issue109 【勇往直前小组】老十

nornsUID：2325187

TOPIC: ISSUE109 - "The purpose of many advertisements is to make consumers want to buy a product so that they will 'be like' the person in the ad. This practice is effective because it not only sells products but also helps people feel better about themselves."
WORDS: 800          TIME: 00:55:00          DATE: 2007-7-29 12:26:32

Modern technology and propaganda breed advertisements, and advertisements, broadly aimed at customs psychology weakness and demand, in its turn improves the sales and the economy. How ever, do many advertisement really talk people into buying something just by convince them the product will make them 'be like' the person in ad? Actually the complexity lying in this issue decide it has many conditions, sometimes it is, and others not, what's more, the effect of such kinds of ad are not entirely as the author stated, as we discuss below.
  Admittedly, we have seen lots of ads that mainly working in the way that the author described, this is extremely true when it comes to the ads in products of fitness, and the promotion of skin screams. For example, tipically the person in the ads of skin scream are of smooth skin, and good looking, in the purpose of convincing that the effect of skin screams can work well. And in the hope of being like the beauty in the ad, many women are easily lured to buy such products. Furthermore, when it comes to fitness, which have equal attraction for men as skin screams for women, it once again strengthens our beliefs. The men appeared in these advertisements are generally fit, strong and fit, which convince us that the effect of is this. Therefore, we are safe to come to the conclusion that some advertisements really works in the way as the author described.
However, as for the effectiveness, do these ads really serve so well as the author states? If we consider the long term effect, the conclusion is probably not. There's no doubt that every purchase of certain product will keep customers in good mood for sometime, for initially they believe that the product would bring him some benefits-otherwise he would not buy it at all. But as time passes by, the real effect of the products will reveal. For example, if a man take a kind of medicine that is specially designed to shape body for a quite long time, say, a year; but there is no significant improvements, then would he be happy simply because he think he is like the man in the advertisement? Certainly not. He will doubt the effect of the medicine, what's worse, because the advertisements make deception and exaggeration, he would probably feel mentally disguised and disappointed. Then such discredit behaviors of advertisements might incur a drop of sales in the long run. So, the real effect of such kinds of advertisements depends on the deviation between the advertisements and its real effects. If the effects are not in accordance with the customers' expectations, they can even do a counterproductive job.
  Owing to the risk of these kinds of advertisements, by deeply investigate the psychological factors of customers, instead, modern advertisements tend to aim at other needs of man kind, for example vanity or charity, which proved to be safe and equally effective. To illustrate, some people who recently marched into the wealthy class are quite eager for showing off. As to purchasing, not the best in quality, but the most high in price might be their motto. And some advertisements focusing the noble and elegance as well as the incredible high price can best meet their needs. For they do not care much about the utility, if the advertisements has widely shown how expensive the products are, their purpose of showing how wealthy has been reached. These advertisements are much safer than the ones as the author described, and they can also bring considerable profits. There are also advertisements aimed at peoples kindness and charity, one typicall kind of these works in this way: they will firstly show what a harsh life some children in poverty are leading, then they'll state that if you buy this product, how much of its profits will be denoted to these people who need help. In fact many people are willing to choose these kinds of products because they are happy that they can contributes a little even in ordinary life. So, these modern ways of luring one to buy a certain product are also effective and have little side effect.
  In sum, the advertisements that work in the way that the author describes are effective in some way, but in the long run, there might be side effect because of some exaggerations. To overcome it, modern develop a more skillful way by aiming the various psychology needs and weakness of people, such as the need to show off, the kindness of helping the poor, these methods are also effective. In all, the authors statements are too absolute: the effectiveness of the advertisements that the author described are in doubt, what's more, there are also other types of advertisements that serves effective and have low side effect.

[ 本帖最后由 norns 于 2007-7-29 15:32 编辑 ]

xiongnashiongUID：2359406

norns 想请教你一个问题
你的这篇文章写的很突破，应该是采用的发展段的写法。
首先说，有很多的广告的采用的“理想人”手法。论述时候说道了这样做，会对顾客产生心理副作用。
发展段说：现代广告通过心理研究可以避免上面的问题。

主题是：广告往往采用“理想人”，这样既可以增收，也可以让人们对自己感觉良好
一般大家都针对，可能会增收，但是不会让人们感觉好。应该属于部分同意的写法。
可能是我看多了 是，不是，部分是 这样的模板 ， 我觉得写发展段 是那种 要说和主题没有联系吧，它是有联系的，这段就写了广告改进的办法， 要说有联系吧，似乎又不那么紧密，因为题目讨论的是，大多数广告通过....达到了.....的目的，我们赞同，不赞同，或者折中，都跳不出原来的内容，现在写 可以....做来避免....。恩 似乎跳出了单纯的题目讨论的内容 我不知道这样写是不是算很好的切题，我也担心 这样写会不会很容易 偏题，你怎么把握这个度呢？
忘指教：）

