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forestpencilUID: 2856323

谢谢善良的斑竹！我是4.21考的，求改~
题目：ARGUMENT13 - In an attempt to improve highway safety, Prunty County last year lowered its speed limit from 55 to 45 miles per hour on all county highways. But this effort has failed the number of accidents has not decreased, and, based on reports by the highway patrol, many drivers are exceeding the speed limit. Prunty County should instead undertake the same kind of road improvement project that Butler County completed five years ago increasing lane widths, resurfacing rough highways, and improving visibility at dangerous intersections. Today, major Butler County roads still have a 55 mph speed limit, yet there were 25 percent fewer reported accidents in Butler County this past year than there were five years ago.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

At first glance, the suggestion sounds convincing that Prunty County should improve the road condition in return for a decrease in traffic accidents instead of merely limiting the speed. However, several evidences should be found and weighed before we embrace this suggestion.
This argument provides the case of Butler County as an example to demonstrate the effectiveness/desire effect of improving/polishing road conditions. However, the description of the improvement is ambiguous. It merely gives out a 25% decline of reported accident rate without informing us the base value of this percentage, so we don't really know how significant the improvement is. If initially there had been few traffic accidents in Butler County, then a 25% decrease is not so dramatic as it first appears.
  
Even if the decline of traffic accidents in Butler County proves to have been significant, it is still necessary to find out whether the decline is really caused by the road condition improvement. After all, on the surface is the concurrence between road condition improvement and the alleviation of traffic conditions, the latter of which may be due to an increasing awareness of drivers in more dangerous areas with the enduring five-year-progress of time.
If we can corroborate the efficiency of the procedures taken by Butler, it is still doubtful whether the measure can be applied to Prunty County without tailoring it to the local conditions. This argument doesn't provide the causes of traffic accidents in either county mentioned. It may well be the case that drivers in Butler were having trouble dealing with narrow, rough, windy roads without mirrors in the corner, whereas in Prunty the road is smooth and wide enough with few twists and turns.
The last evidence we have to search for is to what extent the description of the consequence of the new regulation is reliable. “many drivers” is a vague description, which may be unconsciously altered by the patrols who are oversensitive to drivers who is resistant to new traffic regulations, or purposely distorted by them to admonish the public the severity of traffic conditions as an approach to raise their awareness to potential danger when driving on a highway. Moreover, this illusion or fact that many drivers neglects new speed limit doesn’t automatically prove that all drivers don’t obey this new rule. As long as there are a considerable proportion of drivers willing to follow the restriction, the limit is taking effect, which may not be revealed by a decrease in accidents, but by a decline in the average severity of the accidents, which has been omitted in the reasoning.
In a word, the effectiveness of either a road improvement campaign or a stricter speed limit cannot be fully revealed without more thorough investigations on different extents and causes of accidents between Butler and Prunty.

1# 咖啡盐

treemantanUID: 2770681

4.21G,终于憋出第一篇了。。求楼主大大拍
Argument:No.1   Woven baskets characterized by a particular distinctive pattern have previously been found only in the immediate vicinity of the prehistoric village of Palea and therefore were believed to have been made only by the Palean people. Recently, however, archaeologists discovered such a "Palean" basket in Lithos, an ancient village across the Brim River from Palea. The Brim River is very deep and broad, and so the ancient Paleans could have crossed it only by boat, and no Palean boats have been found. Thus it follows that the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean.
  
   In the argument, the author claims that the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean. The speaker's statement is largely based on the evidence that no Palean boats by which she believes that they can only travel across the Brim River that is very deep and broad nowadays have been found. However, the author needs to provide additional evidence so that we can better evaluate the soundness of her argument.

First and foremost, even if the Brim River is very deep and broad at present, it does not necessarily mean that the river was deep and broad at that ancient time. If these possibilities are true, it is natural to expect that the ancient Paleans could cross the river on foot. Therefore, the author needs to provide additional information, such as regarding the depth and width of the river, to rule out the aforementioned possibilities, or else she cannot legitimately claim that so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean.

  Secondly, even if the Brim River was always very deep and broad at that Palean time, it is still presumable that the ancient Paleans could have crossed it not only by boat but also raft or even swimming. If these possibilities are true, then the author cannot legitimately claim that because no boats were found and the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean. Only if the author can provide additional evidence to rule out the above alternatives can she legitimately claim that the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean.
  
  Thirdly, even if the above addtional evidence which embrace the author are given, it is still possible that the Palean were uniquely Palean because, during the ancient time, the boat which have not be found was made of woods or something which was likely to be eaten. If these possibilities are true, then the author cannot induce that the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean.

In sum,only if the author provides additional evidence can we better evaluate the soundness of her argument.


对于Instruction有点疑问；

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

这是要写某些论据可以拿来削弱或者加强论证，而我全文则是强调作者犯了论据不足，从第一点B-River古今可能不同，到第二点即使古今一致，也有其他到达Lithos的方法，最后即使前面的可能作者都提供了相应的论据，也还可能因为古时候船多是木船，已经由于年代久远，被腐蚀，而找不到，而不能由于找不到而推出没有船，从而推出作者需要提供更多的论据来支撑他的论证的完备性。（我的疑问是，这种Instruction的行文思路是可否转化为作者需要提供额外论据）

lizlee0420UID: 3163467

我的argument处女作，憋了50分钟，第11题  我是4月21考，帮我看看思路吧 谢谢善良的斑竹！
Merely based on the senseless reasoning,the author hastily makes the false and misleading conclusion that the proposed measure of limiting the supply of new housing will result in a significant increase in housing prices in Maple County.The author makes such egregious mistakes such as cause and effect,false analogy and insufficient statistical investigations and analysis.

