[phoenix] issue130 第一次作业 by 5号

kusinerlooUID: 2608701

TOPIC: ISSUE130 - "How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society."

现在孩子的社会化程度决定了社会的命运。可惜的是，我们还没有学会教孩子怎么样去建设一个更好的社会。

提纲：

基本反对

孩子的社会化程度确实在一定程度上影响社会的发展（可视为让步）

孩子的社会化程度并不是决定社会发展的唯一因素

反对Speaker第二个观点，我们的社会正在变得更好

The speaker asserts that the destiny of society depends on how children are socialized, and we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society. In my view, both of the speaker’s claims have no ample evidence to support.

Admittedly, a powerfully socialized individual have a positive effect on the social environment around, who usually tend to communicate with others in harmony. Consider, socialized process of children always occur in schools, where children learn to cooperate, communicate, and express, and where let children know the abysmal results of illegality, bullying, and other anti-social behavior. Education of school ensure to most children grow up to be good, ethical, and law-abiding citizens, as well as respectful member of society to contribute to the destiny of society. We can easily conclude that sufficient opportunities for healthy interaction with others is necessary for render certain children’s growth.

However, most crooks, criminals and other anti-social individuals are socialized completely, but they can do nothing for our society except chaos. In my observation, this is because socialization is only one factor influencing an individual’s moral character, and it’s not the most important one. Consider prominent individual who have contributed profoundly to a better society. Stephen Hawking’s contribution primarily from his passion for the science and his will, in spite of he have trouble in communicate with others. Human’s character cultivation hinge on several factors, including culture influence, religious upbringing, parental influence and so on, socialized is indispensable but not the whole.

Consider the speaker’s second claim that we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring a better society. As a rule, we define “a better society” as one characterized by more respect for individual rights and freedom, more cooperation across different culture and national boundaries and more harmony between each other. And we glad to find this situation: our society has become better in the last 50 years. The most recent half-century has seen an increasing sensitivity in our society toward ensuring public health by policing the food and drug industries and by protecting our natural environment. In the December 2009, the U.N. Climate Change conference opened in Copenhagen, Denmark Monday with some 15,000 delegates and observers from nearly 200 countries attending what is being billed the last best chance for an agreement to combat global warming. In the other side, we are becoming more sensitive to, and respectful of, the rights of women, homosexuals, various ethnic and racial groups, and mentally and physically challenged individuals. In short, Human’s society is unprecedentedly prosperous, the speaker do not consider the empirical evidence and give a wrong answer.

In sum, the destiny of society rest on the shoulder of our children, when it comes to whether a child grows up to contribute to construct a better society, socialized is a important factor but not the whole, other factors also should be thinking awfully. And in my observation, human’s society is unprecedentedly prosperous, it must be steadily evolving into a more civilized, respectful and tolerant one. In the final analysis, I absolutely disagree with the whole viewpoint of the speaker’s claim.

86145787UID: 2672301

The speaker asserts that the destiny of society depends on how children are socialized, and we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society. In my view, both of the speaker’s claims have no ample evidence to support.

Admittedly, a powerfully socialized individual have a positive effect on the social environment around, who usually tend to communicate with others in harmony. Consider, socialized process of children always occur in schools, where children learn to cooperate, communicate, and express, and where let children know the abysmal results of illegality, bullying, and other anti-social behavior.
（个人认为这句话写得很出色）Education of school ensure to most children grow up to be good, ethical, and law-abiding citizens, as well as respectful member of society to contribute to the destiny of society. We can easily conclude that sufficient opportunities for healthy interaction with others is necessary for render certain children’s growth.

However, most crooks, criminals and other anti-social individuals are socialized completely, but they can do nothing for our society except chaos. In my observation, this is because socialization is only one factor influencing an individual’s moral character, and it’s not the most important one. (感觉上句 的逻辑关系不是很好，或许用ALTHOUGH更妥当)Consider prominent individual who have contributed profoundly to a better society. Stephen Hawking’s contribution primarily from his passion for the science and his will, in spite of he have trouble in communicate with others. Human’s character cultivation hinge on several factors, including culture influence, religious upbringing, parental influence and so on, socialized（不宜做主语） is indispensable but not the whole.

Consider the speaker’s second claim that we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring a better society. As a rule, we define “a better society” as one characterized（应该用名词character） by more respect for individual rights and freedom, more cooperation across different culture and national boundaries and more harmony between each other. And we glad to find this situation: our society has become better in the last 50 years. The most recent half-century(时间状语不应做主语) has seen an increasing sensitivity in our society toward ensuring public health by policing food and drug industries and by protecting our natural environment. In the December 2009, the U.N. Climate Change conference opened in Copenhagen, Denmark Monday with some 15,000 delegates and observers from nearly 200 countries attending what is being billed the last best chance for an agreement to combat global warming. In the other side, we are becoming more sensitive to, and respectful of, the rights of women, homosexuals, various ethnic and racial groups, and mentally and physically challenged individuals.（个人认为这句话写得好） In short, Human’s society is unprecedentedly prosperous, the speaker do not consider the empirical evidence and give a wrong answer.

In sum, the destiny of society rest on the shoulder of our children, when it comes to whether a child grows up to contribute to construct a better society, socialized is a important factor but not the whole, other factors also should be thinking awfully. And in my observation, human’s society is unprecedentedly prosperous, it must be steadily evolving into a more civilized, respectful and tolerant one. In the final analysis, I absolutely disagree with the whole viewpoint of the speaker’s claim.

作者的词汇量让人佩服，让步的论证手法也让人很受启发。不过有些句子在逻辑和语法上有问题，第三段的论证说服力或许还应该加强。


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