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[作文] sun3may托福作文练习 [复制链接]

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发表于 2011-3-27 09:18:05 |显示全部楼层
呃,我还没写到tpo14,等写到的时候再帮你改哈 119# sun3may

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发表于 2011-3-27 12:39:16 |显示全部楼层
121# tulipzong 可以~多谢!

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发表于 2011-3-27 16:15:22 |显示全部楼层
3.27独立感谢修改的同学!

3.27独立 by sun3may.doc

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发表于 2011-3-28 15:23:41 |显示全部楼层
3.26 revised

3.26独立 by sun3may.doc

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长跑

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发表于 2011-3-28 21:15:45 |显示全部楼层
实在抱歉,前几天比较忙没时间改,这是你 25号得独立写作。。sorry~Do you agree that the government shouldsupport the scientific research even There is no practical
use

Some scientific experiments enlighten uswith its profound and far-reaching influence on the society, though they mayfail to increase neither our productivity nor economic exponents. As a result,I strongly believe that it is necessity for the government to support thoseacademic researches, as the reasons I will present as follows. (Very Good Opening!)

The first factor coming into my mind isthat some researches may do nothing for the industrial practices, on thecontrary, they could pave the way for the development of certain objects. Takethe social behavior study for an instance, Psychology scientists conducted aseries of experiment about the relations between nerves and behaviors of dogs.Though their outcomes rarely put into industrial practices, the series ofresearches are the primary and fundamental milestones of behavior studies.Therefore, to advance the improvement of sociology, government should offerfunds to the sociologists.

Adding more credibility to my points ofview is that studies on the ancient antiques bring us much knowledge about theprimitive people, with the purpose to learn more about our ancestor. In orderto complete and refine our knowledge about the past, government should provideadequate money and updated facilities for the Archeologists. Indeed, learningthe past has few effects on the social practices, but we cannot deny that it isour curiosity and responsibility to trace back to the past and refine ourhistory. (这一段的thesis statement有点模糊,好像直接上example的感觉)

In addition, sometimes it may be difficultto figure our(out) whether a specific scientificresearch can be beneficial to our industrial practices. Both the process of thediscovering of Newton's principles, and the "sun center" theoriesmake appropriate examples indicating that we could not deny the practical useof any scientific experiment, in the term of their future influences.Accordingly, government should support those researches even though they are ofno practical use in the present.

In conclusion, government should supportall the scientific researches, including those which have less practical uses.
个人感觉写得非常好,每段论证有statement+ illustration + example 结构很清楚;句式也很丰富,用词上面基于我的能力跳不出毛病;如果非要指出缺点,那其实可以再论述一些research with practical use 不好的地方,然后在反驳,这样子会显得你的分析更客观。
23/4 Toefl; end of August Gmat.I will be there

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发表于 2011-3-29 02:25:52 |显示全部楼层
26号的独立修改,不好意思晚这么多

3.26独立 by sun3may.doc

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发表于 2011-3-29 13:56:21 |显示全部楼层
3月28日 修改

3.27独立 by sun3may.doc

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发表于 2011-3-29 19:49:56 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 zhennupt 于 2011-3-29 19:51 编辑

123# sun3may

327修改. 麻烦请回该我的, 谢谢啦.

3.27 by sun3may.doc

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发表于 2011-3-30 11:21:41 |显示全部楼层
感觉写的很不好,求狠拍~
唔。。。感谢修改~

3.29独立by sun3may.doc

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发表于 2011-3-30 23:17:36 |显示全部楼层
已改

revise.doc

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发表于 2011-3-31 17:27:54 |显示全部楼层
3.31独立~
时间刚好,感觉内容不是特别丰富。
感谢修改!

3.31独立(09-12-14)by sun3may.doc

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发表于 2011-4-1 10:52:34 |显示全部楼层
3.31独立(09-12-14)by sun3may_revised.doc (29.5 KB, 下载次数: 6)

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发表于 2011-4-1 16:32:28 |显示全部楼层
4.1独立+综合~
独立写的是机经,具体题目见文档。
综合写的是TPO-14
感谢修改!

4.1独立(09-11-20)by sun3may.doc

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4.1综合 By sun3may.doc

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发表于 2011-4-2 14:50:20 |显示全部楼层
4.1 revised

4.1独立(09-11-20)by sun3may.doc

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长跑

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发表于 2011-4-2 23:15:05 |显示全部楼层
好了 4.01

4.1独立(09-11-20)by sun3may-revised by justin234.doc

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