Issue207【SWEETBOX小组】第七次作业 by 雅典娜的宠儿

wzhfutureUID: 2264867

"Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished senseof who they are."


The author asserts  that rituals and ceremonies help define a
culture,and without them ,society or groups of people will have a  diminished sense of who they are.In general, I agree with his  viewpoint.However , we shouldn't neglect  there're other things  besides rituals and ceremonies that help define a culture.

First,rituals and ceremonies are the basic trait of a culture.Rituals and ceremonies first serves as a way by which people show their  respect to their gods and rulers or commemorate a special day in  their culture.As human race become more and more civilized ,this role has diminished gradually. However,it dosen't mean it's time they  retire and be forgotten, they gradually take another role--to define a culture. For in these rituals and ceremonies the basic and unique  characters of a culture are embodied. It is by these difference that  
a culture avoids being absorbed by others in the world laying   emphasis on globalization today.It is only by these difference can a  culture prolong its life and never disappears from the stage of  history. It is by these difference that a culture is defined and  people have strong sense of who they are.

Without its own characteristic rituals and ceremonies ,a culture may  risk of being overlooked and disappears one day.As far as I know,many cultures have died away due to wars in the world's history. The  invaders, conquering a culture with their weapons also bring a new  style of culture including new rituals and ceremonies.  Inevitably ,they will impose them upon  old ones.In most cases,the  losers have no choice but abandon their own rituals and ceremonies  .Their offspring will gradually become unfamiliar with them and  finally forget them .Though they may read and hear sagas of their   forebears   by chance ,they still cannot experience  themselves. Because sagas are not concrete, and there are no real  rituals and ceremonies to help them understand their culture'  difference from others throughoutly .Having the same rituals and  ceremonies with conquers, they will gradually have a diminished sense
of who they are.

Admittedly, rituals and ceremonies are not the only means by which a  culture can be defined. Language, for example,should take the  responsibility as well. It is treasure handed down from forebears. Its  creation stood for the civilization of the culture .Spelling and pronunciation of letters or characters all have some meaning in the  culture.With it ,we can communicate with our forebears and  
coevals,thus,we can have a better understanding of our culture and an increasing sense of who we are.Festivals play a necessary part in  defining a culture too.Chinese have Spring Festival,Mid-autumn Day,on which families gather to have dinner together,while   Americans  celebrate Christmas, Halloween,and Thanksgiving Day .Backgrounds , ways  to be celebrated, food , consumes and other conventions in them can  best typify a culture .Because they contain the basic and unique features of a culture making the culture distinctive. In all,what are  
listed above substantiate the importance of other parts in the  definition of a culture.

In final analysis,rituals and ceremonies play an important part in a  culture.Because they are indispensible(indispensable) ingredients of it and are  unique .They and other respects together help define a culture and  make people have a strong sense of who they are.

happyhappypigUID: 2342810

The author asserts  that rituals and ceremonies help define a culture,and without them ,society or groups of people will have a  diminished sense of who they are.In general, I agree with his  viewpoint.However , we shouldn't 尽量不要用缩写吧 should not neglect  there're other things  besides rituals and ceremonies that help define a culture.貌似大家写这篇的时候都要和culture挂钩，但是究竟culture和sense who they are有什么关系呢，好像没有提到哦，不知道这个建议对不对？

First,rituals and ceremonies are the basic traits of a culture.Rituals and ceremonies first serves serve as a way by which people show their  respect to their gods and rulers or commemorate a special day in  their culture.As human race become more and more civilized ,this role has diminished gradually. However,it dosen't mean it's time they  retire and be forgotten, they gradually take another role--to define a culture. For in these rituals and ceremonies the basic and unique  characters of a culture are embodied. It is by these differences 什么difference好像前面不是说得很清楚哦？另外我觉得这里的逻辑好像不是很清楚，前面说rituals and ceremonies反映了人类的文化，然后又说但是现代社会这些渐渐退化了，人们有其他的方式define culture，估计你说的difference是以前和现在对于文化的define?但是看后面的论述好像又不是这个意思？ 不懂？后面就说这个difference怎样怎样~~~晕了 that a culture avoids being absorbed by others in the world laying   emphasis on globalization today.It is only by these difference can a  culture prolong its life and never disappears from the stage of  history. It is by these difference that a culture is defined and  people have strong sense of who they are.我觉得不如你中间不让步说得更清楚一点，而且如果地一点也算是支持观点的话，开头的however，不如改成at the same time

Without its own characteristic rituals and ceremonies ,a culture may  risk of being overlooked and disappears one day.还是之前的问题， culture和sense who they are的关系？As far as I know,many cultures have died away due to wars in the world's history. The  invaders, conquering a culture with their weapons also bring a new  style of culture including new rituals and ceremonies.  Inevitably ,they will impose them upon  old ones.In most cases,the  losers have no choice but abandon their own rituals and ceremonies  .Their offspring will gradually become unfamiliar with them and  finally forget them .Though they may read and hear sagas of their   forebears   by chance ,they still cannot experience  themselves. Because sagas are not concrete, and there are no real  rituals and ceremonies to help them understand their culture'  difference from others throughoutly .Having the same rituals and  ceremonies with conquers, they will gradually have a diminished sense of who they are.ts我觉得改一下会不会好一点？ 我觉得其实不用说有没有adopt其他的rituals and ceremonies只要说他们失去了自己的,就不知道who they are了就ok了，至于有没有adopt别人的，我觉得对于这个point来说无所谓

Admittedly, rituals and ceremonies are not the only means by which a  culture can be defined. Language, for example,should take the  responsibility as well. It is treasure handed down from forebears. Its  creation stood for the civilization of the culture .Spelling and pronunciation of letters or characters all have some meaning in the  culture.With it ,we can communicate with our forebears and  
coevals,thus,we can have a better understanding of our culture and an increasing sense of who we are.Festivals play a necessary part in  defining a culture too.Chinese have Spring Festival,Mid-autumn Day,on which families gather to have dinner together,while   Americans  celebrate Christmas, Halloween,and Thanksgiving Day .Backgrounds , ways  to be celebrated, food , consumes and other conventions in them can  best typify a culture .Because they contain the basic and unique features of a culture making the culture distinctive. In all,what are  listed above substantiate the importance of other parts in the  definition of a culture.

In final analysis我觉得这段你没有analysis只是总结哦，呵呵，换个词吧,rituals and ceremonies play an important part in a  culture.Because they are indispensible(indispensable) ingredients of it and are  unique so?.They and other respects together help define a culture and  make people have a strong sense of who they are.

感觉第一段的逻辑有点乱，其他都还好
还有感觉你的introduction是反对的态度，后面写的是以同意为主，所以建议开头的写法再斟酌斟酌
呵呵，一点小意见，欢迎拍我的
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-694044-1-1.html

[ 本帖最后由 happyhappypig 于 2007-7-6 10:54 编辑 ]