小心littleheart的独立作文，自1.27，更新至2.14

小心littleheartUID：2726034

15# tomatoo 呵呵 ~~关于孔子的那部分我是抄的~~~实在想不出来啊~~~

小心littleheartUID：2726034

不好意思，今天没有时间写要求的题目了~就贴了篇以前写的作文，请帮忙改作文的同学包含一下~~呵呵~~我会也认真看一下今天的题目，然后给你们改的~~
以下是考虑到“duck2010”的修改建议后的最新版~


有人觉得make sure别人（如有影响的人或你的老板）知道你的strength and accomplishment能帮你获得成功，否则一事无成
       People seldom agree with each other even in such trivial issues about whether showing off our ability to others, such our bosses, is conducive to success. It is no denying the fact that heated competition impels us to demonstrate our advantages continuously. It is indeed a wonderful way to be successful that let others know your ability. For only in this way, can we achieve our goal in a comparatively short time and with high efficiency.
       Initially, if a person wants to success in his territory, he extremely needs others' help rather than merely depend on himself. A worker needs to gain appreciation from his boss in order to reach a higher position. Just as in a company, in school, a Chinese student will try his best to let himself be well-liked by his teacher because his teacher decide whether he can be the class monitor. Sometimes, a distinguished professor's recommendation letter would ensure you attend the best university without too much effort; therefore it is of great significance to make sure your professor know your academic skills. When some others, such as your boss, your teacher and other people related to you, find your accomplishment and specific ability, they might do a lot for your future development.
From another perspective, let others know your ability and intelligence may contribute to your talking about meaningful topics. People always like to chat with the one who has a high-level understanding so that they can learn much thing from the person. Thus would help you forge new relationship with them, and when you confront a difficult problem, they are eager to help you. As a result the opportunity to success can be increased. On the other hand, it is your accomplishment that attracts others and they are willing to cooperate with you. In this way, you will have a good partner, which helps you succeed. Imagine that if no one knows your strength, that is to say your ability will be hided, and then whatever you do, nobody would assume an active role in helping you. It follows that you feel very tired and isolated, and even may give up. What’s more, the process of demonstrating your strength can also allow you recognize your shortcomings and drawbacks, and through others' guideless, you can become more perfect, meanwhile you are not far away from success. In my senior school, I was good at maths and usually discuss hard questions with my teacher. Since my teacher place a high value on me, he always took extra lessons for me after class and eventually I did very well in maths in college-entrance examination.
            We can see several benefits that showing off our accomplishments brings from the discussion above. However, that is not to say if we are a person not good at showing off or we are a shy individual, we would never be successful. Each enterpriser is a successful man or woman, while no one knows their accomplishment before see their glory and success. They achieve success through their intelligence and effort rather than through others' approval. Another typical example would be the famous painter-Van Gogh, his works were not appreciated by the public during his life, while he was called a great painter after death.
In conclusion, we all expect our accomplishment be approved by others, especially by our leaders, for the reason that it could contribute to our success in a relatively/comparatively short time. With others' appreciation, you may meet your goal easier than doing thing by yourself. We live in society, so everyone attempt to let their skills be acknowledged, which is crucial to the future development.

duck2010UID：2757376

People seldom agree with each other even in such trivial issues about whether showing off our ability to others, such our bosses, is conducive to success. It is no denying the fact that heated competition impels us to demonstrate our advantages continuously. It is indeed a wonderful way to be successful that let others know your ability. For only in this way, can we achieve our goal in the shortest time and with high efficiency. (第一句话的句式结构很好，但是我不了解这句话存在的意义。第二句话，句式也不错，但是严格说来，竞争刺激展现优势并不能说是the fact，而仅仅是你的opinion。混淆opinion与fact，可能会让一个美国改卷老师对你产生不好的印象。GRE和学术写作尤其必须杜绝这种错误。最后一句话，only, shortest，这样的措词可能让人抓住把柄。)


Initially, if a person wants to success in his territory, he extremely needs others' help rather than merely depend on himself. A worker needs to gain appreciation from his boss in order to reach a higher position. Just as in a company, in school, a student will try his best to let himself be well-liked by his teacher because his teacher decide whether he can be the class monitor（美国人选举班长可能并不是老师任命的，且美国人未必认为当上班长就是一种成功。这里可能存在文化差异。如果你一定要举这个例子，务必要加上in China）. Sometimes, a distinguished professor's recommendation letter would ensure you attend the best university without too much effort（这个也仅仅局限于中国人的投机，务必加上in China，或者，我建议你将without too much effort删掉 ）; therefore it is of great significance to make sure your professor know your academic skills. When some others, such as your boss, your teacher and other people related to you, find your accomplishment and specific ability, they might do a lot for your future development.



