作文冲击第四波，Report,写到想哭

扇舞丹青UID: 2905322

Nowadays,some organizations and charities publicize their activities by introducing special days every year like National Children’s Day and Non- smoking Day. Why do they introduce special days and what effects does this have?


Recently there have been some particular festivals introduced and established by a range of institutions for the sake of charity or other purpose. Although what factors lead to such phenomena and how they affect our daily life are not particularly widely discussed topics, there has been some interesting move worth discussion. From my perspective, the following reasons need to be taken into consideration.

I suppose the first and most important reason for introducing these special days is that they hope people rekindle their concern{ sympathize} with underdogs, for example, the children, women and the disabled { handicapped}individuals. In order to meet the demand of them, we have to devote more time and energy to help them; thereby contributing to the harmony and stability of the society.

Another factor that we must consider is that we humanity have conducted numerous unadvisable matters to our homeland which we call it ”Global village”. Some environmentalists and eco-friendly communities highly recommend establishing special days
such as ”Low-Carbon Day” or “Earth hour” to wake up public awareness towards nature preservation. These actions aim to increase citizens’ consciousness about environment and appeal to make a binding deal in reducing greenhouse gas emissions.

The third and vital reason is that some sociologists and archeologists are anxious about traditional cultures’ extinction and call on measures to be taken to prevent them from dying out. In their eyes, it is a brilliant to treat a certain day as a national-wide holiday. Via their efforts, a great deal more relics and ancestral architectures have come back into public horizons. Thanks to these anniversaries, children today are more likely to form good habits like treasuring the antiquities leaved by precedents.

These particular days should be well taken into consideration since they exert profound influence on our society. In my opinion, authorities and non-government organizations should conjunct to organize more rituals and ceremonies celebrating these days to promote public awareness on how to make our surroundings a better habitat for all humanity.

EmilySUID: 2922208

LZ。。。请稍微看看英文的书啊报纸啊之类的。。。词汇表达用法之类的问题太多太多了。。。

或者先从简单的词汇开始用吧。。。

扇舞丹青UID: 2905322

改：Some environmentalists and eco-friendly communities highly recommend  that we establish special days

扇舞丹青UID: 2905322

改：
It is an indisputable fact that an awareness of public environmental protection needs to be enhanced

扇舞丹青UID: 2905322

THX for your "help 2# EmilyS

扇舞丹青UID: 2905322

对 看的很少 大学就不学英语了。呵呵 一战没写完5.5 之后 二战6就比较满足了。 只能说我对这个话题很不熟悉 我相信你说的很对 他们都有习惯性的表述 而我因为都没有看过相关的东西 所以很陌生 在自己造一些短语和表达。 但是我现在就是因为来不及像你说得那样循序渐进的去提高 才把特定的一篇作文拿上来求批的。whatever, thanks for your help 2# EmilyS

EmilySUID: 2922208

扇舞丹青UID: 2905322

昨天没想到你给我这么细致得改了，我自己就在你的建议下进行了彻底的修改，把我想表达的意思查到了比较确切的英文表述和例句，然后进行了修改，今天看到你细致的订正，我又借鉴了你的一些表达（红色部分），但是仍存在一些争议（绿色部分）

Recently there have been some particular days introduced and established by many organizations
for the sake of charity or other purpose. The direct reasons leading to this phenomenon and the possible effects on the public have drawn a public attention. From my perspective, the following reasons need to be taken into consideration.
I suppose the first and most important reason for introducing these particular occasions is that they hope people retain sympathy for social disadvantaged
groups such as the the urban migrant worker, the laid-off workers and the handicapped. Setting up these days, such as veterans day helps to urge more concerns for them; thereby reminding people of devoting more time and effort to ensure their quality of life.

Another factor that we must consider is that devastating environmental pollution and climatic change inspire environmentalists and other green organizations to speculate on
days with particular meaning such as ”Low-Carbon Day” or “Earth hour” to raise public awareness of environment protection .Obviously, these measures are beginning to play a role in reducing greenhouse gas emissions and diminishing destruction of ozone layer.

The third and significant reason is that some sociologists and archeologists are anxious about traditional cultures’ extinction and call on measures to be taken to prevent them from dying out. Fortunately, they have focused efforts on publicizing certain dates such as The Heritage Day in China and made cultural protection back to the public eye. Thanks to these anniversaries, people today are prone to cherish heritages and traditonal customs.

These particular days should be well taken into account since they exert profound influence on our society. In my opinion, authorities and non-governmental organizations should combined together to create more rituals celebrating these days to make our surroundings a better place for living.

For the sake of =for the purpose of helping /in order to help .

因为看到了十天这本书上的如下例句，

Many elderly people prefer to live in the countryside for the sake of their health.

我就造了上面那个句子，，，，还是看不出错误在哪里。。。

弱势群体： disadvantaged groups ;不过你用minority 比我错用underdogs 好太多了！！

Jeopardize :后面跟抽象的东西-慎小姨，好像不能跟environment

4veterans day  OR veteran’s day

扇舞丹青UID: 2905322

http://img208.poco.cn/mypoco/myphoto/20101115/06/5581291420101115065713053_640.jpg

EmilyS 发表于 2010-11-15 06:58

非常感动 看到你的帮助，而且你是在国外帮忙改的吗？显示时间是凌晨。。。20号就考试了，你的帮助对我来说意义重大！ 此外，在考试的时候我会记得你的提醒，就是用自己确定的句型和表达 ，而不是胡编乱造，写一些莫名奇妙的句子。。。。。。非常感谢你的帮助！

67169619UID: 2320695

赞认真，相信会进步得很快的

EmilySUID: 2922208

for the sake of charity, 后面是不能带and other purpose的。建议google.

put environment in jeopardy 是常见词...新闻天天能看到...

建议多google和看yourdictionary.com上面的例句。

EmilySUID: 2922208

你的第三波我之前改过不过你貌似没看过。。。可以考虑去看一下，估计也能有些启发。

扇舞丹青UID: 2905322

嗯 太好了 谢谢 12# EmilyS

扇舞丹青UID: 2905322

Emilys~你觉得我考试时应该特别注意什么呢  求6分  能不能给一些建议呢 12# EmilyS

EmilySUID: 2922208

6分是什么标准。。。我其实也不知道啊。。。可以开个贴问问别人考到6分的是在怎么样一个水平吧。。。