Issue130_彼岸小组第二次作业_by choupghead

choupgheadUID: 2969431

写的没有感觉啊，就这样吧，求狠拍。

    The speaker's assertion that the destiny of society is determined by the way in which children are socialized, while reasonable in some respects, is an over-statement at most. In addition, I consider that we have already obtained a relatively successful and mature way to raise children.

    It is no denying that how children are socialized plays a significant role in the development of our society. Socialization is the course of learning one's culture and finding the way to live within it, which provides the necessary resources for participating and interacting within the society for the individuals. I cannot imagine how the children will be without being socialized well. They may have obstacles in communicating with each other, having real friends and even subsistence, which probably distort their characters or minds to be a potential threat to our society. However, socialization is only one factor influencing whether individual will definitely contribute to a better society, and may even not to be the paramount one. Other factors such as moral, characters, skills, knowledge and so on also play an important role. Consider Roosevelt as an example, who was suffering from serious physical infirmities during his childhood, for which his social and physical developments were both stunted. Despite his aloofness and isolation in his early life, Roosevelt still impulse great power to American society by publishing New Deal during The Great Depression. He wasn't socialized well but also made a contribution to society by his strong will to knowledge and raw intellect.

    While focusing on the author's latter claim that we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help create a better society, a question will be threw out, that is, what is a "better society"? If a "better society" is defined as the environment in which people could communicate and respect with each other, different opinions and viewpoints will be accepted and tolerated, most of us could fill their heart and earn their lives with fulfillment, harmonious atmosphere and more cooperation could exist between different boundaries and races, then we could say that we have already created a better society. Everyone could feel the change and improvement of our society. Higher standard of living, less starvation, more opportunities to work are just part of the evident to prove this. Although we can't ignore the existence of the darkness of society, which will never disappear as human being are, for anything couldn't be perfect, we are leading a better and better society and master the relatively suitable way to raise children for sure.

    To sum up, whether children could make a contribution to our society is not only depending on socialization but also some other factors, such as school education, personal experience or moral standard. To strength children's education comprehensively is our duty, and in this way can our society become better and better.

melody-quUID: 2970250

The speaker's assertion that the destiny of society isdetermined by the way in which children are socialized, while reasonable insome respects, is an over-statement at most. In addition, I consider that wehave already obtained a relatively successful and mature way to raise children.

It is no denying(there is no denying) that how children are socialized plays a significantrole in the development of our society. Socialization is the course of learningone's culture and finding the way to live within it, which provides thenecessary resources for(to) participating and interacting within the society for the individuals. I cannot imaginehow the children will be without being socialized well. They may have obstaclesin communicating with each other, having real friends and evensubsistence(这个动词省略的有点多了，意思不是很明确), which probably distort their characters or minds to bea potential threat to our society（后半句意思歧义了，to be表示目的）. However,socialization is only one factor influencing whether individual will definitelycontribute to a better society, and may even not to be the paramount one. Otherfactors such as moral, characters, skills, knowledge and so on also play animportant role. Consider Roosevelt as an example, who was suffering fromserious physical infirmities during his childhood, for which his social andphysical developments were both stunted. Despite his aloofness and isolation inhis early life, Roosevelt still impulse great power to American society bypublishing New Deal during The Great Depression. He wasn't socialized well butalso made a contribution to society by his strong will to knowledge and rawintellect.

While focusing on the author's latter claim that we have not yet learned how toraise children who can help create a better society, a question will be threwout, that is, what is a "better society"? If a "bettersociety" is defined as the environment in which people could communicate and respect with（respect及物，with只能放在communicate后面） eachother, different opinions and viewpoints will be accepted and tolerated, mostof us could fill their heart and earn their lives with fulfillment, harmoniousatmosphere and more cooperation could exist between different boundaries andraces, then we could say that we have already created a better society.Everyone could feel the change and improvement of our society. Higher standardof living, less starvation, more opportunities to work are just part of the evident（evidence） to prove this. Although we can't ignore the existence ofthe darkness of society, which will never disappear as human being are, foranything couldn't be perfect, we are leading(加上to) a better and better society and master the relativelysuitable way to raise children for sure.
To sum up, whether children couldmake a contribution to our society is not only depending on socialization butalso some other factors, such as school education, personal experience or moralstandard. To strength children's education comprehensively is our duty, and inthis way can our society become better and better.


文章挺流畅，有一点小建议，感觉第二部分主要写了“更好的社会是指什么”，没有对“我们找到合适的方法教育孩子去建设美好社会"这方面展开描述,使两者有点脱离了。