From another perspective, let others know your ability and intelligence may contribute to your talking about meaningful topics. People always like to chat with the one who has a high-level understanding so that they can learn much thing from you（这个句子人称混乱）. Thus would help you forge new relationship with them, and when you confront a difficult problem, they are eager to help you and as a result the opportunity to success can be increased（As a result前面最好断句，另起一句，否则整个长句子头重脚轻）. On the other hand, it is your accomplishment that attracts others and they are willing to cooperate with you. In this way, you will have a good partner, which helps you succeed. Image（imagine） that if no one knows your strength, that is to say your ability will be hided, and then whatever you do, nobody would assume an active role in helping you. It follows that you feel very tired and isolated, and even may give up. What’s more, the process of demonstrating your strength can also allow you recognize your shortcomings and drawbacks, and through others' guideless, you can become more perfect, meanwhile you are not far away from success. In my senior school, I was good at maths and usually discuss hard questions with my teacher. Since my teacher place a high value on me, he always took extra lessons for me after class and eventually I did very well in maths in college-entrance examination.



We can see numerous（numerous？数不清的。。。不够准确吧。你也就讲了几点而已） benefits that showing off our accomplishments brings from the discussion above. However, that is not to say if we are a person not good at showing off or we are a shy individual, we can（would） never be successful. Each enterpriser is a successful man or woman, while no one knows their accomplishment before see their glory and success. They achieve success through their intelligence and effort rather than through others' approval. Another typical example would be the famous painter-Van Gogh, his works were not appreciated by the public during his life, while he was called a great painter after death（一个句子只能有一套主谓宾）.



In conclusion, we all expect our accomplishment be approved by others, especially by our leaders, for the reason that it could contribute to our success in a relatively/comparatively short time. With others' appreciation, you may meet your goal easier than doing thing by yourself. We live in society, so everyone attempt to let their skills be acknowledged, which is crucial to the future development.

综合来看，你的文采很好，观点很丰富。
然而，必须指出的是，你的文章内容不如上篇充实。

从整篇文章来看，你经常用到第二人称you，摆了很多大小道理和观点。
这很容易给人以“说教”的印象。
而你只不过是一个中国年轻人，讲出来的道理自然不够纯熟，加上语言文化障碍，肯定不能打动一个美国阅卷老师。
这种文章行文风格可能会显得你不够谦虚，full of assertion and opinion，让老师对你产生不好的印象。

我给你的建议：
如果你想讲道理，摆出自己的观点，尽量将话说得“圆滑”一点，不要留下缺口。可以考虑，多用might这个词，不要把话说得那么绝对。美国人很喜欢客观、谦虚的人，而我们中国人说起话来都有《人民日报》的影子，喜欢忽悠。
如果你想举例子，尽量举符合美国文化的例子，或者国际知名度较高的人和事。有很多事情和道理，其实只在我们中国大陆发生和通用。因此，某些文化差异，你不得不考虑进去。

这是我的观点，希望能对你有参考价值。
加油！

小心littleheartUID：2726034

18# duck2010 非常感谢duck学长的点评，对我帮助很大~~~其实这句话People seldom agree with each other even in such trivial issues about whether showing off our ability to others, such our bosses, is conducive to success. 我是为了提出话题，增加文章背景，也是为了增加点字数~呵呵~我这篇文章内容的确有些空洞了，因为实在是想不出还能说啥了啊~好像来回就那么几句话~变着法子说~~~郁闷。。。。。想不出又多又好的观点啊~~~duck可否给些建议。至于举得例子，我又只能想到周围生活中的中式例子~~我应该怎么加强一下啊~~该多了解些美国生活么？？请指教~~~