First of all,the author commits the "cause and effect"wrongness.It's assertive for the author to draw the conclusion that limiting the supply of new housing will inevitably result in a significant increase in housing prices.Nevertheless,other relevant grounds might influence the housing price as well,say, the inflation, the general economic tendency and the population.If  there is certain evidence that Maple County will suffer a crisis,a economy depression in the future,with many dwellers emigrating to other place,then the demand on new housing,accordingly,will not necessarily be high,therefor leading the price of new housing to decrease on the contrary.Moreover,it's highly possible that the aforesaid reason has nothing to do with the alleged result.

In addition,the proponents and opponents of the proposed measure both make the conclusion by falsely making the irrational analogy between the state of housing price in Chestnut and Pine County and that of the Maple County ,ignoring the gaps of various situations between them such as size,population,local economic policy made by governors and the general economic tendency.Besides,even though it may prove true that the two counties bear enough resemblance to Maple County to compare,it's taken for granted that Chestnut County remained unchanged over the past ten years,and Pine County the past fifteen years.Due to the variances as size and development,the scenario now could be far different from that time.

What's more,there is a severe weakness in the statistical investigation. The amount of the sample may be not adequate enough to support the analyses.It's highly possible that they investigated 1000 houses,however the entire investigation is around 10000.And the vaguely usage of "modestly"and"significant"is too subjective to insinuate a large number of the sample,maybe the increase in Chestnut County is modest compared with that in the Pine County,but relatively significant when compared with itself.

To sum up,the conclusion reached in the argument lacks tenability since the evidence cited in the analysis does not lend strong support to what the author claims.To make the argument more compelling,the author should provide more information concerning representative statistical evidence.To better evaluate the argument,we need more convincing evidence that the significant increase on house price mainly due to limiting the supply of new housing.

fu7233362UID: 2363223

第一次发练习，求狠拍。

28. The surest indicator of a great nationis represented not by the achievements of its rulers, artists, or scientists,but by the general welfare of its people.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to whichyou agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for theposition you take. In developing and supporting your position, you shouldconsider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explainhow these considerations shape your position.




The statement claim the general welfare of peopleis the surest indicator or a great nation rather than the achievement of itsrules, artists, or scientist. However, the indicators of a great nation arecomplex and different indicators show different aspects of a great nation. Itend to agree that the general welfare will be an authority indicator of agreat nation, but the achievements of its rulers, artists or scientists areanother important indicator. As a matter of fact, there is not any conflict forthe two indicators. A great nation usually gets extraordinary achievements inpolitic, art, and science and provides good general welfare for its people.


First the general welfare of people is the vitalindicator of a great nation. Without good general welfare, the nation will benot a great nation, even if there are huge achievements of its rulers, artist,or scientists. The Soviet Union is a suitable negative example to emphasis theimportance of the general welfare. The former biggest nation in the world is the first country which sent human into outer space. The great achievementsabout the nation in art and science still are commended by us. However, TheSoviet Union provided a awful welfare for its people. It was astonished thatthe people in this powerful country can’t purchase enough commodities for theirlife. That is the main reason that the giant nation broke down with only 80years history. A nation can’t be named as a great nation if it was abandoned byits people.


On the other hand, the achievements ofrulers, artist, or scientists are another important indicator to judge anation. The nation should have huge contributions for our world if we claim thenation as a great nation. The achievements of politic, art, or science are thetreasures of mankind.  There are somesmall countries in the world which provide generous benefit to their people fortheir plenty mineral resources, but they can’t be named great nations. TheSaudi Arabia owes more than 10% petroleum of earth and earns great dollars fromexport. The general welfare of its people is better than most of western countries.However, it is difficult on the list of great nations for little achievementsin other areas.


Finally, a great nation usually provides agood general welfare for its people through its huge achievements in politic,art and science. There are few nations which owe plenty mine. Another, anynation can’t export their mine forever because mineral resources are limited. Agreat nation needs continuous innovation in science, technology, politic,economic and art if it want to provide sustainable welfare for its people. The U.S.Ais the model of a great nation. The huge achievements of  politic, science, technology, culture,economic and art provide the plenty material resources for a good generalwelfare of its people.




In sum, to be name a great notion, thecountry needs to provide a good welfare for its people. But it is not enough.The achievements of its rulers, artists and scientists are another important  indicator.

niuniuaUID: 3274179

多谢~！
87) Claim: Any piece of information referred to as a fact should be mistrusted, since it may well be proven false in the future.
Reason: Much of the information that people assume is factual actually turns out to be inaccurate.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.

response:

As the writer has stated in the claim and reason, much of the information that people assume is factual actually turns out to be inaccurate so that  writer suggest that any piece of information should be mistrusted since it may well be proven false finally.As far as I am concerned, this claim is not fair because the information cannot be all false .Therefore, I partly agree with the writer's opinion.

In the history of human's civilization, there are a few cases which can demonstrate that we should mistrust the so-called fact which  was  proven false latter.Consider Copernicus,he didn't believe that the earth is the center of cosmos.After years of observations, he finally justify that our earth where we live on is travelling around the sun.This great found  broke the stereotype which has bound people's mind for many years and make people to look the classic theory differently.This is the mistrustion's unbelievable effect ,it instruct intellegent people to find the real truth.

