argument同主题写作第二类 8月16-17日

HelloC424UID: 3815350

53) The following appeared in a health magazine.

The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.



开头段：

A magazine did a survey through citizens of Forsythe revealed that they have adopted a kind of more healthful lifestyles due to three aspects: more consistent eating habits to the 10-year-old recommended nutritional standards, increasing sales in a more healthful food products and decreasing sales of a food that seldom eaten by healthy citizens.
From my perspective that we should scrutinize critically to this argument and need more information.
中间段：
First, more information about the survey among citizens should be offered. The argument did not showed the results of whether  the nutritional recommendations may have changed in 10 years. Did the researcher compare different results between these 10 years? Because with the development of our science, there might be some changes of what we thought is correct in the past. If this standards changed, the results in the above may not be valid enough to support the claim.

结尾段：
In conclusion, evaluating wether the citizens of Forsythe are more healthful through referring to the government recommended standards may be helpful but we should be attention to the date because conditions and environment are changed fleetingly. Also, observing the eating habits from any specific kind of food may also be helpful but may not lead to a valid and concrete result. To gain the claim of the argument, we need more datas from scientific survey.


claim:The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles.
data1: The citizens adopted eating habits that are more consist to the nutritional recommendation from government 10 years ago.
warrant: The nutritional standards of government was official and healthy.

question:  Are there any scientific datas show that the government standards are still healthful? In ten years, are there any changes of the standard? Because with the development of our science, there might be some changes of what we thought is correct in the past.
evidence: Scientific proof shows that the nutritional  recommendations are still efficacious.
assumption: That their consistency of the government recommended food standards  still remain powerful and healthful.

data2: Sales of food that has been proved could reduced cholesterol are increasing.
warrant: Kiran is healthy. Increasing intake of this healthy food that contains kiran will help the citizen be more healthful.

question: How much do a person intake Kiran will be healthful? We need more specific datas. Besides, what if those food which contains kiran also have other elements such as sugar and fat that are harmful to health?
evidence: Need scientific data to inform us about the dose of this kind of food and other detail about that this food is free of other unhealthy elements.
assumption: These food that contains kiran is healthy for citizens.

data3:Sales of food that healthy citizens will not regularly eat are decreasing.
warrant: Decreasing to eat the foods are regarded as unhealthy is benefit for the citizens’ health.

questions: Are there any beneficial elements are also contained in this kind of food. Need more specific data to show this kind of food is unhealthy for people. Maybe this result is only ostensible and only due to the preferences of people who are regarded as healthy.
evidence: Scientific results of whether this kind of food in harmful for people’s health.
assumption: Decreasing the intake of this unhealthy food.


对照了老师的范文，两个问题：
1.概括不够精准
2.老师写人们饮食习惯变了，我写政府标准变了。人们饮食习惯变了更好一点。

国产耗子UID: 3484678

144) The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the healthiest citizens regularly eat.

Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

Claim: The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles.

Data: Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago.

Warrant: the survey can represent most of the citizen and is the really eating habit.

Assumption:The recommendation from government is can make people live healthier than others. -there are not other eating habits they can follow.

Claim: The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles.

Data: there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol.

Warrant: eating food products containing kiran cam make people healthier.
Assumption: There are not other food products which can reduce cholesterol, too. The customer who eating Kiran are health people.

Claim：The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles.

Data：This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the healthiest citizens regularly eat.

Warrant: sulia is one kind of food can’t make people healthy.

Assumption: people who don’t want to buy sulia because sulia is not a healthy food.

开头：According to this article, the writer claim that the citizens of Forthythe are living in more healthful lifestyle. The writer citing the survey, the increasing sale of food with Kiran, and the decreasing sale of sulia to prove his/her view. However, assumptions have to be adjusted to make this article more strength.

中间段
First of all, it is assumed that the recommendation from government is can make people live healthier than other recommendation. The survey mentioned that citizens conform more closely to government recommendation. Maybe, 10 years ago, citizens have their own eating habits which are way more better the government’s advice today. If in this situation, then we can’t say people in this city today are living more healthier than 10 years go.