小心littleheartUID：2726034

2.2 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The best way to travel is being in a group led by a tourist guide.
People seldom agree with each other even in such trivial issues that whether the best way to travel is being in a group led by tourist guides. From my point of view, while travelling without tourist guides make people feel more free and unrestricted, I hold the belief that we had better to find a guide when travelling according to the following reasons.  
Admittedly, the main purpose of travelling is enjoyment and to relieve people from heavy burden. We completely enjoy ourselves when seeing the beautiful scenery or getting a mysterious place with our family or friends. And if there is a guide follows us, we may feel uncomfortable for we must listen to the guide's advice and go some certain places. In addition, some people are unwilling to accept the fact that travelling with a stranger.
From another perspective, travelling with a guide indeed brings us more benefits as well as guideless. In the process of travelling, we can not only feel relax and happy, but also learn lots of knowledge, such as history and geography. A tourist guide will lead us to some meaningful places, including historical relics, which contribute to gain more experience and become more well-known. Meanwhile, these types of knowledge play a significant role in our life for the reason that learning from life is usually more practically useful than learning from books. Through a professional guide' explanation, we can realize the custom of a certain area and thus we can really have a deep understanding about local culture. Just imagine, owing to that we are unfamiliar with the travelling place, we may miss certain important historical relics without a guide. It follows that it would an imperfect travelling which leaves some regret.
What’s more, it is more convenient for us when travelling led by a tourist guide. We don't need to plan where to go tomorrow and what time to get up by own because our guide will make a careful plan for us. We don't have to worry about being lost when arriving at a strange place because a person will lead us all long. Having a guide is like a having a safeguard, and tourist guides are the best maps which give us correct direction. On the other hand, we can meet various kinds of person if choosing travelling in a group, and only in this way, can we improve the ability of communication.
By and large, it is true that travelers can go anywhere they desire and have more freedom without a tourist guide's interrupt. However, considering that people can acquire more knowledge as well as the security problems, I personally stand on the ground that travelling with a group of people led by tourist guide is the best way.

tomatooUID：2754865

People seldom agree with each other even in such trivial issues(such a trivial issue后面引导了一个从句说得是一个问题，所以要一致)(这种万能的句子真好，学到了) that whether the best way to travel is being in a group led by tourist guides. From my point of view, while travelling without tourist guides make people feel more free and unrestricted, I hold the belief that we had better to find a guide when travelling according to the following reasons.  

Admittedly, the main purpose of travelling is enjoyment and to relieve people from heavy burden. We completely enjoy ourselves when seeing the beautiful scenery or getting a mysterious place with our family or friends. And if there is a guide follows us, we may feel uncomfortable for we must listen to the guide's advice and go some certain places. In addition, some people are unwilling to accept the fact that travelling with a stranger.

s8 M5 a2 t1 W2 _: `" P
From another perspective, travelling with a guide indeed brings us more benefits as well as guideless. In the process of travelling, we can not only feel relax and happy, but also learn lots of knowledge, such as history and geography. A tourist guide will lead us to some meaningful places, including historical relics, which contribute to gain(contribute to sth, or, contribute to doing) more experience and become more well-known. Meanwhile, these types of knowledge play a significant role in our life for the reason that learning from life is usually more practically useful than learning (可以不要)from books. Through a professional guide's explanation, we can realize the custom of a certain area and thus we can really have a deep understanding about local culture. Just imagine, owing to that we are unfamiliar with the travelling place, we may miss certain(这个词用太多次了) important historical relics without a guide. It follows that it would be an imperfect travelling which leaves some regrets.

What's more, it is more convenient for us when travelling led by a tourist guide. We don't need to plan where to go tomorrow and what time to get up by own because our guide will make a careful plan for us. We don't have to worry about being lost when arriving at a strange place because a person will lead us all long（再来一句吧，构成排比，呵呵）. Having a guide is like a（删掉） having a safeguard, and tourist guides are the best maps which give us correct direction. On the other hand, we can meet various kinds of person if choosing travelling in a group, and only（这个only用得不好，只有这样才行吗？你爱上这个倒装了，呵呵） in this way, can we improve the ability of communication.

