Issue61 还有10天考，求砖定型

chrissie_luckyUID: 129536

issue61 High-profile awards such as the Nobel Prize are actually damaging to society because they suggest that only a few people deserve such recognition.

Are high-profile awards such as the Nobel Prize actually damaging to society? The speaker claims so, for the reason that they suggest that only a few people deserve such recognition. I concede that merely a small number of prodigies can be entitled to such honor. However, in my view high-profile awards are ultimately more beneficial than detrimental to society.

To begin with, all high-profile awards are based on the conception of equality, in which individuals from all walks of life have the same opportunity in pursuit of excellence. Although they can merely be accredited to a few prodigies in a fixed period of time, seldom do they deny the rights of the masses to seek for them. One need look no further than the Olympic Games for ample evidence to support that this is the case. Every individual who believes in the concept of fair competition has the same right to participate in order to demonstrate his or her ability to run faster and jump higher. In the Olympic Games, no race is looked down upon and no nationality is partially privileged. This same principle also applies to other high-profile awards. Every individual with certain required merit is entitled to the chance to pursue what he or she is longing for.

Detractors might argue that although everyone has the same opportunity to seek for high-profile awards, the probability of obtaining them is so low that most people will be frustrated. Admittedly, the initial purpose of establishing high-profile awards is to acknowledge the outstanding achievements of a few prodigies in their fields of inquiry. Yet, these detractors actually overlook one significant meaning that high-profile awards convey-that is, the recognition of the extraordinary progress of the whole human race. In other words, from a much boarder respective, these honors are granted not only to a small number of recipients, but also to the entire human race, to which these recipients belong. One apt illustration of this point is Mother Teresa who accepted the Nobel peace prize in the name of “the unwanted, unloved and uncared for”. In fact, this great honor was also awarded to millions of missionaries of charity who did their contributions to humanity. Consequently, hardly is there any justification for those who cannot obtain high-profile awards to be discouraged or frustrated.

Not only can high-profile awards demonstrate the capacities of individuals, but it also enables society as a whole to prosper. In fact, no field of study can advance significantly unless individuals bring their inspiration and insight to it in their pursuit of excellence. In this process, society becomes the ultimate beneficiary whether those individuals actually obtain high-profile awards or not. On one hand, history is replete with prodigies in every realm of life who made great contribution to their fields of inquiry on their way to high-profile awards. The Nobel chemistry prize recipient Madam Curie revolutionized human studies on radiation through her discovery of radium; the Nobel physics prize recipient Albert Einstein revolutionized modern thought on the nature of space and time through his special and general theories of relativity; the Nobel literature prize recipient former British prime minister Churchill brought the world vitality and imagination through his writing and oratory. On the other hand, those who did not receive high-profile awards but endeavor in their causes also make considerable dedication to society. For instance, nominees who do not receive the Oscar and artists who are not nominated both help to create some of the best moments in film history, and their contribution to the film industry are no less than that made by the winners. Therefore, high-profile awards indeed facilitate the development and progress of society in every realm of life.

To sum up, although high-profile awards indicate that only a few people deserve such recognition, they should be viewed as the acknowledgement of progress of the entire human race. From a boarder respective, they are ultimately more beneficial than detrimental to society.


我现在限时还是写不完，一改就写得过多了，不知该怎么办了，急呀！请高人指点！多谢！

四月的迷迭香UID: 154552

issue61 High-profile awards such as the Nobel Prize are actually damaging to society because they suggest that only a few people deserve such recognition.

Are high-profile awards such as the Nobel Prize actually damaging to society? The speaker claims so, for the reason that they suggest that only a few people deserve such recognition. I concede that merely a small number of prodigies can be entitled to such honor. However, in my view high-profile awards are ultimately more beneficial than detrimental to society.

开头没什么问题，个人觉得在than detrimental to这个地方有点小问题，因为前面并没有说为什么只有少数人得到荣誉就detrimental了。

To begin with, all high-profile awards are based on the conception of equality, in which（in which-> which means?） individuals from all walks of life have the same opportunity in pursuit of excellence. （分论点不错！）Although they can merely be accredited to a few prodigies in a fixed period of time, seldom do they deny the rights of the masses to seek for them. One need look no further than the Olympic Games for ample evidence to support that this is the case. Every individual who believes in the concept of fair competition has the same right to participate in order to demonstrate his or her ability to run faster and(and->or) jump higher. In the Olympic Games, no race is looked down upon and no nationality is partially privileged. This same principle also applies to other high-profile awards. Every individual with certain required merit is entitled to the chance to pursue what he or she is longing for.

