Argument135 决战830排转组16日作业

zhizhiUID: 2123761

Argument135 限时 大家猛拍
:)
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：30分3秒     497 words
从2005年7月16日11时9分到2005年7月16日11时30分
------题目------
The following is a memorandum from the business manager of WLSS television station.
'Over the past year, our late-night news program has devoted increasingly more time to covering national news and less time to covering weather and local news. During the same time period, most of the complaints we received from viewers were concerned with the station's coverage of weather and local news. In addition, several local businesses that used to run advertisements during our late-night news program have just cancelled their advertising contracts with us. Therefore, in order to attract more viewers to our news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues, we should expand the coverage of weather and local news on all our news programs.'

------正文------
    In this memo, the business manager of WLSS television station recommends that the station should expand the coverage of weather and local news on all their news programs in order to attract more viewers to their news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues. Reasonable as it seems, however, it suffers from several fallacies, which together undermine the manager's argument.

    In the first place, the fact that most of the complaints of the views were concerned with the station's coverage of weather and local news can lend less support to the assumption that the national news is not popular. The author fails to provide any information concerning the details of the complaints. It is quite possible that the views complained that the weather and local news are covered too much. Lacking the attitudes of the views or contents of the complaints, the author cannot draw a further conclusion.

    In the second place, the business manger fails establish the causal relationship between the increase in time of national news in their late-night news program and the fact that several local business have cancelled their advertising contracts with the station.  The author unfairly assumes that the advertisements are broadcasted at the similar time with the late-night news. If not, what the late-night news covers may be not responsible for the conditions of the advertisements. It is quite possible that those local businesses have suffered a decrease in their profits, thus do not have enough money to maintain the advertisement contracts. It is also possible that other fees for advertisement in other television stations are much cheaper therefore attract those local businesses. Without ruling out these possibilities, it may be presumptuous for the author to ascribe the fact that many businesses cancelled the contracts to the contents of the late-night news.

   In the last but not least place, the recommendation proposed by the author may be neither necessary nor sufficient to attract more viewers or avoid losing further advertising revenues. On the one hand, the author fails to provide any evidence to uphold the assumption that the station will lose further advertising revenues. On the other hand, the author commits a hasty generalization that they should expand the coverage of weather and local news on "all" their news programs. Even if the late-night news should be responsible for the complaints of the viewers and the dissatisfaction of the local businesses, it may not be necessary to change the coverage on all the news programs. What is more, the author fails to take into consideration the possible side effect that may be caused by the recommendation. It is quite possible that the viewers of other programs may be not satisfied with their change; and therefore the advice may be backfired.

    In sum, the author fails to convince us that it is necessary or sufficient to expand the coverage of weather and local news on all the news programs. Without further consideration, the advice may be backfired.（结尾时间不够了 写的……;P下回要注意看时间了 呵呵）

momo56288860UID: 191433

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=320071

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... p;page=1#pid1745097

momo56288860UID: 191433

Argument135 限时 大家猛拍

------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：30分3秒     497 words
从2005年7月16日11时9分到2005年7月16日11时30分
------题目------
The following is a memorandum from the business manager of WLSS television station.
'Over the past year, our late-night news program has devoted increasingly more time to covering national news and less time to covering weather and local news. During the same time period, most of the complaints we received from viewers were concerned with the station's coverage of weather and local news. In addition, several local businesses that used to run advertisements during our late-night news program have just cancelled their advertising contracts with us. Therefore, in order to attract more viewers to our news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues, we should expand the coverage of weather and local news on all our news programs.'

------正文------
    In this memo, the business manager of WLSS television station recommends that the station should expand the coverage of weather and local news on all their news programs in order to attract more viewers to their news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues. Reasonable as it seems, however, it suffers from several fallacies, which together undermine the manager's argument.

    In the first place, the fact that most of the complaints of the views were concerned with the station's coverage of weather and local news can lend less support to the assumption that the national news is not popular. The author fails to provide any information concerning the details of the complaints. It is quite possible that the views complained that the weather and local news are covered too much. Lacking the attitudes of the views or contents of the complaints, the author cannot draw a further conclusion.

    In the second place, the business manger fails establish the causal relationship between the increase in time of national news in their late-night news program and the fact that several local business have cancelled their advertising contracts with the station.  The author unfairly assumes that the advertisements are broadcasted at the similar time with the late-night news. If not, what the late-night news covers may be not responsible for the conditions of the advertisements. It is quite possible that those local businesses have suffered a decrease in their profits, thus do not have enough money to maintain the advertisement contracts. It is also possible that other fees for advertisement in other television stations are much cheaper therefore attract those local businesses. Without ruling out these possibilities, it may be presumptuous for the author to ascribe the fact that many businesses cancelled the contracts to the contents of the late-night news.

   In the last but not least place, the recommendation proposed by the author may be neither necessary nor sufficient to attract more viewers or avoid losing further advertising revenues//好象不用S哦//. On the one hand, the author fails to provide any evidence to uphold the assumption that the station will lose further advertising revenues. On the other hand, the author commits a hasty generalization that they should expand the coverage of weather and local news on "all" their news programs. Even if the late-night news should be responsible for the complaints of the viewers and the dissatisfaction of the local businesses, it may not be necessary to change the coverage on all the news programs. What is more, the author fails to take into consideration the possible side effect that may be caused by the recommendation. It is quite possible that the viewers of other programs may be not satisfied with their change; and therefore the advice may be backfired.