By and large, it is true that travelers can go anywhere they desire and have more freedom without a tourist guide's interrupt. However, considering that people can acquire more knowledge as well as (without worring about) the security problems, I personally stand on the ground that travelling with a group of people led by tourist guide is the best way.

经典五段法！
非常好,下次我也学着这么试试。
很好啊，简单没关系，表达清楚就好！
GOOD JOB！

lxg198607UID：2564115

People seldom agree with each other even in such trivial（感觉这次用在这不太好，trivial好像有贬义） issues that whether the best way to travel is being in a group led by tourist guides. From my point of view, while travelling without tourist guides make people feel more free and unrestricted, I hold the belief that we had better（有这用法么，would better） to find a guide when travelling according to the following reasons.  

Admittedly, the main purpose of travelling is enjoyment and to relieve people from heavy burden. We completely enjoy ourselves when seeing the beautiful scenery or getting （to）a mysterious place with our family or friends. And if there is a guide follows （following）us, we may feel uncomfortable for we must listen to the guide's advice and go (to)some certain places. In addition, some people are unwilling to accept the fact that travelling with a stranger.. R3 Q: d% Q/ ^
From another perspective, travelling with a guide indeed brings us more benefits as well as guideless. In the process of travelling, we can not only feel relax and happy, but also learn lots of knowledge, such as history and geography. A tourist guide will lead us to some meaningful places, including historical relics, which contribute to gain more experience and become more well-known. Meanwhile, these types of knowledge play a significant role in our life for the reason that learning from life is usually more practically useful than learning from books. Through a professional guide' explanation, we can realize the custom of a certain area and thus we can really have a deep understanding about local culture. Just imagine, owing to that we are unfamiliar with the travelling place, we may miss certain important historical relics without a guide. It follows that it would (be)an imperfect travelling which leaves some regret.+ C( h7 e  x; ?7 y6 ^. M
What’s more, it is more convenient for us when travelling led by a tourist guide. We don't need to plan where to go tomorrow and what time to get up by own because our guide will make a careful (用thorough怎样)plan for us. We don't have to worry about being lost when arriving at a strange place because a person will lead us all long. Having a guide is like a having a safeguard, and tourist guides are the best maps which give us correct direction. On the other hand, we can meet various kinds of person if choosing travelling in a group, and only in this way, can we improve the ability of communication.
By and large, it is true that travelers can go anywhere they desire （like）and have more freedom without a tourist guide's interrupt. However, considering that people can acquire more knowledge as well as the security problems, I personally stand on the ground that travelling with a group of people led by tourist guide is the best way.
  全文逻辑清晰，句式多样，例子举的不错，但有少量的语法错误，继续加油。。

小心littleheartUID：2726034

22# tomatoo :最近觉得自己词汇好贫乏啊~~来回写就那么几个词~~~该背单词啦~~~呵呵~~

小心littleheartUID：2726034

2.4 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Technology makes people’s lives simpler in turn to make people’s lives more complicated.

With the advent of various technologies, people's lives become more convenient and simple than before to some extent. However, we cannot deny the fact that what new technology brings is not only facilitates, but also a vast majority of problems, which make people's lives more complicated.

Technology improvement consists of a large scale of commodities, including information intensification, the arrival of internet, and so many highly-developed facilities. Take PC and internet for instance, nowadays, they are regarded as new game-machines for children as well as indispensible instruments for white-collars. Meanwhile, we can communicate with our friends, family in the shortest time through clicking the keyboards. However, the drawbacks seemingly outweigh the benefits. With the help of these high-speed information transporters, suspects find a better way to gain illegal money and spread violence through internet and other media. An increasing number of websites had been attacked by hacker, and the criminals are difficult to be captured. Therefore, it is hard to ensure our residents' healthy and property safety so that they will feel anxious and tired which never would happen before the arrival of these technology. Furthermore, recently, the ATM of several banks has aroused several problems that is some lawbreakers try to utilize advanced skills to steal the user's ID an code, then they can easily acquire the dollars in the bank card. This is not a rare case that makes a big loss for the user and a nightmare for policemen. Don’t these affairs identify that our society is becoming more and more complicated? Just imagine that if we had no these kinds of technology, our life would be much simpler and safer.

