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[a习作temp] argument202 动物灭绝.狠狠拍! [复制链接]

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发表于 2005-3-28 13:47:07 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
202Humans arrived in the Kaliko Islands about 7,000 years ago, and within 3,000 years most of the large mammal species that had lived in the forests of the Kaliko Islands had become extinct. Yet humans cannot have been a factor in the species' extinctions, because there is no evidence that the humans had any significant contact with the mammals. Further, archaeologists have discovered numerous sites where the bones of fish had been discarded, but they found no such areas containing the bones of large mammals, so the humans cannot have hunted the mammals. Therefore, some climate change or other environmental factor must have caused the species' extinctions.

In this argument the author claims that it is some climate change or other environmental factor but not human which have been a factor in the species' extinction in the Kaliko Islands. To substantiate this conclusion, the author points out that no evidence showing that human s had any significant contact with the mammals is provided. Besides, archaeologists have discovered numerous sites where the bones of fish had been discarded, but not similar sites of large mammals. Close scrutiny, however reveals several logic flaws, which render the argument unconvincing as it is stands.

To begin with, no evidence concerning human had any significant contact with the mammals does not necessarily indicate human had no any significant contract with mammals actually. Perhaps, some useful evidence has not been founded by human beings. Or perhaps, some strong evidence has been destroyed or overlooked carelessly by human. Either possibility, if true, will cast doubt on author's conclusion regarding people's role on the distinction of the mammals in the Kaliko Islands.

Secondly, even assuming author could substantiate human had no significant contact with the mammals, the author cannot conclude that people had not been a factor in the species' extinction in the Kaliko Islands. It is likely possible that people had exerted certain environmental pollution which drove the mammals away from their habits. It is also possible that people consumed some plants and animals which served as the main food of the mammals. Without ruling out these alternative possibilities, the author cannot convince that people have been not a factor which adversely influences the distinction of the mammals in the species' extinction in the Kaliko Islands.

Thirdly, the evidence about the discarded fish bones proves little to author's conclusion. First, the author is based on assumption that these fish bones were discarded by people, and it is likelihood that these fish bones was discarded by the mammals. Second, the scant evidence about discarded bones of mammals does not indicate that people had not consumed mammals. Perhaps, all the bones of mammals have been decayed during thousands years, or people have exported these bones of mammals to other places.

Finally, based on the assumption that people have been not the factor to the extinction of mammals, the author concludes that it is some climate change or other environmental factor which caused the species' extinction. However, this is not necessarily the case. Perhaps some other reasons of mammals themselves, such as some diseases, resulted in the ultimate extinction. Without ruling out other alternative explanation about the reason why the mammals in the Kaliko Islands had become extinct, the author’s conclusion about climate change and other environmental factors is undermined.

To sum up, the argument is unsupportive as it is stands. In order to better assess the argument, the author should provide clear evidence showing that people had not exert any harmful impact on the survival of the mammals in the species' extinction in the Kaliko Islands. Besides the author must substantiate other possibilities of mammals’ extinction, except climate change and other environmental problems, are excluded
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沙发
发表于 2005-3-28 13:50:18 |只看该作者
来看看~开头过长了~

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板凳
发表于 2005-3-28 13:59:09 |只看该作者
boyjim,词题的结论要两句话Yet humans cannot have been a factor in the species' extinctions
some climate change or other environmental factor must have caused the species' extinctions.
我实在压缩不下去了

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地板
发表于 2005-3-28 14:09:09 |只看该作者
我今天的开头就这样
explicitly as the author recommend, the statement remain groudless due to the following reason.
够短吧
我模仿 the author should lose his job...那个开头的....

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发表于 2005-3-28 14:11:54 |只看该作者
不要告诉我就这样你也写了上500个字.我想杀人!!!

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发表于 2005-3-28 14:13:30 |只看该作者
这样后面就可以分析得更加清楚~不用浪费笔墨在开头拉~
imong说过很多的了~~我觉得要勇敢放弃!

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发表于 2005-3-28 14:15:17 |只看该作者
啊狗有一篇300多字的都6分拉~字数不是关键~分析到位是关键

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发表于 2005-3-28 14:42:06 |只看该作者
In this argument the author claims that it is some climate change or other environmental factor but not human which have been a factor[it is some other factors but not human with ‘in’删去]in the species' extinction in the Kaliko Islands. To substantiate this conclusion, the author points out that no evidence showing that human s had any significant contact with the mammals is provided. Besides, archaeologists have discovered numerous sites where the bones of fish had been discarded, but not similar sites of large mammals.[感觉有点长,其实可以只指出埋藏地这一点,其他的在攻击中作阐述也不迟] Close scrutiny, however reveals several logic flaws, which render the argument unconvincing as it is stands.

To begin with, no evidence concerning human had any significant contact with the mammals does not necessarily indicate human had no any significant contract with mammals actually[indicate 后的句式变换一下,显得有些呆板]. Perhaps,[用maybe] some useful evidence has not been founded by human beings. Or perhaps, some strong evidence has been destroyed or overlooked carelessly by human. Either possibility, if true, will cast doubt on author's conclusion regarding people's role on the distinction of the mammals in the Kaliko Islands.
黑暗的时刻,我抓住它, 我知道顽强的人可以撕碎它的伪装,黎明的时候天总是分外的蓝。

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RE: argument202 动物灭绝.狠狠拍! [修改]

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argument202 动物灭绝.狠狠拍!
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-259632-1-1.html
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