But not any piece of information refered to as a fact must be false.Such facts that  earth is approximately round ,moon goes around earth periodically is  undoubtable.Thus we can infer a conclusion like that any piece of information which have not be subtly scutinized but refered to as a fact should be mistrusted.Former example about  the center of cosmos can be attribiuted into this kind of group since we have never justify  earth is the center of cosmos but believe this is true with no doubt just because a primer famous philosopher had ever said .Once a fact has been prudently scrutinized and it is justified right ,we have no reason to mistrust it.

So we should propose sufficient evidences either when we are giving out a conclusion or when we are mistrusting a given conclusion.The mistrusting to a existed conclusion without evidences cannot be appropriate and convincing.All we need is to turn a fair and objective attitude to the existed information refered to as a fact.

咖啡盐UID: 2973669

80# niuniua

87) Claim: Any piece of information referred to as a fact should be mistrusted, since it may well be proven false in the future.
Reason: Much of the information that people assume is factual actually turns out to be inaccurate.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.




response:

As the writer has stated in the claim and reason, much of the information that people assume is factual actually turns out to be inaccurate so that  writer suggest that any piece of information should be mistrusted since it may well be proven false finally.【这么长一句话没有任何实质意义，完全抄题目。e.g. there is a common sense in today's life that we cannot definitely trucst any kind of information we get, for the reason that it may be actually proven incorrect. 】As far as I am concerned, this claim is not fair because the information cannot be all false .【题目并没有说all fault，the reason is much of them may be inaccurate actually.】Therefore, I partly agree with the writer's opinion.【你这里的position有些混乱哪。claim只说要用怀疑的眼光看待得到的信息，reason才是说这些信息事实上可能是不准确的。如果是partly agree的话，可以这么说: in my point of view, i do on the side of the claim that we should deal with information which refer to as a fact, but it not because the information may be inaccurate, contrarily, our purpose is to certifiy the fact is absolutely veridical. 大概表达这种意思，一方面细化你的立场表达，给出一个明确的目标，再一个也可以升华你的主题，不至于太模糊或者干巴巴，没有目的性。给出立场就是要树立一个明确的目标。 】

【Admittedly,】In 【Over】the 【long】 history of human's civilization, there are a few cases【examples】 which can demonstrate that we should mistrust the so-called fact which  was  proven false latter. 【这样的句子虽然不能说错误，但老外不喜欢。lots of examples expressed that those so-called factuals were demonstrated as the truth at first, but were proven false latter. 】Consider Copernicus,he didn't believe that the earth is the center of cosmos.【这里欠缺一个表达，关于地心说在当时被认定是真理的定义。虽然大家都知道，但你必须说出来，这样你才能呼应前面的论据，那些本来是事实的事情，其实是不对的。】After years of observations, he finally justify that【our earth is a normal planet in the cosmos rather than the center of it. else, it travels around the sun. 】 our earth where we live on is travelling around the sun.This great found  broke the stereotype which has bound people's mind for many years and make people to look the classic theory differently.【个人觉得这个定义下的不好，不是不同地方法去看待经典理论，应该是帮助人们认清真正的世界或者事实，这才是他的意义所在，不仅仅说从其他的角度去看待经典理论。】This is the mistrustion's unbelievable effect ,it instruct intellegent people to find the real truth.


But 【However, but作为开头太低级了。】not any piece of information refered to as a fact must be false.【题目说的是may be，不是must be】Such facts that  earth is approximately round ,moon goes around earth periodically is  undoubtable.Thus we can infer a conclusion like that any piece of information which have not be subtly scutinized but refered to as a fact should be mistrusted.Former example about  the center of cosmos can be attribiuted into this kind of group since we have never justify  earth is the center of cosmos but believe this is true with no doubt just because a primer famous philosopher had ever said .Once a fact has been prudently scrutinized and it is justified right ,we have no reason to mistrust it.【你这段怎么说呢，挺有新意的，但是个人觉得并没有达到预期的效果。托勒密的地心说已经成为了一个体系，并非没有很好的去论证，只是错误不会去改变，即使在完善总是错误，因为一开始就错了，总会被攻破；同样的，对的事情，哪怕现在没有被证实，但总有一天会被证实的。而并不是说对于那些没有很好证明的事务我们要持怀疑态度，而那些成体系的理论是可以相信的。这一段从主旨看，你的论据方向在于并不是所有的事实都是错的，那么哪些是对的呢？为什么说这些是对的呢？我也有些乱了诶....你的position到底是部分同意我们对事务要持怀疑态度呢，还是部分同意所谓的事实都可能被证明是错的。从你的论据上看，我觉得你是后者，那么这道题你就偏了，因为主要的claim是说我们对待这些事情的态度，而非所谓事实的真伪。】

So we should propose sufficient evidences either when we are giving out a conclusion or when we are mistrusting a given conclusion.The mistrusting to a existed conclusion without evidences cannot be appropriate and convincing.All we need is to turn a fair and objective attitude to the existed information refered to as a fact.

=================================================
这类抽象的话题，有些难度，LZ可以再深入思考下，适当缩小自己的position，将难度降低。

ripperseanUID: 2523263

9.  In any field of endeavor, it is impossible to make a significant contribution without first being strongly influenced by past achievements within that field.
在任何一个领域，在没有受过该领域过去取得成就的影响的情况下，是不可能做出重大
贡献的。
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.