Owing to the invention of an increasing number of electrical products, we possess so many different chioces to enjoy and relax ourselves. After a long-day hard work, we have no desire to do assignments any more, even unwilling to chat with our family members, just sitting in front of TV. Some are addicted to the tedious soap opera because of the heavy burden from work or school, and they suggest that only by watching these types of programs, can they forget all the troubles and difficulties. On the other hand, thus would greatly decrease the chance of communication between family members, which plays a significant role in all relationships. Accordingly, I assert that this phenomenon will lead to a lot of social problems, such as the high rate of divorce. It follows that kids may have an imperfect family or a woman may become a single mother. Conflicted by numerous information and technical development, it is true that our life become rich and varied, whereas, sometimes we may feel isolated from the outside world because we don’t have too many time and energy to deal with confused issues in our complicated life.

Sweeping generalizations are impossible here. Based on those mentioned above, I would like to support both advantages and disadvantages that technology brings. And most advantages result in a cozy and easy life for us, similarly, and a amount of disadvantages indeed cause life more sophisticated. So I personally agree the statement that technology makes people’s lives simpler in turn to make people’s lives more complicated.

yuminjiaUID：2659628

25# 小心littleheart
2.4 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Technology makes people’s lives simpler in turn to make people’s lives more complicated.
- z# D) w% W2 l2 E0 j0 g& s) K9 J: }7 ]& \+ j3 _" n
With the advent of various technologies, people's lives become more convenient and simple than before to some extent. However, we cannot deny the fact that what new technology brings is not only facilitates, but also a vast majority of problems, which make people's lives more complicated.5 }; x- E% r* l6 G) a1 p

Technology improvement consists of a large scale of commodities, including information intensification, the arrival of internet, and so many highly-developed facilities. Take PC and internet for instance. Nowadays, they are regarded as new game-machines for children as well as indispensible instruments for white-collars. Meanwhile, we can communicate with our friends, family in the shortest time through clicking the keyboards. However, the drawbacks seemingly outweigh the benefits. With the help of these high-speed information transporters, suspects find a better way to gain illegal money and spread violence through internet and other media. An increasing number of websites had been attacked by hacker, and the criminals are difficult to be captured. Therefore, it is hard to ensure our residents' healthy and property safety so that they will feel anxious and tired which never would happen before the arrival of these technology. Furthermore, recently, the ATM of several banks has aroused several problems that is some lawbreakers try to utilize advanced skills to steal the user's ID an code by utilizing advanced skills, then they can easily acquire the dollars in the bank card. This It is not a rare case that makes a big loss for the user and a nightmare for policemen. Don’t these affairs identify that our society is becoming more and more complicated? Just imagine that if we had no these kinds of technology, our life would be much simpler and safer.



Owing to the invention of an increasing number of electrical products, we possess so many different choices to enjoy and relax ourselves. After a long-day hard work, we have no desire to do assignments any more, even unwilling to chat with our family members, just sitting in front of TV. Some are addicted to the tedious soap opera because of the heavy burden from work or school, and they suggest that only by watching these types of programs, can they forget all the troubles and difficulties. On the other hand, ??thus would greatly decrease the chance of communication between family members, which plays a significant role in all relationships. Accordingly, I assert that this phenomenon will lead to a lot of social problems, such as the high rate of divorce. It follows that kids may have an imperfect family or a woman may become a single mother. Conflicted by numerous information and technical development, it is true that our life become rich and varied, whereas, sometimes we may feel isolated from the outside world because we don’t have too many time and energy to deal with confused issues in our complicated life.

Sweeping generalizations are impossible here. Based on those mentioned above, I would like to support both advantages and disadvantages that technology brings. And most advantages result in a cozy and easy life for us, similarly, and a amount of disadvantages indeed cause life more sophisticated. So I personally agree the statement that technology makes people’s lives simpler in turn to make people’s lives more complicated.
1.最后一段的观点到底是同意还是不同意？最后一句话没读明白
2．中间的段落是不是分几个段写比较清楚？
3．语法词汇都值得我学习。

小心littleheartUID：2726034

2.6 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Teachers should not show their political or social views known in the classroom.