MorfireUID: 3747042

151) Benton City residents have adopted healthier lifestyles. A recent survey of city residents shows that the eating habits of city residents conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. During those ten years, local sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol, have increased fourfold, while sales of sulia, a food rarely eaten by the healthiest residents, have declined dramatically. Because of these positive changes in the eating habits of Benton City residents, we predict that the obesity rate in the city will soon be well below the national average.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.

1
Claim: Benton City residents have adopted healthier lifestyles
Data: a survey
Warrant: it is convincing

2
Claim: eat healthier
data: local sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol, have increased fourfold, while sales of sulia, a food rarely eaten by the healthiest residents, have declined dramatically
Warrant: it can reflect accurately lifestyle

3
Claim: the obesity rate in the city will soon be well below the national average
Data: positive changes in the eating habits
Warrant: eating habits help a lot

While it may be forthcoming that people in Benton City have an affinity for healthy lifestyle, and the obesity rate will be lower than the national average, this argument dose not necessarily prove its conclusion, and needs more information to make it sound in terms of the survey, the food, and eating habits.
段1：survey样本问题（抽样数量、随机性），权威与否。可能有些地方的人更健康。
段2：even if 段1，人们可能出于食物口味变化、商场供货减少、价格变化等其他原因改变购物风格。其他食物也需要证据。
段3：
Even if people choose the food that can reduce cholesterol on the purpose of eating healthily, it still based on the assumption that positive changes of diet could obviously and profoundly get residents in Benton City rid of obesity. Although, it is unassailable that eating habits contribute to the overall health, we can not be sure about the extend. We do not know if people there eat healthier but in the same time do less exercise, which, in some cases, might even increase the rate of obesity. Hence, this argument should provide the sports data while talking about food in order to convince readers that the obesity rate will soon be lower than the national average.

评：30楼
开头段：接连两个at that time，删掉前面那个吧？
whether… are…

主体：
Geographical transformation from that time也可以用来替换
May be,   是Maybe，
May be,  at the time the river was shallow and narrow enough that people could swim or walk across the river.我觉得这边后面可以在说清楚一点：thus, P could bring their baskets to other places through the river.

TaylorWUID: 3668665

53) The following appeared in a health magazine.

The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.



The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago.
Claim：The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles for results from a survey.
Assumption: Responses can represent all citizens
Questions
-Who response to the survey and how they response it should be known .

Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol.
Claim: Sales of kiran concluded products spurs which means people are looking for it.
Assumption: Sales can represent people’s intention on shopping.
Questions
-There are many reasons for people buying certain products , without further information such as a survey about why people buying it , we cannot draw such conclusion .
-Eating a certain food is not enough to be the standard for healthy lifestyle .There are other things for a healthy lifestyle such as working out and their whole diet .

This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat.
Claim: Sales of sulia reduced means citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles.
Assumption : Healthy people can be the standard to decide if a food is healthy or not.
Question:
-We need more information about sulia , since we don’t know if sulia is harmful to one’s health .
-Even if sulia is harmful to health , we still don’t know why these healthy people abandon it from their diet . Maybe it’s simply because of its taste.


TS: In this article , the author claim that citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles, To support this recommendation the argument point out that a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations and increase in sales of food that contains kiran and sales of a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat called sulia reduced. However the author’s reasoning is incomplete unless additional information are given. Without certain data we can’t evaluate author’s reasoning line and draw a conclusion.

Pt1:  To start with, we need to consider the fundamental question whether the survey the author provides is valid. Since we are not given any information about the scope of the survey or the constituent of respondents, it is possible that the survey is biased, or statistically invalid at all. For example, the author didn’t mention who took part in the survey there is a possibility that only healthy people response to it .If so , few healthy people’s attitude can’t represent every citizen in the Forsythe. Moreover, information about how the survey really is are quite limited . if the survey is nothing but asking people questions , the reliability of the results are doubted for we can’t guarantee everyone tell the truth. Also , author compare these data to the data ten years ago, but we don’t have evidence about if they are the same people. There is a possibility people who are invested now are no longer the same people who provide data ten years ago .

envy213UID: 3830262

53) The following appeared in a health magazine.


