issue154 yurong84，互拍啊！

yurong84UID: 2120087

Issue154  让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！]

------题目------
Both parents and communities must be involved in the local schools. Education is too important to leave solely to a group of professional educators.

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syllabus:

1\ positive:
Parents and communities are need, for they can provide a much longer and profound eduction to an individual.
a. Parents can give the enlightening eduction as well as a more profound and more directly one.
b. society provide a more completely education which can last for life time,
c. they can function as supervisor.

2\negative:
a. they may have good will but lack the ability.
b. parents may bring something wrong to the education.
c. communities, espexially the govenment may add their disire into the education

说实话，
写着写着就偏离原来的提纲了……
不过还能作为参考的
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------正文------
Is it necessary to involve both parents and communities into the local schools? Basically, I agree with the arguer's point that education can't be managed only by the professional educators but should be recognized as an affair of the whole society, however, I still hold some reservation about the participation of students' parents as well as the communities.

To start with, we should give a proper definition to education, as all the great pedagogues always claim, that to educate an individual is a task much more profound than the action of merely informing. Educators have the responsibility to teach a student with knowledge and skills, and more important, the ability to think and the art of living. These work is so miscellaneous(：P——这个是我查到的，不知道有没有更简单的表述) that it can never be handled adequately only by the educators in the local schools. As a result parents and communities are required to give a hand to the realization of education, as they can make up for many drawbacks in the system of school education, which is to their own advantages as well.

First of all, parents and communities can provide the students with a more complete and profound education, which cannot be achieved during the several school hours or from the numerable educators. On the one hand, parents can communicate with their children more directly because of the long-established trust between them. At the same time, children are more willingly to follow the behavior of their relatives, as what the human nature directs. One the other hand, when education comes to the community lever, its background as well the extension as can be broadened significantly. For example, students may get information from the public voice about the situation of the whole world and get into touch with many kinds of people as workers, soldiers through some practical activities provided by the communities, say, the military training and the voluntary service. In addition, they can also learn the capability to make a living by themselves through the study of the outside world, with all kinds of people, so as to avoid be limited in their ivory tower.

Another important function, of the anticipating of parents and communities, lies in the fact that they can act as supervisors, who will point out the inefficient and unreasonable aspects of the education as well as suggest a better method. By this mean, the educators have to carry on their work more carefully when it was open to the public eyes.

Yet, the involving of parents and communities might also acts as an obstacle in some cases, because they’re not experts indeed, and may lead the student to an opposite direction.

Admittedly, most parents have a good expectation upon the education of their children, but sometimes they just lack the ability. Some parents would like to thrust their wrong opinions on the child either due to their unawareness or unwillingness. For instance, a boy may learn the bad habit of smoking for his father’s always doing so, while a girl might develop a wasteful lifestyle since her mother likes it. What's more, some parents misunderstand the goal of some actions of the school and thus hamper these works.

When it refers to the communities, more potential risks emerges, for some statesmen or even the whole government may have their own plan, which, if put into practice, may not improve the education at all but do good to other people. A proper example to illustrate this point is the Nazi’s cultural invasion into France- the moment they forced the local schools to teach Germany instead of French, in order to efface the children’s memory of their motherland, the real meaning of education was undermined.

To sum up, the suggestion to involve the parents and communities into education is right since it can provide a more diverse and profound knowledge to the students, and can oversee the educators. But on a second thought, this advice must be put into practice carefully, or else, it may act as an obstacle to our education rather than a propeller.

foreveraUID: 202035

占座,一会独子疼好一点的时候就马上来拍....

foreveraUID: 202035

Is it necessary to involve both parents and communities into the local schools? Basically, I agree with the arguer's point that education can't be managed only by the professional educators but should be recognized as an affair of the whole society, however, I still hold some reservation about 很好的句子,学习ingthe participation of students' parents as well as the communities.很不错的开头

To start with, we should give a proper definition to education, as all the great pedagogues always claim, that to educate an individual is a task much more profound than the action of merely informing.好象并没有给出明确的definition吧 Educators have the responsibility to teach a student with knowledge and skills, and more important importantly, the ability to think and the art of living. These work is so miscellaneous 还是没看懂这个词在这里是什么意思(：P——这个是我查到的，不知道有没有更简单的表述) that it can never be handled adequately only by the educators in the local schools. As a result parents and communities are required to give a hand to the realization of education, as they can make up for many drawbacks in the system of school education, which is to their own advantages as well.论证的不错,不过作为就给一个definition的导引段,似乎太罗嗦了一点。

First of all, parents and communities can provide the students with a more complete and profound education, which cannot be achieved during the several school hours or from the numerable educators. On the one hand, parents can communicate with their children more directly because of the long-established trust between them. At the same time, children are more willingly to follow the behavior of their relatives, as what the human nature directs. One the other hand, when education comes to the community lever, its background as well the extension as can be broadened significantly. For example, students may get information from the public voice about the situation of the whole world and get into touch with many kinds of people as workers, soldiers through some practical activities provided by the communities, say, the military training and the voluntary service. 这个句子有点太长了,看起来有点费劲.而且那个say是什么意思?In addition如果有3个方面的话前面最好就不要用on one hand和on the other hand了, they can also learn the capability to make a living by themselves through the study of the outside world, with all kinds of people, so as to avoid be limited in their ivory tower.写的很不错,不过就是感觉有点罗嗦

Another important function, of the anticipating of parents and communities, lies in the fact that they can act as supervisors, who will point out the inefficient and unreasonable aspects of the education as well as suggest a better method.还是有点长 By this mean, the educators have to carry on their work more carefully when it was open to the public eyes.

Yet, the involving of parents and communities might also acts as an obstacle in some cases, because they’re not experts indeed, and may lead the student to an opposite direction. 换成mislead the students会简洁一点.
Admittedly, most parents have a good expectation upon the education of their children, but sometimes they just lack the ability. Some parents would like to thrust 这个词虽然很生动,但是用的不好，thrust感觉有强加于孩子身上的感觉,而事实上是孩子自己受的影响,并没有被强迫. their wrong opinions on the child either due to their unawareness or unwillingness. For instance, a boy may learn the bad habit of smoking for his father’s always doing so, while a girl might develop a wasteful lifestyle since her mother likes it. What's more, some parents misunderstand the goal of some actions of the school and thus hamper these works.

When it refers to the communities, more potential risks emerges, for some statesmen or even the whole government may have their own plan, which, if put into practice, may not improve the education at all but do good to other people还是太长呀. A proper example to illustrate this point is the Nazi’s cultural invasion into France- the moment they forced the local schools to teach Germany instead of French, in order to efface the children’s memory of their motherland, the real meaning of education was undermined. 例子很好

To sum up, the suggestion to involve the parents and communities into education is right since it can provide a more diverse and profound knowledge to the students, and can oversee the educators. But on a second thought, this advice must be put into practice carefully, or else, it may act as an obstacle to our education rather than a propeller.


整体来说写的很不错,不过每段的TS都太冗长,而且从全篇上看用了大量的篇幅去论证一个在你首段中不是重点的观点,前半部分的文字也有些罗嗦,而真正需要强调的却部分笔墨却不够了...显的整篇文章比例失调....你认为呢?

蓉蓉MM的文字驾御能力的确非常强,赞一个!!!;)

俺的issue48
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=315677

[ Last edited by forevera on 2005-8-10 at 23:43 ]