IBT独立作文 TPO 3 求批改~~~~

CoryanUID: 2993557

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
It is more important to keep your old friends than it is to make new friends.  Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.


There is no denying that friendship is of great importance in our lives and whether we should try to make new friends has been a prevalent topic . Some people hold the idea that we should keep our old friends and it is unnessary to develop new relationships ,while other people in a large number , get a total opposite opinion. They argue that new friends can help us adapt to new environment as soon as possible . Besides, our life may change as our ages and of course the environment around us will vary among our old friends .And I am inclined to the view that the latter can hold water for several reasons .

First of all , making new friends may lay a solid foundation for our future life in a new environment
,for the reaon that they can introduce many informations and give some useful advice to us, which may play a vital role in one’s work and life . Lending credence to my position is the example of Jane , one of my best friends , that when she go to a new class 3 years ago ,she felt neverous about her study and life ,but with the help of her new friends ,Kuki , she adapted to her new class quickly . So , new friends are really act as significant roles in any new environment .

Secondly , as time went by ,our old friends may have different choice and the environment around them can be various , and as a result ,gradually and eventually ,we will find that less topics can contact us .According to an interesting survey conducted by a famous digest , people in an overwelming number feel diffcult to find a common topic and chat with their old friends for a long time .Therefore , the circle of our friends should change as our living environment changing and only through this ,can we keep a happy and positive life style .

Admittedly , old friends always tend to be more careful and warm . They may have a better knowledge about you and can understand your thoughts quicker . However , every old friend used to be a new friend and every new friend is possible to become an old friend , which means that your new friend also can share all of your mood and ideas as the relationship developing .Therefore , it is a really negative opinion to avoid making new friends .

All in all , making new friends should be put in an increasingly essential position in our life . Considering different environment among old friends and the irreplaceable function of new friends ,we have to admit that new friends and relationships will be an vital and significant role in every stage in our life and may serve as a catalyst for work and life .

CoryanUID: 2993557

自己稍微用红笔改了一点儿小错误~~具体的结构上和词句用法还望各位前辈指导~多谢多谢~~~

wgc1990UID: 2942629

LZ我无意冒犯，优点我就不说了我就挑我觉得不太好的地方吧
就从句子来说感觉有种读四级作文的感觉。。。some people之类的可以换一下，加一些比较生的词并不能使文章出色许多，多炼炼句子。
你的开头“一些人xxx,另一些人xxx,你认为后者xxx”这样的写法是很容易吃亏的，要写明白你所说的the latter是哪一个，要让考官在第一时间明白你的观点。
再看逻辑

1，新朋友在新环境中提供帮助
2，时间久了老朋友共同话题会少
3，老朋友更careful和warm,但老朋友也曾是新朋友，所以新朋友也可以careful和warm
综上，你站在new friend一边。
你觉得你认不认可这样的逻辑。
一直挑毛病LZ别介意。
就说这么多  LZ加油。

CoryanUID: 2993557

:D 灰常感谢哈~~我会改进，继续加油哒~~