issue104 泡面队8-12作业-from 硬柿子

硬柿子UID: 204138

Issue104  第10篇 是否正统教育形成文化~~~泡面队~~加油~~~
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：44分51秒     569 words
从2005年7月12日13时58分到2005年7月12日14时44分
------题目------
It is primarily through formal education that a culture tries to perpetuate the ideas it favors and discredit the ideas it fears.
------正文------
Human culture is unique because much of its content is transmitted from generation to generation by sophiscated communication systems. Formal education, religious beliefs, and daily social intercourse all transmitted culture. Nowadays, modern society offers us various ways to receive information that may shape our value, attitude such as mass media including radio, television, newspaper, public forums, magazines, and the most recently high-tech based internet. Thus, the speaker overstate the importance of formal education, through we form our culture.

I concede that when we were young, we form our value mainly through formal education. We were indoctrinated with the ideas and principals of the society by books and teachers. Then, we had not enough capability to question and criticize. We believe in what we were told about. Nevertheless, even then, we formed our value towards the world partially through family education. Two students accepting the same formal education but with different family education may form different values and attitudes towards the world. But in this level, it is subtle.

However, when we grow up to receive formal education in the college, it is not primarily formal education that we set up our values systems. Until when we have enough capability to distinguish false from true, good from evil, noble from humble, until when we have anal sizing abilities, we have critical thinking. We no longer passively accept what formal education gives us. It is through collective system that we form our value and the whole nation set up its culture. The great Victorian anthropologist Sir. Edward Tylor describe culture as " that complete whole which includes knowledge, belief, art, morals, law, custom, and any other capabilities and habits acquired by man a member of society." It is true that we receive intellectual faculties through formal education, but what about the others? When we hold a pair of critical eyes to look at this world, everything is what it should be in our mind. Two critical factors we should take into account are our systems of laws and mass media. Firstly, the legislator and jurist tell the people what is favored and what is discredited. When we disobey the law, we will get punished. It is through this system that we get the notion of what should be done and what should not be done. Secondly, in this area of full coverage of mass media, it is impossible to ignore the importance of it. We are instilled information here and there by television, newspaper, public forum, magazine, advertisement, and internet. Therefore, the person who allege that formal education weigh most in perpetuating the ideas it favors and discrediting the ideas it fears is blind to both systems of law and mass media on purpose.

Additionally, we may receive training from out of the college and enter certain racial, religious group, which weigh much in shaping our attitudes, goals, and values. We can also acquire the taste in fine art, humanities, and broad aspects of science as distinguished from formal education. Now the education is multilateral, the concept of the education itself is various. If we take formal education as the primarily channel to form our culture, why do people receiving the same formal education set up different value?

In sum, the claim that it primarily through formal education that a culture forms is unobjective, because there are other channels that are not less important than formal education in shaping our culture.

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-8-12 at 22:42 ]

skylovUID: 209137

恩～～～亲
西西～～
占个坐先～～晚上来看的说

real_vcUID: 195631

Issue104  第10篇 是否正统教育形成文化~~~泡面队~~加油~~~
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：44分51秒     569 words
从2005年7月12日13时58分到2005年7月12日14时44分
------题目------
It is primarily through formal education that a culture tries to perpetuate the ideas it favors and discredit the ideas it fears.
------正文------
Human culture is unique because much of its content is transmitted from generation to generation by sophiscated communication systems. Formal education, religious beliefs, and daily social intercourse all transmitted culture. Nowadays, modern society offers us various ways to receive information that may shape our value, attitude such as mass media including radio, television, newspaper, public forums, magazines, and the most recently high-tech based internet. Thus, the speaker overstate the importance of formal education, through we form our culture.

I concede that when we were young, we form our value mainly through formal education. We were indoctrinated with the ideas and principals of the society by books and teachers. Then, we had not enough capability to question and criticize. We believe in what we were told about. Nevertheless, even then, we formed our value towards the world partially through family education. Two students accepting the same formal education but with different family education may form different values and attitudes towards the world. But in this level, it is subtle.