Recently, there is an ongoing discussion online, with sharply risen volume, as" is it right or wrong that teachers show their political or social views known in class". In my point of view, the basic responsibility of a teacher is to modulate his/her students' personality and make them acquire knowledge. So I totally assert that teachers should not demonstrate their own sense of value to students.
Initially, as a teacher, he/she is bound to give some directions and advice when students are confused. For instance, when a senior student got through the college entrance examination, he/she may hesitate about which major to choose and which university to apply for. Then his/her teacher whose has a wide knowledge of such education information and who realize the student's hobby and proficiency may contribute a lot, because students usually trust their teachers. While if a teacher has a negative impression on certain majors according to some social reasons, and he considers more about his own feelings than the student's interest when helping his students alter major. How serious the consequence will be? The result is that the student may regret to ask for his teacher' advice and now is thinking about changing main subject. What a pity!
From another perspective, each man has the right to pursue his own sense of value, whether in aspect of political or social. Student, unlike adults, seldom formulate their views about matters completely. And they need opportunities to possess a sense of value belonged to their own. They can finish the process through learning from books and experiences, communicating with others. Even though the whole process of growing is filled with failures and hardness, everyone have to go through it. Sometimes, students are too young to tell the difference between right and wrong, and at the moment they may follow their teachers' and parents' behavior. Unfortunately, the viewpoints of many teachers are so extreme and have no balance. Therefore, if teachers show their own political or social views to the class, it may adversely affect students' mind and behavior. Worse still, teachers' totally listeners may be misled in their life road.

By and large, based on those mentioned above, I assert that a perfect teacher never show their individual points about politics and sociality to the class. Only in this way, can students lead a healthy development.

mangohahaUID：2758178

2.6 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Teachers should not show their political or social views known in the classroom.1 Y6 L) o7 |3 K8 y8 M% d
# ^+ D7 D: a2 I9 C3 c" z& s" I4 t
Recently, there is an ongoing discussion online, with sharply risen volume, as" is it right or wrong that teachers show their political or social views known in class". In my point of view, the basic responsibility of a teacher is to modulate his/her students' personality and make them acquire knowledge. So I totally assert that teachers should not demonstrate their own sense of value to students.
Initially, as a teacher, he/she is bound to give some directions and advice when students are confused（本段观点老师在学生困惑的时候所给予的知道是有限的）. For instance, when a senior student got through the college entrance examination, he/she may hesitate about which major to choose and which university to apply for. Then his/her teacher whose has a wide knowledge of such education information and who realize the student's hobby and proficiency may contribute a lot, because students usually trust their teachers. While if a teacher has a negative impression on certain majors according to some social reasons, and he considers more about his own feelings than the student's interest when helping his students alter major. How serious the consequence will be? The result is that the student may regret to ask for his teacher' advice and now is thinking about changing main subject. What a pity!
本段的论证不够充分。。。首先大部分的内容还是在说老师可用其指导性的知识帮助学生，后面虽然说how serious the consequence will be？ 但后面的给出的答案让人还是看不出来seriousness。而且本段你论证的点是direct，建议需要一个过渡性的语言，将你本段的观点和题目再进一步结合。
From another perspective, each man has the right to pursue his own sense of value, whether in aspect of political or social. Student, unlike adults, seldom formulate their views about matters completely. And they need opportunities to possess a sense of value belonged to their own. They can finish the process through learning from books and experiences, communicating with others. Even though the whole process of growing is filled with failures and hardness, everyone have to go through it. Sometimes, students are too young to tell the difference between right and wrong, and at the moment they may follow their teachers' and parents' behavior. Unfortunately, the viewpoints of many teachers are so extreme and have no balance. Therefore, if teachers show their own political or social views to the class, it may adversely affect students' mind and behavior. Worse still, teachers' totally listeners may be misled in their life road（本段中论证的主题是每个人都应该有自己的观点，到了尾句你的therefore是本段和题目联系在一起，相当于主旨你是放到最后一句才指出的，既老师的思想会误导学生，前面论证的是Student, unlike adults, seldom formulate their views about matters completely. 给出的例子是They can finish the process through learning from books and experiences, communicating with others. 感觉起来例子和主题有些松散。。。）.& @$ W# O- d5 \" ~0 p, U* B, S
/ I# Z% D5 a9 f  P0 j) N
By and large, based on those mentioned above, I assert that a perfect teacher never show their individual points about politics and sociality to the class. Only in this way, can students lead a healthy development.

