jcf2008的作文贴

jcf2008UID: 2681015

22日作业 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Younger school children (ages five to ten) should be required to study art and music in addition to math, science, history and language.


本人基础不大好，望斧正~

There is a heated discussion in some education institutes and primary schools by the educational experts and parents. One of the questions under debate is that whether the younger school children (ages five to ten) should obtain the classes on art and music with math, science, history and language. Some people refute that these kind of class have few impact on their children's study marks. However, the information that I have collected for years leads me to believe that these courses really have directly and indirectly influence on the children's life. And I will explain myself for the following reasons.

First of all, it is the high time for children to learn music and art. Experts point out that children intend to acquire and master knowledge and skills more quickly than adults, especially at playing instruments, getting painting skills and remembering new words. Additionally, through the learning process, children can find what their special gifts is, singing, painting or calculation. In my opinion, attending these classes helps children to calculate their hobbies.

Secondly, music and art contribute a lot to form a child's character and personality. Take myself as an example, I start to drawing pictures since I was still 3, and my parents sent me to extra painting programs and encouraged me to let my imagination soar after finding my talent in painting. And their efforts even made me won some national competitions in painting. These prizes raised my self-confidence a lot to courage me to be the best of me. This is why I really appreciate my parents' support and convinced that children ought to take these classes.

Last but not least, art and music courses give a favor to board young students' imagination and creativity. As the famous saying of Einstein goes," Imagination is more important than knowledge." Having strong imagination dose not only help students to learn the subjects, including geology, physics, geography, architecture and astronomy , but also guides students to do research or be a more favorable employer by the boss. Imagination dose not contribute to a student, a family, and even society as a whole.

From what I have mentioned above, we can safely draw the conclusion that young students taking art and music courses benefits themselves much and even improves the human civilization as well.

haoannaUID: 2582245

~~

jcf2008UID: 2681015

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The best way to improve the quality of education in a country is to increase teachers' salaries.

9月23日 希望大家拍砖~~

There is a general discussion over education these days among the school principals and statesmen in the educational department. One of the questions under debate is whether increasing teachers' salaries is the best way to improve the quality of education. And with the growth of our nation's economy, more and more people began to agree with this idea. However, I hold my opinion that high salaries can not ensure the improvement of education.

It is true that raising the wages of teachers can help improve the education of a school. High wages appeal to high-educated teachers to come and even encourage people to become teachers. There is a tendency that graduate college students always put the salary in the first place when they choose positions. And due to the low salary, even the graduates from normal universities refute to be teachers. Therefore, schools face dangers of shortage of good young teachers. So increasing salaries of teachers really makes a difference on the developing schools.

In the last few decades, advances in economy and technology have dramatically changed both the living standards and the beliefs of people. And a growing number of persons, especially the adults, are coming to think highly of the money rather than the meanings and importance of jobs. If teachers are employed because of the payment, s/he may also teach the students the abnormal and wrong values of life. This may lead the students to a wrong direction and have a negative impact on the students' growth and the society as a whole.

In addition, schools, especially the colleges and universities, and governments can also raise the quality of education greatly by using the funds on renewing the teaching facilities and holding more extra meaningful activities for students. Thanks to the rapid developing technology and economy, college students have the opportunity and a favorable attitude towards studying and getting informed themselves in libraries or dorms rather than having classes in classrooms. Advanced schools take advantages of high-tech and convenient facilities, the interesting students’ activities, such as art weeks, and holding speeches of celebrities to improve education standards.

To sum up, high salary attracts teachers, but good teachers join a school not just for money. To make progress, what headmasters and principles need to do first is to change the atmosphere of schools, equip schools with high-tech facilities and set up more laboratories.

jcf2008UID: 2681015

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising is the most important cause of unhealthy eating habits

9月25作业~~  求拍ing~

As is often pointed out, advertising is a two-edged sword, which can do things both good and evil. And there is increasing numbers of people who complain that it is the essential cause of many unhealthy eating habits. However, the information I have collected these years leads me to believe that there are still many other reasons to this situation.

It is true that advertisements guide people to buy things inappropriately, especially the food. Many surveys show that the advertisements influence people's shopping choices directly or indirectly. We are encouraged to have snakes, junk food, and instant food instead of healthy raw food materials. Advertisements mislead us to buy those products for catching up with the fashion or thinking the food is delicious and nutrient. However, the customers, especially the kids and teenagers, lose fitness and shape though filling their mouse with the unhealthy food. We can see clearly that advertisements make bad impacts on the eating habits.