提纲：正  1、知识是连续的，后人的成就都建立在前人之上
             2、即使是新领域也是之前领域的某个成果。例，电脑
        反  过多的影响就会禁锢住思想

昨天晚上写了半个小时发现没思路，就复习别的去了。今天有思路了写了1个多小时。易改修改润色过，532个词。请狠拍。
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The author of this issue argued that one must be strongly influenced first by past achievement within a field before he can make a significant contribution. Although this claim may be categorically applied in some circumstances and there needs certain modification, I partly agree with the author.

To begin with, in any field, knowledge is consecutive, established by our primogenitor. It's like a building made of bricks that everyone who made an achievement set up a brick and makes the building higher and more imposing. Before a man can make a contribution in a field, he had to study hard on it, or many fields. Then by fully understanding what he had learned and after serious thinking, a new idea can be brought out for later verification.  When a kid goes to school, he was taught not only the knowledge itself developed by predecessor, but also the way to think and behave. Thus, what he does and how he has in mind, is all strongly influenced by prior achievement. An idea depends on nothing is meaningless not only the hollow fundamental, but others don't know what they can depend on to verify the idea.

What's more, in my opinion, there is no field which can standalone totally which has no intersection with others. In another word, even a brand new field, which is very revolutionary, is an achievement of the former field. Take computers for example. Computer is first designed on military to predict missile path, which makes it a successful achievement on the field of electronics. Then only decades past, computer science and its succeeding field, Internet, have become the most booming fields in the world. The leading companies in computer, such as Apple, IBM, MicroSoft, acting as considerable achievement in the field of computer, are the achievement of electronic practically.  Thus, a strong influence primarily by past achievement is a condition of further achievement in an existing field or a new one.

However, when the influence by past achievement is so strong that one can't even accept creativity, the historical achievement becomes a mind jail that keeps others away and locks himself in. Past achievements are supposed to be a fundamental knowledge for later generations and offer an optional way of considering problems, but not a criterion or doctrine to follow without any doubt. Actually, doubt is a very important way on knowledge innovation, especially on science. When Einstein proposed Quantum Theory, he and many other young scientists, whom are especially famous later such as Heisenberg and Bose, were all strongly opposed by many more experienced physicists as it violates Classic physics. Accepting Quantum theory needs people to abandon the principles of classic physics, which were being denied by experienced physicists at that time, and it turned out that Quantum Theory is right. Therefore, it is essential for one to treat accomplished achievements in a correct way and only depend on this, new great achievement can be made.

In a conclusion, a person must be strongly influenced by past achievement before he makes his own great one. Yet, if he doesn't put past achievement in a suitable place in his mind, the restriction and limitation of incorrect thought will make him do nothing.

咖啡盐UID: 2973669

82# rippersean

.  In any field of endeavor, it is impossible to make a significant contribution without first being strongly influenced by past achievements within that field.
在任何一个领域，在没有受过该领域过去取得成就的影响的情况下，是不可能做出重大
贡献的。
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.


提纲：正  1、知识是连续的，后人的成就都建立在前人之上
             2、即使是新领域也是之前领域的某个成果。例，电脑
        反  过多的影响就会禁锢住思想

昨天晚上写了半个小时发现没思路，就复习别的去了。今天有思路了写了1个多小时。易改修改润色过，532个词。请狠拍。
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The author of this issue argued that one must be strongly influenced first by past achievement within a field before he can make a significant contribution. Although this claim may be categorically applied in some circumstances and there needs certain modification【没看懂】, I partly agree with the author.

To begin with, in any field, knowledge is consecutive, established by our primogenitor. 【good，观点很明确，也不拖沓。】It's 【It is正式文本一般不缩写】like a building made of bricks that everyone who made an achievement set up a brick and makes the building higher and more imposing. Before a man can make a contribution in a field, he had to study hard on it, or many【other】 fields. Then by 【through】fully understanding what he had learned and after 【删】serious thinking, a new idea can be brought out for later verification.【For instance, 】  When a kid goes to school, he was taught not only the knowledge itself 【没看懂这个词在这里的意义】developed by predecessor, but also the way to think and behave. Thus, what he does and how he has in mind,【how he thinks】 is all strongly influenced by prior achievement.【what predecessors did in the past内容上与前文保持一致会比较好点。前文并没有提到prior achievement，给人有些突兀的感觉。】 An idea depends on nothing【without any support of systems or theories】
is meaningless not only the hollow fundamental, but others don't know what they can depend on to verify the idea.【段落论证的结构挺不错的，最近看着最舒服的一篇，看得出有用心。只是在内容上，个人认为还显得不足。你这段论证的核心结合题目来看就是one's significant contribution is depend on formers' achievement. 本段在论证的内容上对于make achievement这一点并没有很好的表现出来。对于主题的支撑上就略显不足了。idea并不一定是great achievement. everyday, anytime, we can generate countless idea, but significant contributions are not easy to make. 在例子的使用上没有扣准主题。】