作者的词汇用的比较出彩，值得学习，羡慕^_^，语言方面，由于自己也有够烂的。。。不敢轻易班门弄斧。。。不过感觉很不错
问题是对文章的理解，和整体把握，主题部分，1段你论证的是学生困惑时老师不一定能给予有效的指导，甚至可能会误导；2 每个人都有自己的想法，老师的做法会误导学生的思想。
每个人都有自己对题目理解的角度和深度，如果论证的得当这些是没有好坏固定标准的，不过要注意基本的一点各段论点和题目紧密结合，各段内例子和各段观点也要紧密，还有，感觉初次看的感觉上1 2 段的内容有很多重合部分，这对你的论证很不利。。。

小心littleheartUID：2726034

2.8 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Being creative, rather than planning carefully, will come up with best solution to a problem.

People seldom agree with each other in such a controversial issue that which is the best solution to a problem, being creative or planning carefully. A vast majority of people may definitely assert that planning carefully step by step is a safe method to any difficulties. However, I prefer to think creatively when confronting a problem owing to the following reasons.
Admittedly, in some cases, a thorough plan is not a bad choose for us, especially for those carefully-minded persons. There is no denying the fact that a regularly schedule is a prerequisite for any kinds of work. A responsible teacher is bound to prepare for an elaborate teaching schedule before taking class. A boss is supposed to allocate every individual's assignment, as well as make an advanced plan for annually investment and profit, otherwise it may lead to a serious consequence and a great loss to the company. Furthermore, the most valuable merit of planning carefully is that we will not feel anxious when facing a problem because we have been planned for it in advance.
Considering those mentioned above, a careful plan indeed bring us a number of benefits, while when compared with being creative, is it still the best method? As we all know, in most cases, we cannot predict what will happen tomorrow and how the future will being, and the same is true for when the problem will come out. Since we do not know what the trouble we are preparing for is and when will it come into being, seldom do we have the time and opportunity to make a schedule for it. On the contrary, thinking creatively can be the most effective way of overcoming the difficulties. At the time, what we should do is not looking for our plan or schedule book, but to motive our brain and explore our intelligence, then a surprising solution may shape in our mind. Take designing for instance, if a designer have to draft pictures for a vital building and then he face several problems, such as what shape does a certain living room will be, round or polygon and what material of room wall should be, too many to choose. He will not plan for details step by step just like solving math’s problems, in contrast, he should make a decision through thinking creatively to demonstrate his characteristic and only by this mean, would the building be a masterpiece.

By and large, planning a schedule for everything is a good habit, whereas not all matters are suitable for planning and on the contrary we can think creatively without a doubt when solving any problems. Meanwhile, through being creative, we may accomplish an achievement in a fascinating way. Therefore, I personally support that being creative will come up with the best solution to a problem.

lxg198607UID：2564115

People seldom agree with each other in such a controversial issue that（破折号比较好又which ，that的）which is the best solution to a problem, being creative or planning carefully. A vast majority of people may definitely assert that planning carefully step by step is a safe method to any difficulties. However, I prefer to think creatively when confronting a problem owing to the following reasons.- W" V" b' H: n' l- f

