作文球拍，别客气

weenbopperUID：2423595

A friend of yours has received some money and plans to use all of it either to go on vacation or to buy a car. Your friend has asked you for advice. Compare your friend’s two choices and explain which one you think your friends should choose. Use specific reasons and details to support your choice.

If asked whether to go on vacation or to buy a car is better, I would wholeheartedly support to go on vacation, and the main reasons are listed as follows.

First and foremost, vacation can convey us relaxation. As a member of this fast-paced and pressing society, almost every have to go through a rigorous schedule, even children can not exempt from this rush. There are papers to submit, deadlines to meet, meetings to attend, bills to pay, etc. Life is a never-ending struggle to most people. However, a relaxed and joyful travel can relieve pressure from your peers, family members and some other personal issues, just imagine the fresh air, green trees and plain, golden wheat, colorful flowers, singing birds and shining sun. Undoubtedly, a vacation is a golden chance for our burdened and breathless citizens to take fresh air from this rushing world.

Subsequently, you can learn from a vacation. Take traveling a abroad country as an example. By enriching your knowledge, broadening your eyesight, enlarging your horizon, opening your mind, you can know its interesting customs, view its long history, experience its colorful culture and appreciate its splendid civilization. To illustrate, the Imperial Palace in China, which is the living place of ancient Chinese emperor, can tell you how the Chinese emperor live, how the emperor negotiate issues with the governors and, how the splendid Chinese culture transmit from one generation to another.

Admittedly, a car also provides you with great convenience. Once possessing one, you can cut a lot of time in commuting process to listen music, watch movie, develop your hobbies and get together with your close friends or connected relatives. However, those people, who want to use this money to buy a car, are short-sighted. While enjoying this convenience, we, at least, should consider our offspring. Already suffered a lot from the extant cars, which projected us into a noisy, crowded and dusty world, we should pay more attention on the environmental protection and leave our sons a beautiful and clean world.
In a nutshell, going on vacation, because of its relaxed and educational function, is more preferable than an environmental-threatening car.

mpromanusUID：2565872

If asked whether to go on a vacation is better or to buy a car is better, I would wholeheartedly support (You can support a decision, an opinion or support someone, but you don't 'support' an activity. You may use 'suggest'.) to going on a vacation, and the main reasons are listed as follows.

First and foremost, vacations can convey us relaxation (Another fundamentally awkward phrase - most likely direct-translated from Chinese word by word. You can convey ideas or opinions, but you don't convey a quality or state of being something. I suggest 'help us relax'.). As a member of this fast-paced and pressing society, almost everyone has to go through a rigorous schedule, even children cannot be exempted from this rush. There are papers to submit, deadlines to meet, meetings to attend, bills to pay, etc. Life is a never-ending struggle to most people. (I think I've seen this whole part about how life's stressful - in exactly or almost the same wordings - somewhere else, before.) However, a relaxed and joyful travel (Misuse of synonym. Use 'trip'.) can relieve pressures you get (If you don't be specific, this sentence looks like it's saying a trip made by you will release the pressures felt by your peers, family members etc.) from your peers, family members (I see that you probably think family is a burden and you prefer to go on trips without your troublesome relatives. Caution on that though - most Americans are surprisingly reserved when it comes to family values.) and some other personal issues, just imagine the fresh air, green trees, and plain, golden wheat, colorful flowers, singing birds and the shining sun (A pretty picture, but take caution that you're talking to Americans, who likely see these everyday around their own houses - when they talk about 'vacations' it's likely about beaches, mountains, Disneylands or Las Vegas.). Undoubtedly, a vacation is a golden chance for our burdened and breathless citizens to take fresh air from this rushing world.

Subsequently (To use this word, you have to have something to 'subsequent' from..which you don't really have, because this is quite an independent point on its own. Just a simple 'Secondly' will do.), you can learn from a vacation. Take traveling a abroad country (There's no such usage as 'a abroad country' because 'abroad' is an adverb - seldomly used as an adjective. It's either 'go abroad' or 'a foreign country'. Again, misuse of synonym.) as an example. By enriching your knowledge, broadening your eyesight, enlarging your horizon, opening your mind, you can know its (What's?) interesting customs, view its long history, experience its colorful culture and appreciate its splendid civilization. To illustrate, the Imperial Palace in China, which is the living place of ancient Chinese emperors, can tell you how the Chinese emperors lived, how the emperors negotiated issues with the governors and, how the splendid Chinese culture transmitted from one generation to another. (Right, but do I need a vacation to see that? I can read about it in wikipedia, for example. I can watch a National Geographic documentary and can pretty much still 'enrich my knowledge, broaden my eyesight, enlarge my horizon, open my mind'. My point is: there're so many ways to achieve all these you've talked about, how does a 'vacation' add any special, extra values to one's experience? You've elaborated quite much on the 'learn' part, but where's the 'vacation' part of your point? Think about it.)

Admittedly, a car also provides you with great convenience. Once possessing one, you can cut a lot of time in commuting process to listen to music, watch movies, develop your hobbies and get together with your close friends or connected relatives. However, those people, who want to use this money to buy a car, are short-sighted. While enjoying this convenience, we, at least, should consider our offsprings. Already suffering a lot from the extant (This is a very archaic word. You'd be better off with something simple and clear like 'existing'.) cars, which projected us into a noisy, crowded and dusty world, we should pay more attention on the environmental protection and leave our sons a beautiful and clean world.

In a nutshell, going on a vacation, because of its relaxed and educational functions (You may want to pull this part after the next part, because the next part is your main point: it needs to come out clearly. This 'because' part is secondary information.), is more preferable than an environmental-threatening car.

总结：

1. 注意词汇的搭配法，避免用错高级词汇。如果你不知道一个词通常该和什么其他的词或者语境搭配，等于是你不会用这个词，所以建议要么连搭配一起背，要么就不要用容易用错的词，尤其考试当天不要用你没用过的词。

2. 题目是compare the two choices and explain. 这类题目要求明确地比较两个选项，而不是一个选项好啊好啊好到底的写法。

2. 论点的深度。。这个问题可大可小，看你怎么认为。除了文章里面已经提出的一些之外，最主要的问题在你倒数第二段的论点上 - 一个挑刺的考官完全可以说，买车不环保，难道坐飞机坐汽车去度假消费垃圾食物到处扔垃圾打扰自然景观就很环保吗？当然真正的考官估计不会有俺这么刻薄，不过俺希望能用这作为一个例子说明像环保这种大题材其实是不容易写的，如果没有足够深度的了解一个大问题的各个方面，其实不如写一些很个人化的简单的论点（就像你的头两个论点），反而不会让人揪辫子。