What's more, in my opinion【删】, there is no field which can standalone totally【动词呢？】 which has no intersection with others.【两个从句一个意思，而且老外也不认同这样的从句结构。there could not be a kind of field that has not any intersection with others. 一个从句能表达完整就不需要再去加一句了。】 In another word, even a brand new field【没懂，是个固定短语？】, which is very revolutionary【regarding as an innovation,revolution是革命，口味有点重，而且意思也不对，革命是要推翻就有事物的，所以建议用革新比较好些。】, is an achievement of the former field. Take【 the phylogeny of】 computers for【as an】 example. Computer is first designed on military to predict missile path, which makes it a successful achievement on the field of electronics. Then only decades past, computer science and its succeeding field, Internet, have become the most booming fields in the world. The leading companies in computer, such as Apple, IBM, MicroSoft, acting as considerable achievement in the field of computer, are the achievement of electronic practically.  Thus, a strong influence primarily by past achievement is a condition of further achievement in an existing field or a new one.【同样地问题，你这里的例子依然有些偏啊。你的TS是即使是新兴事物也是依托旧有事物而发展起来的。论证部分并没有很好的表达出这一点，相反给我的感觉是草草了事了。其实你完全可以以Internet作为新兴事物来进行论证。Internet领域的发展目的是为了方便电脑间的方便交流，依托电脑为发展基础慢慢演化（不知道对不对，反正不学这块的）。那么，一个人想在Internet领域做出巨大贡献，势必要对电脑有一个很深刻的了解。】

However, when the influence by past achievement is so strong that one can't even accept creativity, the historical achievement becomes a mind jail that keeps others away and locks himself in.【if one excessively follows the achievements made by our senior, the things he/she gets would be an obstruction rather than a promotion.】 Past achievements are supposed to be a fundamental knowledge for later generations and offer an optional way of considering problems, but not a criterion or doctrine to follow without any doubt. Actually, doubt is a very important way on knowledge innovation, especially on science. 【Consider】 When Einstein proposed Quantum Theory, he and many other young scientists, whom are especially famous later such as Heisenberg and Bose, were all strongly opposed by many more experienced physicists as it violates Classic physics. Accepting Quantum theory needs people to abandon the principles of classic physics, which were being denied by experienced physicists at that time, and it turned out that Quantum Theory is right. Therefore, it is essential for one to treat accomplished achievements in a correct way and only depend on this, new great achievement can be made.【还是老问题，三段都存在同样地问题。例子的支撑对于论据显得有些不足。你这里的TS想表达过于去遵循前人的贡献会形成桎梏。例子里，爱因斯坦的量子论打破了经典物理的定义。接受量子理论就要放弃原有的规则什么什么的（反正我是看不懂的）。只是，你的重点应该放在爱因斯坦是如何提出量子论的，而不是量子论与经典物理哪一个是对的。为什么爱因斯坦会提出量子理论，因为他们没有完全遵照前人的思路，而是由自己的思考的，然后你还可以对比一个同时期，完全信奉经典物理的著名学者，这样才比较容易突出你的主题。】

In a conclusion, a person must be strongly influenced by past achievement before he makes his own great one. Yet, if he doesn't put past achievement in a suitable place in his mind, the restriction and limitation of incorrect thought will make him do nothing.

====================================================

整体文章结构还行吧，知道自己在写什么。论据的把握上挺好的，观点清晰，不足在于段落中的逻辑部分没有处理地很好，对于寻找论据支撑点部分稍显不足。

加油！

ripperseanUID: 2523263

79) Since those issues of Newsbeat magazine that featured political news on their front cover were the poorest-selling issues over the past three years, the publisher of Newsbeat has recommended that the magazine curtail its emphasis on politics to focus more exclusively on economics and personal finance. She points to a recent survey of readers of general interest magazines that indicates greater reader interest in economic issues than in political ones. Newsbeat's editor, however, opposes the proposed shift in editorial policy, pointing out that very few magazines offer extensive political coverage anymore.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

之前看到咖啡盐版主的这个帖子https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mo ... 5060&highlight=，于是想卡时间写一下这篇文章。写之前看了一下帖子说的是啥了，算是偷懒了吧，呵呵。。。已自改单词错误，请版主狠拍。
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As the argument above, the author recommended that the magazine curtails its emphasis on politics to focus more exclusively on economics and personal finance. It seems at first glance to be an obvious conclusion that transferring from politics to economics is a boost in sell. However, close scrutiny of the argument reveals the recommendation may not obtain the predicted result, rife with holes of evidence.


First and foremost, the author needs to answer the question that whether the style of the magazine, not the quality of content or the selling price, is the only factor that leads to the poorest-selling situation. On one hand, in any kinds of magazines, people tend to read the ones which have high-quality context filled with ideas and thoughts that truly values. It works especially on politics as comments and critics on politics need further objective insight, but not acting as a toady for a party or a policy. On the other hand, selling price is another important factor that can determine whether people will buy them. If the magazines were too expensive to get equivalent messages and informations, no one would spend money on them.


In addition, the question has to be answered that whether the opinion of the readers who received the recent survey can represent that of all readers where this magazine can publish.  Perhaps the survey was done in a magazine which focusses especially on economics and personal finance. In that case, most readers who take the survey are fans of economics and then, the result that indicates greater reader in economic issues than in political ones is lame.


What's more, the author needs to answer that whether only few people purchase the magazines on politics, which leads to unprofitableness, is the cause of the situation that very few magazines offer extensive political coverage anymore. The author did not show the evidence that low number of magazines is because no money can earn. However, several factors can cause this. For instance, topics on politics are hard to write well and only a few magazines can meet the highly demanding of huge quantity readers of politics, which results in the existing of few magazines that can offer extensive political coverage.


In sum, the author recommended to transfer magazine's focus from politics to economics and personal finance. Nevertheless, the statments not well reasoned for lack of strong support for what the author maintains. To make it logically acceptable, the questions above have to be answered to achieve a more sufficient conclusion. In addition, in order to solidify the argument, more evidence is required on curtailing its emphasis on politics which was its original sign of this magazine.

niuniuaUID: 3274179

83# 咖啡盐

版主，你好，上次你帮我修改的非常详细，我觉得要再写一篇才能对得住这修改啊~哈哈，我根据你的修改，又写了一篇，如下，请拍~

87) Claim: Any piece of information referred to as a fact should be mistrusted, since it may well be proven false in the future.
Reason: Much of the information that people assume is factual actually turns out to be inaccurate.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.