However, when we grow up to receive formal education in the college, it is not primarily formal education that we set up our values systems. Until when we have enough capability to distinguish false from true, good from evil, noble from humble, until when we have anal sizing abilities, we have critical thinking. We no longer passively accept what formal education gives us. It is through collective system that we form our value and the whole nation set up its culture. The great Victorian anthropologist Sir. Edward Tylor describe culture as " that complete whole which includes knowledge, belief, art, morals, law, custom, and any other capabilities and habits acquired by man a member of society." It is true that we receive intellectual faculties through formal education, but what about the others? When we hold a pair of critical eyes to look at this world, everything is what it should be in our mind. 在这里分一下Two critical factors we should take into account are our systems of laws and mass media. Firstly, the legislator and jurist tell the people what is favored and what is discredited. When we disobey the law, we will get punished. It is through this system that we get the notion of what should be done and what should not be done. Secondly, in this area of full coverage of mass media, it is impossible to ignore the importance of it. We are instilled information here and there by television, newspaper, public forum, magazine, advertisement, and internet. Therefore, the person who allege that formal education weigh most in perpetuating the ideas it favors and discrediting the ideas it fears is blind to both systems of law and mass media on purpose.我觉得这段可以分成2段写

Additionally, we may receive training from out of the college and enter certain racial, religious group, which weigh much in shaping our attitudes, goals, and values. We can also acquire the taste in fine art, humanities, and broad aspects of science as distinguished from formal education. Now the education is multilateral, the concept of the education itself is various. If we take formal education as the primarily channel to form our culture, why do people receiving the same formal education set up different value? 感觉这段与b1重复了，都在说接受相同的正规教育，却有不同的价值观念

In sum, the claim that it primarily through formal education that a culture forms is unobjective, because there are other channels that are not less important than formal education in shaping our culture.

我觉得你偷换了概念，题目说是使人为好的观念长存，而不要那些不好的，但是你一直在说一个我们通过教育或者other channels来形成我们的文化，似乎离题了

硬柿子UID: 204138

啊??我是参考同主题和北美范文的思路来写的，
或许你可以先看看https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... &extra=page%3D1

而后我们探讨下~~:handshake

gglnba1UID: 202786

我说,怎末又新开贴了?我把文章贴到那个贴里了

bishao422UID: 204362

Human culture is unique because much of its content is transmitted from generation to generation by sophiscated communication systems. Formal education, religious beliefs, and daily social intercourse all transmitted culture. Nowadays, modern society offers us various ways to receive information that may shape our value, attitude such as mass media including radio, television, newspaper, public forums, magazines, and the most recently high-tech based internet. Thus, the speaker overstate overstates the importance of formal education, through which we form our culture.

I concede that when we were young, we form our value mainly through formal education. We were indoctrinated with the ideas and principals of the society by books and teachers. Then, we had not enough capability to question and criticize. We believe in what we were told about. Nevertheless, even then, we formed our value towards the world partially through family education. Two students accepting the same formal education but with different family education may form different values and attitudes towards the world. But in this level, it is subtle.

However, when we grow up to receive formal education in the college, it is not primarily from formal education that we set up our values systems. Until when we have enough capability to distinguish false from true, good from evil, noble from humble, until when we have anal sizing analyzing abilities, we have critical thinking. We no longer passively accept what formal education gives us. It is through collective system that we form our value and the whole nation set up its culture. The great Victorian anthropologist Sir. Edward Tylor describe culture as " that complete whole which includes knowledge, belief, art, morals, law, custom, and any other capabilities and habits acquired by man a member of society." It is true that we receive intellectual faculties through formal education, but what about the others? When we hold a pair of critical eyes to look at this world, everything is what it should be in our mind. Two critical factors we should take into account are our systems of laws and mass media. Firstly, the legislator and jurist tell the people what is favored and what is discredited. When we disobey the law, we will get punished. It is through this system that we get the notion of what should be done and what should not be done. Secondly, in this area of full coverage of mass media, it is impossible to ignore the importance of it. We are instilled information here and there by television, newspaper, public forum, magazine, advertisement, and internet. Therefore, the person who allege alleges that formal education weigh weighs most in perpetuating the ideas it favors and discrediting the ideas it fears is blind to both systems of law and mass media on purpose. 楼主的文章真的很不错的说,分析的很透彻,基本上没什么好改的 呵呵