The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat.


Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument


Claim1: The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles.


data1: Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago


Warrant1: nutritional eating habits mean healthful lifestyles


Claim2:The eating habits of citizens have been improved


data2:there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol.


Warrant2:increasing sales of healthy food reflect that citizens adopt healthier eating habits.


claim3:citizens eat healthier than before


data3:This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat


Warrant1: healthy citizens don’t eat sulia, the unhealthy food



Introduction
According to the article in a health magazine, the The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles.The author based his assumption on the survey that
the citizens of Forsythe conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago,which is reflected on the sales of food products--sales of heathy foods have risen while sales of unhealthy foods have declined.However, the assumption should be taken with a salt of pinch because a healthy lifestyle is not just about eating habit but also about various factors,so is the sales of food.

Middle part 1
First and foremost, it is assumed that The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Though the survey reflect that the citizens' eating habits conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago, a healthy lifestyle is a product of various factors. Maybe the citizens eat healthier than before while also exercise less ,which must be counterproductive to the development of healthy lifestyle.Hence, the citizens may not adopt more healthful lifestyles.

xiulin2015UID: 3609356

151) Benton City residents have adopted healthier lifestyles. A recent survey of city residents shows that the eating habits of city residents conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. During those ten years, local sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol, have increased fourfold, while sales of sulia, a food rarely eaten by the healthiest residents, have declined dramatically. Because of these positive changes in the eating habits of Benton City residents, we predict that the obesity rate in the city will soon be well below the national average.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.


claim: It is predicted that the obesity rate in the obesity rate in the Benton city will soon be well below the national average because of the positive changes in the eating habits of its residents.
data: food products containing kiran, reducing cholesterol, have increased fourfold.  
data: sales of sully have decline dramatically.
warrant: the eating habits of the city residents is confirmed to be more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago.

Introduction Paragraph:
This argumentation predicts the obesity rate in Benton city will soon be lower than the national average due to the positive changes in the residents’ eating habits. However the questions to this prediction are whether the food products containing kiran and sulia have any relations to the obesity.

Middle Paragraph
The recent survey shows local sales of food products containing kiran have increased fourfold and it is regarded as a substance to reducing cholesterol. It is not quite clear whether that food is helpful to control the obesity and maybe the cholesterol is originally not that high in the bodies of the residents here. If there are no surveys to show the changes of cholesterol level 10 years ago and after, the increasing of kiran food couldn’t be taken as the positive change to decrease the obesity rate. The other possible scenario is the increased sales of Kiran food are not consumed by most of the residents in Benton city but only a few residents who actually have higher demand on this sort of food products than 10 years ago.Then it is very necessary to investigate what are the food eaten daily by most people living in Benton City and whether the cholesterol rate has dropped hugely in comparison of that in 10 years ago.

The survey also shows the declining of sales of sulia in the last decade and it is believed as a positive change to decrease obesity as this food is rarely eaten by the healthiest residents. As such, it is very conspicuous whether these residents are healthiest due to the deficiency of sulia. It could be for many reasons for them to keep healthy and become the healthiest but not happen to be only for one food. Furthermore there is no strong evidence to indicate sulia will increase obesity as there is no survey to demonstrate sulia appeared most frequently on the food menu of the patients with obesity. Therefore to clarify whether less sulia would contribute positively to the lower obesity rate needs more researches on the food menus of obesity residents and differences from the healthiest people in dinning and living habits.         

前意识的斑点UID: 3383834

144) The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the healthiest citizens regularly eat.

Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.


