L的Daily Writing

MELODYSKIINGUID: 2841950

30# loveinwc 喵星人…我每次见到你的头像都觉得很恐怖……= =地球被侵略了……

MELODYSKIINGUID: 2841950

喵星人 改好了……因为我11号就考了，所以比较速度....TT好紧张的说...

alexfanfanUID: 3133140

Love in wc 哈哈 我很喜欢这样看你的名字

sorry这么晚才给你改

alexfanfanUID: 3133140

match 有对手的意思～

alexfanfanUID: 3133140

恩 谢谢你给我改的
you啊you的我要好好改改呢

还有 应该是living:)

loveinwcUID: 3241878

M大人你有毛好紧张的，以您的水平= =……正常发挥肯定上100+ 32# MELODYSKIING

loveinwcUID: 3241878

汗，我是被迫无奈想不出用户名了…………能想到的都已经有人用了……啊啊啊啊……谢谢高人君的更改！！ 33# alexfanfan

loveinwcUID: 3241878

交晚了…………对不起各位高人…………以及，我没有想到今天一组有五个人！！！！五个人！！！！！泪奔而去……………………


2月9日 100924NA Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? College or University should offer students more preparation before they start working.


There is a common sense that after 4 years professional disciplines, undergraduates should have the basic skills to deal with their subsequent jobs. However, the fact always goes contrary to our wishes. There are many graduates from previous years who are still jobless. Most of headhunter would rather want a worker who has rich experiences than a student who just has theory knowledge. From this perspective, I would support the idea that students should be offered more preparation from college or university before they start working in order to better adapt themselves to the career life.

First of all, I believe that it is very important for students to learn how to apply their knowledge of theory in practice. There is a normal phenomenon that many students find their knowledge from school could not be well used into their work so that they have to learn every thing from fundamentals. Meanwhile, in an on-line survey named how do you feel about your university knowledge, 68% of participants chose the option-- most of university knowledge are useless in practical work, and 11% of participants chose the option---a little university knowledge could be used in work. In this way, universities could offer more internship positions to students during their summer holidays or the eve of graduations. On the other hand, professors could also more or less teach students the practical technologies which would be utilized in their involved jobs.

Moreover, in my opinion, before jumping into the pool named society, the students need some time to finish the process of psychological adaptation from students to workers. Because that many undergraduates could not change their attitude to treat their companies in time, some of their behaviors produce some bad influence on their future promotion. In order to avoid this situation happening, more and more colleges carry out the related courses to help students do better in their career planning as well as their preparation to face for the difficulties they will encounter immediately.

In conclusion, I agree that college or university should not offer students more preparation before they start working, but also assist them to do better mental modification. In addition, to model a student to a qualified job hunter, the relative lectures about how to use theory knowledge into practice is necessary.

水果的夏天UID: 3022981

加油

iBT20120304UID: 3228839

There is a common sense that after 4 years professional disciplines, undergraduates should have the basic skills to deal with their subsequent jobs. However, the fact (which fact? 我认为此处可以用things always goes ...) always goes contrary to our wishes. There are many graduates from previous years who are still jobless(still struggling to get a decent job 如何). Most of (of 多余) headhunter would rather want a worker (似乎该去掉冠词 a ) who has rich experiences than a student who just has theory knowledge. From this perspective, I would support the idea that students should be offered more preparation from college or university before they start working in order to better adapt themselves to the career life (出于句子结构的考虑，我认为这一小句可以提到前面去，会更加平衡).

First of all, I believe that it is very important for students to learn how to apply their knowledge of theory in practice. There is a normal phenomenon that many students find their knowledge from school could not be well used into their work so that they have to learn every thing from fundamentals. Meanwhile, in an on-line survey named how do you feel about your university knowledge, 68% of participants chose the option-- most of university knowledge are useless in practical work, and 11% of participants chose the option---a little university knowledge could be used in work. In this way, universities could offer more internship positions to students during their summer holidays or the eve of graduations. On the other hand, professors could also more or less teach students the practical technologies which would be utilized in their involved jobs." q8 n) ?# P$ s0 O6 X6 I  c

Moreover, in my opinion, before jumping into the pool named society, the students need some time to finish the process of psychological adaptation from students to workers. Because that many undergraduates could not change their attitude to treat their companies in time, some of their behaviors produce some bad influence on their future promotion. In order to avoid this situation happening, more and more colleges carry out the related courses to help students do better in their career planning (注意到你擅用长句。若用一逗号断句，可能会更方便读者的阅读理解) as well as their preparation to face for the difficulties they will encounter immediately.

In conclusion, I agree that college or university should not only offer students more preparation before they start working, but also assist them to do better mental modification. In addition, to model a student to a qualified job hunter, the relative lectures about how to use theory knowledge into practice is necessary.