But is the advertisement the most important cause of the eating problem? The rapid developing industrialization also accounts to this concern. As our living pace has raised in the last decades, people, especially the city residents, get less private hours and spend most of their time on working and promotion. Without enough attention to their body, ambitious employers and employees both filled up their stomach with instant food, while managing their recent projects, business, and future plans. But they often suffer from diseases linked to the digesting system. It is the pressure of our society kills our healthy eating habits.

What's more, the food industry should be blamed too. Thanks to the progress of food industry, we prepare food much more conveniently than that in the old times. We can buy almost any food we want in the markets. But as our values towards money also changed dramatically, business men add more chemicals, which are bad for our fitness, into the food to make it more attractive and tasty.

From what I have mentioned above, we can safely draw the conclusion that the improvement of our society cultivates our unhealthy eating habits but not only the advertising. In order to change, we shall carry out stricter policies to the food industry, promote the global atmosphere, encourages people to concern more about this issue and so on.

anpeibooaUID: 2759070

There is a general discussion over education these days among the school principals and statesmen(statement) in the educational department. One of the questions under debate is whether increasing teachers' salaries is the best way to improve the quality of education. And with the growth of our nation's economy, more and more people began to agree with this idea. However, I hold my opinion that high salaries can not ensure the improvement of education. 2 x$ O: t" k% x# q9 n
It is true that raising the wages of teachers can help improve the education of a school. High wages appeal to high-educated teachers to work and even encourage people to become teachers. There is a tendency that graduate college students always put the salary in the first place when they choose positions. And due to the low salary, even the graduates from normal universities refute(refuse) to be teachers. Therefore, schools face dangers of shortage of good young teachers(new blood是不是更好呢？). So increasing salaries of teachers really makes a difference on the developing schools.（最好来个例子）
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In the last few decades, advances in economy and technology have dramatically（这个词好啊） changed both the living standards and the beliefs of people. And a growing number of persons, especially the adults, are coming to think highly of the money rather than the meanings and importance（significance更好些） of jobs. If teachers are employed because of the payment, s/he may also teach the students the abnormal and wrong values of life. This may lead the students to a wrong direction and have a negative impact on the students' growth and the society as a whole.（这句不错）
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In addition, schools, especially the colleges and universities, and governments can also raise(better更好，及物动词) the quality of education greatly by using the funds on renewing the teaching facilities and holding more extra meaningful activities for students. Thanks to the rapid developing technology and economy, college students have the opportunity and a favorable attitude towards studying and getting informed themselves in libraries or dorms rather than having classes in classrooms. （长短适宜）Advanced schools take advantages（benefits） of high-tech and convenient facilities, the interesting  activities, such as art weeks, and holding speeches of celebrities to improve education standards. （个人觉得列举一个更具体的完整例子更好）

To sum it up, high salary attracts teachers, but excellent teachers select a school not just for money. To make progress, what headmasters and principles need to do first is to change the atmosphere of schools, equip schools with high-tech facilities and set up more laboratories.
楼主思路清晰，就是举例太少，个别词出现次数太多了。尽量少用good这种口语词汇。

jcf2008UID: 2681015

5# anpeibooa
谢谢指点~~ 写东西经常会遇到词穷的情况，但写完后又能想起些更好的表达方式。。。很纠结

日落沙发UID: 2764889

本帖最后由 jcf2008 于 2010-9-23 23:34 编辑
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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The best way to improve the quality of education in a country is to increase teachers' salaries.

There is a general discussion over education these days among the school principals and statesmen in the educational department. One of the questions under debate is whether increasing teachers' salaries is the best way to improve the quality of education. And with the growth of our nation's economy, more and more people began to agree with this idea. However, I hold my opinion that high salaries can not (cannot) ensure the improvement of education.

It is true that raising the wages of teachers can help improve the education of a school. High wages appeal to high-educated teachers to come (可删) and even encourage people to become teachers. There is a tendency that graduate college students always put the salary in the first place when they choose positions. And due to the low salary, even the graduates from normal universities refute to be teachers. （觉得这两句话可以换一个说法。直接说，。。。“势利眼”看着很让人感慨世风日下。。。虽然，是事实。可以说，现在生活压力很大，特别是发展中国家比如中国，人们承受着很大的经济压力。没房子住，物价上涨，医疗费用高昂等等，导致人们迫于生活压力，不得不选择那些高薪的工作。以至于使教师这一工作时间长，工资低下的职业越来越不受欢迎。。。。） Therefore, schools face dangers of shortage of good young teachers. So increasing salaries of teachers really makes a difference on the developing schools.


