, though people consider that Bell’s telephone has switched on therevolution of communication, only the recent internet technology has thoroughlyshifted people’s concept of communication.— The global internet impacts theworld, as if it evolves the big world into a small village where theinhabitants may acquaintance each other easily.

In conclusion, to rashly figure that earlier technology benefits our life moredoes not take all things into consideration. I believe that the power that pushesour world to develop is the integrated effect attributed to both earlier andrecent technology.

正好250个词。。我也不知道怎么掐得这么准。。。第一次写essay，用了1个小时的时间。。



[ 本帖最后由 clearsky_luna 于 2007-7-22 23:22 编辑 ]

clearsky_lunaUID: 2121487

自己先检讨一下

earlier technology 和 recent technology 同义词替换太少

forbeckUID: 2297645

原帖由 clearsky_luna 于 2007-7-14 02:16 发表
正好250个词。。我也不知道怎么掐得这么准。。。第一次写essay，用了1个小时的时间。。

嗬嗬！me too~~今天下午在写作文，组长那天给我开的小灶 ，还没动工~~:rolleyes:

嗬嗬！稍微看了下，发现这例子都在反驳我的偏激观点呐！不过，我觉得，让我改正，真有点难啊~~:o

[ 本帖最后由 forbeck 于 2007-7-14 22:04 编辑 ]

vlcbUID: 2132650

你的作文我改了之后发到你的邮箱了，希望能够收到:loveliness:

clearsky_lunaUID: 2121487

哎呀。。

雅斯又不是考观点

表达好就ok

clearsky_lunaUID: 2121487

做了新的task 1

H-KevinUID: 2182070

好像队员还没有看到吗，我来顶一下

clearsky_lunaUID: 2121487

你不要光顶你也给点意见哈

jessie_dengUID: 2282511

我来给你占起，下下来明天看看，现在实在犯困

jessie_dengUID: 2282511

你ＴＡＳＫ２都写了哇，当头的就是强哇，这么快

jessie_dengUID: 2282511

７．１０task 1的修改
The line chart illustrates the America, Japan,and the rest countries of Asia’s GDP growth, time ranging from 1995 to 1999.

The curve of Japan’s(Japan吧) fluctuated during the period. The growth got to its peak — 7% — in the year 1996. After that, it showed a sliding trend and then reached the minimum of the period — in 1998,the growth turned down( reached the bottom 4%好点样,这样可以突出区别,the growth 作主语好像不太好,换成the rate of GDP呢) to 4%.( The increasing rate of Japan’s GDP warmed up(升温,有这种用法吗,不确定) again from the year 1998, up to 7% once more in 2001.

The United  States, however, its growth of GDP varied in a different way. Between 1995 and 1999, the growth was in a period of increase.As can be seen from the graph, the slope became larger than before during 1996to 1999. In the year of 1999, American GDP growth arrived in(at 吧) the maximum 10%and turned down from that year.(感觉有点罗嗦,直接and then turned down

The change of Asia’s GDP was opposite(绝对了点吧,三条线本来都不尽相同,你只要突出不一样就行了,不用突出相对的概念) to both Japan and the United States. The increasing rate had not stop to decline until the year 1999, from 9% to 4.1%(其实有些用不着写这么精确,直接用about 4%即可). Since 1999, it had a 249%(没看懂,a great leap吧,大的飞跃) leap in 2001, to 10.2%(同前,above 10%就行了,必竟图中也没标出小数点来).


总的来说,描述增长下降这些比较准确,对图形里单线的描述把握比较好
但是要尽量找出其中的联系,线与线之间要做一个比较,你光说三条线不同是不够的,把这些不同具体话,不尽要有不同点,如果有共同点,最好写出来
最后就是结尾,用结尾段来作一个总结,文章没结尾,显得整篇文章就有点散.

[ 本帖最后由 jessie_deng 于 2007-7-18 01:03 编辑 ]

clearsky_lunaUID: 2121487

我觉得三根线的那个真的很难写，联系非常难找

不过我看大部分范文都没有结尾，只是简单叙述而已

新东方的老师也说不一定要加，说清楚就行


had a 249% leao in 2001, to 10.2%

这句是我在business week上看的句子然后套的～

nancyzhuoUID: 2253412

:loveliness:

vlcbUID: 2132650

Some people believe that the changes of our life contributed by earlier technology are forceful more than the recent technology does. However, I think that it is very hard to measure to what extent the earlier technology has influenced on our [url=]life[/url][lcb1] (lives)and [url=]does modern technology really brings less profit.[/url][lcb2] (时态)Though many modern technological developments are mainly based on earlier technology, we could not simply say that earlier technology plays a more important role in changing people’s life. To prove this thought clearly, examples go as below.The invention of the electric light was a milestone in the history of man, indicating that man had a farewell to the endless darkness. Yet, it was the modern technology, which made the cost of electric power generation and distribution, also the spending on the light bulbs producing, [url=]decreased[/url][lcb3] to a reasonable level. As a result, electric light became popular in most families and the whole world entered a new era of electric.Similarly, though people consider that Bell’s telephone has switched on the revolution of communication, [url=]only the recent[/url][url=]internet[/url][lcb4] (Internet)technology has thoroughly shifted people’s concept of communication[lcb5] .(加上一个主观的词语比较好，毕竟电话和因特网的都是革命性的东西，很难说一个比另一个更革命^_^，我认为。)The global internet impacts the world, as if it evolves the [url=]big[/url][lcb6] world into a small village where the inhabitants may [url=]acquaintance[/url][lcb7] (acquaint) each other easily.In conclusion, to rashly figure that earlier technology benefits our life more does not take all things into consideration. I believe that the power that pushes our world to develop is the integrated effect attributed to both earlier and recent technology.
[lcb1]复数？


[lcb2]Does 和 brings?


[lcb3]Make …decrease?


[lcb4]大写？


[lcb5]加上一个主观的词语比较好，毕竟电话和因特网的都是革命性的东西，很难说一个比另一个更革命^_^，我认为。


[lcb6]Large？


[lcb7]动词形式？

小邪好强，向你学习中.（学习膜拜中..............................）

[ 本帖最后由 vlcb 于 2007-7-18 21:20 编辑 ]

caraeyUID: 2213996

加油