嘉木香草的TOEFL奋斗贴~~

嘉木香草UID: 2805584

1127 独立，加油加油！辛苦改卷人了，请狠狠拍砖！不胜感激，特别文章结构，逻辑，论证上的问题，现在正在探索中，还不是很懂，希望大家能多给指教，还有一些小问题需要注意的也希望帮我指出，包括怎么练习改进之类的，反正意见越多越开心^_^

嘉木香草UID: 2805584

1127integrated(这个单词老拼错。。)
辛苦修改者了！感觉这次的听力听的比较清楚些，文章就不难写了，关于文章的结尾怎么写希望能给点建议！谢谢

generalidUID: 2824377

31# 嘉木香草

嘉木香草UID: 2805584

33# generalid
红旗哥哥好好呀~~谢谢，一定要认真学习下，感动~~~~~(>_<)~~~~

嘉木香草UID: 2805584

33# generalid
刚才认真研学了红旗哥的修改，再次感谢，修改的好好呀！受益匪浅！！！一定把作文写到27+！！不辜负你的指导，呵呵~~~

bananasliceUID: 2628141

改好了 ~

巫婆和果冻鱼UID: 2944431

Should an effective leader make others have been part of decision making?
In my opinion, definitely, an excellent leader should absorb the other people`s suggestions as components during their decision making. The reasons as follow will support my statement.

First and foremost, we need others suggestions all the time in our daily life. When shopping, we want to choose a suitable coat from two similar ones, we need our friends suggestions; in employment, if we are the employers, then we need others opinions on hiring which candicates（小的拼写错误哦，呵呵candidates）; in university, we still need others` advices(advice不可数) about selecting which course. As you can see（不要说as you can see，中国人习惯第二人称，但是外国人不用，请用as we can see）, we need others help in our routine life in order to make better choice. Not to mention a leader making decisions which may be bound to many important things.

In addition, a superior leader should be the one with the characteristics of team work（团队精神不是一种性格）how to cooperative( cooperative 是形容词，以后用be cooperative或者cooperate)
with others, as well as the ability to learn form(spelling mistake) others. An effective leader can never be the one only fight by himself, on the contrary, in most cases, he/ she is the one who knows how to make good use of his/ her workers and how to integrate the decision from others` suggestions to be a best one. For instance, the famous character in history—liubei(刘备这个人不是一个例子，而是他的故事). He can be called an effective leader even though his own combat skills are not as good as his opponent--xiangyu，however, he finally beat xiangyu in the war between the their countries. The main reason is that liubei is the leader who knowes (again spelling mistake) how to make use of others` ideas successfully and cooperate together as a team. With this kind of thought and spirit, he finally became the kingdom of that dynasty。Kingdom是王国,刘备只能是成为帝王

What`s more, making others being part your decision making fits well with our society`s culture---being modest and harmonious. As the saying goes, "if you do not listen to others, you will fall in fault soon" and "three stupid men can be wiser than one smart man". Our ancesters （我建议楼主以后用word写，希望拼写错误这种低级错误不要干扰你的分数）have already learnt how to respect others` opinions and to learn from others. Those are important and essential qulities （同上处）
which will benefit us for life-long time.

All in all, even our common people should master the skill of learning from others, not to mention the leaders, especially an effective leader, should undoubtably（同上处）
making others` suggestions as part of their decision. only in this way, can he/she be a really "effective" leader.

我觉得没有写出怎么effective，effective意味着工作效率的提高，跟道德品质没有太大关系，希望下次能抓到点上。另外， 希望楼主把基础再打扎实一点，太低级的错误争取犯少一点，因为这种错误如果扣分了很可惜。如有不周，敬请指正

嘉木香草UID: 2805584

37# 巫婆和果冻鱼 嗯！谢谢你了，改的很详细，虚心接受，呵呵~~但是关于用Word那一点要说明一下，因为考试的时候是没有错误检查的功能的，所以尽量在练习的时候不用word以提醒自己少犯错误，虽然我也没少犯，呵呵……谢谢你了!

嘉木香草UID: 2805584

辛苦改卷人了！！！仍然是逻辑上、例证等的问题不太懂得，希望能给予指导，还有就是一些细节的用词拿捏不当，希望能给予指正！！辛苦辛苦！不胜感谢！！！

兔子加油UID: 2908816

done~~~

嘉木香草UID: 2805584

吐血。。。伤心，作文瓶颈了。。。

generalidUID: 2824377

这篇文章体裁比较难，难写是正常的，郁闷也是正常的。如果不能拓展开写的话，多想想一些具体的例子啦，麦当劳啊，肯德基啊等等，哪怕凑字数也是可以的

嘉木香草UID: 2805584

42# generalid
红旗哥哥就是这么好~~暖心，呼呼~~~~谢谢支持，我一定加油！！！

EEEE456258UID: 2454106

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising is the most important cause of unhealthy eating habits.

Advertisements are quite common in our life, which have a obvious influence on our daily rituals（routine）, such as what to use, what to wear and most important, what to eat. Nowadays（后面不能接逗号）when comes to the topic of ads, many people hold a negative attitude toward it, because they think that advertisements are just a way of selling more goods and making more interests, without considering the benefits of consumers. In my point of view, the harmful eating habits, especially, can be largely influenced by（blamed on） ads. The reasons are as following:

First of all, living in the modern society, we are exposed to extensive advertisements everywhere and everyday. When walking on the street, we are disturbed by the noise of (the sellers’ clamors )all kinds of selling notice; When resting in the park, we often received(receives) the brochure to advocate you buy something; when watching TV, we spend most of the time waiting for an excellent program to begin with waiting for（bearing） the boring ads to be ended. As you can see, ads are bounded to our every day life everytime and( 重复) almost every moment. With this extensive amount of information keeping telling you which food is delicious and healthy, we may easily get the impression that publicized food may deserve a try. Then the first step to an unhealthy eating habit might started.

As a matter of fact, being advertised(advertising) is not a bad thing. However, it is just sometimes the manufacturers only care about their own benefits and do not consider much about the health of the consumers. In order to make more money, many sellers put the convenience and easy-making as a point for sales promotion. Besides, the manufacturers may try to figure out(? make) the tasty food by adding some harmful substance for people`s bodies. The advertisements usually turn to look like(propaganda) this food is quite delicious and convenient, eating it you will get happy and healthy. Consequently, without knowing the components of the stuffs they are going to buy and (for pursuing) pursuring for a convenient way of eating, many people choose the ads-goods! The rusults turn to be that they enjoy a tremendous amount of unhealthy food in a undoubtful(debatable) unhealthy manner.

People are easily absorded to（absorbing） the description of the ads, especially those youngsters, who have yet not developed the ability to distinguish the real stuff inside to(of) the exaggerated appearance. My little brother likes ads for a certain chocolate pie (in the ads), because the ads are always showed with a concept of friendship, making him thinks about his friends every time he eats it. And every time his friends being invited to our home, he definitely eats the pie together with his little fellows.

不错 继续努力

嘉木香草UID: 2805584

12月3号，终于在规定时间内写完一次了，感觉这次题目比较好写，但愿考试时也能遇到好运气呀！不过还是要靠平时自己多积累了！！！加油加油！！！