CRACK 9T 小组第二次作业——cleo0812

cleo0812UID：2302789

Writing:
Should governments spend more money on improving public transportation (buses, trains, subways)? Why? Use specific reasons and details to develop your essay.


Should government spend more money on improving public transportation? In my opinion, it determined by the situation of exsiting public transportation condition. If one city’s public transportation cannot meet the public demand, the city’s development progress will be blocked-thus government should spend more money on improving public transportation and vice versa.
First, the function of public transportation is crucial to the development of one city. Trains linked one city with neighbor cities, it is a carrier of communication and business between various culture, economy and society. Buses load large number of passengers to every hole and corner. Subways is the best choice of arriving at places on time owing to its punctual characteristic. We cannot image the situation of wasting time in traffic jam everyday or insulated with outside world due to the low quality of public transportation.
Secondly, although public transportation may not be the causal requirement of high development, it is the necessary condition to afford more rapid paces of society. Public transportation such as buses, trains, subways are the element factors to accelerate the economic progress. Observing developed city, we can find out that the higher level of standard of living, the more rapid paces of living. Take American for example, the traffic net pervades every corner of the country, the efficiency of country development benefits much from the convenient transportation.  
On the other hand, if a city’s public transportation is well-developed, the more money spending on improving public transportation just turn out to be a wasting. Overemphasising on public transportation may disturb the balance of the development of a city. After all, the main aim of government should not only improving public transportation but also other things such as education, security and the like.
In sum, public transportation condition is a vital element of one city’s development. It advances society’s economy, communication and so forth. However, if one city’s public transportation is well-developed, government should not overemphasise on the advancement of public transportation.
Speaking:
Do you prefer to live with roomates or you prefer to live by youself?

As for me, I prefer to live with roomates. There are two reasons.
First of all, we may encouter much these and other difficultes which cannot be solved by individual ability, roomates can provide help or advice assist us resolve these problems.
Secondly, we can training comminication ability with others for we are not independent individual but intercommunicating and interacting with others.
So I prefer to live with roomates.

lizzy1986UID：2281654

Writing:
Should governments spend more money on improving public transportation (buses, trains, subways)? Why? Use specific reasons and details to develop your essay.


Should government spend more money on improving public transportation? In my opinion, it determined by the situation of exsiting[existing] public transportation condition. If one city’s public transportation cannot meet the public demand, the city’s development progress will be blocked-thus government should spend more money on improving public transportation and vice versa.

First, the function of public transportation is crucial to the development of one city. Trains linked one city with neighbor cities, it is a carrier of communication and business between various culture, economy and society. Buses load large number of passengers to every hole and corner. Subways is the best choice of arriving at places on time owing to its punctual characteristic. We cannot image the situation of wasting time in traffic jam everyday or insulated with outside world due to the low quality of public transportation.

Secondly, although public transportation may not be the causal requirement of high development, it is the necessary condition to afford more rapid paces of society. Public transportation such as buses, trains, subways are the element factors to accelerate the economic progress. Observing developed city, we can find out that the higher level of standard of living, the more rapid paces of living. Take American for example, the traffic net pervades every corner of the country, the efficiency of country development benefits much from the convenient transportation.

On the other hand, if a city’s public transportation is well-developed, the more money spending on improving public transportation just turn out to be a wasting. Overemphasising on public transportation may disturb the balance of the development of a city. After all, the main aim of government should not only improving public transportation but also other things such as education, security and the like.

In sum, public transportation condition is a vital element of one city’s development. It advances society’s economy, communication and so forth. However, if one city’s public transportation is well-developed, government should not overemphasise on the advancement of public transportation.

小结：我觉得开头没有必要restate原题，虽然是换了问句的形式。OG里面特别提到不提倡太模式化的开头和结尾，你的结尾其实不模式化，但是开头我还是建议用开门见山的方法，问句形式有些用滥了。语言不错。然后一点就是觉得中间段每段的说理很清楚，但是段与段之间的连接不太强，感觉太过独立。

PS：很久没改过作文了。如果有什么没说对的地方，欢迎探讨。大家加油。


Speaking:
Do you prefer to live with roomates or you prefer to live by youself?

As for me, I prefer to live with roomates. There are two reasons.
First of all, we may encouter much these and other difficultes which cannot be solved by individual ability, roomates can provide help or advice assist us resolve these problems.
Secondly, we can training comminication ability with others for we are not independent individual but intercommunicating and interacting with others.
So I prefer to live with roomates.

听了录音，语速语音都不错的。但是研究了下文本，有少数拼写错误建议自己放到WORD里面去查，虽然口语看不出来，但有时侯记错了会影响发音。另外，有句子从句的使用稍微有一点语法错误，语法也是计分的一块，建议加以注意。很不错了，加油。


[ 本帖最后由 lizzy1986 于 2007-7-19 22:26 编辑 ]