Claim: The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles.
Data: There is a recent survey shows that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago.
Warrant: This survey is good enough to show the reality of the citizens of Forsythe

Assumption: This survey is good enough to show the reality of the citizens of Forsythe

Claim: The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles.
Data: there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol.
Warrant: There are increasing number of people start to buy healthy food products


Claim: The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles.
Data: This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the healthiest citizens regularly eat.
Warrant: There are a decreasing number of people that are willing to buy sulia because they prefer healthier food.

Introduction:
In this argument, the author states that the individuals of Forsythe are used to more healthful lifestyles. In order to strengthen the argument, the author makes bold assumptions about a recent survey, the sales rate of healthy and unhealthy food products. However, this does not constitute a logical argument in favor of its conclusion and fails to provide convincing support making the argument sound.

Middle:
To begin with, it is assumed that the recent survey can mirror the reality of the individuals of Forsythe. The survey might not take a lot of factors into account, such as genders, ages as well as accuracy. For example, the female of Forythe were far more into healthy diet than the male. Thus, if the institution that performed the survey had more female samples than male samples, the result would not be accurate enough. What's more, the social background of the survey sample is unknown. Maybe all the rich people of Forsythe were into healthier diet than they did ten years ago because they had the budget. However, the middle class and below of Forsythe were still not capable of affording this kind of lifestyle. As a result, if the survey only samples from a certain group of people, it could not reflect the reality.

Even if the survey is strong enough to mirror the truth, the author fails to draw out the connection between kiran and healthy lifestyle. H/She assumes that the sales of food products containing Kiran went up because people were into healthy food. Admittedly, kiran is a healthy ingredient itself. However, it is possible that the food products containing Kiran are actually not healthy. Most of them contain a lot of fat and oil. Individuals bought them mainly because of the taste.

Similarly, the author assumes that the sales of sulia reduced because healthy lifestyles are trendy this day. However, the reason why the healthiest citizens did not eat it is unknown. Maybe the food itself contains a lot of proteins as well as vitamins, but it does not taste good. In fact, the cooking method for this ingredient might extremely complicated. Or, farmers put a lot of pesticides when sulia are growing. As a result, individuals stop purchasing it because they were scared of pesticides. Thus, it can not showcase that people stopped purchasing it because of the trend.

In conclusion, the writer states that more individuals of Forsythe were into healthful lifestyles. However, the survey and the sale rate of certain food products might not be strong enough support this argument.

listeningwuttUID: 3814547

144) The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the healthiest citizens regularly eat.
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

Claim: Following the government nutritional recommendation will lead to a healthful lifestyles.
Data: Recent survey suggests that the eating habits of citizens are more conformed to the government nutritional recommendation than 10 years before.
Warrant: government nutritional recommendation is good.

Claim: Eating more iran will lead to health.
Data: The increasing in the sales of food containing kiran
Warrant: kiran can reduce cholesterol.

Claim: Eating less sulia will lead to health.
Data: reduce sales of sulia
Warrant: the healthiest citizens regularly don’t eat sulia

According to the reading material, the lifestyles of the citizens of Forsythe have become much healthier, because of the surveys conducted on the eating hats and the food sales. Several assumptions have been made about the government nutritional recommendation, kiran, and the sulia, in develop the argument. However, these assumptions need to be scutinized critically to assess the conclusion.

To begin with, the author assumes that the government nutritional recommendations is good. Thus when citizens are more attached to these recommendations, they will have a good heath. However, recommendations may be made by some unprofessional persons, which means they cannot guarantee for health or even leads to being harmful for bodies. If recommendations were not healthy or effective, the citizens’ wouldn’t have become healthier.

点评37楼：
我觉得你的三个切入点都是好的
但是每个切入点中的展开有一些问题，不是很清楚。
比如说在调查人背景不同这一点，你提到了富人和穷人的人生健康可能变化不一样，那么之后你应该提，这个调查把目标人群都锁定在上流阶级了，所以调查上虽然是健康了，但不代表整个社会的水平。
再者，你的这一段背景这里，只提到上中流人群金钱背景不一样，之后也要提到这导致他们是否有能力去按着镇府建议的食谱饮食。要把材料里的 recommendations 加到你的推导里

前意识的斑点UID: 3383834

listeningwutt 发表于 2017-8-17 21:48
144) The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent su ...

