作文求拍哈~~

AP1000UID：2469828

第一次写，大家狠拍啊~~:)
Some people prefer to live in a small town. Others prefer to live in a big city. Which place would you prefer to live in? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

Recently, the government in our country issued a police concerning the rising house price, which brought the issue of housing in the big city or the small town back into the limelight. Some people prefer to live in the city arguing that the city provides them with better daily facilities, while others consider that living in a small town as a more suitable way for them. As far as I am concerned, I definitely deem the beneficial aspects of living in the big cities overweight those of living in the small town, after careful valuing the merits and demerits of both alternatives.

A strong reason for my fundamental support of living in the big cites is that the big cities provides us with outstanding working opportunities which anywhere else could be possible to provide. There is no denying that the fast economic developing pace here in the cities fosters a great many chances that any individual with an ambition could find a place fit for him or her. According to the best available statistics undertaken by sina.com, the biggest Chinese website with excellent public praise and acknowledged authority, 90% of people migrating to the cities are for better job opportunities. Understandably, the big cites overweight the small town in this single but significant aspects.

Furthermore, there is another concrete reason which I exceedingly advocate, that is the big cites are equipped with better daily facilities and medical infrastructures. We can take a glance into my daily life here in one of the biggest cities in China. There are banks and postal offices within the two blocks of my community, and the hospital is no more than five minutes of walk from my apartment. Moreover, after a busy work day, I could easily find out a cinema or a café where I could hang out with my friends for relaxation. The entertaining spots are just wonderful. These are all the advantages that I can only enjoy when living in the big cities, and those I list above are just some of the typical among dozens.

Among the numerous factors that bolster my point of view, there are some other merits of living in the big cities which add more credence to my argument. There is no escaping the fact that the big cities provide us with more prospective educational chances. For me, there are better universities and researching institutes. And all the them are perfect place further my research.

Considerable though the benefit of living in the big cities may lead to, one should never neglect that living in the small town, to some extent, can be enjoyable. There is no denying that small towns usually have a healthier living environment free from industrial and automobile pollutions. What is more, life in the small town could be less stressed and people are more likely to take a relaxed step and really enjoy the life here. However, it is hasty to draw the conclusion only based on these advantages.

In conclusion, as my above contention, there is no fixed conclusion on the issue of which one is better, the big city or the small town. And it is arbitrary to hastily emphasis either of them. However, as far as I am concerned, I choose the big city better than the small town, on the basis of its better job opportunities, more complete daily facilities, and better education prospects.

mpromanusUID：2565872

Recently, the government in our (Why 'our'? Is there anybody else with you? Using 'my' is not any less persuasive.) country issued a police (I guess you meant to say 'warning'. If you're referring to an official notice published by a government, it's called a government 'gazette'.) concerning the rising house prices, which brought the issue of housing in the big city or the small town (The question is NOT about 'housing' in cities or towns. The question is about LIVING, which goes way beyond housing. Therefore this whole part on how a notice about housing brings the question into discussion is largely irrelevant.) back into the limelight. Some people prefer to live in the city, arguing that the city provides them with better daily facilities (The word would be 'infrastructure'. There's no such thing like 'daily facility'.), while others consider that living in a small town as a more suitable way for them. As far as I am concerned, I definitely deem that the beneficial aspects of living in the big cities overweight those of living in the small towns, after carefully evaluating the merits and demerits of both alternatives.

A strong reason for my fundamental support of living in the big cites is that the big cities provides us with outstanding working opportunities which anywhere else could be impossible anywhere else (请注意语序, 避免明显的中文直翻) to provide. There is no denying that the fast economic developing pace here in the cities fosters a great many chances, that any individual with an ambition could find a place fit for him or her. According to the best available statistics undertaken by sina.com, the biggest Chinese website with excellent public praise reputation and acknowledged authority, 90% of people (Who are these 'people'? They can't be those who are already living in cities, right? You need to qualify your data carefully, or else it'd only show ignorance rather than knowledge.) migrate to the cities are for better job opportunities. Understandably, the big cites overweight the small towns in this single but significant aspects.

Furthermore, there is another concrete reason which I exceedingly strongly advocate, that is, the big cites are equipped with better daily facilities and medical infrastructures (If you don't want to use 'infrastructure' repeatingly, you can just use 'facilities' alone. 'Facility' already means it's something that serves a generally mandane purpose and is meant to be used frequently, so there's no such thing like a 'daily facility' as if there's anything called a 'monthly facility'.). We can take a glance into my daily life here in one of the biggest cities in China. There are banks and postal offices within the two blocks of in my community, and the hospital is no more than five minutes of walk from my apartment. Moreover, after a busy work day of work, I could easily find out a cinema or a café where I could hang out with my friends for relaxation. The entertaining spots are just wonderful. These are all the advantages that I can only enjoy when living in the big cities, and those I list above are just some of the typical (facilities?) among dozens.

Among the numerous factors that bolster strengthen my point of view, there are some other merits of living in the big cities, which add more credence to my argument. There is no escaping of the fact that the big cities provide us with more prospective educational chances. For me, there are better universities and researching institutes, and all the them are perfect places to further my research.(You just said in the last paragraph that you work in a big city. Now where does 'research' fit into your life?)

Considerable though the benefits of living in the big cities may lead to (请把这句话用正常的顺序读一遍吧。。Though the benefits of living in big cities may lead to considerable?), one should never neglect that living in the small towns, to some extent, can be enjoyable. There is no denying that small towns usually have a healthier living environment, free from industrial and automobile pollutions. What is more, life in the small towns could be less stressful and people are more likely to take a relaxed step pace and really enjoy the life here. However, it is hasty to draw the conclusion only based on these advantages. (Why? These look like perfectly good reasons to me. If you deem it 'hasty' to draw any conclusion on such advantages, readers can deem your previous reasoning about big cities 'hasty' too, because you didn't present any persuasive argument on how these advantages are inferior to the advantages of living in big cities.)

In conclusion, as my above contention, there is no fixed conclusion on the issue of which one is better, the big city or the small town. And (正式写作中请避免用and, but或者so来开始句子) it is arbitrary to hastily emphasis either of them. However, as far as I am concerned, I choose  like the big city better than the small town, on the basis of its better job opportunities, more complete daily facilities, and better education prospects.

总结:

这是一篇很典型的非英语母语者的作文。论点不错，而且试图在使用很多高阶的词汇和语法 - 但是词汇使用不精确，很多词汇因为不明白其细微的含义 (nuance) 而没有正确使用，很多词组搭配是明显的中式表达；句法上不少句子有重复、繁琐、拗口的现象。

另外对于反面论点的处理需要加强，不是说简单地抛出一句 你说的不对 就叫反驳了。反驳是说理的一部分，依然要有理有据。