关键词列的如下，不知道准不准，提纲是4点，如下
key:any fact mistrusted, may false . much fact inaccurate
1.we should mistrust as the writer said
2.many theories are due to certain reasons and circumstances flase.
3.most cases ,our purpose is to verify the fact
4.technical development need this kind of spirit

Along with human society's progress,people's critical thinking keeps growing uninterruptly that they are able to mistrust the information refered to as a fact since much turns out to be inaccurate.As far as I'm concerned ,this phenomenon is exhilarating .This thinking is seriously needed for human's progess.Therefore, in my point of view,I am on the side of the claim that we should mistrust information which we refered to as a fact,but it's not  because it may be inaccurate, contrarily,our purpose is to certify it is veridical.

Admittedly,over the long history of human's civilization ,lots of examples expressed that these so-called facts were demonstrated as the truth at first,but proven false later.This may due to the certain circumstances and history limitation,then the fact cannot be penetratinigly studied.When the Geocentric Theory is firstly put forward,everyone regards it an indisputable fact exept Copernicus.Copernicus ,a famous astronomer,didn't believe in this recognized fact and proposed that our earth is just a normal planet in the cosmos rather than the center of it,it travels around the sun,after years of observation.This great found broke the steretype which has bound people'mind for many years and help people recognize the real world and true fact.Through this example ,we can see the mistrustion's useful power.

However ,in most cases ,we mistrust the fact not because it may be inaccurate,but want to certify it veridical.Many theories ,or facts are limited to the time when they are born  that they have no chance to be fully justified.We modern people can now help verify the accuracy to make them more convincing with the help of modern technology.Such as the old fact that the earth is round,we now can use the satillite to take photoes of the earth,or even we can fly to the space and have a look  ourselves.Then this fact will be more convincing,and we can use photoes to calculate the accurate size as well.In this way,we make a fact more understandable and accurate due to mistrust about facts.

In addition, human civilization's progress need this spirit of mistrust.Mistrust urges people  to find a more appropriate way to explain the existed theory or
fact,along with this process is the development of our technology.In the process of justifying a fact ,we may come across a new conclusion occasionally. Such as people found the new contents in  the process of proving the earth is round.All this lead to a significant development of human society,and it all attributes to mistrust about the existed fact.

To sum up,whatever the fact is ,mistrust should be encouraged that we donnot know what may be brought forward by it.Once a mistrust is proposed,we need to concentrate on it and devote enough power into it since the way to a clearly verified conclusion is not easy.In a word, we can mistrust facts,but we should pay much energy to justify it as well.

咖啡盐UID: 2973669

79) Since those issues of Newsbeat magazine that featured political news on their front cover were the poorest-selling issues over the past three years, the publisher of Newsbeat has recommended that the magazine curtail its emphasis on politics to focus more exclusively on economics and personal finance. She points to a recent survey of readers of general interest magazines that indicates greater reader interest in economic issues than in political ones. Newsbeat's editor, however, opposes the proposed shift in editorial policy, pointing out that very few magazines offer extensive political coverage anymore.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

之前看到咖啡盐版主的这个帖子https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mo ... 5060&highlight=，于是想卡时间写一下这篇文章。写之前看了一下帖子说的是啥了，算是偷懒了吧，呵呵。。。已自改单词错误，请版主狠拍。
-------------------------------------------------------------




As the argument above, the author recommended that the magazine curtails its emphasis on politics to focus more exclusively on economics and personal finance. It seems at first glance to be an obvious conclusion that transferring from politics to economics is a boost in sell. However, close scrutiny of the argument reveals the recommendation may not obtain the predicted result, rife with holes of evidence.


First and foremost, the author needs to answer the question that whether the style of the magazine, not the quality of content or the selling price, is the only factor that leads to the poorest-selling situation. On one hand, in any kinds of magazines, people tend to read the ones which have high-quality context filled with ideas and thoughts that truly values. It works especially on politics as comments and critics on politics need further objective insight, but not acting as a toady for a party or a policy. On the other hand, selling price is another important factor that can determine whether people will buy them. If the magazines were too expensive to get equivalent messages and informations, no one would spend money on them.


In addition, the question has to be answered that whether the opinion of the readers who received the recent survey can represent that of all readers where this magazine can publish.  Perhaps the survey was done in a magazine which focusses especially on economics and personal finance. In that case, most readers who take the survey are fans of economics and then, the result that indicates greater reader in economic issues than in political ones is lame.


What's more, the author needs to answer that whether only few people purchase the magazines on politics, which leads to unprofitableness, is the cause of the situation that very few magazines offer extensive political coverage anymore. The author did not show the evidence that low number of magazines is because no money can earn. However, several factors can cause this. For instance, topics on politics are hard to write well and only a few magazines can meet the highly demanding of huge quantity readers of politics, which results in the existing of few magazines that can offer extensive political coverage.


In sum, the author recommended to transfer magazine's focus from politics to economics and personal finance. Nevertheless, the statments not well reasoned for lack of strong support for what the author maintains. To make it logically acceptable, the questions above have to be answered to achieve a more sufficient conclusion. In addition, in order to solidify the argument, more evidence is required on curtailing its emphasis on politics which was its original sign of this magazine.

