求大神给我的作文提点意见！！跪谢

velanoUID：3615383

ISSUE第一题、：技术的发展使得人们独立思考能力下降？

我的作文如下395个字，个人感觉好烂啊，求大神狠狠地批~~~

The writer asserts that the gradually increasing reliance on technology has deteriorated the capability for human to think independently. While I concede that, to some extent, the writer has been on the true stand, the conclusion made by the writer still remains questionable.

The writer has recognized that currently there are truly some examples that illustrate the decline in the independent thinking of human beings. The invention of calculator is always the best case. Being replaced by machines that are much faster and more accurate than us, our ability in  math problems has always been deteriorating ,to such an extent that even the most simple equations could be solved wrongly by us .Besides, after the appearance of the applications that were designed to help us checking the grammar, people have used them to replace their own analysis of articles they write, which of course make us less capable of being so alert to the grammar mistakes we make in the writing. Sometimes we even find it so hard to decide whether a mistake has occurred that we have to turn to the applications.

Notwithstanding the cases that has proved the writer's assertion to be reasonable, there are still many examples that can illustrate the contrary side. For example, while many concede that the advent of computer has deteriorated the thinking process, we have to admit that it is the development of computer science that has promoted human beings to be much more clever and capable of dealing with more problems than before. With the storage technology of computer, we can put the data and profiles that we are not using aside without losing or forgetting them, which make it possible for us to do with an increasing number of matters. The programming, such as JAVA or C, has been a powerful tool that we can use to realize the accurate and fast automation on the machines, releasing us from not only numerous physical jobs and difficult thinking processes. The programming requires science knowledge as well as logical analysis, which actually promotes scientists to think for themselves.

Though the advancement of technology sometimes may bring us troubles like the decline of independent thinking ability, generally speaking the technology, except from improving human life, help make us smarter animals than before. We have to realize that some of the basic abilities may face challenges and make attempts to protect them from deteriorating. However, it cannot be the excuse that we can use to contribute all of the shortcomings to the technology.

velanoUID：3615383

错了，419个字