新手求指导，issue and argument

zhangjunzjUID: 2658970

TOPIC: ISSUE156 - "Choice is an illusion. In reality, our lives are controlled by the society in which we live."
WORDS: 582
TIME: 00:41:50
DATE: 2010/7/16 20:18:22

Is it true as the speaker asserts that choice is merely an illusion and we do not have any choices in our real societal live? In my opinion, although people mostly do not contend with their choices, there are always some choices for them to choose.

To begin with, I want to make it clear that what is the meaning of choice.In our daily life and society experiences, choice might be a kind of chance to take some actions or not, or it might be some opportunities cost at the expense of other opportunities. In this respect, choice is not an illusion and we can choose what we think better under the circumstance that all these choices are not so good as we expected. Although in all bad choices that we have to face, we still have a chance to choose a better one among these bad choices and that would lead us an illusion that we have no chance to choose except these all bad choices. From human emotion, that is understandable, after all, as rational person, we all want some good choices which would satisfy us rather than some bad situations that we have to face and suffer. However , when it comes to bad situations, choices seem not so satisfying for neither of these bad choice would change situations better or be beneficial to us, so we it would lead an illusion that we have no any choice and might complain about that. In other words, no good choice does not equal to no any choice, even the among the bad choices we can find a better one. Although in some certain cases, no matter what bad choice we choose would lead us to loose we still have a chance to choose one that loose us least, in this way, we could do our best by choosing one proper strategy to reduce our lose to the least.

In the real societal life, as the limitations of some factors that we can not change, such as our physical abilities, our parental social status and the length of our lives, there are also many choices for us to choose and most of us could control our lives under some specific conditions. A famous writer's example comes to my mind immediately, that is Helen Keller. As most people know, American female writer Helen Keller was born blind, at the time, her life seemed hopeless and many people did not expect that she would have such a great success in the world's literature. Choices were rare and even no choices for her in some people's eyes because in that period blind people were regarded able to do almost nothing contribution to the society. However, even under such a bad condition of physical disability Helen still made her choice to be a writer and with her efforts of trial-and- error that much more than normal people, she finally realized her dreams as a writer and achieved great success. From Helen's case, we can learn that no good choices do not equal to no any choices, even choices that do not regarded as good ones could be good ones for us under some conditions if we do our best to achieve and finish that choices.

In sum, I think that although in our daily lives, most choice we have to face are not good ones we have expected, many other substitutes still remain for us to choose. If we do our best and achieve that so-called less good choices well , in most cases we could control our own lives in reality.



TOPIC: ARGUMENT226 - The following appeared as part of a memo from the manager of an automobile manufacturing company.

"Because the demand for our automobiles is expected to increase dramatically, we need to open a new manufacturing plant as soon as possible in order to continue to thrive. Our marketing projections indicate that 80 million people will want to buy our automobiles, yet our existing plant can only produce 40 million automobiles. The new plant can be opened on a part-time basis, with workers from our existing site rotating responsibilities, until an operational staff can be trained. A major airplane manufacturer was extremely successful using this part-time rotating strategy when it opened its new plant five years ago."
WORDS: 461
TIME: 00:30:00
DATE: 2010/7/13 21:15:34

The memo conclude that their company would need to open a new manufacturing plant in order to continue to thrive due to the demand for their automobiles is expected to increase dramatically. To support the conclusion the author cite the indication of some projections that 80 million people will want by their cars and their existing plant can only produce 40 million cars. The author also cites the successful example of an airplane manufacturer to substantiate the possibility of their part-time rotating strategy before their new plant' operational staff can be trained. However , in my view, the author's argument flawed in several aspects as it stands.

To begin with , the author cites the projection which indicates that 80 million people will want to buy their automobiles and their existing plant could not satisfy such a large demand, thus a new plant will be needed to amount to the demand. Nevertheless , the author fails to provide any statistical or evidence to make sure that their consumption would surely to increase, it is entirely that the projection 80 million people would buy their cars is just their own good expectation which relies on no survey or market analysis .Or although the projection is true that it is indeed 80 people will want to buy their automobiles, however, people want to buy does not equivalent to that they would surly to buy , it is entirely possible that they also want to by other manufacturer cars when they were surveyed and that this manufacturing company is just one candidates of their numerous plans. If so , the author could not conclude that their demand would increase dramatically and a new plant is necessary needed to satisfy that demand.