先mark一下

姚相全UID: 3201232

33. As we acquire more knowledge, things do not become more comprehensible, but more complex and mysterious.
当我们获得越多的知识时，事物不仅没有变得更加可理解，却反而变得更加复杂与神秘了。
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
提纲：（1）我们生活在一个知识爆炸的时代，我们人类知识的数量急剧增长，这似乎表明人对世界的认识越来越深刻了。
     （2）随着我们知识的不断增长，我们却发现世界在我们面前不是越来越清晰，而不是越来越模糊了。
     （3）我们却不能因此停止对世界的认识，也不能因此就否定知识与理性的力量。
     （4）我们由理性与科学研究所产生的知识是有限的，但是我们生活的世界却是无限的。
共506个单词，写作大概花了1小时，但是我是先列了一个非常详细的提纲。请楼主和各位大侠狠拍。正文如下：

The twenty first century has seen a rapid growth of knowledge, which is known as knowledge explosion age. Research has shown that the total amount of human knowledge doubles in very 7 to 10 years, especially in areas of energy science, information science, material science, marine science, microelectronic technology and computer technology. A series of new concepts, such as black hole, quark, dark matter, dark energy, extra high energy granule, seem to vindicate that we understand the world we live in deeper and deeper.

But it is ironical to find that with an increase in knowledge, we feel the world has become more and more complex and ambiguous, instead of being more clear and comprehensible. Take our effort to find out the smallest particle that made of matter as an example. At first, we regarded molecule and atom as the smallest particles. But later on, we realized that an atom is made of electron and nucleus which itself contains proton and neutron. Recently, scientists have discovered that proton and neutron is made of quark. Now, we regard quark as the smallest particle, but who dare to say that we will never discover some kind of particle that is smaller than quark? What’s more, these small particles don’t give us confidence that we have a deeper understand the world we live in. On the contrary, we feel that we live in a world that is complicated and mysterious.

Despite the fact that our increase of knowledge doesn’t guarantee our clear understanding of the world, we still can’t give up our effort the study the world as well as despise the power of knowledge. Suppose that Man is the central point of a circle, knowledge is the radius of the circle and the circumference is the boundary connected with the unknown world, we can find that the longer the radius, the larger the area of the circle, that’s to say, the more knowledge we get, we the more we know about the word,. But at the same time, it’s easy to see that the larger the circle, the wider the boundary, that’s to say, the more we know about the world, the more we feel ignorant. Take quark as example again. The discovery of quark actually makes us have a deeper understand the world, but we have to face a more intricate world made of quark, which evokes a feeling of ignorance. But it’s just in this way that we accumulate our knowledge.

What we should always bear in mind is that the knowledge produced by science is limited, but the world we live in is infinite. We are born of curiosity and eager to learn the world via reason. So, we are very small in the planet and science is just a candle lighted by human reason. Out the range of the candle light, we should be wary. We can go farther with humbleness and awe. Arrogance and conceit can just lead us into dark. We should always bear in mind the oracle in Delphi “know yourself”.

派~~UID: 3324201

补两天的作业
ARGUMENT50 薰衣草
An ancient, traditional remedy for insomnia—the scent of lavender flowers—has now been proved effective. In a recent study, 30 volunteers with chronic insomnia slept each night for three weeks on lavender-scented pillows in a controlled room where their sleep was monitored electronically. During the first week, volunteers continued to take their usual sleeping medication. They slept soundly but wakened feeling tired. At the beginning of the second week, the volunteers discontinued their sleeping medication. During that week, they slept less soundly than the previous week and felt even more tired. During the third week, the volunteers slept longer and more soundly than in the previous two weeks. Therefore, the study proves that lavender cures insomnia within a short period of time. [Specific Task Instruction: Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.]
========================================================
In the argument, the author claims that the scent of lavender flowers is effective to treat insomnia. And the author elaborates an experiment as evidence to support this claim. However, neither the conclusion itself nor the logic led to it is convincing enough to make the argument unvulnerable.

The threshold problem of this argument is that the author simply assumes that the lavender can cure insomnia within a short period of time, while the experiment is actually done in the group of people with chronic insomnia, making the conclusion has no effect-cause relationship with the study. To make his logic compelling, the author should firstly confirm that chronic insomnia is exactly the same thing as insomnia. Actually, besides chronic ones, insomnia includes other types such like ones caused by ephemeral anxious or excited emotions. Besides, no evidence is provided to show whether the patients in the experiment are cured or just get better. It is quiet possible that they increase their quality of sleep, if any, while far from being cured. Without these evidences required above, the author cannot make an effective effect-cause relationship between the investigation and its conclusion.

Although the author could confirm the question above, the argument still has problem by assuming that the investigation substantiates the validity of the lavender. The author does not show any evidence about the standards and critics about the insomnia, but use the words like “soundly” ”tired” to demonstrate the quality of the volunteers’ sleep. It is possible that after three weeks, the patience can still hardly fall asleep, though more soundly after they do, and only sleep say half an hour longer than they did three weeks ago. Or maybe they become more tired when they awake in the third week, which doesn’t supplied in the argument but might be the evidence to show the inefficacy of the lavender. Until giving further evidence to exclude all these possibilities, the author cannot persuade me to accept the conclusion.