Additionally, we may receive training from out of the college and enter certain racial, religious group, which weigh much in shaping our attitudes, goals, and values. We can also acquire the taste in fine art, humanities, and broad aspects of science as distinguished from formal education.这些东西在college也可以学到,所以没有什么说服力 Now the education is multilateral, the concept of the education itself is various. If we take formal education as the primarily channel to form our culture, why do people receiving the same formal education set up different value?可以论述的更透彻点 出现的比较唐突 把它与第一 二论点之间的联系稍微加强点 ps:直接第二论点可能好一点

In sum, the claim that it primarily through formal education that a culture forms is unobjective, because there are other channels that are not less important than formal education in shaping our culture.
我也写过这篇文章 可以帮忙看看阿~
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... 1&highlight=%2B

bishao422UID: 204362

哈 今天的作业

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=317402

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=317142

littlemouseUID: 191059

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=317475
泡面队8.12作业Arg24

24 The following appeared in a memo from the president of Viva-Tech, a manufacturer of high-tech medical equipment.

"In order to reduce costs, we should close some of our existing small assembly plants and build a large central plant. Grandview would be an ideal location for this new plant. First, of the locations that we have considered, Grandview has the largest adult population, so that we will be able to staff our plant quickly and easily. Second, since the average wage earned by workers in Grandview is less than that in the other locations, we should be able to keep production costs low. Last, as an inducement for us to build there, Grandview's town council has offered to allow us to operate for the first three years without paying city taxes."

8.12;14:07--14:37 ；440

If we analyze the argument carefully we will inevitably find there are several crucial flaws with the conclusion of buliding a large central plant in Grandview.

First of all, the arguor unfairly assume building a large central plant will reduce costs for the manufacturer. At the beginning, there is no information provided indicationg there is a need for Viva_Tech(VT) to build a large central plant. It is likely the existing small assembly plants can meet the need of VT. What's more, there is also no comaparison between the cost of the existing small plants and the new plant.  As we know, building a plant, especially a large one, will need a lot of money for the new buildings, new employees, and the place. It is highly possible that the cost of building the new plant is much more than the cost of the existing ones. The arguor cannot reach the conclusion of the building of a new plant will saving money for VT without providing clear statistics.

Furthermore, even if we admit that there is really a need for building a large central plant and the new plant wil save money for VT，the suggestion of choose Grandview as location is still problematic. Firstly, the largest adult population does not automatically lead to the result of being able to staff the new plant quickly and easily. Whether the people in Grandview are fit for the job in the new plant? What about the knowledge level of the population? Are the people there willing to work in the plant? The arguer does not give us any evidence to guarantee a positive answer to  the above questions. Moreover, the average wage of the workers in Grandview is less than that in the other locations also does not guarantee a low cost of the production. There are many other factors determining the costs of the production, such as the supply of the material, the costs of the equipments, the money spent on ads and so on. Additionally, although the new pland do not need to pay city taxes for the first three years, what about the following years? It is probably that the taxes will be much larger than other cities. Finally, the arguer also ingnores other factors influencing the further of the new plant, such as the tranfic, the weather, the terran of the Grandview. We can suspet that the condition of the roads connecting Grandview and other cities is too poor to satisfy the transport of materials and productions.   

Judging from all the factors discussed above, we can see that this argument is lacking of sufficient and powerful evidence to support its conclusion.