Secondly, in order to argue the possibility of the new plant under the company's productivity the author cites a successful example that a airplane manufacturer once used to prove that the part-time rotating strategy would also be successful. Since the author overlooks some other specific reasons for the success of that airplane manufacturer and provide no other detailed evidence to convince me, the part-time rotating assumption might not be as successful as the airplane manufacturer. It is likely that the airplane manufacturer was the little success among a myriad of failures who committed such part-time rotating strategy, if so , this part-time strategy might be adventurous and even fail. Or although the part-time rotating strategy might be successful in other manufacturer, many specific factors of different companies and factories remain to risk that strategy. Without other further and detailed evidence the author could not adopt such strategy so easily, it is entirely possible that most workers in the automobile factory do not prefer to do part-time rotating strategy, and if they were forced to do a strike would even happen. If so, such part-time rotating strategy would surly fail in the automobile company.

In sum, the author fails to convince me that a new plant is necessary due to the increasing demand for their products and that their productivity would satisfy that demand with a part-time rotating strategy. To strengthen that argument the author need to provide more cogent and convincing evidence that more consumers are sure to buy their products and its urgent for their company to build a new factory. To further convince me, the author also need to provide a survey to substantiate that most of their workers prefer to do part-time work and the part-time rotating strategy is practical.


欢迎提供各种意见，在此先谢过各位了

zhangjunzjUID: 2658970

自己顶

sdfjackUID: 2809756

TOPIC: ISSUE156 - "Choice is an illusion. In reality, our lives are controlled by the society in which we live."
WORDS: 582
TIME: 00:41:50
DATE: 2010/7/16 20:18:22

Is it true as the speaker asserts that choice is merely an illusion and we do not have any choices(choice) in our real societal(social) live(lives)? In my opinion, although people mostly do not contend with their choices, there are always some choices for them to choose. (这句话没看懂)

To begin with, I want to make it clear that what is the meaning of choice.（语法有问题 that从句后面陈述句式）In our daily life and society experiences（表述似乎欠妥）, choice might be a kind of chance to take some actions or not, or it might be some opportunities cost at the expense of other opportunities. In this respect, choice is not an illusion and we can choose what we think better under the circumstance that all these choices are not so good as we expected. Although in all bad choices that we have to face, we still have a chance to choose a better one among these bad choices（这个among什么的罗嗦了） and that would lead（lead后面的to 在哪？） us an illusion that we have no chance to choose (choose to do)except these all bad choices. From human emotion, that is understandable, after all, as (a) rational person, we all want some good choices which would satisfy us rather than some bad situations that we have to face and suffer(这句有些chinglish). However , when it comes to bad situations, choices seem not so satisfying for neither of these bad choice would change situations better or be beneficial to us, so we it would lead（老问题） an illusion that we have no any choice and might complain about that. In other words, no good choice does not equal to no any choice（好吧……我明白你的意思……但是换个表述吧）,（两句话中间没有连词怎么能用逗号） even the among the bad choices we can find a better one. Although in some certain cases, no matter what bad choice we choose would lead us to loose we still have a chance to choose one that loose us least, in this way, we could do our best by choosing one proper strategy to reduce our lose to the least.

In the real societal（恩 你懂的） life, as the limitations of some factors that we can not change, such as our physical abilities, our parental social status and the length of our lives, there are also many choices for us to choose and most of us could control our lives under some specific conditions.（这句话so长that我都看蒙了） A famous writer's example comes to my mind immediately, （that不能这么用）that is Helen Keller. As most people know, American female writer Helen Keller was born blind, at the time,（又没有连词了） her life seemed hopeless and many people did not expect that she would have such a great success in the world's literature. Choices were rare and even no choices for her in some people's eyes because in that period blind people were regarded able to do almost nothing contribution to the society. However, even under such a bad condition of physical disability Helen still made her choice to be a writer and with her efforts of trial-and- error that much more than normal people, she finally realized her dreams as a writer and achieved great success. From Helen's case, we can learn that no good choices do not equal to no any choices, even choices that do not regarded as good ones could be good ones for us under some conditions if we do our best to achieve and finish that choices.

In sum, I think that although in our daily lives, most choice（s） we have to face are not good ones we have expected( for), many other substitutes still remain for us to choose. If we do our best and achieve that so-called less good choices well(换个表达吧……) , in most cases we could control our own lives in reality.





这个……语法错误……用词错误……建议lz多巩固巩固语法和词汇吧~表述很多不地道的地方~推荐多看看句式
加油~

zhangjunzjUID: 2658970

谢了，我知道错了。我的所有文章是模拟考试的情况，限制时间随机抽取的，所有语法错误多了，有时候句法也有问题，而我发上来的一般都是我认为不太确定的文章，句式我看了很多，虽然自己下去写可以写很好，但当你真正模拟考试的情况，要写好真的还是不容易。

总之，还是谢了。时间不多了，我的要求也不高，所以主要还是以论据论点为主了，语法尽量避免吧