Issue185 【老兵小组】

wy86917UID: 2335014

TOPIC: ISSUE185 - "Scandals-whether in politics, academia, or other areas-can be useful. They focus our attention on problems in ways that no speaker or reformer ever could."
WORDS: 475          TIME: 00:45:00          DATE: 2008-2-10 下午 11:43:59

I agree with the speaker's assertion that the use of scandals can be great， for the reason that scandals can arise attention from the public that no speech and reform ever could.

First of all, I identify the term of scandal to be an unexpected , or at least on the opposite direction of the hope of public, event which happen on someone--and the one played a positive role in the society before. It is just the violent contrast between the perfect impression of the one in public mind and the ill-effected event he admits that has such a great power to draw the attention from the public while neither speaker nor reformer ever could.

In our minds, there are always some positions in the society combined tightly with praise and respect. As far as the functions of such positions are concerned, they are actually worth.  For example, in the mainstream media,  teachers are always compared as candals(candles)--who sacrifice themselves to provide us with progress and happy life. Our life experiences also make this impression stubborn --it is just our teachers, from primary school to college classroom, who teach us not only the professional knowledge and skills but also the principles of morality. Under such circumstances, with the enfluences(influences) from the media as we’ll as the kind impression from life, our objective(subjective) judgement(judgment) gradually wins over our skeptism(skeptic) spirit. What is more, the fact we have to admit is that most teachers are loyal to their positions. They try their best to act as what they teach--such as honest, kind and tolerant--to their students, which forms them idols in our psychological world. In other words, they would never make mistakes.（个人觉得可以去掉这句话）

So is（are --!!!） the(删) politicians. Though they are not so familiar with us as our teachers do, their figures are spread by the powerful media--the Internet, the newspaper and the TV set; What they talk is how to perfect our society, what they do ( at least presented to the public ) is the action beneficial to our nations, caring the poor and weak. Plus the positive reports to them, we easily form the idea that it is just them, but never others who contribute to our life and our countries greatly while on the condition that we could get no negative news（会不会显得有些不符合实际情况？） about them and the skeptical criticize to them would be treated as unsound or even purly(purely) other-directed(jealous会不会更好？).

Then, thanks to such impressions, which act as the pre-condition to create the true and lasting influence grasping the public attentions powerfully. Try to image one normal reformer, without much fame, who do the same to Lawenski(Lewinski) as what Clinton did. Or a usual speaker copies() his students' achievement and signs his name as what Huang YuXi did. At most they would be sent to the police station and got corresponding punishment. Yet their behaviour(behaviors) are never related to "scandal",  especially pales in compare with the influence scandals make. It is not themselves but just their identities—Clinton ,the American president, and Huang YuXi, the founder of Kurean(Korean) biology field--that raise a worldwide discussion about the balance between rights and responsibility,  a retrospect with the professional educators--morality and fame, which is more important?

On the other hand, the speaker and reformer could actually achieve the same result as what scandals do--that is, to sacrifice themselves and make their own scandals. The reason that their common methods bringing about much fewer attentions on problems is that there is no condition to create so vast contrast in the scandals. People living nowadays are used to the enthusiasm(enthusiasm) speech, let alone nomal(normal) education. Media are also in interest of something special. And the characters of scandals are suit to their tastes, which could therefore call enough attention on problems in the world.  

附：提纲
1 同意
2 给丑闻下定义，并解释有巨大影响力的原因——强烈的对比
3 4 先说好的： 老师给我们的好印象， 政客给我们的好印象
5 再对比普通speaker/reformer，解释原因（这段的解释大家还满意啊？限时时没时间了最后）
6 再说speaker/reformer 的方法影响力不够的原因——感觉还没说透

个人先自己点评下： 形式比起3段论感觉新颖点，但感觉有点头大身子小，前面作为铺垫的笔墨花的太多，导致时间分配不合理，后面没时间写，而且后面的观点阐述自己也不是很满意--！！！

大家多给点意见，怎么说都行哈
谢谢咯

starfishjingUID: 2420513

TOPIC: ISSUE185 - "Scandals-whether in politics, academia, or other areas-can be useful. They focus our attention on problems in ways that no speaker or reformer ever could."
WORDS: 475          TIME: 00:45:00          DATE: 2008-2-10 下午 11:43:59

I agree with the speaker's assertion that the use of scandals can be great，for the reason that scandals can arise attention from the public that no speech and reform ever could.