    In sum, the author fails to convince us that it is necessary or sufficient to expand the coverage of weather and local news on all the news programs. Without further consideration, the advice may be backfired.（结尾时间不够了 写的…… 下回要注意看时间了 呵呵）

楼主的攻击逻辑错误的语言太完美了，全文的思路很清晰，偶看不出来怎么还能更好，能不能介绍一下写阿狗的经验啊？谢谢再注意把握一下时间就PERFECT了

momo56288860UID: 191433

你这篇文章可以做范文了，呵呵

nanziUID: 2126362

In this memo, the business manager of WLSS television station recommends that the station should expand the coverage of weather and local news on all their news programs in order to attract more viewers to their news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues. Reasonable as it seems, however, it suffers from several fallacies, which together undermine the manager's argument.

    In the first place, the fact that most of the complaints of the views were concerned with the station's coverage of weather and local news can lend less support to the assumption that the national news is not popular. The author fails to provide any information concerning the details of the complaints. It is quite possible that the views complained that the weather and local news are covered too much.(此句语法有问题，可以这样改：It is highly possible that what the viewers complained is too much coverage of the weather and local news program.) Lacking the attitudes of the views(改为viewers) or contents of the complaints, the author cannot draw a further conclusion.

    In the second place, the business manger fails (少了to介词)establish the causal relationship between the increase in time of national news in their late-night news program and the fact that several local business have cancelled their advertising contracts with the station.  The author unfairly assumes that the advertisements are broadcasted at the similar time with the late-night news. If not, what the late-night news covers may be not responsible for the conditions of the advertisements. It is quite possible that those local businesses have suffered a decrease in their profits, thus do not have enough money to maintain the advertisement contracts. It is also possible that other fees for advertisement in other television stations are much cheaper therefore attract those local businesses. Without ruling out these possibilities, it may be presumptuous for the author to ascribe the fact that many businesses cancelled the contracts to the contents of the late-night news.（此段在结构和内容上组织得很好，赞一个!!）

   In the last but not least place, （直接用The last but not least, 会更简明一些）the recommendation proposed by the author may be neither necessary nor sufficient to attract more viewers or avoid losing further advertising revenues. On the one hand, the author fails to provide any evidence to uphold the assumption that the station will lose further advertising revenues. On the other hand, the author commits a hasty generalization that they should expand the coverage of weather and local news on "all" their news programs. Even if the late-night news should be responsible for the complaints of the viewers and the dissatisfaction of the local businesses, it may not be necessary to change the coverage on all the news programs. What is more, the author fails to take into consideration （缺少of介词）the possible side effect that may be caused by the recommendation. It is quite possible that the viewers of other programs may be not satisfied with their change; and therefore the advice may be backfired.

    In sum, the author fails to convince us that it is necessary or sufficient to expand the coverage of weather and local news on all the news programs. Without further consideration, the advice may be backfired.（结尾时间不够了 写的…… 下回要注意看时间了 呵呵）

你的文章从结构上和内容上来说都很不错！！除了个别语言上的问题，很连贯，正如你说的，如果结尾再多点时间稍作总结就更完美了。还有，开头一段将题目中列举的事实论据稍微最一下说明也许会更好。

bythewayUID: 2120441

In this memo, the business manager of WLSS television station recommends that the station should expand the coverage of weather and local news on all their news programs in order to attract more viewers to their news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues. Reasonable as it seems, however （这个however完全多余。）, it suffers from several fallacies, which together undermine the manager's argument.

    In the first place, the fact that most of the complaints of the views were concerned with the station's coverage of weather and local news can lend less support to the assumption that the national news is not popular. The author fails to provide any information concerning the details of the complaints. It is quite possible that the views complained that the weather and local news are covered too much. Lacking the attitudes of the views or contents of the complaints, the author cannot draw a further ( further用的不恰当，用convincing比较好) conclusion.

    In the second place, the business manger fails （漏了to） establish the causal relationship between the increase in time of national news in their late-night news program and the fact that several local business have cancelled their advertising contracts with the station.  The author unfairly assumes that the advertisements are broadcasted at the similar time with the late-night news. If not, what the late-night news covers may be not responsible for the conditions of the advertisements. It is quite possible that those local businesses have suffered a decrease in their profits, thus do not have enough money to maintain the advertisement contracts. It is also possible that other fees for advertisement in other television stations are much cheaper therefore attract those local businesses. Without ruling out these possibilities, it may be presumptuous for the author to ascribe the fact that many businesses cancelled the contracts to the contents of the late-night news. （这段很到位！）

   In the last but not least place, the recommendation proposed by the author may be neither necessary nor sufficient to attract more viewers or avoid losing further advertising revenues. On the（the多余了） one hand, the author fails to provide any evidence to uphold the assumption that the station will lose further advertising revenues.（这个没说清楚。。。。） On the other hand, the author commits a hasty generalization that they should expand the coverage of weather and local news on "all" their news programs. Even if the late-night news should be responsible for the complaints of the viewers and the dissatisfaction of the local businesses, it may not be necessary to change the coverage on all the news programs. （这个好！打死了！） What is more, the author fails to take into consideration the possible side effect that may be caused by the recommendation. It is quite possible that the viewers of other programs may be not satisfied with their change; and therefore the advice may be backfired.

    In sum, the author fails to convince us that it is necessary or sufficient to expand the coverage of weather and local news on all the news programs. Without further consideration, the advice may be backfired.（结尾挺好呀，刚劲有力的。）
（总的说挺好的一篇argument！ 有水平！ 注意一下细节就完美了。）

高手，帮我拍一下https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=320405 谢拉！

zhizhiUID: 2123761

多谢各位 我语言上面问题还是很多的:(  
大家一起努力拉:) 加油:)