In the last few decades, advances in economy and technology have dramatically changed both the living standards and the beliefs of people. And a growing number of persons, especially the adults, are coming to think highly of the money rather than the meanings and importance of jobs. If teachers are employed because of the payment, s/he may also teach the students the abnormal and wrong values of life. This may lead the students to a wrong direction and have a negative impact on the students' growth and the society as a whole.9 Q$ F+ B' u- S; n

In addition, schools, especially the colleges and universities, and governments can also raise the quality of education greatly by using the funds on renewing the teaching facilities and holding more extra meaningful activities for students. Thanks to the rapid developing technology and economy, college students have the opportunity and a favorable attitude towards studying and getting informed themselves in libraries or dorms rather than having classes in classrooms. Advanced schools take advantages of high-tech and convenient facilities, the interesting students’ activities, such as art weeks, and holding speeches of celebrities to improve education standards. （额，，，我觉得图书馆是死的，人是活的。。。。书本上的东西，毕竟尘封了数年以上。光有图书馆是不够的。有，学生也不一定知道怎么利用好。老师的作用还是很强大的。好老师是有启迪性的，可以教会我们怎么去学习。）

To sum up, high salary attracts teachers, but good teachers join a school not just for money. To make progress, what headmasters and principles need to do first is to change the atmosphere of schools, equip schools with high-tech facilities and set up more laboratories.
楼主语言还行，只是论证不是太充分。多练几篇会好些的。
加油！O(∩_∩)O~
3# jcf2008

jcf2008UID: 2681015

7# 日落沙发
谢谢日落的点评~~ 很中肯~
多练练希望能解决那些不知如何下手的题

jcf2008UID: 2681015

Many college students majored in art fields complain that they are tired of learning scientific subjects. They acclaim that those subjects are useless to them. And this issue has become a public concern these days. However, the information I have collected these years leads me that have a different attitude towards it.

Taking basic science courses contributes to better adjustment to the rapidly developed society. It is general acknowledged that the modern society needs its people to have a wide variety of knowledge, especially science and technology. Imagine that an ancient people comes from the 16th century knowing nothing about cars, televisions, cell phones and even the elevators in tall buildings. She or he must be scared and does not know how to survive in this modern world. So it is safely to say that hardly can you keep up with the progress of modern society without knowing any basic technology or science.

What's more, science classes improve our prudent and logical thinking. No one can deny that studying science requires us to consider questions more logically and rationally. Scientists and engineers are commonly recognized to be not only smart but also prudent, reasonable, and thinking clearly. Take astronomers for example, this group of people are famous for their wonderful work, such as rockets, satellites and spacecrafts. These high-techs must be designed and made 100 percent correctly, so that they can operate safely. It is the science that promotes human's prudence and sense of logic.

It is also true that, nowadays, the saddle of a normal student is already too heavy to bear. As time goes by, college students have to learn more and more subjects and be instructed amount of information to put them in a more beneficial position in the job market when they are graduated. They are undoubtedly to be upset and annoyed when they are asked to take additional education programs which may have little association with their future work. This policy may add more burdens and pressures on their backs.

In conclusion, taking basic science courses do have drawbacks to the college students, but the advantages of this policy still far overweight the disadvantages. The students will benefit from the scientific knowledge directly and indirectly in their life time.

fermaighUID: 2236755

Many college students majored in art fields complain that they are tired of learning scientific subjects. They acclaim that those subjects are useless to them. And this issue has become a public concern these days. However, the information I have collected these years leads me that have a different attitude towards it.

Taking basic science courses contributes to better adjustment to the rapidly developed(developing) society. It is general acknowledged that the modern society needs its people to have a wide variety of knowledge, especially science and technology. Imagine that an ancient people comes from the 16th century knowing nothing about cars, televisions, cell phones and even the elevator(s) in tall buildings. S/he(he or she) must be scared and do(es) not (know) how to survive in this modern world. So it is safely to say that hardly can you keep up with the progress of modern society without knowing any basic technology or science.(good sentence!)

What's more, science classes improve our prudent(advisability?!) and logic thinking. No one can deny that studying science requires us to consider questions more logically and rationally. Scientists and engineers are commonly recognized to be not only smart but also prudent, reasonable, and thinking clearly. Take astronomers for example, this group of people are famous for their wonderful work, such as (dealing with) rockets, satellites and spacecrafts. These high-techs must be designed and made 100 percent correctly(correct), so that they can operate safely(work steadily). It is the science that promotes human's prudence and sense of loge.

