issue11 【文以载道二月小组】第4周第2次作业 flourish

flourishUID: 2569825

TOPIC: ISSUE11 - "All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."
WORDS: 502          TIME: 02:00:00          DATE: 2008-12-11 22:40:09

  Although there has been huge progress in the human society, people of today have been annoyed by the same social problems that has been hovering upon our ancestors since long ago. Is there anyway out for us to arrive at a better future without these persistent social problems? The speaker put forward the suggestion that a global university should be established in order to engage student toward solving the world's problems.
  The intention of eliminating some of the rooted problems in our society has come to the transformation of human nature and social structure. For instance, war has been torturing people throughout history and is supposed to be existent in a long run taking into consideration of the intense situation in some parts of the present world. In spite of the bitter lecture acquired from World War II, it is widely accepted in the subconscious that the last resort of settling a dispute turns out to be the war. For another instance, poverty, pervading every corner of the globe, no matter developed or developing countries, thriving or remote areas, is somewhat impossible to eradicate as long as there are individual indolence, inexorable competition, social welfare defects and many other related elements inducing the distress.
  In order to address these enduring problems that have afflicted human society, it is necessary to develop a global university as the cradle of potential capital for the long-term battle against these cosmopolitan questions. A global university would be able to offer an compatible atmosphere for discussions of all-range problems and also facilitate an cultural communication, idea exchange from all around the world. And with the support of all nations, it is also able to congregate the authorities and experts for a full-scale education. Furthermore, cultivating a future generation with a wide, thorough and profound view of the world, an university never cease to export innovative elites indispensible for the social reformation, it serves as the everlasting fountain of basic human resource for fighting against war, poverty, inequity and such other social problems.
  However, instituting a global university should not be the one and only resort for solving the problems as we could not solely rely on the future generation while making no efforts ourselves. Governments of all the countries have been striving for a stable, prosperous and harmonious society in all means. Scientists of all the fields have devoted themselves into their research for a better understanding and commanding of nature and ourselves. Artists of all the styles have been exerting themselves in illuminating and inspiriting human thoughts.
  In sum, I basically agree with the speaker’s assertion of trying to resolve the persistent social problems in the way of developing a global university supported by all nations, in respect that the university provides with the most sustainable force of combating the human-nature defects and social imperfections in the long run. While in the short run, the unremitting endeavor toward the contemporary pressing problems stands as the deciding factor of what kind of world we are living in.

doublesharkUID: 2439454

  Although there has been huge progress in the human society, people of today have been annoyed by the same social problems that has been hovering upon our ancestors since long ago. Is there anyway out for us to arrive at a better future without these persistent social problems? The speaker put forward the suggestion that a global university should be established in order to engage student toward solving the world's problems.

看完这一段我还不知道你的论点是什么，在这一段最后你应该提出自己的论点而不是speaker怎么说

  The intention of eliminating some of the rooted problems in our society has come to the transformation of human nature and social structure. For instance, war has been torturing people throughout history and is supposed to be existent in a long run taking into consideration of the intense situation in some parts of the present world. In spite of the bitter lecture acquired from World War II, it is widely accepted in the subconscious that the last resort of settling a dispute turns out to be the war. For another instance, poverty, pervading every corner of the globe, no matter developed or developing countries, thriving or remote areas, is somewhat impossible to eradicate as long as there are individual indolence, inexorable competition, social welfare defects and many other related elements inducing the distress.

这段要论证什么论点我没看懂。不知道是我水平太低还是你写的有问题。但是结构很好，语言也很好。

  In order to address these enduring problems that have afflicted human society, it is necessary to develop a global university as the cradle of potential capital for the long-term battle against these cosmopolitan questions. A global university would be able to offer an compatible atmosphere for discussions of all-range problems and also facilitate an cultural communication, idea exchange from all around the world. And with the support of all nations, it is also able to congregate the authorities and experts for a full-scale education. Furthermore, cultivating a future generation with a wide, thorough and profound view of the world, an university never cease to export innovative elites indispensible for the social reformation, it serves as the everlasting fountain of basic human resource for fighting against war, poverty, inequity and such other social problems.

提出支持建大学的论点

  However, instituting a global university should not be the one and only resort for solving the problems as we could not solely rely on the future generation while making no efforts ourselves. Governments of all the countries have been striving for a stable, prosperous and harmonious society in all means. Scientists of all the fields have devoted themselves into their research for a better understanding and commanding of nature and ourselves. Artists of all the styles have been exerting themselves in illuminating and inspiriting human thoughts.

反面说建大学不是万能的。可是红色那部分的作用不清楚，没有联系到本段的论点上。

  In sum, I basically agree with the speaker’s assertion of trying to resolve the persistent social problems in the way of developing a global university supported by all nations, in respect that the university provides with the most sustainable force of combating the human-nature defects and social imperfections in the long run. While in the short run, the unremitting endeavor toward the contemporary pressing problems stands as the deciding factor of what kind of world we are living in.

结尾重申论点。深化主题。很好

总结：
语言非常好。学习ing。段间联系过度很好
论证有些不全面。另外开头不提出论点很不好。