楼主的词汇很丰富，有不少词语用得不仅准确，而且生动。
语法方面，几乎找不出明显的错误。
句子方面也很不错，通顺易懂。唯有一点。我认为，写长句子的时候，在运用合适句式结构的同时，一定要合理地断句，方便读者的阅读理解。

基于我之前考试的经验，如果楼主再稍加打磨一下语言，应该可以拿到29+的分数。加油哦！

LusotaUID: 2929567

喵星人-修by lusota.doc (30.5 KB, 下载次数: 6)

2012-2-10 19:50:27 上传

下载次数: 6

loveinwcUID: 3241878

谢谢阿达君！！阿达君您对我说的话简直是大鼓励啊有木有！！今天写这篇的时候已经做好了要被砖头拍死的准备了，什么29+啊我能上25我都要笑死了（狂哭ing。。写得无比痛苦啊纠结啊最后写完觉得自己简直是乱搞啊……这种感觉在看完阿达君你们的文章后更加强烈了，什么叫做高山仰止啊什么叫做花团锦簇啊我真的连自刎的心都有了喵~~~您的鼓励真的太安慰我了~~感动的泪奔了。。。 40# iBT20120304

nikiniki333UID: 2673802

There is a common sense that after 4 years professional disciplines, undergraduates should have the basic skills to deal with their subsequent jobs. However, the fact always goes contrary to our wishes. There are many graduates from previous years who are still jobless. Most of headhunter would rather want a worker who has rich experiences than a student who just has theory knowledge. From this perspective, I would support the idea that students should be offered more preparation from college or university before they start working in order to better adapt themselves to the career life.（我什么时候才能写出这样的开头啊）
f& [; y, g" S9 C8 x
First of all, I believe that it is very important for students to learn how to apply their knowledge of theory in practice. There is a normal phenomenon that many students find their knowledge from school could not be well used into their work so that they have to learn every thing from fundamentals.（everything） Meanwhile, in an on-line survey named how do you feel about your university knowledge,(named 后面那个要加“”吗,要不加个—？) 68% of participants chose the option-- most of university knowledge are useless in practical work, and 11% of participants chose the option---a little university knowledge could be used in work. In this way, universities could offer more internship positions to students during their summer holidays or the eve of graduations. On the other hand, professors could also more or less teach students the practical technologies which would be utilized in their involved jobs.


Moreover, in my opinion, before jumping into the pool named society, the students need some time to finish the process of psychological adaptation from students to workers. Because that many undergraduates could not change their attitude to treat their companies in time, some of their behaviors produce some bad influence on their future promotion.（because 后不用that了吧） In order to avoid this situation happening, more and more colleges carry out the related courses to help students do better in their career planning as well as their preparation to face for the difficulties they will encounter immediately. : H& {  X  q; _% @& k7 y
( r! m7 M/ J0 a" W; n4 A- u9 o
In conclusion, I agree that college or university should not offer students more preparation before they start working, but also assist them to do better mental modification.（should not..but also..？） In addition, to model a student to a qualified job hunter, the relative lectures about how to use theory knowledge into practice is necessary.



清晰的结构，简单清楚的表达，丰富的词汇，这是我的梦想啊。。。崇拜下～～～

loveinwcUID: 3241878

依旧想死啊………………恳请高人们勿要手软…………憋了一个小时才想出两个论点，到考场上铁定完蛋了！！！

2月10日 101203NA Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents should help children to do their work or encourage children to do their work independently.

I once heard an interesting chinese allegory ----once upon a time, there was a farmer who tried to help the shoots grow by pulling them upward, but only resulted them in death. Caring for their offspring is parents' instinct, like the farmer raising his shoots. But excessive enthusiasm sometimes would lead to the adverse result-- let their treasure be spoiled by spoiling. To my opinion, helping the children do work too much times might be one of these behaviours. So I agree that parents should encourage their children to do work independently as possible.

First of all, to do work independently has one advantage is that children could learn the fundamental knowledge they should know by themselves. Besides the so called exam points, the teachers would certainly want students to gain their command of knowledge through the course of homework. If the children got used to have their parents do the homework for them, they would regret sooner or later. Like the farmer, whose shoots seemed growing well, but presently he found that his shoots didn't absorb the necessary nutrition, water and sunlight by themselves, their mature was only an illusion. It was too late.

Moreover, there is another advantage for parents to let their children do work independently. it could let their children grow up with independence. As everyone knows, every child will grow up into an adult. And eventually, they will run into some situation where no one to count on but themselves. So to learn independence earlier will benefit their future. It is said, as the time comes, falcons will take their offspring to the highest cliff, and then they loose their claws, push the youngster to fall down, until they learn how to fly or die. It sounds cruel. In my opinion, sometimes, a critical pace is necessary in our growing time. Some one even said growing process is painful. In fact, doing homework independently just is the first pace to learn how to be a real adult. Parents can not help them forever. Earlier or later, they will be aware of that. May be that is a challenge for the children, but why not let them have a try?

These two reasons above are sufficient for me to conclude that parents should encourage their children do work independently, no matter how they love them. This way to help their children will be more beneficial for the offspring's long term development.

loveinwcUID: 3241878

汗，担不起这样的夸奖啊…………我简直要泪牛满面了…… 43# nikiniki333