It is also true that, nowadays, the saddle of a normal student is already too heavy to bear. As time goes by, college students have to learn more and more subjects and be instructed amount of information to put them in a more beneficial position in the job market when(after) they are graduated. They are undoubtedly to be upset and annoyed when they are asked to take additional education programs which may have little association with their future work. This policy may add more burdens and pressures on their backs. ( Whether the students should take the course nor not?）

In conclusion, taking basic science courses do have drawbacks to the college students, but the advantages of this policy still far overweight the disadvantages. The students will benefit from the scientific knowledge directly and indirectly in their life time.

一家之词而已   句子表述可以在丰富些   加油  共同进步！

jcf2008UID: 2681015

9月30日作文
As people's working pressure and economical level raises, growing numbers of people take travelling into consideration as a way to lose pressure gain happiness. Some travelers claim that going abroad is more beneficial than having trips at home. However, I can hardly agree with that for the following reasons.

Most of all, travelling at home contributes to improving the local economy. It is commonly thought that tourism is an essential industry to the local government. People spend quite a lot of money on hotels, transportation, shopping malls, and restaurants as well. Besides, this industry also increases more positions, such as guides, sellers and even cleaners. For example, there are many towns and cities are established and the dwellers are much better off than before since the tourism has become a major industry. It is clearly to see that our choice of travelling at home helps the local residents and governments benefit a lot from the tourism.

Secondly, tourism drives the city planning program in poorer areas. According to some recent surveys, most tourists show a more favorable attitude towards the well constructed travelling cities. So local governments go into raptures at the merely mention at city planning. Beautiful parks, fantastic shopping centers and well organized public transportation system, as they maintain, pull the local economy up. They set funds to make their city modern and attractive to more tourists and residents. In order to appeals more travelers, the money spending on the city and its citizens really make a difference.

Finally, having vacations at home also broadens our knowledge of a variety of the civilizations and customs of our own country. Take myself for example, my parents and I always take trips to different provinces in our country. The native dwellers who live in the tropic areas, in desserts, and near the oceans. Due to the locations, almost nothing, but the language, they share. These experiences make me have a better understanding of people in different regions with different backgrounds. We can understand each other better and improve harmonious society's progress, thanks to native travels.

To sum up, from what I have mentioned above, we can safely draw the conclusion that taking travels in our own country benefits more than going abroad to ourselves and even the society as a whole.

towntownUID: 2907332

Many college students majored in art fields complain that they are tired of learning scientific subjects. They claim acclaim不是欢呼的意思么？也有认为的意思吗？若确定给个回复谢谢that those subjects are useless to them. And this issue has become a public concern these days. However, the information I have collected these years leads me to have a different attitude towards it.
Taking basic science courses contributes to better adjustment to the rapidly developed society. It is general acknowledged that the modern society needs its people to have a wide variety of knowledge, especially science and technology. Imagine that an ancient person（你是说人的意思不是民族的意思吧？但其实古人最好说成the ancients这样你也避免了后面的she or he） coming from the 16th century knows nothing about （这样改突出本句重点）cars, televisions, cell phones and even the elevators in tall buildings. She or he must be scared and does not know how to survive in this modern world. （我喜欢你这段穿越文）So it is safely to say that hardly could虚拟语气 you keep up with the progress of modern society without knowing any basic technology or science. + L8 V4 g! }4 A: }, m# M" Z$ W
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What's more, science classes improve our prudent and logical thinking. No one can deny that studying science requires us to consider questions more logically and rationally. Scientists and engineers are commonly recognized to be not only smart but also prudent, reasonable, and thinking clearly. Take astronomers for example, this group of people is 主语是group famous for wonderful work, such as rockets, satellites and spacecrafts. These high-techs must be designed and made(找个复杂点的词换下fabricated) 100 percent correctly, so that they can operate safely. It is the science that promotes human's prudence and sense of logic.
It is also true that, nowadays, the saddle of a normal student is already too heavy to bear. As time goes by, college students have to learn more and more subjects and be instructed amount of information to put them in a more beneficial position in the job market when they are graduated. They are undoubtedly to be upset and annoyed when they are asked to take additional education programs which may have little association with their future work. This policy may add more burdens and pressures on their backs.
In conclusion, taking basic science courses do have drawbacks to the college students, but the advantages of this policy still far overweight the disadvantages. The students will benefit from the scientific knowledge directly and indirectly in their life time.

jcf2008UID: 2681015

12# towntown acclaim 是我打错字了，抱歉。写作还有很多毛病不足，谢谢指出。单词量不太大，有些表达有误导致叙述不清。 我会继续努力改进的！再感谢一次

jcf2008UID: 2681015

写得挺糟糕的，大家猛批吧
As the fast development of the national economy, an increasing number of people is becoming to considering how to get rid of the stress. Some claim that spending time alone is the best way to relieve stress. However, the information I have collected for years leads me to believe that staying with others, such as our parents, friends, lovers and phycologists, is a far better way to solve this problem.