看了一下哈~，感觉第一个warrant有点不对，不是应该看assume了啥咩，
第二三个不是应该看本质咩

感觉看了文章有一点语法错误，比如in develop the argument，然后感觉下边的第一段的例子不够有说服力~应该说这个研究有问题，可能会更好

alicechun95UID: 3729243

Arg 1 Palean Basket unique

Woven baskets characterized by a particular distinctive pattern have previously been found only in the immediate vicinity of the prehistoric village of Palea and therefore were believed to have been made only by the Palean people. Recently, however, archaeologists discovered such a 'Palean' basket in Lithos, an ancient village across the Brim River from Palea. The Brim River is very deep and broad, and so the ancient Paleans could have crossed it only by boat, and no Palean boats have been found. Thus it follows that the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

Claim: ancient Paleans could have crossed the Brim River only by boat
Data: Lithos is an ancient village across the Brim River from Palea, and the river is very deep and broad.
Warrant: the river is deep and broad now, so it was the same in the past.

Evidence: the accurate state of this river at the same time as woven baskets, records about the development of the Brim River

claim: Paleans did not invent boat at that time (implied)
data: no Palean boats have been found
warrant: if boats are not found now, they don’t exist in the past.

evidence: records or documents about boats at that time, if there are any limitations on the excavation of relics in the local area; or the evidence that the boats were destroyed before.

Claim: The basket found in Lithos is believed to be produced by the local people.(implied)
data: archaeologists discovered such a 'Palean' basket in Lithos
Warrant:  the baskets were invented by the people living in the place where they were found.

Evidence: other documents to prove the baskets are invented by Lithos, maybe it was just taken to Lithos by someone


开头段：
According to the statement, Palean baskets are not uniquely Palean due to the fact that archaeologists have found a similar one in Lithos. Given the fact that there’s a deep and broad river between Palea and Lithos and no remainings of Palean boats have been found by scientists, it is believed that maybe people in Lithos also invented the same baskets. However, evidences on the river, boat and basket inventor need to be assessed in order to make the statement sound.

露葵.UID: 3822722

Arg 1 Palean Basket unique

Woven baskets characterized by a particular distinctive pattern have previously been found only in the immediate vicinity of the prehistoric village of Palea and therefore were believed to have been made only by the Palean people. Recently, however, archaeologists discovered such a 'Palean' basket in Lithos, an ancient village across the Brim River from Palea. The Brim River is very deep and broad, and so the ancient Paleans could have crossed it only by boat, and no Palean boats have been found. Thus it follows that the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean.
思路：河在那时存在吗=>河存在的话档得住人吗=>河挡得了人，那没找到船一定代表没船吗。有没有桥


claim: The Palean baskets were origined both Palean and Lithos.
data: The Palean baskets were discovered in Lithos, where the Palean people could not reach by boat.
assumption1: The only way to cross the river for Palean people is taking a boat.
The river really exist at Palean period.
The river has been deep and broad from ancient time.
There was no periods when the river was frozen.
No brigdes built.
No other roads ever existed.
evidence1: More information about the  paleoclimate and paleotopography.


claim:There were no boats in the history of Platean.
assumption: If no boats were found in the remains, there were no boats at all.
evidence:  

文章： 前面那个cycle有点乱哈，看文章应该思路更清楚
开头：
While it may be true that Palean baskets were not uniquely, the author fails to analyze other possible scenarios to fully evaluate this case. According to the argument, Palean baskets were found in Lithos, across a river from Palean. In addition, no boats were found in Palean, and thus, the authors concludes that the Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean. Nevertheless, it's necessary to offer more information about the existence of the river at ancient time, the climate and tectonic movement of Palean and the technologies of Palean people.