Admittedly, in some cases, a thorough plan is not a bad choose for us, especially for those carefully-minded persons. There is no denying the fact that a regularly （regular）schedule is a prerequisite for any kinds of work. A responsible teacher is bound to prepare for an elaborate teaching schedule before taking class(这句看的好难受，建议直接改成prepare an elaborate schedule for class). A boss is supposed to allocate every individual's assignment, as well as make an advanced plan for annually（annual） investment and profit, otherwise it may lead to a serious consequence and a great loss to the company. Furthermore, the most valuable(biggest) merit of planning carefully is that we will not feel anxious when facing (faced with)a problem because we have been planned for it in advance.
Considering those mentioned above,(这里一定要人做主语吧，不然你怎们能用considering尼, we gain a lot of benefits from a careful plan) a careful plan indeed bring us a number of benefits, while when compared with being creative, is it still the best method? As we all know, in most cases, we cannot predict what will happen tomorrow and how the future will being, and the same is true for(it is similar) when the problem will come out. Since we do not know what the trouble we are preparing for is and when will it come into being, seldom do we have the time and opportunity to make a schedule for it. (我明白你的意思， 你是想要写很多东西很难预料，不可能做完美的计划出来，但是你这一小段表述的不够清楚)On the contrary, thinking creatively can be the most effective way of overcoming the difficulties. At the time, what we should do is not looking for our plan or schedule book, but to motive our brain and explore （用的不妥吧，用exert）our intelligence, then a surprising solution may shape in our mind. Take designing for instance, if a designer have to draft pictures for （of）a vital building and then he face several problems, such as what shape does a certain living room will be, round or polygon and what material of room wall should be, too many to choose. He will not plan for details step by step just like solving math’s problems, in contrast, he should make a decision through thinking creatively to demonstrate his characteristic and only by this mean, would the building be a masterpiece.(这个例子我没看出来怎么证明创新很重要，可能是你写的时候随意编的一个例子，感觉不是很严密。) 9 b; _( w- f# \) p8 d; {()
3 T8 @. V$ e9 M7 e- h& B
By and large, planning a schedule for everything is a good habit, whereas not all matters are suitable for planning and on the contrary we can think creatively without a doubt when solving any problems. Meanwhile, through being creative, we may accomplish an achievement in a fascinating way. Therefore, I personally support that being creative will come up with the best solution to a problem.
全文结构比较清楚，观点明确，但是对于创新的论证不够。。还有些句子语法有错误，anyway good job加油。。

ivybettyUID：2328308

People seldom agree with each other in such a controversial issue that which is the best solution to a problem, being creative or planning carefully. A vast majority of people may definitely assert that planning carefully step by step(感觉有点重复，不知楼主的意见？) is a safe method to （加solve？）any difficulties. However, I prefer to think creatively when confronting a problem owing to the following reasons（学习了）.观点明确，很好的开头

Admittedly, in some cases, a thorough plan is not a bad choose for us, especially for those carefully-minded persons. There is no denying the fact that a regularly schedule is a prerequisite for（学习了） any kinds of work. A responsible teacher is bound to prepare for an elaborate teaching schedule before taking class. A boss is supposed to allocate every individual's assignment, as well as make an advanced plan for annually investment and profit, otherwise it may lead to a serious consequence and a great loss to the company. Furthermore, the most valuable merit of planning carefully is that we will not feel anxious when facing a problem because we have been planned for it in advance.观点鲜明，举例丰富。

Considering those mentioned above, a careful plan indeed brings us a number of benefits, while when(建议去掉) compared with being creative, is it still the best method? As we all know, in most cases, we cannot predict what will happen tomorrow and how the future will being（be）, and the same is true for when the problem will come out. Since we do not know what the trouble we are preparing for is and when will it(it will) come into being, seldom do we have the time and opportunity to make a schedule for it. On the contrary, thinking creatively can be the most effective way of overcoming(to overcome) the difficulties. At the time, what we should do is not looking for our plan or schedule book, but to motive(activate/motivate?) our brains and explore our intelligence, then a surprising solution may shape in our mind. Take designing for instance, if a designer have to draft pictures for a vital building and then he face several problems, such as what shape does a certain living room will be, round or polygon and what material of room wall should be, too many to choose. He will not plan for details step by step just like solving math’s problems, in contrast, he should make a decision through thinking creatively to demonstrate his characteristic and only by this mean, would the building be a masterpiece(好词).

By and large, planning a schedule for everything is a good habit, whereas not all matters are suitable for planning and on the contrary we can think creatively without a doubt when solving any problems. Meanwhile, through being creative, we may accomplish an achievement in a fascinating way. Therefore, I personally support that being creative will come up with the best solution to a problem.观点鲜明
1.观点鲜明，逻辑顺畅，词汇丰富。
2.支持creative的例子如果更有说服力会个更好
3.总之是一篇好文章，学习了@