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Issue51 Kito小组作业贴 多谢修改^-^
【题目】Issue51(2005年2-9月总频90次)
Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.
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【翻译】教育只有被专门设计来满足每一个学生个人需求和兴趣的时候才是真正有效率的。
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【提纲】
1. 初等教育阶段一些基础知识的培养需要人们的引导,而不能以个人兴趣为准。一方面,这个时候孩子可能不清楚自己的兴趣,而且很多基础科目如数学等等孩子都不太喜欢,不喜欢不意味着可以不学。
2. 另一方面,孩子可能不会正常的社会化,给自身和社会都带来麻烦。(兴趣可能有问题)
3. 而对于高等教育,虽然此时人的知识储备已经达到一定水平,并且也有了判断是非的能力,兴趣在大学的学习中也的确很重要,但仍需要社会的进一步引导,使他们学会做人。
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【正文】
Prior to my analysis, I have to concede that the individual needs and interests, to certain extent, serve as an incentive for students to study and develop various skills. However, I tend to disagree with the author’s claim that education will be truly effective only by specifically designing the courses to meet individual needs and interests. I would discuss this issue from two aspects as below.(开起来开头似乎成了风格,挺好的! )
First of all, on the basic(用elemental我觉得好些) educational level when students are generally children (who just receive formal education表达刚上学的孩子这个含义,这句话不够native, 可以说who begin to go to school to get an education), they need the direction (directions,这些最好用复数,后面的advice也一样)and advice from their parents, schools and communities. For one thing, since children are too young to exactly tell right from wrong, good from evil and even like from dislike, they may just follow others’ examples rather than develop their genuine interests. (For example,(a) children( child whose name is ……) would(be) likely to want a piano not because they like music but because they just find that his friend Tommy just got one in the bedroom.)(这句话里的代词His 和 they 用得不一致) In fact, children are easily affected by the surroundings and temporarily appear to desire something which they may actually dislike. Apart from that concern(,) should children be educated according to their own interests and needs? Certainly not. Take the basic subjects such as Mathematics, physics, chemistry, etc for instance,( consider if children who hate these courses are allowed to give up studying these subjects, )(这句话改一下: consider the children who hate these courses and they are allowed to give up studying them), then how they can go through more advanced education. At this point, the education only focus on children’s inclinations is presumed to be a failure.(段落整体的结构很好,论证也很完善,在句子上要注意小问题。)
For another thing, when referring to education, socialization of the children turns out to be crucial and significant in the healthy development of next generation and even (the) future society. Children who are taught according to their own favors tend to be in whimsical characteristics which may act as an obstacle stifling normal relationships and cooperation with others. That’s why so many people are against the home education which separate(s) the students from society and cultivate children into fully intellectual in brain but poorly developed in social skills and morality. It is not hard to imagine years later when this kind of children age they may create many wonders in sciences field, however they may bring about terrible crisis in ethics by casually cloning human beings.( 上文只是说了,home education 把孩子叫成brain intellectual ,没有特指示intellectual in science 所以我觉得后面的和前面的那句有点衔接不上) In that case, how people can say that the education is truly effective when catering to the needs and interests of students.
While on the advanced educational stage, although students grows up with knowledge comparatively affluent, ability(able) to judge events happening in the world and also knowing what they themselves really want and favor, they nevertheless need the help of their teachers and formal education. Admittedly, the interests being taken into account by education system, the students would feel centered and appreciated and thus motivated to study. Actually, the interests are indispensable in colleges( and universities insofar as the disciplines ( --------) some of which are difficult or boring call for the students who are really interested in them,) (这句话写得太长,表达上有问题,或者漏了标点,请教?) otherwise they may waste precious time and also make education ineffectively. However, though in the colleges and universities interests are so important, we should still realize that colleges are not only a place where students obtain professional knowledge but also a place where students are molded to be a man with perseverance, courage, loyalty and so forth. In order to gain those virtues, only relying on meeting the needs and interests seems to be inadequate.
To sum up, before assessing the issue of education, people should consider it comprehensively and intellectually. After all, this crucial issue has great things to do with our next generation and our future society.
文章总体上还是挺好的,但是举例有些单薄,对于例子的使用还不够充分,显得文章说理过多,举例过少,中心虽然突出但是还需要加强。继续努力!!
A Za A Za, Fighting!! |
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