Last but not the least, specific evidence is needed to illustrate that the better quality sleep, if can be proved, is caused by and only by the lavender. Perhaps the volunteers cannot fall asleep at the first place because of, rather than insomnia, the strange environment. After three weeks’ adaption, they can sleep better than before. Or perhaps the sleeping medication they took in the first week is work, or they are just too tired to sleep worse. To rolling these holes in the logic and make the argument valid, the experiment should provide another group of people with exact the same situation with this group except the lavender pillows, and observer the differences between these two groups, excluding all the other explanations.

To sum up, in order to make the argument compelling, the author should provide further evidences about the details in the experiment and set up the controlled group, to get available data and make the argument forceful.

派~~UID: 3324201

补issue4　写得很慢很慢很卡　觉得自己句式词汇都弱爆了
========================================================

Scandals are useful because they focus our attention on problems in ways that no speaker or reformer ever could.

很不熟练，很详细的提纲早就列好了，甚至有些句子都想好了。但是边查单词边写的，写了50分钟。唉。已经自己修改过一遍拼写，替换了几个用得不合适的词。满眼都是低级词汇和句子结构…..　求拍求拍求拍　

In the British teleplay <Black Mirror I>, the director tells an absurd story about a scandal, that the Premier is required to, by the kidnapper of the princess, have sex with a pig on the TV in front of the nation. And people, no matter with commiseration, abhorrence or indifference, wait in front of the TV and watch the whole process. This story, though fictional, reveals that people do love scandals. In one hand, scandals mostly mean facts. On the other hand, psychology study has shown that people love to pry others’ secret. As far as I concerned, scandal do has its value, but should be seen and treated in a rational and justified way.

Admittedly, scandal has a specific use as a kind of information. The first benefit of it is easily attracting attention. Compared to speeches, which is unauthentic for the public because of its characteristic of easily being adorned as a political advertisement, scandals are mostly ugly truth revealed in a shocking way. For instance, people may show apathy when listen to a lecture about bribery given by an office speaker, regard it as a performance. But when the Iraq bribery scandal erupted in 2007, people reacted with anger and blame immediately and began to check the political system in a wary way. And this event also shows another advantage of scandals, that they can disclose the holes in the existent system, by then can people fix it. When the glutin in food is tested out, the food industry set out an examination to verify its product process and people pay more attention to their health.

However, there is no doubt too that paying too much attention on scandals could cause problems. To the individuals involved in scandals, the mistakes they made once, and perhaps exaggerated by the mass medias, might destroy their whole life. Such like the sex photo scandal among Chinese actors several years ago, people berated all the people in the event, humiliated and abandoned them, but did not realize the hurt they throw to those people. And to the society, too much scandals and attention on them might cause passive emotions in the whole society. People might regard the society as a dirty, lack of moral and full of ugly one, and led to prevalence of extreme mood in the society at the end.

Thus, it is significant to treat the scandal with ration. The first thing people should do is judging a person without bias. Watergate scandal made Nexion a shamed president in the United State history, but we cannot ignore his contribute to the relationship between the USA and China. There is no perfect person in the world. And if you admit this, you must also admit that people cannot be judged by a single scandal. What’s more, it is the way we treat the scandal rather that the scandal itself that useful for our refining the society. Bribery scandals show us the holes in the political system, so we should check the operation of the government, fix the problems and perfect the supervise mechanism. Sex scandals debunk the loss of social moral so we should enhance our moral education. Only by resolving questions reflected in scandals could make them meaningful.

To sum up, scandal’s mood is rather irony than entertainment, and its goal is causing introspection in the whole society instead of impeaching several individuals. Under the simply seemed “facts”, the deeper meaning of scandal is being a specific way to show us the flaws of political and moral system. It is the way in which people treat it makes the scandal do or do not useful.

Ace-QiuUID: 3327387

谢谢楼主啊！！！无比感激！！！
Learning is primarily a matter of personal discipline, students cannot be motivated by school or college alone.

   This statement is comprised of two parts, where the first half accounts personal discipline for a primary impetus for learning, from which it draws a conclusion that school and college alone won’t offer sufficient motivation for students to learn. While I agree with the conclusion , I found the grounds of argument to be partially true, yet still less than unassailable.

　　Personal discipline is essential for students in the process of learning. The students who have the highest performance at school are usually those who are highly self-disciplined. However, personal discipline is just one of the characteristic that motivate student to learn. There are , according to educational psychology, two types of motivation: intrinsic motivation, which involves student’s intention to study for its own sake or for the sense of accomplishment in learning something new, and the extrinsic motivation, which is provided by external incentive to pull you to act. Ideally, motivation should be intrinsic. Students are willing to learn proactively and their satisfaction with the work is not influenced by external performance indicator such as grades. This is the situation where personal discipline is not needed at all since the student is totally driven by his own interest and passion.
　　
　　Nonetheless, since many students are not intrinsically motivated, especially the younger ones, external incentive should be introduced. It can be something more materialistic ,like a new car; or something more spiritual , like all the praises or envies we get from our friends,. In most cases, however, these kind of motivators will not provide adequate drive for students and do not last long. They will soon find themselves looking for excuses for not trying harder or even for giving up, that is when personal discipline comes into play. It is a crucial part in the course of learning, given that we all have to learn something that we find not to be intriguing enough from kindergarten through college. We can see that most students with an overall high academic performance are often those are highly self-disciplined.
　　
　　Thus, school and college could play an important role in both extrinsic motivation, intrinsic motivation. But motivation comes solely from school or college will indeed not suffice. Students needs to be motivated socially , materialistically , mentally, and most importantly, intrinsically. Personal discipline is a essential part of learning, but it is only necessary when student's intrinsic motivation is not enough.