It is true that some people who are introverted prefer to figure out their questions alone. They chose to watch television, read books, or work out alone, or with their cats. They assume that that will give them private time to thinking about the barrirs they are facing and tragedies they are undergoing and in that way they can get released from presure. Take my friend Ann as example, whatever she comfront, she will never let her parents, teachers, and her friends, us, know. She figures out those difficulties by reading some novels or watching some comedies alone. And she always makes it. We can see that some people do not need others' help to overcome hardnesses and feel released.

No one can deny that encouragement and concerns from others comfort us. When facd with troubles, as a survey shows, there are more than 60 percent of people trying to talk with others to look for suggestions to problems and comfort from the others. Phycologists point out that communication with ohter people can directly and indirectly influence people's emotion and attitude towards life. It is not a rare case that soft words from our mothers, closed friends or even the warm-hearted strangers comfort and encourage us to live life in a more positive way. And we become harsher in the harsh world. It is clear that optimistical communication energy people struggling with destine and pressure.

Last but not least, getting in touch and talking about the presure we have with people help us recover more quickly and totally. For instance, usually I will take a few days or weeks to wondering the questions on my life or study. But if I turn to my parents or my friends, it will just cost me one or two days, even 2 hours will be enough. This really save me from worrying on myself. Additionally, their suggestion is sometimes very practical and useful. Chatting with the people who cares about you can guide you to a brighter way of life.

To sum up, from what I have mentioned above, we can safely draw the conclusion that searching for help from the closed people may be a better way to relieve stress when compared with spending time alone.

cathyxinUID: 2746039

As（with 更好，要不是就改成as the economy developes fast….） the fast development of the national economy, an increasing number of people is （用完成时是不是更好呢，而且是复数）becoming to considering(consider) how to get rid of the stress. Some claim that spending time alone is the best way to relieve stress. However, the information I have collected for years leads me to believe that staying with others, such as our parents, friends, lovers and phycologists, is a far better way to solve this problem.3 C$ B2 b! s) q* D/ _
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It is true that some people who are introverted prefer to figure out their questions alone. They chose(choose) to watch television, read books, or work out alone, or （加个动词如stay啥的）with their cats. They assume that that will give them private time to thinking（think） about the barriers they are facing and tragedies they are undergoing and in that way(so that更简洁吧) they can get released from pressure. Take my friend Ann as example, whatever she confronts, she will never let her parents, teachers, and her friends, us(多余的额), know. She figures out(换个其他词呗，如handle,settle,solve…) those difficulties by reading some novels or watching some comedies alone. And she always makes it. We can see that some people do not need others' help to overcome harnesses and feel released.! ~! Q" t. Z) N1 u' |
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No one can deny that encouragement and concerns from others comfort us. When faced with troubles, as a survey shows, there are more than 60 percent of people trying to talk with others to look for suggestions to problems and comfort from the others(前后主谓不一致哈，要不前面改为when we face, 要不就把后面的there are结构去掉). Phycologists point out that communication with other people can directly and indirectly influence people's emotion and attitude towards life. It is not a rare case that soft words from our mothers, closed friends or even the warm-hearted strangers comfort and encourage us to live life in a more positive way. And we become harsher in the harsh world（换个其他形容词吧，harsh貌似出现几次了。。。）. It is clear that optimistic communication energy（encourage?） people struggling with destine and pressure(这句话没太看懂。。。encourage people to struggle with destiny and pressure)

Last but not least, getting in touch and talking about the pressure we have help us recover more quickly and totally (thoroughly更好). For instance, usually I will take a few days or weeks to wondering (换成思考的词，wonder 后面一般有具体的问题内容) the questions on my life or study. But if I turn to my parents or my friends（for help）, it will just cost me one or two days, even 2 hours will be enough. This really save (rescue) me from worrying on(about) myself. Additionally, their suggestion is sometimes very practical and useful. Chatting with the people who cares about you can guide you to a brighter way of life(直接改为life).

! D
To sum up, from what I have mentioned above, we can safely draw the conclusion that searching for help from the closed people may be a better way to relieve stress when compared with spending time alone.

文章例子举得还不错，比较实际，但是对语言和结构的把握还要加强哦，多用些不一样的词和句子结构，尽量减少重复的内容。呵呵，加油哈~~