PudingUID：2364107

由于颜色实在太难发，我变字体改啊。

TOPIC: ISSUE109 - "The purpose of many advertisements is to make consumers want to buy a product so that they will 'be like' the person in the ad. This practice is effective because it not only sells products but also helps people feel better about themselves."WORDS: 800          TIME: 00:55:00          DATE: 2007-7-29 12:26:32

Modern technology and propaganda breed advertisements, and advertisements, broadly aimed at customs psychology weakness and demand, in its turn improves the sales and the economy. However, do many advertisement really talk people into buying something just by convince them the product will make them 'be like' the person in ad? Actually the complexity lying in this issue decide it has many conditions, sometimes it is, and others not, what's more, the effect of such kinds of ad are not entirely as the author stated, as we discuss below.

Admittedly, we have seen lots of ads that mainly working in the way that the author described, this is extremely true when it comes to the ads in products of fitness, and the promotion of skin screams. For example, tipically(typically) the person in the ads of skin scream are of smooth skin, and good looking, in the purpose of convincing that the effect of skin screams can work well. And in the hope of being like the beauty in the ad, many women are easily lured to buy such products. Furthermore, when it comes to fitness, which have(has) equal attraction for men as skin screams for women, it once again strengthens our beliefs. The men appeared in these advertisements are generally fit, strong and fit(重复了), which convince us that the effect of is this. Therefore, we are safe to come to the conclusion that some advertisements really works in the way as the author described.（承认这种广告的好）

However, as for the effectiveness, do these ads really serve so well as the author states? If we consider the long term effect, the conclusion is probably not. There's no doubt that every purchase of certain product will keep customers in good mood for sometime, for initially they believe that the product would bring him some benefits-otherwise he would not buy it at all. But as time passes by, the real effect of the products will reveal. For example, if a man take a kind of medicine that is specially designed to shape body for a quite long time, say, a year; but there is no significant improvements, then would he be happy simply because he think he is like the man in the advertisement? Certainly not. He will doubt the effect of the medicine, what's worse, because the advertisements make deception and exaggeration, he would probably feel mentally disguised and disappointed. Then such discredit behaviors of advertisements might incur a drop of sales in the long run. So, the real effect of such kinds of advertisements depends on the deviation between the advertisements and its real effects. If the effects are not in accordance with the customers' expectations, they can even do a counterproductive job.（然而这种广告并不有效）

Owing to the risk of these kinds of advertisements, by deeply investigate the psychological factors of customers, instead, modern advertisements tend to aim at other needs of man kind, for example vanity or charity, which proved to be safe and equally effective. To illustrate, some people who recently marched into the wealthy class are quite eager for showing off. As to purchasing, not the best in quality, but the most high in price might be their motto. And some advertisements focusing the noble and elegance as well as the incredible high price can best meet their needs. For they do not care much about the utility, if the advertisements has widely shown how expensive the products are, their purpose of showing how wealthy has been reached. These advertisements are much safer than the ones as the author described, and they can also bring considerable profits. There are also advertisements aimed at peoples kindness and charity, one typicall(typical) kind of these works in this way: they will firstly show what a harsh life some children in poverty are leading, then they'll state that if you buy this product, how much of its profits will be denoted to these people who need help. In fact many people are willing to choose these kinds of products because they are happy that they can contributes a little even in ordinary life. So, these modern ways of luring one to buy a certain product are also effective and have little side effect.（其实还有其他有效的方法的）

In sum, the advertisements that work in the way that the author describes are effective in some way, but in the long run, there might be side effect because of some exaggerations. To overcome it, modern develop a more skillful way by aiming the various psychology needs and weakness of people, such as the need to show off, the kindness of helping the poor, these methods are also effective. In all, the authors statements are too absolute: the effectiveness of the advertisements that the author described are in doubt, what's more, there are also other types of advertisements that serves effective and have low side effect.
居然到800了啊
Norn 你太能写了
还是非常不错的无论从结构还是语言的流畅上