（基本照抄原题，起码不吸引人，建议适当改写，并增加信息量。我上次看教程，据说开头结尾很重要）

First of all, I identify（define?）the term of scandal to be an unexpected , or at least on the opposite direction of the hope of public, event which happen on someone--and the one played a positive role in the society before. It is just the violent contrast between the perfect impression of the one in public mind and the ill-effected event he admits that has such a great power to draw the attention from the public while neither speaker nor reformer ever could.

In our minds, there are always some positions in the society combined tightly with praise and respect. As far as the functions of such positions are concerned, they are actually worth.  For example, in the mainstream media,  teachers are always compared as candals(candles)--who sacrifice themselves to provide us with progress and happy life. Our life experiences also make this impression stubborn(别扭！我想是our daily life support this desirable character). --it is just our teachers, from primary school to college classroom, who teach us not only the professional knowledge and skills but also the principles of morality. Under such circumstances, with the enfluences(influences) from the media as we’ll as the kind impression from life, our objective(subjective) judgement(judgment) gradually wins over our skeptism(skeptic) spirit. What is more, the fact we have to admit is that most teachers are loyal to their positions（中国式英语痕迹比较重）. They try their best to act as what they teach--such as honest, kind and tolerant--to their students, which forms them idols in our psychological world. In other words, they would never make mistakes.（个人觉得可以去掉这句话）

这一段太长啦，我知道你的意思，但笔墨太多，而且不值得单独成段，我觉得还是几句带过比较好，尤其是看教师的赞美片段，这一段甚至连scandal都没有提到

So is（are --!!!） the(删) politicians. Though they are not so familiar with us as our teachers do, their figures are spread by the powerful media--the Internet, the newspaper and the TV set; What they talk is how to perfect our society, what they do ( at least presented to the public ) is the action beneficial to our nations, caring the poor and weak. Plus the positive reports to them, we easily form the idea that it is just them, but never others who contribute to our life and our countries greatly while on the condition that we could get no negative news（会不会显得有些不符合实际情况？） about them and the skeptical criticize to them would be treated as unsound or even purly(purely) other-directed(jealous会不会更好？).

Then, thanks to(过于口语化，due to 是不是好一点) such impressions, which act as the pre-condition to create the true and lasting influence grasping the public attentions powerfully. Try to image one normal reformer, without much fame, who do the same to Lawenski(Lewinsky) as what Clinton did. Or a usual speaker copies() his students' achievement and signs his name as what Huang YuXi(前面还是说明下这个例子比较好) did. At most they would be sent to the police station and got corresponding punishment. Yet their behaviour(behaviors) are never related to "scandal",  especially pales in compare with the influence scandals make. It is not themselves but just their identities—Clinton ,the American president, and Huang YuXi, the founder of Kurean(Korean) biology field--that raise a worldwide discussion about the balance between rights and responsibility,  a retrospect with the professional educators--morality and fame, which is more important?

On the other hand, the speaker and reformer could actually achieve the same result as what scandals do--（与你的立论矛盾拉！而且后面的解释没有说服力！题目已经区分开来了，你不能再把他们拉进丑闻里！）that is, to sacrifice themselves and make their own scandals. The reason that their common methods bringing about much fewer attentions on problems is that there is no condition to create so vast contrast in the scandals. People living nowadays are used to the enthusiasm(enthusiasm) speech, let alone nomal(normal) education. Media are also in interest of something special. And the characters of scandals are suit to their tastes, which could therefore call enough attention on problems in the world.  

我感觉还是3段式比较保险，利于控制时间和结构。而且最好明确把开头句子的观点亮出来。

虽然土一点，但我们不追求6分的那种自由行文，不是吗？

还有一些搭配总觉的没问题，但不地道，当然没有影响理解！

不过好在你是限时的，很不错拉。