To begin with, it's assumed that the Palean people couldn't go across the Brim river on the account of its depth and width. However, there is no evidence that the river had already existed at that time. It's possible that a tectonic motion like an earthquake produced a river between Palean and Lithos after Palean period. In this case, the Palean people were able to bring their baskets to Lithos by just walking. So evidence of the existence of Brim river at Palean period should be offered.

Secondly, even if the river did exist at that time, it doesn't necessarily mean the river can prevent people from going across it with no boats. Consider the possibility that Brim river is not as deep as it is now, or that the climate is so much colder than today that the water was frozen every winter. balabala....
(need evidence about the climate and terrain of Palean )

Granted that people cannot go to the other side without a boat because of the river, still, another important evidence we need is about the technologies of Palean people. Given no Palean boats have been found, the author reached a conclusion that there were no boats built in Palean. However,..balbala
(need evidence that they couldn’t build bridge and that the main material they could have used will remain until today )

结尾：In a nutshell, considering all the possible scenarios above, the argument is only  one of the posibilities, and more specific evidences are required to make a conclusion.

疑问：各位~小白求解答！！

写作指引里有一句：explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument，我这里写了需要的evidence，但是感觉好像没怎么写它将对argument造成什么影响，请问要怎么改来贴合这个指引？还是说有前文指出作者思维漏洞，another scenario 就可以啦？
另外，我看到很多人说这种一段一段让步even/even though/granted that 写法XDF很推崇，会不会造成大家都这样写，非常模板化，导致分数很低呢。但是我确实觉得这样让步很有道理啊。。。   求解答~谢谢！

批改：14楼
三个攻击点是准的

中见段的第二段，中写售卖总量变多但是人均变少，可是argument中写的是增加四倍哦，人口激增四倍还是不太可能吧。我觉得不如写含有kiran产品的其他添加剂不明确，需要知道这些产品是否高糖，高油脂

结尾段，food containing in daily life 似乎与第二第三个论点不对应，还有instead of assumption or the laboratory. 应该是lab results吧，还有lab 的结果应该是作者assumption 的一部分才对。

taylor1995UID: 3820421

151) Benton City residents have adopted healthier lifestyles. A recent survey of city residents shows that the eating habits of city residents conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. During those ten years, local sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol, have increased fourfold, while sales of sulia, a food rarely eaten by the healthiest residents, have declined dramatically. Because of these positive changes in the eating habits of Benton City residents, we predict that the obesity rate in the city will soon be well below the national average.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.

claim:  the obesity rate in the city will soon be well below the national average.
data:1.the increasement of local sales of food products containing kiran
        2.the sales of sulia, a food rarely eaten by the healthiest residents, have reduced
Warrant: citizens eat more healthy food and less unheathy food.

Intro
According to a recent survey, the Benton citizens’ eating habits are more close to the government healthy suggestion than before. Given the fact that some positive changes of eating habits were kept, the writer argues that the obesity rate in Benton will decrease and be below the native average rate. Many assumptions are put forward in this argument, but it should be proved to strengthen this argument.

Middle
First, the conclusion come from a recent survey, but there is no data to show how many people join this survey which loses the reliability. Second, the writer believed that the increased sales of the food including kiran which decline the cholesterol indicated more citizens change to healthy life style. However, such a fact does not necessarily imply healthiness. It may be not only good for reducing the cholesterol but the cheaper price. Then, another assumption is the reduction of sulia, because of the reduction in heathiest citizens. There is no evidence to prove sulia is unfavorable to people and what kind of people buy it. In conclusion, it not adequate to obtain this argument.

MaggieLLLLLLUID: 3827790

151) Benton City residents have adopted healthier lifestyles. A recent survey of city residents shows that the eating habits of city residents conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. During those ten years, local sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol, have increased fourfold, while sales of sulia, a food rarely eaten by the healthiest residents, have declined dramatically. Because of these positive changes in the eating habits of Benton City residents, we predict that the obesity rate in the city will soon be well below the national average.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.
       
Claim: Benton City residents have adopted healthier lifestyles.
Data: A recent survey of city residents shows that the eating habits of city residents conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago.
Warrant: The survey is reliable

Claim: Benton City residents have adopted healthier lifestyles.
Data: During those ten years, local sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol, have increased fourfold
Warrant: The rising sales of products containing kiran means that people are living more healthily

Claim: Benton City residents have adopted healthier lifestyles.
Data: sales of sulia, a food rarely eaten by the healthiest residents, have declined dramatically.
Warrant: the declining sales of sulia is the result of the healthier lifestyle of Benton’s citizens

Claim: The obesity rate of the city will soon below the national average
Warrant: Benton City residents have adopted healthier lifestyles.

The author of this argument reached a conclusion that the obesity rate of Benton City will soon be below the national average as, proposed by the author that, Benton’s citizens have developed a healthier lifestyle. To support this argument, the author addressed 3 specific evidence that a recent survey shows people’s eating habits skewed more towards national recommendation, and that the sales of the products containing kiran has increased while the sales of sulia has decreased. In order to examine the validity of the argument, however, we still need to ask more questions, which are whether the survey is reliable and representative, whether the increasing sales of food containing kiran and dropping sales of sulia are reliable indicators of healthier lifestyle.

Firstly, we need to ask more questions about the survey. Are the questions well-designed to avoid any misunderstanding among its respondents? Are the questionnaire distributed through proper channels that would make everybody has the equal chance to participate in? As the development and advancement of the computers and mobile phones has increased dramatically, more and more questionnaires started to be distributed through online channel, though really convenient, would have the problems when the voice of people who don’t have the access to the internet may be ignored. Also, are the comparison of eating habits between what people currently have and ten years ago reasonable? Do they do the study longitudinally or simply ask people to recall what they eat ten years ago. If it is simply a recall, the reliability of the survey results would be undermined as it relies on people’subjective memories which would be mistaken or twist.

xiulin2015UID: 3609356

TaylorW 发表于 2017-8-17 21:29
53) The following appeared in a health magazine.

The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healt ...

your middle paragraph is impressive as it is a holistic review on the research structure and how the research is conducted. However the middle paragraph is supposed to review and elaborate on one particular aspect in the argumentation. Hence I am not sure whether it is more appropriate to put your general review at last or put it as part of the introduction paragraph. Moreover, the test requires what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and it might be missing from your middle paragraphs. For your reference only. Appreciate your point of view on samples, the change of samples through the decade.     

Leona2017UID: 3829393

Arg 1 Palean Basket unique

Woven baskets characterized by a particular distinctive pattern have previously been found only in the immediate vicinity of the prehistoric village of Palea and therefore were believed to have been made only by the Palean people. Recently, however, archaeologists discovered such a 'Palean' basket in Lithos, an ancient village across the Brim River from Palea. The Brim River is very deep and broad, and so the ancient Paleans could have crossed it only by boat, and no Palean boats have been found. Thus it follows that the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

Claim:Woven baskets characterized by a particular distinctive pattern were believed to have been made only by the Palean people
Data:They are found only in the immediate vicinity of the prehistoric village of Palea
Warrant: If something is found only in a certain area, the thing is unique in that place.

Claim: Paleans could have crossed it only by boat
Data:The Brim River is very deep and broad
Warrant:Boating is the only way for people at the time to cross the river
Question: What if there’s an unfound road that connects B&L under the river?

Claim:The so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean
Data: No Palean boats have been found
Warrant:If the boats had been built, they must be found
Question: What if the boats are destroyed or sink?

According to this argument, the Palean baskets are not unique in that area since they were also found in another village nearby. However, to strengthen the soundness of this argument, more evidence is required. We need to know more about the geographical information of the area, the record of the traffic between the two villages and the materials of the baskets.

We need to know more about the geographical information of the area. In other words, it is possible that there had been a path that connected Palea and Lithos but it was covered by the deep water so has not been discovered yet. If the path existed, then people from Palea could simply go to Lithos on foot instead of by boat and therefore, the baskets could be brought to another place without any boats.