拜托帮忙看一下。
我把大家文章下载下来，晚上回去改，明晚发过来。
我只有晚上能上网的。

[ Last edited by littlemouse on 2005-8-12 at 19:54 ]

白袜MMUID: 2110872

为啥大家开了几个贴啊？

能不能把Issue和Argument分开啊，每天只留两个链接啊

我都找晕了

littlemouseUID: 191059

就是， 这样太容易被淹没了。

白袜MMUID: 2110872

先谈谈我写这篇的感受
这个题目我写了一半的时候，就感觉自己有些走题，在那里不停地说Formal education的好坏，没有注意到对Culture的定义也非常重要。看了北美的范文，发现这题主要是说文化的影响力（吸纳或排斥）是否正确，是否通过正规教育，有没有其他的方法。

另：如果有同主题写作的内容，能不能给个链接？有的时候自己看会漏掉一些
    我今天会贴出我自己写的并修改过的issue104，大家也帮忙看看。
    我回复的时候选不了颜色，只能加粗了。

It is primarily through formal education that a culture tries to perpetuate the ideas it favors and discredit

Human culture is unique because much of its content is transmitted from generation to generation by sophiscated （sophisticated） communication systems. Formal education, religious beliefs, and daily social intercourse all transmitted culture（用被动语态似乎更好，主语很长）. Nowadays, modern society offers us various ways to receive information that may shape our value, attitude such as mass media including radio, television, newspaper, public forums, magazines, and the most recently high-tech based internet. Thus, the speaker overstate(s) the importance of formal education, through (which)we form our culture.

这一段是从两个方面说文化的建立，还不错

I concede that when we were young, we form our value mainly through formal education. We were indoctrinated with the ideas and principals of the society by books and teachers. Then, we had not enough capability to question and criticize. We believe in what we were told about. Nevertheless, even then, we formed our value towards the world partially through family education. Two students accepting the same formal education but with different family education may form different values and attitudes towards the world. But in this level, it is subtle.

下一段说colledge education之前，在这一段似乎可以指出处在教育的哪一阶段

However, when we grow up to receive formal education in the college, it is not primarily formal education that we set up our value（去掉s） systems. Until when we have enough capability to distinguish false from true, good from evil, noble from humble, until when we have anal sizing abilities, we have critical thinking. We no longer passively accept what formal education gives us. It is through collective system that we form our value and the whole nation set（s） up its culture. The great Victorian anthropologist Sir. Edward Tylor describe culture as " that complete whole which includes knowledge, belief, art, morals, law, custom, and any other capabilities and habits acquired by man a member of society."

我从这里给你分段，不知道对不对？：）感觉你前后说的不是同一个东西

It is true that we receive intellectual faculties through formal education, but what about the others? When we hold a pair of critical eyes to look at this world, everything is what it should be in our mind. Two critical factors we should take into account are our systems of laws and mass media. Firstly, the legislator and jurist tell the people what is favored and what is discredited. When we disobey the law, we will get punished. It is through this system that we get the notion of what should be done and what should not be done. Secondly, in this area of full coverage of mass media, it is impossible to ignore the importance of it. We are instilled information here and there by television, newspaper, public forum, magazine, advertisement, and internet. Therefore, the person who allege(s) that formal education weigh most in perpetuating the ideas it favors and discrediting the ideas it fears is blind to both systems of law and mass media on purpose.

这段写的最好

Additionally, we may receive training from out of the college and enter certain racial, religious group, which weigh much in shaping our attitudes, goals, and values. We can also acquire the taste in fine art(s), humanities, and broad aspects of science as（去掉） distinguished from formal education. Now the education is multilateral, the concept of the education itself is various. If we take formal education as the primarily（用形容词） channel to form our culture, why do people receiving the same formal education set up different value?

这一段和正文第一段的论述还是不一样的，似乎更深入一些，但也有些重复。看笔者怎么调整

In sum, the claim that it primarily through formal education that a culture forms is unobjective, because there are other channels that are not less important than formal education in shaping our culture.

语言比较流利，虽然有少数错误。我比较佩服你能写那么多，还很轻松的样子，是不是要背一些经典的话才能开始限时写作啊？