nbta03UID：2326371

Modern technology and propaganda breed advertisements, and advertisements, broadly aimed at customs(customers’) psychology weakness and demand, in its turn improves the sales and the economy. How ever, do many advertisement really talk people into buying something just by convince them the product will make them 'be like' the person in ad? Actually the complexity lying in this issue decide it has many conditions, sometimes it is, and others not, what's more, the effect of such kinds of ad are not entirely as the author stated, as we discuss below.  Admittedly, we have seen lots of ads that mainly working in the way that the author described, this is extremely true when it comes to the ads in products of fitness, and the promotion of skin screams. For example, tipically (typically) the person in the ads of skin scream are of smooth skin, and good looking, in the purpose of convincing that the effect of去掉 skin screams can work well. And in the hope of being like the beauty in the ad, many women are easily lured to buy such products. Furthermore, when it comes to fitness, which have equal attraction for men as skin screams for women, it once again strengthens our beliefs. The men appeared in these advertisements are generally fit, strong and fit fit重复, which convince us that the effect of is this(是不是多余了?). Therefore, we are safe to come to the conclusion that some advertisements really works in the way as the author described.However, as for the effectiveness, do these ads really serve so well as the author states? If we consider the long term effect, the conclusion is probably not. There's no doubt that every purchase of certain product will keep customers in good mood for sometime, for initially they believe that the product would bring him some benefits-otherwise he would not buy it at all. But as time passes by, the real effect of the products will reveal. For example, if a man take a kind of medicine that is specially designed to shape body for a quite long time, say, a year; but there is no significant improvements, (这里是否需要加and? P.S: 我经常不敢用这样的长句因为怕谓语太多，这句话如果不加and在语法上有没有问题？)then would he be happy simply because he think he is like the man in the advertisement? Certainly not. He will doubt the effect of the medicine, what's worse, because the advertisements make deception and exaggeration, he would probably feel mentally disguised（这里为什么是disguise伪装?）  and disappointed. Then such discredit behaviors of advertisements might incur a drop of sales in the long run. So, the real effect of such kinds of advertisements depends on the deviation between the advertisements and its real effects. If the effects are not in accordance with the customers' expectations, they can even do a counterproductive job.   Owing to the risk of these kinds of advertisements, by deeply investigate the psychological factors of customers, instead, modern advertisements tend to aim at other needs of man kind, for example vanity or charity, which proved to be safe and equally effective. To illustrate, some people who recently marched into the wealthy class are quite eager for showing off. As to purchasing, not the best in quality, but the most high in price might be their motto. And some advertisements focusing the noble and elegance as well as the incredible high price can best meet their needs. For they do not care much about the utility, if the advertisements has widely shown how expensive the products are, their(这里的their指代广告还是顾客有些不清) purpose of showing how wealthy has been reached. These advertisements are much safer than the ones as the author described, and they can also bring considerable profits. There are also advertisements aimed at peoples kindness and charity, one typicall  kind of these works in this way: they will firstly show what a harsh life some children in poverty are leading, then they'll state that if you buy this product, how much of its profits will be denoted(devoted) to these people who need help. In fact many people are willing to choose these kinds of products because they are happy that they can contributes a little even in ordinary life. So, these modern ways of luring one to buy a certain product are also effective and have little side effect.  In sum, the advertisements that work in the way that the author describes are effective in some way, but in the long run, there might be side effect because of some exaggerations. To overcome it, modern develop a more skillful way by aiming the various psychology needs and weakness of people, such as the need to show off, the kindness of helping the poor,这里应该另起一句么？ these methods are also effective. In all, the authors statements are too absolute: the effectiveness of the advertisements that the author described are in doubt, what's more, there are also other types of advertisements that serves effective and have low side effect.

其实norns文章里的很多长句我感觉应该划分成几个短句，因为我觉得有些句子好像动词之间没有连接，不知道这是为了语意的连续还是确实有些语法上的小问题，因此我自己写的时候也一般不大敢用（其实也是句子组织能力不行：））关于这点我想跟大家探讨一下，也请二位多多指教

[ 本帖最后由 nbta03 于 2007-7-30 23:48 编辑 ]

nornsUID：2325187

我也不咋的，这句我把标点改了下   严格来说是复句，if里面的是一个 “a man。。。，but there is no
； ”，后面再跟主句。 主语应该是he， 该句是个反问

经你提醒，but 可以改成with no further improvements; 确实更连冠

For example, if a man take a kind of medicine that is specially designed to shape body for a quite long time, say, a year， but there is no significant improvements；then would he be happy simply because he think he is like the man in the advertisement?

以后有有类似的疑问能不能麻烦你直接用红色把整句标出来呢？这方面我也很怕呢～大家一起讨论:loveliness: