Argument200 Savior小组第6次作业

brilliantsUID: 2347224

argument 200
In this argument the dentists who advertise made their recommendation that thet should  target the male consumers and emphasize both their anesthetic techniques and their service. To justify this recommendation they cite a statistics indicated three times more men than women faint, and they also assume that men are more likely to be distressed about having dental work. However, this statistics are suspicous and the assumption is unpersuasive as it stands.
First of all, the collecter of statistics didn't mention any time, we don't konw what time the statistics is derived, ten years ago or currentlly. If they are collected not ar present time it has nothing to do in supporting their assumption.Assuming that the statistics are up to date, there is no exact amount of men and women who visited the dentist, hence, we cannot conclude how many the number is to discribe more. Maybe there are only three more men faint than women do, but it is unpersuasive for me to convince the conclusion judging from such mere distinction.
Even if statistics collceted from dentists are credit, it is hastly to assume that the men faint because of their distressed about having dental work done than women.Perhaps they are both felt distressed but women show in another symptons such as psychological disquiets. Or esle the symptons on women are more serious than men so that they fare to visit the dentist.The author failes to consider annother factors and rules out these posibilities.
Finally, the author offers no evidence to explain there is a ceitain relationship between targeting the male consumers and their anesthetic techniques and the sensitivity of their staff to nervous or suffering patients. we cannnot expile other reasons the males consumers didn't go to the dentist, for instance the long waiting of cure, the noise of air conditioner and the rude attitude of the dentists. In any event, nothing shows the men's fowntness of due to the two mentioned factor as above.
In conclusion, this recommendation made by the dentists who advertise is lack of strong persuative evidence on several grounds. Some actual statistics are necessary to show ,also the exact time and the path of getting statistics should be spoken of. To convinc me the reasonablity of their assumption ,the author should offer the coherenty of the result and the causes given.

lsyunxUID: 2443450

In this argument the dentists who advertise made their recommendation(这篇A人家没有说是dentist写的) that that should  target the male consumers and emphasize both their anesthetic techniques and their service. To justify this recommendation they cite a statistics indicated three times more men than women faint, and they also assume that men are more likely to be distressed about having dental work. However, this statistics are suspicious and the assumption is unpersuasive as it stands.
First of all, the collecter of statistics didn't mention any time, we don't know what time the statistics is(was)derived (conducted), ten years ago or currentlly. If they are collected not at present time it(和前边they 冲突了。) has nothing to do(have nothing to do with固定搭配，表示与…无关，应改为do noting) in supporting their assumption. Assuming that the statistics are up to date, there is no exact amount of men and women who visited the dentist, hence, we cannot conclude how many the number is to describe more. Maybe there are only three more men faint than women do, but it is unpersuasive for me to convince the conclusion judging from such mere distinction.(这一段是说攻击调查的无效性，首先从调查时间攻击，说可能是很久以前的不足以代表现在，那应该把不能代表现在这句话说出来。其次，第二点我觉得你想说的是可能去牙科的男的比女的基数大很多，所以按相对比例来说，男的晕的还是少，就可以说明调查的结果不足为信。不过你表意不清。我觉得还有可能一点就是参与统计的医生有多少，他们病人的情况是否代表全部牙科医生的情况？)
Even if statistics collected from dentists are credit(这是名词，creditable), it is hastly (hasty) to assume that the men faint because of their distressed(这是形容词，应该用名词distress) about having dental work done than women. Perhaps they are both felt distressed but women show in another symptom such as psychological disquiets. Or else the symptons(症状不是这样写的啊) on women are more serious than men so that they fare to visit the dentist. The author fails to consider other factors and rules out these possibilities.
Finally, the author offers no evidence to explain there is a ceitain relationship between targeting the male consumers and their anesthetic techniques and the sensitivity of their staff to nervous or suffering patients. we cannot expel other reasons the males consumers didn't (won’t) go to the dentist, for instance the long waiting of cure, the noise of air conditioner (这个太离谱了吧，可以说牙科收费过高)and the rude attitude of the dentists. In any event, nothing shows the men's fowntness of due to the two mentioned factor as above. (这句完全没看懂)
In conclusion, this recommendation made by the dentists who advertise is lack of strong persuasive evidence on several grounds. Some actual statistics are necessary to show, also the exact time and the path of getting statistics should be spoken of(语病). To convince me the reasonability of their assumption, the author should offer the coherency of the result and the causes given.
错别字太多了，要注意改正。