Detractors might argue that although everyone has the same opportunity to seek for high-profile awards, the probability of obtaining them is so low that most people will be frustrated. Admittedly, the initial purpose of establishing high-profile awards is to acknowledge the outstanding achievements of a few prodigies in their fields of inquiry. Yet, these detractors actually overlook one significant meaning that high-profile awards convey-that is, the recognition of the extraordinary progress of the whole human race. In other words, from a much boarder respective, these honors are granted not only to a small number of recipients, but also to the entire human race, to which these recipients belong. One apt illustration of this point is Mother Teresa who accepted the Nobel peace prize in the name of “the unwanted, unloved and uncared for”. In fact, this great honor was also awarded to millions of missionaries of charity who did their contributions to humanity. Consequently, hardly is there any justification for those who cannot obtain high-profile awards to be discouraged or frustrated.

这段前面都不错，就是最后这句我觉得有点牵强。难道说个人的荣誉也是大家的荣誉，所以大多数人就不应该discouraged or frustrated了吗？毕竟是high profile呵呵。。。我感觉最后这句话就不要说discouraged or frustrated了，除非你能有力的说服考官人们应该大公无私到以全人类的利益为重（好像很难的样子呵呵。。。美国人不是崇尚individuality吗。）
Not only can high-profile awards demonstrate the capacities of individuals, but it also enables society as a whole to prosper. In fact, no field of study can advance significantly unless individuals bring their inspiration and insight to it in their pursuit of excellence. In this process, society becomes the ultimate beneficiary whether those individuals actually obtain high-profile awards or not. On one hand, history is replete with prodigies in every realm of life who made great contribution to their fields of inquiry on their way to high-profile awards. The Nobel chemistry prize recipient Madam Curie revolutionized human studies on radiation through her discovery of radium; the Nobel physics prize recipient Albert Einstein revolutionized modern thought on the nature of space and time through his special and general theories of relativity;（这个例子好像和获得诺贝尔奖没什么关系，因为老爱是因为光电效应得的诺奖吧，所以相对论能不能说是on the way to high-profile awards?有点怀疑。不过应该没事的，我是鸡蛋里挑骨头嘿嘿） the Nobel literature prize recipient former British prime minister Churchill brought the world vitality and imagination through his writing and oratory. On the other hand, those who did not receive high-profile awards but endeavor in their causes also make considerable dedication to society. For instance, nominees who do not receive the Oscar and artists who are not nominated both help to create some of the best moments in film history, and their contribution to the film industry are no less than that made by the winners.（。。。感觉on the other hand后面的意思有点跑题。。。题目并没有说没获奖的人不能为社会做出贡献，或者说根本就没涉及到没获奖的人会怎么样。而且这里说这个意思，和紧接着的下面的topic sentence有点搭不上。） Therefore, high-profile awards indeed facilitate the development and progress of society in every realm of life.

To sum up, although high-profile awards indicate that only a few people deserve such recognition, they should be viewed as the acknowledgement of progress of the entire human race. From a boarder respective, they are ultimately more beneficial than detrimental to society.

已经很不错了，语言基本没有问题而且可以说很不错！句子的形式、变换、措词都可以说可以了。结构上也没什么问题，三个分论点逻辑清晰。一些小的问题都在上面说了，这里不重复了。

说一点我对这个题目的看法。其实我觉得只要抓住一点就可以完全驳倒：only a few people deserve such recognition does not necessarily means damaging to society。分论点可以有三：１．肯定few people deserve　的必要性：这些奖励表现了对杰出人士的认同和重视　２．否定damaging：少数人获奖可以刺激更多的人去争取荣誉，为之奋斗，作出贡献。３．从society的角度来说，就是你的第三个body的意思。

gdhdannyUID: 125843

twins 改得好认真

语法问题我就不说了。

一点看法，开头结尾特别是结尾最好少用代词，直接把意思说清楚是最重要的。

写得好多啊，还是限时吧。

chrissie_luckyUID: 129536

多谢前辈们！

我会加油的！