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[习作点评] ISSUE185 [复制链接]

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发表于 2007-11-7 12:16:41 |显示全部楼层
TOPIC: ISSUE185 - "Scandals-whether in politics, academia, or other areas-can be useful. They focus our attention on problems in ways that no speaker or reformer ever could."
WORDS: 353          TIME: 00:45:00          DATE: 2007-11-7 12:01:50

Retrospect the development of history, we can see it clear that social trends are always affected by scandals. Admittedly, taking account of theses debated affairs may be a decisive step to attract the attention of public. However, I would still insist that a negative use of scandals can be harmful.

To begin with, scandals are not just providing a vent for public to focus; instead, they are how average person contribute their interests and compassion on the public issues. By listening to these scandals, populace will know what are the problems in our society, and what are the unreasonable routines that our society follows. Trying to solve these problems, they will manage to offer their hand to modify it in a positive way, and our society in turn will become a better place to live. Moreover, this keenness on social affairs can benefit people all through their life, imbuing them with passion, vitality and getting rid of them brutal and coldness.

On the other hand, however, free exaggeration and fabrication filling them out, scandals can hardly be categorically accounted on for the fact and realistic, no matter how realistic or vivid they may be. If given the pupuse of scandals is just to attract attentions of public, society will get into a mealstrom which will entangle society as a whole, let alone to guide the public attention in the positive way. When an individual categorically believed whatever scandals tells us, he/she is not just preventing himself form being objective and justice, ironically, he/she is jeopardizing the beliefs that he/she is advocating as well. As scandals are not just something for public to focus, but also a mirror of social trend, and a guidance of people's activities, it is crucial for public to scrutinize scandals in their clairvoyance and lend their criticism in order to made our society a better place. When we get the fine information after deliberation, we are just beginners, the key role of it lies in the efforts to modify and resolve the problem within it.  

What is more, scandals have a inconspicuous trait that will deny the achievement of people or institution involving in these events. For example, the scandals between the US former president Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky will almost overshadow the entire eight years of Clinton’s administration, which should not be effaced.

In conclusion, we may define scandals as catalysts when the actual movement of the public is the reagent. When catalysts proper applied, the negative effects of our society dismissed, and  more positive one imported, which will drive our society towards truth and harmony, and vice versus.   

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发表于 2007-11-8 14:27:02 |显示全部楼层
Retrospect the development of history, we can see it clear that social trends are always affected by scandals(是不是夸大了一点?). Admittedly, taking account of theses debated affairs may be a decisive step to attract the attention of public. However, I would still insist that a negative use of scandals can be harmful.

To begin with, scandals are not just providing a vent for public to focus; instead, they are how average person contribute their interests and compassion on the public issues. By listening to these scandals, populace will know what are the problems in our society, and what are the unreasonable routines that our society follows. Trying to solve these problems, they will manage to offer their hand (好像是offer sth. a hand才通)to modify it in a positive way, and our society in turn(原意是不是想表达逐渐的?in turn 好像不是很贴切,可以用gradually) will become a better place to live. Moreover, this keenness on social affairs can benefit people all through their life, imbuing them with passion, vitality and getting rid of them brutal and coldness.
(这句话写的太好了,用词很靓,学习了)

On the other hand, however, free exaggeration and fabrication filling them out, scandals can hardly be categorically accounted on for the fact and realistic, no matter how realistic or vivid they may be. If given the pupuse(purpose) of scandals is just to attract attentions of public, society will get into a mealstrom which will entangle society as a whole(不是很明白), let alone to guide the public attention in the positive way. When an individual categorically believed whatever scandals tells us, he/she is not just preventing himself form being objective and justice, ironically, he/she is jeopardizing the beliefs that he/she is advocating as well. As scandals are not just something for public to focus, but also a mirror of social trend, and a guidance of people's activities, it is crucial for public to scrutinize scandals in their clairvoyance and lend their criticism in order to made our society a better place. When we get the fine information after deliberation, we are just beginners, the key role of it lies in the efforts to modify and resolve the problem within it.  

What is more, scandals have a inconspicuous trait that will deny the achievement of people or institution involving in these events. For example, the scandals between the US former president Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky will almost overshadow (应该用过去时)the entire eight years of Clinton’s administration, which should not be effaced.

In conclusion, we may define scandals as catalysts when the actual movement of the public is the reagent. When catalysts proper applied, the negative effects of our society dismissed, and  more positive one imported, which will drive our society towards truth and harmony, and vice versus(vice versa?).   

lestou你的词汇量好大,好多词都不认识:funk:,有很多值得学习的地方
第三段的论述有点看不懂,少了例子作为佐证,感觉论述有点干瘪。另外有个问题就是字数不够,可能限定了时间的影响。



[ 本帖最后由 fuq_fly 于 2007-11-8 14:29 编辑 ]

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发表于 2007-11-8 20:19:40 |显示全部楼层
收到,thx

第三段的论述有点看不懂,少了例子作为佐证,感觉论述有点干瘪,有同感,关键是例子积累的太少,有点凑字数的感觉了

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