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The letter [url=]suggest[/url][zj1] the club to include residents of this city, this suggestion can’t stand further examination although it seems reasonable by comparing nonresidents with residents and learning a lesson from the neighboring city. Argument 最好把题目的conclusion ,assumption和所列举的evidence都提出来。而且最好不要承认作者的合理性。因为这是argument。可以看一下北美范文，argu是有固定model的，不像issue，多用模版会被认为是作弊。文章开头和段落开头都可以用模版写作。
The claim about nonresidents in this letter is neither based on any [url=]analyzing[/url][zj2] nor supported by any evidence. The argument takes it for granted that nonresidents remain unfamiliar with the local issues. It may be true that they know little in some aspects such as living conditions. However, this is not the case in many other areas. Nonresidents employed by companies might know more about the business of the city than ordinary residents whose job is seldom related to the business. At the same time, nonresidents working for the government should grasp all kinds of policies as well as political situation in this city. It’s unjust to draw a conclusion [url=]not[/url][zj3] considering other information more important than living in the city.
The primary goal of the club is to improve the city by discussing local issues and taxes expenditures, which can be inferred from the argument, so that it is important to gather all of people who are devoted and [url=]contribute[/url][zj4] to the city building. Interests and passions to the public issues are determined mostly by characters, habits and thoughts of a person, not just by paying city taxes. A warm-hearted nonresident, who has spent his childhood in this city or is planning to move into the city after several years, may pay more attention to the future of the city and is ready to put forward more suggestions in the interests of the whole city, not just the area he lives. Meanwhile, paying taxes doesn’t mean know how to use taxes in the best way. People who have expertise in city building, developmental strategies--including some nonresidents-- are more likely to give wise opinions about taxes expenditures.
Nonresidents seldom join Civic Club in the neighboring city, thus the author infer that it doesn’t matter to put restriction on nonresidents. This reason has many obvious faults. First, the author omits the investigation on some details varying in different cities. Perhaps there are few nonresidents working in Elm City, for example as many as 50 persons. However, in Oak there may be much more nonresidents employed so that those who are willing to join the club might increase largely. On the other hand, perhaps among Elm’s nonresidents there are many women and old man who spend most of their time to take care of their own family, while in Oak young men who have much free time and energy take a much more percentage. And it is in the last ten years that only 25 nonresidents join Elm Club; it is possible that in a few years more and more nonresidents will join because of the changes in person as well as in the city.
In summary, it is not persuasive to draw the conclusion in the argument which actually deprives the right of nonresidents, it is a great mistake to exclusive all nonresidents out of the Civic Club no matter what contribution they have done and will do.最好再总结说明一下作者怎么做才能使上述问题更令人信服。 总评：这篇文章在语法，用词，和结构上都是很流畅的，感觉比较。清新易懂。举得例子也比较贴切。不过可能你刚刚接触argu所参考的资料也不是很多，对有一些写argu需要注意的问题还不是很了解，不过随着写作的深入，这种问题还是很容易解决的。
[zj1]suggests
[zj2]名词形式好像是analysis
[zj3]用without感觉比较好
[zj4]用被动语态。 | 
发表于 2007-7-25 20:26:01
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